I am 40 years old and have had four C sections, the last being just 9 months ago. I was told by my doctor that I should not have anymore children as she described my uterine walls as "paper thin." The scar tissue, with adhesions to bowel and bladder and the abdominal wall have caused a massive, hard lump under my skin. I've had such a horrible time post partum with pain, cramping, and excessive bleeding that I started seeking a hysterectomy five months ago. My doctor was holding off until they straightened out my PCOS to see if that helped first. I had a diagnostic ultrasound this morning to get a better idea of my PCOS and found out I am 6 weeks and 2 days pregnant with... twins?!?! I am terrified. Absolutely terrified. How on earth would I be able to carry twins in this uterus? My last two babies were born early and small due to restricted growth in my uterus. I have so much going on in my head right now. I've had miscarriages before, it's early, how far could I possibly make it? The chances of me having two healthy babies has got to be practically impossible. My husband is thrilled and doesn't seem to understand my very rational fears here regarding two possible babies' health and my own. In fact, he called his mother who immediately posted that we were having twins all over her social media. I'm so upset. Nobody understands or respects my fears and my feelings. I feel even more pressure to produce two completely healthy babies. I feel very, very alone.
I’m really sorry you have so much stress over this. It does sound like a scary situation. What has your doctor said? Can you get referred to MFM/high risk doctor ASAP? I would suggest lining up a therapist to try to sort out your feelings with this and to help cope with whatever comes. I hope your family realizes how scared you are and is more respectful going forward.
You need to get to a high risk OB right away. And your DH needs to be with you so he can start to understand the real risks and why you are so scared, which is perfectly valid. Twin pregnancies are hard enough (my first was twins) and it sounds like you have several other factors that would make it even harder. I agree with PP about getting a therapist to help you deal with things. You may require bed rest at some point and that can be mentally difficult. I was on bed rest for just 3 weeks with my twins and thought I'd go bonkers. Just take it as easy as possible. I'm sure that's easier said than done with 4 kids! Don't start thinking about how far you can make it yet. That will overwhelm you. Small goals, one day and one week at a time. There are a lot of very supportive ladies on these boards. Introduce yourself to your month board and give and get support. Sending tons of good vibes and prayers your way.
Agree with PP, you need to get a referral to a high risk OB right away and your husband needs to go there with you to hear about the risks. I would be IRATE if my husband told his mother we were due with twins when i was only 6 weeks along, especially if i had a history of MC and was high risk, and especially especially since she can't seem to keep information to herself and is splashing it all over social media. If she's so happy about it, perhaps she can move in with you and care for your other 4 babies when you go on bedrest (which is a real possibility given your history).
You should definitely see a therapist as well, and possibly a couples counsellor to deal with your husband's inability to both keep information private between the two of you and to understand how difficult this pregnancy is going to be. And to understand how difficult it will be to raise 6 kids assuming everything works out for the best. I truly cannot imagine how hard that would be.
Please reach out to your BMB; the ladies there can provide more appropriate support than your husband is currently providing. Good luck.
Re: Twins after 4 C Sections??
Just take it as easy as possible. I'm sure that's easier said than done with 4 kids! Don't start thinking about how far you can make it yet. That will overwhelm you. Small goals, one day and one week at a time.
There are a lot of very supportive ladies on these boards. Introduce yourself to your month board and give and get support. Sending tons of good vibes and prayers your way.
You should definitely see a therapist as well, and possibly a couples counsellor to deal with your husband's inability to both keep information private between the two of you and to understand how difficult this pregnancy is going to be. And to understand how difficult it will be to raise 6 kids assuming everything works out for the best. I truly cannot imagine how hard that would be.
Please reach out to your BMB; the ladies there can provide more appropriate support than your husband is currently providing. Good luck.