Product Spotlight: Pregnancy Books

m6agua

Product Spotlight! We'll do "non-registry" items to start us off. 

Each week we'll spotlight a new category of product. Feel free to comment on these threads throughout your time at the board, not just during its week in the spotlight, if you discover something new OR are new to the board. This week we're talking.... Pregnancy Books!

FTMs are encouraged to ask questions & STM/+s encouraged to share their knowledge based on experience. You can use any or all the prompts relevant to you below to share info in an easy-to-read format. Pictures/screen grabs, if put in spoilers, are welcome!

https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1XX4aUSPsDbdyEEK5HIzMzwH2ztOVOnNCehSgMAc5w6U/edit?usp=sharing

For all...

• What book/s on pregnancy/motherhood/maternity/parenting do you own/have you read?
• What about that the book/s drew you to it/them?
• What would you like to share about those you've read/started to read?
• Any books on your radar that you don't own yet that you're hoping to get your hands on? Why?

For STMs/STM+s...

• Is there ONE pregnancy/motherhood/maternity/parenting book you'd recommend---if so, which? 
• Any books you recommend avoiding/why?

m6agua

Last time around I read What to Expect When Your Expecting and it was great! The Ovia app was my favorite out of all the ones I tried.

Is there ONE book you'd recommend---if so, which?
Sorry, I cannot do only one recommendation.

The Wonder Weeks, I highly recommend the book and the app for once baby is here. It helped me not lose my shit so many times when I could not figure out what my child needed.
https://www.thewonderweeks.com/

I also recommend Heathy Sleep Habits, Happy Child book for sleep, my friend loaned it to me and it helped me a ton!
https://www.amazon.com/Healthy-Sleep-Habits-Happy-Child/dp/B007NBBLZM/ref=asc_df_B007NBBLZM/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=312142103956&hvpos=1o1&hvnetw=g&hvrand=3271943463473813003&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=1016418&hvtargid=pla-584125314676&psc=1

Other than books, I LOVE The Birth Hour Podcast, so many women and their different birth experiences. Each episode they talk about resources that they liked and there is always a product sponsor spotlight.

catem07

Oh I STAN Emily Oster and Expecting Better. I encourage everyone to read it. It breaks down all the "rules" about pregnancy by analyzing the studies that inspired them. If you are data-driven, read it. 

For dads, my husband liked The Expectant Father and it wasn't what I call a "dude-bro-you're-gonna-be-a-dad" book. 

rachelg777

I second Expecting Better by Emily Oster. She also came out with a parenting book - Cribsheet: A Data-Driven Guide to Better, More Relaxed Parenting, from Birth to Preschool- which I also liked. 

mdfarmchick

As far as parenting books, I recommend No Bad Kids and Elevating Childcare by Janet Lansbury. No Bad Kids is one I wish I had read earlier with my first and I have reread many times since then. 

adventuresawait1

What To Expect was super helpful the last time around (my sister got me a Mayo Clinic book that was a lot less helpful!) Once baby is born, highly recommend Baby 411. It sums up a lot of info in a helpful format. I also have really liked The Sleep Lady book for sleeping info once they get a bit older. Here’s The Plan was helpful for planning pumping and work stuff once baby was born. Your Self-Confident Baby was also a good one in terms of introducing a way to think about how to interact with babies (even if we didn’t always go with it). 

remarkable2018

After checking with my OB/GYN before we started trying, I got out my mom’s old copy of “What to Expect” from when she was pregnant with my sister in 2002 😂 I’d also picked up a copy of Natural Child Birth the Bradley Way at a cheap book sale fundraiser a long time ago because the method has always intrigued me. 

I’ve also ordered Ina May’s Guide to ChildBirth - Looking forward to adding Expecting Better to the list, too. 

miss_lynn9

I love Real Food for Pregnancy by lily nichols. I've always been fascinated by food and how it affects our body. This book is packed with information and has a lot of data to back it. Definitely recommend. 

I'm also really enjoying Mama Natural Week to week guide to pregnancy and childbirth. 

Does anyone have recommendations on books for exercise? 

lajoliedreamer

Another big recommendation for Expecting Better by Emily Oster. I am a person who wants to have the data and make the best decision for me based on that data which is exactly what this book does for a lot of things. My only complaint is that she breezed over the last trimester/delivery and there is definitely data she could have pulled. 

H and I did the Bradley Method classes when pg with DD and also recommend that to any expecting parents. I plan to pull out the course workbook to refresh soon - Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way by Susan McCutcheon. (ETA: this is a class with a high emphasis on husband-coached birth, but can be applied to any birth partner.)

@jess09lynn - not a book, but I just came across this for pregnancy exercise: https://furthermore.equinox.com/articles/2017/05/pregnancy-workout

pirateduck

I am keeping this list saved up.  I have a copy of What to Expect when You are Expecting, which I look at from time to time and is very informative.  I also have a baby name book that my dog has eaten the last part of the boys' names in the alphabet.  So I guess we'd better have a girl.  I will be downloading some new reading material soon so I hope I enjoy these books as well.

jhysmath

@m6agua I love the Birth Hour Podcast!!! I listened to it for like 3 years before getting pregnant, I haven't found the time to listen these days as children's music tends to dominate my alexa device while I make dinner now. 

I'll admit most of these I listened to instead of read, but audiobooks were my life when driving prebaby.

Expecting better was pretty informative. 

Ina May books (breastfeeding and guide to childbirth) was very good, there are a lot of anecdotal stories in them which I prefer in a book. If you plan on breastfeeding I highly recommend her book, I found I learned more from that book than I did from my breastfeeding class at the hospital. 

The Dawn Dais books "Shit no one tells you" adds a lot of comedy to everything you're reading and sometime you just need to laugh.

Orgasmic Birth is again mostly stories which I enjoyed. 

The baby book by Dr Sears is probably better written, the audiobook for it sucked, it referenced charts and things like that and just wasn't a good format.

Bringing up Bebe is a good one to look at american/french child rearing and their differences.  

m6agua

@jess09lynn Here is the PS with recommendations for books. Like I posted above, I liked this book for baby sleep. Heathy Sleep Habits, Happy Child
https://www.amazon.com/Healthy-Sleep-Habits-Happy-Child/dp/B007NBBLZM/ref=asc_df_B007NBBLZM/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=312142103956&hvpos=1o1&hvnetw=g&hvrand=3271943463473813003&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=1016418&hvtargid=pla-584125314676&psc=1

miss_lynn9

@m6agua thank you! I remember seeing this I could not find it though. 

pirateduck

Does anyone have any good reading about introducing babies and pets?  I'm a little nervous about bringing home baby and training the one dog (likes to herd children, tends to get jealous) and the one cat (wants to claw out the eyes of all living things).  I'm thinking of reaching out to my trainer, but would love to find some things we can work on now to help with the transition.

ruby696

@pirateduck I don't have a book, but introduced two great Danes and a senior doberman mix to two babies so far. The main tips I have would be to kick dogs off the furniture/bed now if you allow that. Besides the risk of the dog jumping up and accidentally landing on baby, there's a hierarchy to where dogs sleep and your dog needs to be below the baby. Also, try to feed the dog after you and baby are fed for the same reason. We didn't do the blanket intro because I was told the dog would think the blanket/smell belongs to them or is something they can play with. We made sure to give the dogs plenty of love and attention, but always after baby so the dogs learned their new place in the pack.

It went pretty smoothly, although my Dobie mix has a high prey drive and had the same reaction to my newborn as he would to a squirrel. He had to be watched very closely for the first year.

If you can swing a trainer, that's fantastic.

pirateduck

Thank you @ruby696.  Mine has the prey/herding instincts, but I've trained her not to touch the cats (even when brought home as tiny kittens) and she will not touch my chickens and ducks.  She respects that I'm the boss and that these things are mine and not hers.  No dogs on the furniture and we have a strict time for feeding, so hopefully that helps.  I'm also thinking forward to coming home from the hospital and I think I need to greet the critters first, without baby, because they will be soooo excited to have us home.  Good advice about the order of things, attention to baby then dog, food to baby then dog, somehow making baby outrank dog.  Soon enough the baby will be viewed as a treat dispenser, just gotta get by until then.  Maybe we need an entire baby and pet intro. thread.

ruby696

@pirateduck I know this isn't always a popular opinion and pets can be a hot topic, but I really tried to keep my dogs separated from my babies for a while. As an attorney, I've seen too many kids with dog bites from family dogs. Babies can be stressful for dogs and it just wasn't worth the risk to me. We were comfortable with our submissive Dane pretty quickly. The more dominant one took longer, but only because of her size and excitement levels - she adores our kids. The Dobie mix took the longest, partially because of his high prey drive and partially because he's old and has low tolerance for bs. He grew up with cats and was fine with them, so I was a little surprised that he wasn't a fan of the babies. Depending on the size and personality of your dog, you'll get a good feel for things pretty quickly. 

pirateduck

Yeah...  I think supervision is key.  @ruby696 I think people are sometimes too quick to assume that everything is ok and everyone can plan nice, however, all it takes is either the child or the dog to make a movement or noise that set's the other on edge.  They don't know how to read each other's body language.  You or I could probably look at our dogs and know if they feel uncomfortable or tense in a situation, but a baby doesn't get those body language cues.

ruby696

Totally agree @pirateduck. My kids have been tail whipped in the face before and when a Great Dane smacks you with its tail, it hurts. My dogs weren't being aggressive and they weren't doing anything wrong. Accidents can still happen and they aren't always the result of aggression. Plus, dogs have to learn that babies are part of the pack before they become loyal to them. Some dogs adapt really quickly and others take time.

remarkable2018

I have another book to add to the recommendations! I am a self proclaimed planner anyways, but I've been struggling for months to find a book that helped with planning for pregnancy and baby. My sweet husband found this book for me and gave it to me at Christmas - I love the layout and wish I'd had it earlier. 

Mother of All Pregnancy Organizers: https//www.amazon.com/Mother-All-Pregnancy-Organizers/dp/1620458330/ref=sr_1_2?keywords=the+mother+of+all+pregnancy+organizers&qid=1577810907&sr=8-2

It has spaces to record each week's symptoms, changes, questions... So it makes for a great memento for our babes who might ask some day what things were like. There are check lists for registries, spaces to record baby shower gifts, store contact information for healthcare providers and people who have volunteered to help you out. For my planning and organization loving heart - I love the book! It looks a bit dated, but I'm so glad to have it. 

shamrocandroll

@pirateduck @ruby696 Our old dog never got to the point where I trusted him to be around DS unattended.  The dog was anxious and reactive when cornered.  It sucked because he had separation anxiety and always wanted to be around me, but once DS was mobile, I kept them supervised or separated at all times.  We had one incident of the dog grabbing a granola bar out of DS's hand and nipping him a bit in the process, and DS never let go of the snack thieving grudge.    He was 13.5 when we lost him, and we miss him dearly, but it's soooo much less stressful not having to worry about him constantly.  On the flip side of that, our goldendoodle is so amazing with him, but I still have to keep an eye on them when they're together.  Sometimes DS loves her a little too aggressively, and she would literally let him strangle her to death without so much as a whimper, so I have to monitor their play times.  Also, he ended up in the ER with a concussion last year because they were playing/dancing and she knocked him over in the excitement and he hit his head on the floor.  So even if the dog isn't remotely aggressive, you still need to keep an eye on them pretty much at all times!  

*typo

ruby696

@shamrocandroll I feel the same way about my Dobie mix. He turns 17 on the 11th and I adore him. But he has a low bs tolerance at this point and I've always been super careful of him around the kids. I will be devastated when he's no longer with us, but relieved too. Size is more the problem with our Danes. They can knock the kids over pretty easily if they're not paying attention. And one is deaf, so if she doesn't see the kids, she could turn into them and knock them down. It's not a matter of bad behavior, she can't help it. She's turning 10 tomorrow and my other Dane is 7. I think we'll be dog free for a few years when they pass.

shamrocandroll

@ruby696 Wow, 17!  That's incredible!  And omg I looove big dogs like danes, but hate that they have such short average life spans.  Sounds like your pups are super well cared for since they're all so mature in age for their breeds!    

pirateduck

@ruby696 17!  Wow.  That's all I can say.  My old dog is on the way, she will be 15 around the time baby is born.  She was diagnosed with terminal cancer a year and a half ago, we were told she likely wouldn't live through the summer and chose to just manage pain and not put her through surgery/chemo which might not stop it anyway.  I was convinced the end was near.  Now it's a year and a half later and she seems totally normal for a dog of her age, so apparently she's decided she is going to live forever.  She has arthritis, as most old dogs do, and doesn't like if people get too close to her sore spots (doesn't matter who it is or if it's intentional or not).  So I'll definitely have to watch her when baby is mobile, but she is generally a gentle sweetheart old lady golden retriever, but yeah, I need to keep her safe more than I need to keep baby safe from her.  Also if bumped into my dog can fall, especially on stairs or on slippery floors, again, arthritis.

ruby696

@shamrocandroll and @pirateduck We joke that he's immortal and that DS is going to take him to college. Actually though, he's really slowed down and lost a lot of weight. I know his kidneys aren't doing great, but he's still so happy and loving (and plays with his toys), so we're not making any decisions at this point. Once he stops eating, well know it's time. We actually got our 2nd Dane because our Dobie mix was 11 and we didn't want our first Dane to be alone. So yeah, we've unexpectedly had three dogs dogs for 5 years now. 😬 But they are a major part of our family and we love them dearly. MH brings the youngest Dane to work with him regularly. They're all pretty spoiled.