August 2019 Moms

Weight Gain

I see a team of OBs and the last doctor I saw (for the first time) was SO harsh about my weight gain thus far and it has really gotten to me. I have been trying to be mindful of my weight gain throughout this entire process and still walk on the treadmill for at least 30 minutes 4-5 days a week (currently 34 weeks pregnant) but I have still gained 32lbs to date.

She said being "overweight when I got pregnant" I should only gain 15 - 20 lbs total based on my "bmi", at this rate I'll gain well over 40 lbs by the end of this pregnancy and I need to "stop carbloading and eat salads" . (Like all "overweight people" do is carbload...Facepalm!) 
Note: bloodpressure, heart rate, etc are and have been all normal! Baby girl is in the 61st percentile but not "overly large" so she never mentioned she is concerned about the babies well being because of the weight gain. 

I know every body, baby, & pregnancy is different but I am curious what everyone has gained thus far, if you don't mind sharing. My husband said womens mental health is just as important throughout this process as your physical health and I cant let her harsh words get me down but I am still wondering what is a realistic "weight gain"?

Re: Weight Gain

  • Maybe ask her what the concern is-- e.g. how she sees the weight affecting your health.

    I don't know how much it will help your mental health to poll a bunch of strangers, but that's for you to decide. I've gained about 25 pounds. I'm 33 weeks and I started at a "normal" BMI. I'm 5'8 and went from upper 120's to now 150's and will probably hit 160's before the end. My doctor hasn't said anything about my weight one way or the other. 


  • @Knottie1464835857 - I agree with @law_and_little1 in that maybe a more in-depth conversation needs to be had. Throwing a number at someone without explanation is just a number and - from what I gather from secondhand experiences and my own experiences - everybody gains/carries differently, regardless of your starting point.

    I'm no doctor, but even if you do hit the 40 or 45 lb mark, it should not be cause for saying such things - especially with zero explanation. I only gained 20 with my first (I started out a little heavy, around 27.5 BMI), but I left the hospital 35 lbs lighter ... and she was only 6-1/2 lbs. There's a lot of blood, fluid, and placenta that makes up that weight. I could maybe understand her (blunt) point if there were blood pressure issues or if you were having excess fluid retention, but you said that wasn't an issue.

    See if you can get her to have the talk with you because it's just as important for her to track your progress as it is for her to explain what is going on with you during this time. Just telling you that you're overdoing it isn't good bedside manner at all.
    **History in Spoiler**
    Me-35, DH-36 - TTC since 08/10
    Me - anovulatory, non-Insulin PCOS, DH - low end of "normal" sperm count
       IUI#1   - 02/15 - Cancelled due to scrubbed sperm count <1MM
       IVF#1  - 08/15 - 13x5-day blastocysts (ranging from AA-BB, most are 5 or 6), not PGS, on ice
       FET#1 - 10/15 - 1 emb - BFP (DD 07/16) (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#2 - 07/17 - 1 emb - BFN (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#3 - 08/17 - 1 emb - BFN (estrace + PIO sesame oil + prometrium)
       FET#4 - 10/17 - 2 emb - BFN (changed to estrace + prometrium because of allergic reaction to PIO sesame oil)
    ERA Testing - 12/17 - window moved (-1 day)
       FET#5 - 03/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
    Karyotype Testing - 04/18 - Negative (we're ok)
       FET#6 - 06/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
       FET#7 - 10/18 - 2 emb - BFN (estrace + prometrium, ERA-timing used)
       FET#8 - 11/18 - 2 emb - BFP; looks like one baby is going to make it, DD is due 8/16 (though likely to be 8/9)


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  • I would say im fat. My 1st pregnancy i gained 50 lbs, my second 50 lbs. This one actually only 25lbs (gestational diabetes this time round) so major diet changes. No doctor has ever scolded me for weight gain. 
  • My BMI was overweight going into this pregnancy and I’ve gained 30 lbs. I asked my dr several weeks ago if my weight was ok and he said I was doing good. I wish I would’ve lost weight before being pregnant but I’m learning to love my prego body and focus on being healthy and having a positive body image to model for my daughter. 
  • I'm a petite person naturally and with my first I gained 30 lbs total. This time I've gained about 25 lbs so far and I'm only 32 weeks. I know I'll gain more than 5lbs in the next two months. I had a pulmonology appointment back in April for my asthma and the nurse checking me in said, "you've put on some weight." like I needed to provide an explanation beyond the fact that I'm growing another human life. Each pregnancy and woman is different! You are doing great. I'd ask one of the other OBs at your next visit about it if it bothers you, though. I know how comments like that can really get under your skin!
  • I'm sorry that, especially without a health issue, they are making a big deal of it. Like some of the above responses mentioned, I'd somewhat understand if there was blood pressure issues or other medically relevant issues to you or your baby, but since there's not, I don't see the need to act in that way. I'm sorry- I know that going through these changes has had a lot of ups and downs for me and how I view my body, too!
  • My doctor has never said anything negative about my weight gain. When I asked about it they said not to worry about it and I was growing a human lol. I feel like that is rude for your doctor to have said that without a really good reason behind it. Every person and body is different. I have gained more than my SIL at 34 weeks than she did with all of hers at 40 weeks. And pre-pregnancy we are about the exact same body build. Oh well I am not concerned about it. I will exercise or do what it takes afterwards to lose my extra baby fat. 
  • I have gd and am insulin dependent. Lost 13lbs in the first tri and am 33 weeks just now gained that back. So I guess I haven’t really gained anything! The doctors don’t seem too concerned since our little guy is doing good! Everyone is different!
  • I gained a huge amount of weight, without trying. I did everything right. I used the elliptical and rode horses until 5 months pregnant. Then I switched to walking/hiking (daily) and swimming. Granola in the AM, salads (no cheese, lean meats), lots of veggies, snacks fruit only, and a healthy dinner. All my portions were small (I have had no appetite in this pregnancy). Never had cravings. Regardless, I have gained 45lbs. No one believes I have gained that much, things are a little thicker, but nothing crazy, it's all belly. I am due in a week.

    I really stressed over it at first, but then I realized that was my body. My Mom gained tons of weight for her pregnancies and she was running the entire time. She also lost it all within 6 weeks post labor.
    .
  • I was pregnant with twins, which came 7 weeks early, but I only gained 20 pounds. However, I started out very overweight prior to being pregnant. I do have good news for you though, when I left the hospital 5 days after giving birth, I was about 5 pounds under my prepregnancy weight. So, don't worry, you will be able to get it off.
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