UO Thursday 7.25

stassischroeder

 

Let's see if we can make this more exciting than food preferences 

silverhope

I wish people would keep it to themselves that they got pregnant on the first try. I know the people who say these mean no harm by it, but I still get annoyed whenever someone tells me this. 

projectalice

....Just how exciting do you want this? Lol

RanFan28

My UO is that I’m very hesitant to post my UOs because I’m my last BMB, people were mean and thrived on the drama and I’m really just hear for PGAL support. I’m our culture, people aren’t allowed to have differing opinions and I don’t have any desire to be mean or defend myself to internet strangers. 

stassischroeder

@silverhope totally agree. I've been on both sides of the fence, but I still get irritated when that information is offered up unsolicited. (although now I'm worried and want to go back and check my intro post    )

@projectalice I've been around TB too long to not hope for some excitement!

@RanFan28 I can understand that. I'm not ashamed to admit that I like a little bit of drama on the board, but it's not for everyone. You're more than welcome to keep any opinions to yourself and stick to the posts/parts that suit you best Do you mind me asking what culture you're referring to? If you'd rather not share, or would rather PM me, that's totally fine too. 

kantobean

Ok. My UO is I think it’s totally unnecessary to shower daily. Every other day is perfectly fine.

I think it’s fine if you prefer to shower daily (H does) but I just personally don’t. 

RanFan28

@kantobean That is not unpopular over here! I definitely don’t shower everyday. 

@stassischroeder I just mean American culture in general.

stassischroeder

@kantobean As long as I'm not sweating like crazy at any point, I totally agree. Right now I shower every other day, but only wash my hair 2x per week. I'd love to be able to figure out how to wash my hair even less than that, but no luck yet. Even with dry shampoo I start to look homeless after more than 3 days. 

varimama

@silverhope yea I don’t need to know if someone got KU on accident or first try. Honestly I don’t really need to know at all unless someone with IF might want to share that it’s been a long hard journey for them

@kantobean I prefer to shower daily but agree it’s not necessary. I only wash my hair like 1-2 times a week though. 

My UO is I honestly don’t like leaving DS. I’ll do it once in a while for short times but I prefer to have him with me/(us if DH is with us). I don’t really need much more of a break than DH watching him for 30 min while I do yoga or read. We do family friendly things now and I have no problem turning down invites to non child friendly activities or times. DH and I have dates in after DS is in bed. 

bluguitarhannah

Overuse of the word hoax on national television makes you look silly.  Occasionally, it must make you spit accidently on the microphone.

treetop19

@silverhope, I hear ya.. as a loss mom, it can be especially difficult to hear how 'easy' other people have it. though I've had that happen to me once in my life (the first try thing).. it eventually turned out to be a loss.  I don't mind when people say it so much as, the bragging aspect of it.  Like oh look at me, I'm so fertile and awesome, I don't even have to try.  

My UO.. pregnant women who have to constantly remind everyone of their pregnant state.  As in, they won't stop talking about it, and trying to put themselves in the center of everyone's attention at work, in family gatherings, ect.  I get it, you're pregnant, now please let everyone else live their lives in peace. 

kagesstarshroom

@stassisschroeder I brush and wash my hair like... once every 1.5-2 weeks? My tricks? It's VERY LONG and I keep it UP all the time. It's a pain to brush out, but it's never super dirty (unless I go longer than 2 weeks...)

miss.sally

I’m amazed at all of y’all and your hair washing schedules. Like super jealous. If I don’t wash my hair every day I look homeless and greasy and gross. 

Also agree with people bragging about getting KU super fast. I had a friend joke to me about how she was soooooo fertile within a week of me having my second miscarriage. And after two years of infertility.  

My UO is that I super don’t like video games. Unless it involves Mario and Princess Peach, count me out! (And even then I haven’t played since I was in middle school). Cannot for the life of me understand how people can spend hours and hours on the computer/tv. 

orbmaker

Not trying to shame anyone, but I wonder if there’s a better way to talk about the dangers of not washing your hair without using “homeless” as a pejorative. I work with a lot of un-housed people and, yanno, it’s a truly difficult situation to find yourself in.

projectalice

I agree with you @RanFan28. I haven't posted any UO yet because right now this board is nice and supportive, and it's a pleasant atmosphere. Especially being pgal it's rather nice. 
If I post any truly unpopular opinions I feel the atmosphere will change, and I can go all sorts of other places online for judgement and drama. Kinda nice to have a place right now where there isn't. 

varimama

@miss.sally I used to be the same with hair but it’s because your hair gets used to it and then needs washed every day. Shampoo strips your hair of your natural oils so your head ends up making more to compensate causing greasy hair in a day. My mom always made me wash it every day as a kid so I thought I had to. Finally in college a hair dresser explained to me how it works. I started by going every other day and using dry shampoo the day I didn’t wash. Eventually I was noticing I didn’t need the dry shampoo so I added in another day and used dry shampoo that day. Now if I wash it twice a week I don’t need dry shampoo. If I go a full week I need a day or two of dry shampoo 

miss.sally

@varimama that’s amazing. Maybe I’ll try doing that. I do have some dry shampoo that I love. 

EmilyLove25

@varimama 100% agree re: wanting to be with my kids. I guess I can add to that that my UO is that I'm astonished at how easily people can leave their very small children for weekends (if not longer) on a REGULAR basis for a "girls' weekend" or "romantic getaways with DH." I try not to judge because everyone is different, but I'm like... you know these kids are going to grow up, right? 

@RanFan28 I like to believe we'd all handle differing opinions somewhat well? I think as long as you don't say, "OMG you are a TOTAL IDIOT FOR THINKING THAT." I'm super political and opinionated, but I have close friends from my BMB with DS who, gasp, voted for Trump... and well, to say I didn't is an understatement hahahaha.

lm45678

On leaving kids:
I’ve left DD for a lot of weekends because I’ve literally had over 30 weddings since we got married 5 years ago. When I was breastfeeding I would bring her and my parents with me so that she was close, but once she was weaned? I enjoyed the weekend away with all my friends kid free. Plus she was having a great time hone with my parents! It seemed way more fair for her to stay home while I traveled. It’s never easy to leave her, but for a weekend it’s kind of nice and I feel totally refreshed.

On the flip side, when she was 11 months and I was still breastfeeding I was in a wedding in Paris and i had to be gone for 5 days. It was pure torture for me. Legitimately almost has a mental breakdown about leaving her. So i guess 2-3 days was my threshold? Haha

On hair:
Thats really interesting about what your hair thinks it needs. I wash my hot everyday, sometimes I will skip Sunday if I don’t do anything. My hair is super thin and gets very greasy veryyyy quickly.

kantobean

Dang, I feel really ok leaving my kid sometimes. I’ve had to leave her for overnights for work at least half a dozen times, and H stays with her. H and I have done one getaway together and each of us has taken a weekend or two to spend with friends. She loves time with her grandparents. I always miss her of course but these are short trips.

Everyone is different but life is too short for me to feel guilty over a weekend away once in a while.

EmilyLove25

@kantobean Oh yes, I don't think anyone should feel guilty regardless of what they do. I just literally don't enjoy being away. DH does. He travels for work AND would love it if I would go on vacations with just him, but, ehhh... just not for me (now). 

kantobean

@EmilyLove25 I gotcha. We have only been together twice, once for one night and once for two nights. I hope to do another weekend away before this baby, but we’ll see. You have to do what feels right! My parents were begging us to leave her overnight sooner but I could not do it before she was 18 months. Everybody is different and we are lucky to have 3 sets of grandparents in town who can all babysit competently.

stassischroeder

@orbmaker thanks for that perspective! 

@kantobean @EmilyLove25 @varimama I didn't leave DS overnight until he was 14 months old, and that was just overnight for a work conference. And he was with DH. I really enjoy my time away from him, but I also get sad if I feel like I'm missing anything. I also have a hard time trusting anyone else to watch him aside from DH (and obviously daycare), so that makes taking time away more difficult. We don't live in the same state as my family, and I don't trust most of DH's family to watch him for extended periods of time. My MIL likes to throw DS's schedule and norms out the window and it makes me want to strangle her. 

@EmilyLove25 @RanFan28 I think EmilyLove has brought up a great point - different opinions doesn't have to mean an immature, degrading, name-calling situation. I guess I spent enough time in TTGP, my previous BMB, and other places to understand that usually these threads can be chalked full of UOs and still remain respectful, yet interesting. Although, I'm also hyper-aware of bump culture and the hot topics that are guaranteed to result in a brawl lol. Having said all of that, BMBs that are all butterflies and unicorns make me gag