Omg. So last night with my teenage DD was rough. I found out she's been lying to me about her schoolwork and when we all go to bed at nine, she's been sneaking onto her school laptop and chatting with her friends until midnight/ 1 am. Mostly with one girlfriend, (that I cannot stand). So this morning I contacted the school and they are setting it up so her laptop will no longer function between the hours of 8 pm and 6 am. Then I contacted the other girl's mom.and she said she talked to her kid, and they only stay up that late on the weekends. I sent her screenshots of the date/time stamp and told her apparently my kid isn't the only one being dishonest. So my kid is my TW. The other kid is a TW, and the other parent is a TW.
@modoodles if it helps you feel ANY better, my friend's daughter was around the same age and constantly lying about school work and stuff. To the point that if she didn't turn in her assignments, she was going to fail classes. Needless to say, my friend was livid. Her daughter was grounded, got all her schoolwork in, and passed... but my friend still has to keep an eye on her to make sure stuff is getting done... and she's going into HS now. So, your daughter is being a normal asshole teenager lol
Work is my TW? I do the all the marketing for the company and a very small portion of our sales (my territory is maybe 1/6 of everything) and mostly consists of supporting new and current customers. Anyway, once a Q I have to make cold calls to businesses to try to get them trying our stuff. I haaaate it! I understand it's a necessary evil if we want to continue to expand our customer base. But I hate interrupting people's work days to be like, "hey... let me send you some info about us and some samples. k, thanks!" So, today, I'm doing that and basically looking for any distraction possible.... except that I'm caught up on everything else and this is what needs to happen so I can check the box before end of year. Blah
My daughter is a freshman and the end of the semester is on Friday. She's been telling me she stays after school to do schoolwork at least 3 days a week for the last month. If she doesnt do some type of massive turnaround by Friday she will fail 3 core classes. She is also involved in cheerleading, band, and a competition show choir, so she won't be eligible for those activities anymore either. We've been going over this stuff for so long, I just dont get it. Plus, part of her poor grades is due to not taking in class quizzes and tests. Apparently she just sits there while everyone else takes them and she doesnt do anything? I'm pretty much breathing fire 🔥🔥🔥 at her right now.
@modoodles my friend's daughter was in school cheer as well as competition cheer and tumbling and was threatened to have all that taken away. That's a lot of what got her doing better. The quizzes and tests would pisssss me off! OMG! Like, wtf are you even doing with your life right now?! lol.... Will the teacher let her do those again? Also, do you think maybe she's not feeling confident in her ability and that's why she's just not taking them?
@modoodles Ugh, teenagers! I am so sorry you are having to deal with this! I'm a high school teacher of mostly Seniors, and I see this kind of stuff ALL. THE. TIME. Freshmen are often the hardest since they are adjusting to high school life and don't often realize so much more of keeping on top of things is their responsibility. I send e-mails almost every single day to parents of kids who are just not doing their work. The whole sitting there and not even attempting tests/quizzes just baffles me. If it's multiple choice...guess! duh!
My TW was going to be my students, so it's pretty much the same as yours! I have one that owes me 2 tests and a quiz and didn't show up to his midterm today after going to his other midterm earlier in the morning. GAH. Now I'm trying to track his butt down.
ETA: Them turning off her computer use is SO COOL. Technology is great.
@modoodles no children but I'm married to a high school math teacher. You are not alone in this struggle. It always suprises how many stories there are about students just sitting and not participating. It's great that you care too many parents aren't paying attention or tell the teachers very rude things when they check on kids.
@modoodles ahhh I'm so scared of having a teenager! I have no advice, but I'm wishing you luck! I hope the threat of ineligibility for extracurriculars is the wake up call she needs.
@enchantindragon TW is all about context. It can be trigger warning, but in this case it's twatwaffle, a technical term of course. It took me soooo long to figure out all the abbreviations on here last time haha
This whole thread is a really healthy reminder of the fact that the little beans we're all growing won't just be babies and toddlers but will grow up to be teenagers someday eeeek!
@stlbuckeye132 Ok twatwaffle makes much more sense after reading all these replies because I couldnt figure out how any of these were trigger warnings to be honest. Now I get it lol Thank you for helping me not be lost.
So now that I understand what TW actually means I will say the Girl Scouts is mine. For an organization that is a 100 years old it seems to be run by dodos. Their site is the worst too in that if you forget your password and push that helpful Forgot your password button that on any other site would send you an email to reset it like you would expect instead sends that email to an unknown place that is never your email. Something so basic and simple that every website is capable of managing or hiring an IT guy to fix if its a problem is impossible clearly for them. Its just very indicative I feel of how the entire operation is run.
@modoodles and all other parents of teenagers: I am so sorry. I have two friends who were high school teachers, but have moved into counselling. They could not be happier not to have to deal with teens anymore. So many kids who just expect things to be done for them and no consequences. I hope your teen turns herself around and everything calms down on your end.
@modoodles I'm with @stlbuckeye132 I'm terrified of the teenage years! Sounds like you are on top of it, but it must be such a shitty (and rage-inducing) feeling that your daughter has been dishonest. Ugh.
@blaf322 oh no cold calls. I used to work in politics so during election time (and fundraising time) it's all about cold calls (or knocking on people's doors on the weekend when normal people want to be left alone!) and while I got used to them, I never liked them! But if nothing else, it gives you sympathy for the other people who have to make them
My TWT is a "middle management" problem I suppose. On the one side, I'm quasi-managing a junior staff member who is highly competent and I like a lot, but who lately has been not all that invested in our shared work and as a result we're falling behind on some things. It's really impacted my trust in her and I've given her explicit directions that need to be followed and she doesn't follow-through, which is both frustrating from a work output standpoint and disappointing from the mentor-mentee side of our relationship. Her actual manager had a tough feedback conversation with her yesterday, so hopefully that plus the upcoming break (we're closed 12/21-1/1) will help her reset for the new year.
On the other side, our executive director cares a great deal about one of my workstreams, but there are two layers of management between us, so he's not super proximate to that or any other elements of my work. And he just decreed that this one workstream, which I had slated to be about 10% of my time in January, needs to be more like 75% of my time in January. And I'm frustrated because it makes me feel like he thinks I'm just over here twiddling my thumbs and not trying new things every week to reach our annual goals there (on which we're currently behind). Does he think I like feeling like I'm bad at my job? Of course I don't. But given that there are other really important things happening in January, I don't know where the time will come from. My boss suggested I delegate more things to her and the junior staff member above so that I can prioritize this stuff, but if I can't trust that the things will get done by my junior colleague and my boss is already overworked, I just feel like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place and I resent my ED for not learning more about the context before making these demands.
@meanjellybean it really does make it easy to empathize with the person on the other end of the line! I used to project manage for a IT focused marketing company and, while a big part of what we did was inbound marketing... the other side of it was the outbound cold calls. My callers made a MINIMUM of 110 calls per day (the successful ones made far more than that) and it's such a thankless job. I'm always uber polite to people who cc me at work and home because of it! They're just trying to feed their families lol
Fortunately, I'm not having to call people at home. I'm not sure I could!
@enchantindragon I was going to say that my TW is TW because twat waffle is such a disgusting term, I’ve never heard it anywhere else, and it seems unnecessarily alarming to use it in a same place where TW is used as an attempt to be sensitive to people’s feelings.
It seems kind of engrained in the bump culture, but I would love for the phrase to go away.
@Pascal86 I have never heard the term before either. I've always associated those letters as trigger warning but none of the comments above seemed to be what you normally see under trigger warning threads so I was lost. Its not my favorite word and I think it can be easily confused with trigger warning so maybe a better term could be found. Dodos is usually my go to for when I'm exasperated with things
I mean... it's not supposed to be a nice thing to say about someone lol.... this isn't a thread for talking about how someone gave you the warm and fuzzies lol
@blaf322 yeah, i understand that, it just kind of gives me c-word vibes, like just a not nice word to be using at all. Plus the confusion with trigger warnings.
That being said, I’m not losing sleep over it - continue twat waffling away if everyone else enjoys it!
@modoodles saaame I was going to reply again but was just thinking, I don't belong in this convo/am not the person's opinion they want to hear b/c none of these words bother me
**look away if the f bomb offends you** Also, this happened earlier this week.... DD (pretending to clean the tub while she was in there): It's fuckin wet! Me: we don't say potty words (that's what daycare calls them so I figured I'd be consistent) DD: but it's fuckin' wet so we have to say fuckin' wet ::face palm:: She was trying to say soakin' wet.... but got confused, I guess. We watch our language around her but we're definitely not perfect.
😂😂 @blaf322 we've had a few those moments too! One time when one of the kids was in preschool his teacher told me at lunch he dropped his spoon on the floor and loudly said, "damn!" She laughed and said, "well, he used it in the correct context.."
My current fave is that I have a 2.5 yo daycare kiddo that came in last week and said, "my dad said fuckin' bullshit but that's a naughty word." 😂 True.
I definitely don’t mind not nice words 😂 but am a firm believer in not using them towards or at another person. My husband agrees. So it’ll be interesting raising kids who will be told that Any not nice words should be used, ever 😂
@modoodles your daycare kid I would have died laughing. DD is mostly a rule follower/doesn't want to be in trouble... so I have a feeling this will be her only slip up for a while. FFWC- I'm not telling my mom that happened. She would DIE. Right there. She'd act like it was the actual end of the world and would definitely look at me with disappointed eyes lol
@blaf322 & @modoodles Thank you for those stories. It gave be a good silent laugh at my desk. My friends raised their kid not to repeat the swear words he heard from adults or he wouldn't be allowed to be around them. I assume this was after the repeating phase of early childhood.
@meri-mac my friend's daughter knows not to repeat things and always has (actually, I have a few friends with kids like that. So I'm hoping DD turns out that way too lol
Re: TW Tuesday
My daughter is a freshman and the end of the semester is on Friday. She's been telling me she stays after school to do schoolwork at least 3 days a week for the last month. If she doesnt do some type of massive turnaround by Friday she will fail 3 core classes. She is also involved in cheerleading, band, and a competition show choir, so she won't be eligible for those activities anymore either. We've been going over this stuff for so long, I just dont get it. Plus, part of her poor grades is due to not taking in class quizzes and tests. Apparently she just sits there while everyone else takes them and she doesnt do anything? I'm pretty much breathing fire 🔥🔥🔥 at her right now.
The quizzes and tests would pisssss me off! OMG! Like, wtf are you even doing with your life right now?! lol.... Will the teacher let her do those again? Also, do you think maybe she's not feeling confident in her ability and that's why she's just not taking them?
Ugh, teenagers! I am so sorry you are having to deal with this! I'm a high school teacher of mostly Seniors, and I see this kind of stuff ALL. THE. TIME. Freshmen are often the hardest since they are adjusting to high school life and don't often realize so much more of keeping on top of things is their responsibility. I send e-mails almost every single day to parents of kids who are just not doing their work. The whole sitting there and not even attempting tests/quizzes just baffles me. If it's multiple choice...guess! duh!
My TW was going to be my students, so it's pretty much the same as yours! I have one that owes me 2 tests and a quiz and didn't show up to his midterm today after going to his other midterm earlier in the morning. GAH. Now I'm trying to track his butt down.
ETA: Them turning off her computer use is SO COOL. Technology is great.
@enchantindragon TW is all about context. It can be trigger warning, but in this case it's twatwaffle, a technical term of course. It took me soooo long to figure out all the abbreviations on here last time haha
@modoodles and all other parents of teenagers: I am so sorry. I have two friends who were high school teachers, but have moved into counselling. They could not be happier not to have to deal with teens anymore. So many kids who just expect things to be done for them and no consequences. I hope your teen turns herself around and everything calms down on your end.
@blaf322 oh no cold calls. I used to work in politics so during election time (and fundraising time) it's all about cold calls (or knocking on people's doors on the weekend when normal people want to be left alone!) and while I got used to them, I never liked them! But if nothing else, it gives you sympathy for the other people who have to make them
On the other side, our executive director cares a great deal about one of my workstreams, but there are two layers of management between us, so he's not super proximate to that or any other elements of my work. And he just decreed that this one workstream, which I had slated to be about 10% of my time in January, needs to be more like 75% of my time in January. And I'm frustrated because it makes me feel like he thinks I'm just over here twiddling my thumbs and not trying new things every week to reach our annual goals there (on which we're currently behind). Does he think I like feeling like I'm bad at my job? Of course I don't. But given that there are other really important things happening in January, I don't know where the time will come from. My boss suggested I delegate more things to her and the junior staff member above so that I can prioritize this stuff, but if I can't trust that the things will get done by my junior colleague and my boss is already overworked, I just feel like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place and I resent my ED for not learning more about the context before making these demands.
TLDR get me to winter break stat
I used to project manage for a IT focused marketing company and, while a big part of what we did was inbound marketing... the other side of it was the outbound cold calls. My callers made a MINIMUM of 110 calls per day (the successful ones made far more than that) and it's such a thankless job. I'm always uber polite to people who cc me at work and home because of it! They're just trying to feed their families lol
Fortunately, I'm not having to call people at home. I'm not sure I could!
It seems kind of engrained in the bump culture, but I would love for the phrase to go away.
That being said, I’m not losing sleep over it - continue twat waffling away if everyone else enjoys it!
**look away if the f bomb offends you**
Also, this happened earlier this week....
DD (pretending to clean the tub while she was in there): It's fuckin wet!
Me: we don't say potty words (that's what daycare calls them so I figured I'd be consistent)
DD: but it's fuckin' wet so we have to say fuckin' wet
::face palm::
She was trying to say soakin' wet.... but got confused, I guess. We watch our language around her but we're definitely not perfect.
My current fave is that I have a 2.5 yo daycare kiddo that came in last week and said, "my dad said fuckin' bullshit but that's a naughty word." 😂 True.
DD is mostly a rule follower/doesn't want to be in trouble... so I have a feeling this will be her only slip up for a while.
FFWC- I'm not telling my mom that happened. She would DIE. Right there. She'd act like it was the actual end of the world and would definitely look at me with disappointed eyes lol