Trying to Get Pregnant

TTCAL w/o 7/1/19

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Re: TTCAL w/o 7/1/19

  • @emeraldduchess I am so very sorry to see you back here.  :'(
    Me: 37 | H: 44
    **TW**
    TTC #1: May 2015
    IF DX January 2016- Me: Right sided hydrosalpinx 
    Right tube removed: February 2016
    Acupuncture + TCM: March 2016
    BFP: July 4, 2016 | DS: March 2017 (39w 2d)
    TTC #2: April 2019
    BFP #2: April 2019 | CP: April 30, 2019 (4w 2d)
    BFP #3: July 15, 2019
    EDD: March 23, 2020



  • @ejoseph16 OMG Dr. Google is the worst. I spent way too much time with him this week. 
    @mokay19 I'm glad you had a wonderful trip to Europe but I totally get all the should-be feelings. And women who act like divas when they are KU are annoying as hell. 
    @shamrocandroll I am so sorry for everything that your family has been going through. Losing a loved one under those circumstances is so, so hard. Hugs to you. I really hope that your H's cousin's family finds comfort. 
    @maserrano714 I'm sorry. Announcements are gut punches no matter what. We definitely find the balance of "happy for you/sad for me". Doesn't mean it gets easier though. 
    @kagesstarshroom oof to that whole wedding crasher/sex reveal cake thing at the wedding. That seems very over-the-top and would have made me cry, too. 
    @mhamik I'm glad that you have a lot of fun stuff coming up to be a bit of a distraction. 
    @hanshotfirst77 I am so sorry about how drawn out this m/c has been. I'm glad the most recent procedure seems to have gone well and you can move forward. Still sending lots of hugs to you. 💜
    @NYTino24 when I got my rhogam shot they gave me a choice so I obviously picked my arm. After having a transvaginal ultrasound an hour before I was not going to take my pants off again if I could help it! They told me I didn't need it this time because it was so early. And why the hell did everyone suggest swimming as a way to take your mind off things? The last thing I would want to do is put on a bathing suit when I already feel like crap. 
    @ruby696 thank you, friend. 💜 It really is so unfair. I am going to ask about progesterone levels when I go for labs on Friday. I really feel like that's a factor in both my losses. 
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  • @puppylove8910 thank you. Like I said before, I am really grateful that I have you ladies. 💚
  • @emeraldduchess I'm so sorry to see you back here. Sending you hugs.
  • NYTino24NYTino24 member
    edited July 2019
    @emeraldduchess I’m sorry you’re back so soon. I’m with you on hating when people try to bring religion into it. 
    @hanshotfirst77 I hope they got it all and now you can move on.

    AFM, my anxiety is back and BAD. I’m having trouble breathing again (like not full blown panic attack or something noticeable to others, but it’s making me so tired and I can’t stop yawning and trying to catch my breath) and asked a nurse friend who I saw at a birthday party yesterday if she knew someone I could talk to since she had a third trimester loss. I am okay with my whole loss situation and trying again, but the anxiety of actually being pregnant and waiting to see what will happen is so hard. Plus I’m really worried what my RE testing might show with AMH and estrogen. Whatever it is, I hope it’s a workable situation...
    It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*

    Me: 36 DH 35 
    TTC  9/2016     BFP 12/9/16    EDD 8/21/17    NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
    TTC  2/2017  BFP 3/6/17   EDD 11/17/17   DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
    TTC 12/2018   BFP 6/2/19   EDD 2/12/20  NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
    TTC 7/2019   BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
    TTC 8/19    IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone  BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
    IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20

    AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
  • @NYTino24 I am so sorry you're struggling with anxiety. I live with it too and it can be such a beast. I'm feeling it too awaiting my test results.  That combined with my age has me terrified that we waited too long. So many hugs to you. 💜 I hope you can find someone to talk to. 

  • @NYTino24 I am sorry you are struggling. I have very similar feelings and fears. After my first loss I was like okay I guess this is bad luck. But I wasn't as affected as this second loss has been. Granted this one has been much more physically draining. But I am much more fearful now that it's happened twice in a row. Sending you big hugs! I hope you are able to work through this.

    TTC#1 - March 2013

    BFP 8/9/13 - EDD 4/14/14 - DS born 4/23/14

    TTC#2 November 2015

    Dx: Secondary IF June 2016

    Medicated IUI cycle#1- Clomid+IUI -1/15/17 -BFN

    Break Mid 2017 - Resumed TTC December 2018

    "She believed she could so she did..."

    Medicated IUI cycle#2- Femara 5mg+IUI 12/22/18 - BFP 1/4/19 - MMC 2/1/19

    Saline Sono 3/15/19 - All Clear!

    Medicated IUI cycle#3- Femara 7.5mg+IUI 3/28/19-BFN

    Medicated IUI cycle#4- Femara 5mg+Gonal F 50iu+IUI 4/27/19- BFP 5/11/19 - MMC 6/12/19 - D&C 6/14/19-

    Incomplete M/C Repeat D&C - 7/3/19 -Testing concluded baby was genetically normal  :'(

    Dx: Unexplained RPL July 2019 - Tested + as carrier for Usher Syndrome & Familial Mediterranean Fever 

    Saline Sono 8/7/19 - Mostly Clear! All systems go for IVF#1 

    But will need a repeat Saline Sono between ER and FET

    IVF #1 - Antagonist Protocol - 8/17/19

    ER#1 8/27/19 - 12R, 6F, 4 biopsied+frozen! (3d5blasts + 1d6blast)- 2 PGS normal embabies!

    Saline Sono 9/13/19 - All Clear! Onto FET Prep#1

    FET#1 - 4AA -10/4/19 - BFP 10/14/19 - EDD - 6/21/20 -Beta#1-10dp5dt- 379 Beta#2-12dp5dt- 1007 Beta#3-14dp5dt- 2844

    DD born 6/15/20  <3

  • @hanshotfirst77 I definitely feel like after a loss, you're robbed of a lot of joy for future pregnancies and I absolutely hate that. I didn't feel joy when I saw a positive test this time, just fear and doubt.  So unfair. 
    I want to get KU again as soon as possible, but I don't know if I can mentally go through this again. 
  • @emeraldduchess I completely agree. Instead of joy, a bfp brings lots of anxiety and fear. After two in a row now I feel like it's just waiting for the other shoe to drop. And being unexplained makes me even more anxious. Like there isn't even a reason for it, so I can't do anything to prevent it. Just rolling the dice and hoping for a miracle. But I definitely have feelings sometimes like how many times can I put myself through this.

    TTC#1 - March 2013

    BFP 8/9/13 - EDD 4/14/14 - DS born 4/23/14

    TTC#2 November 2015

    Dx: Secondary IF June 2016

    Medicated IUI cycle#1- Clomid+IUI -1/15/17 -BFN

    Break Mid 2017 - Resumed TTC December 2018

    "She believed she could so she did..."

    Medicated IUI cycle#2- Femara 5mg+IUI 12/22/18 - BFP 1/4/19 - MMC 2/1/19

    Saline Sono 3/15/19 - All Clear!

    Medicated IUI cycle#3- Femara 7.5mg+IUI 3/28/19-BFN

    Medicated IUI cycle#4- Femara 5mg+Gonal F 50iu+IUI 4/27/19- BFP 5/11/19 - MMC 6/12/19 - D&C 6/14/19-

    Incomplete M/C Repeat D&C - 7/3/19 -Testing concluded baby was genetically normal  :'(

    Dx: Unexplained RPL July 2019 - Tested + as carrier for Usher Syndrome & Familial Mediterranean Fever 

    Saline Sono 8/7/19 - Mostly Clear! All systems go for IVF#1 

    But will need a repeat Saline Sono between ER and FET

    IVF #1 - Antagonist Protocol - 8/17/19

    ER#1 8/27/19 - 12R, 6F, 4 biopsied+frozen! (3d5blasts + 1d6blast)- 2 PGS normal embabies!

    Saline Sono 9/13/19 - All Clear! Onto FET Prep#1

    FET#1 - 4AA -10/4/19 - BFP 10/14/19 - EDD - 6/21/20 -Beta#1-10dp5dt- 379 Beta#2-12dp5dt- 1007 Beta#3-14dp5dt- 2844

    DD born 6/15/20  <3

  • NYTino24NYTino24 member
    edited July 2019
    @hanshotfirst77 I read this article this week and although I didn’t find a study / citation, I hope it makes you feel better. 
    https://www.nytimes.com/2008/03/25/health/25brod.html
    It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*

    Me: 36 DH 35 
    TTC  9/2016     BFP 12/9/16    EDD 8/21/17    NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
    TTC  2/2017  BFP 3/6/17   EDD 11/17/17   DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
    TTC 12/2018   BFP 6/2/19   EDD 2/12/20  NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
    TTC 7/2019   BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
    TTC 8/19    IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone  BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
    IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20

    AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
  • @NYTino24 thanks I’ve been scouring the internet ever since this loss desperately searching for some hope. It’s hard when literally every possible reason can be refuted in my case. Being unexplained is so hard. But articles like that do give me some hope that maybe the stats are still in my favor and this was just horrendous luck. I hope it helps you too. 

    TTC#1 - March 2013

    BFP 8/9/13 - EDD 4/14/14 - DS born 4/23/14

    TTC#2 November 2015

    Dx: Secondary IF June 2016

    Medicated IUI cycle#1- Clomid+IUI -1/15/17 -BFN

    Break Mid 2017 - Resumed TTC December 2018

    "She believed she could so she did..."

    Medicated IUI cycle#2- Femara 5mg+IUI 12/22/18 - BFP 1/4/19 - MMC 2/1/19

    Saline Sono 3/15/19 - All Clear!

    Medicated IUI cycle#3- Femara 7.5mg+IUI 3/28/19-BFN

    Medicated IUI cycle#4- Femara 5mg+Gonal F 50iu+IUI 4/27/19- BFP 5/11/19 - MMC 6/12/19 - D&C 6/14/19-

    Incomplete M/C Repeat D&C - 7/3/19 -Testing concluded baby was genetically normal  :'(

    Dx: Unexplained RPL July 2019 - Tested + as carrier for Usher Syndrome & Familial Mediterranean Fever 

    Saline Sono 8/7/19 - Mostly Clear! All systems go for IVF#1 

    But will need a repeat Saline Sono between ER and FET

    IVF #1 - Antagonist Protocol - 8/17/19

    ER#1 8/27/19 - 12R, 6F, 4 biopsied+frozen! (3d5blasts + 1d6blast)- 2 PGS normal embabies!

    Saline Sono 9/13/19 - All Clear! Onto FET Prep#1

    FET#1 - 4AA -10/4/19 - BFP 10/14/19 - EDD - 6/21/20 -Beta#1-10dp5dt- 379 Beta#2-12dp5dt- 1007 Beta#3-14dp5dt- 2844

    DD born 6/15/20  <3

  • *TW possible CP*

    I just want to vent. I took a test yesterday and it was negative at about 10-11 DPO. But I took a test this morning and there was a vvfl. However, every pregnancy I’ve had, I’ve had a positive noticeable by 9 DPO. And so I told DH about the test, but also told him not to get his hopes up because of how light it was and how all my physiological signs were trending towards my period. And then I started bleeding today. I’m a mixed bag of emotions because I’m obviously upset, but I had also set my mind on IVF and I was expecting it really. Also, it convinces me even more that IVF is right for us. I just don’t know right now. 
  • @mokay19 I am so sorry you are experiencing this. Having just gone through a CP this week, I definitely understand the whole messy mix of emotions. So many hugs to you. 💜

  • @mokay19 I'm so sorry about the CP. I totally get the excitement for IVF and how conflicted you must feel. Sending hugs.  <3
  • @mokay19 So sorry to hear about your CP. It's one of those weird things like--do you wish you knew or not? It's such an emotional thing to have to go through, and with the attention those of us trying like most of us here are, it's inevitable we'd be in the know. I am glad you can see some light down the IVF route. I am always talking about staying positive when we can. <3
  • @mokay19 I’m so sorry about the CP. I feel ya on the readiness for IVF. But I can understand how torn you must feel. Hugs ❤️

    TTC#1 - March 2013

    BFP 8/9/13 - EDD 4/14/14 - DS born 4/23/14

    TTC#2 November 2015

    Dx: Secondary IF June 2016

    Medicated IUI cycle#1- Clomid+IUI -1/15/17 -BFN

    Break Mid 2017 - Resumed TTC December 2018

    "She believed she could so she did..."

    Medicated IUI cycle#2- Femara 5mg+IUI 12/22/18 - BFP 1/4/19 - MMC 2/1/19

    Saline Sono 3/15/19 - All Clear!

    Medicated IUI cycle#3- Femara 7.5mg+IUI 3/28/19-BFN

    Medicated IUI cycle#4- Femara 5mg+Gonal F 50iu+IUI 4/27/19- BFP 5/11/19 - MMC 6/12/19 - D&C 6/14/19-

    Incomplete M/C Repeat D&C - 7/3/19 -Testing concluded baby was genetically normal  :'(

    Dx: Unexplained RPL July 2019 - Tested + as carrier for Usher Syndrome & Familial Mediterranean Fever 

    Saline Sono 8/7/19 - Mostly Clear! All systems go for IVF#1 

    But will need a repeat Saline Sono between ER and FET

    IVF #1 - Antagonist Protocol - 8/17/19

    ER#1 8/27/19 - 12R, 6F, 4 biopsied+frozen! (3d5blasts + 1d6blast)- 2 PGS normal embabies!

    Saline Sono 9/13/19 - All Clear! Onto FET Prep#1

    FET#1 - 4AA -10/4/19 - BFP 10/14/19 - EDD - 6/21/20 -Beta#1-10dp5dt- 379 Beta#2-12dp5dt- 1007 Beta#3-14dp5dt- 2844

    DD born 6/15/20  <3

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