Weekly Randoms 6/17 - 6/23

ibabyloveb87

All the random thoughts and conversations go here. 

bg122785

I work for a small company and with my last pregnancy, I only got 6 weeks of maternity leave. Well the State of WA has a new paid family and medical leave program that I have to pay into and as of Jan 1st, 2020, employees who have a baby get 3 months paid time off by the state. So I emailed them today to confirm since my business is a small business they are not exempt from allowing that, because I am sure as shit taking ALL 3 months if it is possible. So I pray they confirm that my company can not deny me the 3 months off. This is just huge for me because I have about 62 days of vacation and sick leave, and if I don't have to use any of that, it would be amazing also! So fingers crossed I get these 3 months paid time off from the State so I can stay home longer to bond with my little one and not drain all my sick and vacation at the same time.

craftywitch

@briannah1010 FX for you that they aren't exempt! That's an awesome policy and to still have all your PTO after too- that's the direction we need to be headed! Keep us updated when they get back to you.

ibabyloveb87

@briannah1010 fingers crossed for you!! 

I remembered this morning that right after I had DS, my company added 20 days of “parental leave” for either parent to take during the first 6 months after birth/adoption. Super excited for an additional 4 weeks that won’t come out of my PTO/sick time. Otherwise I wouldn’t have any left for the rest of the year! 

bg122785

Will do @craftywitch!! I am antsy, so I might just be calling on my lunch instead of waiting for an email back. lol

Thanks @ibabyloveb87! And that is awesome your company did that! We definitely need more things like that and what WA state has done for maternity leave. I am fortunate since working in a small office, I can bring my baby to work, but nothing compares to being at home bonding with your brandy new squishy baby. 

ibabyloveb87

@briannah1010 yeah I’m already worried about childcare. I live in a tiny town and there’s not many options! 

0hmymadelin3

My kids had their first day of summer swimming lessons today and it’s 65°. Ugh. June has been so cold here so far and not summer like at all. 

bg122785

Welp, I will be covered as far as getting paid through the State and not having to use sick or vacation time but I don't have job protection since we are under 50 employees. So looks like I get to negotiate with them which should be fun. NOT. I am demanding a minimum of 2 months, 2 weeks longer than they told me I could last time. I never take time off, hence the crap ton of hours I have saved up, so I am going to bring that up. Fingers crossed when that talk happens in a month or so.

brookert615

@briannah1010 Crossing everything for you that you’ll be able to get it all negotiated! 

burr1371

I hate that maternity leave is something to be "negotiated". It should just be standard!

alseltzer

Same, unfortunately I don't think I get any paid leave at all.  I know my job is secure, but no paid time.  And I don't accumulate any sick or vacation days with my current position, so I can't even use them    Might be time to actually get an Etsy shop going for some extra money.

craftywitch

@briannah1010 Ugh ick! Sorry you have to deal with negotiating for maternity leave which I 100% agree should be standard issue and fully-paid. I hope they surprise you with a new attitude based on the new state policies.

bg122785

Thanks ladies!! It is SO unfortunate how maternity leave is looked at all across the U.S. I really wish there was a nationwide requirement 3 months minimum, no ifs and or buts about it. I have worked here 13 years and we are so small, we are like family. Just having one person gone that long can be tough, especially during part of cold and flu season. My main coworker has two littles, and they got sick a lot this last winter, so I can see my supervisor bringing up that as a possible issue. But that being said, we are like family so I really hope with being an dedicated employee for this long, and that I rarely take time off, they can understand and give me the 3 months I would ideally love. So we will see. I am hopeful it will all work out. 

@alseltzer Ugh girl, that really stinks! I am sorry. Let me know what you have in your shop. I will buy some things!

alseltzer

@briannah1010 it sounds like you work in a great place!  Hope it all works out. 

NYTino24

Four more days of school with kids!!

daffodil_shoe

Staying awake on night shift is hard.

Add snuggling a baby in a quiet nursery, even harder.

Add general pregnancy exhaustion...omg y’all I’m fighting so hard to stay awake at work right now! Still have 7 hours to go...

aleciaraez

We are getting close to seeing leap year due dates!! I’m oddly super excited for this. 

@briannah1010 I’m also thinking about the new paid leave here in WA. It’s going to be interesting because we’ll be some of the first going through it. I work for a public school, so I’m hoping there isn’t going to be issues since technically I work for the state! Also, keep in mind that it isn’t fully paid. The formula is a little complicated but depends on how much you make in the first place. 

alseltzer

I was curious about that paid leave law you guys were talking about and good thing I researched! Turns out NJ has the same law! I just assumed since NJ sucks with most things government and tax wise, we wouldn't have it. So I hopefully can get partially paid leave! That would help out tremendously since my husband will be finishing up his masters and won't have as much time to work as we might need. That just gave me a huge relief.

NYTino24

@aseltzer NJ goes from 6-8 to 12 weeks paid leave in July. We are going to miss it!

alseltzer

@NYTino24 So no paid at all? 

Edited:  Ohhhh I see,  we'll miss the 12 but still get the 6-8.  I'll take what I can get at this point. I honestly wasnt expecting anything.

ibabyloveb87

So last pregnancy, I didn’t color my hair. Can I do that? I feel like I’ve heard mixed opinions on this. I’m in desperate need.... the grays are out of control. 

ETA: just realized this should probably be in the question thread but I didn’t think about it til now and don’t want to DD. 

daffodil_shoe

@ibabyloveb87 ask your stylist if they have pregnancy-safe dyes. My stylist does, so that’s what we used last time I was pregnant.

DDRRT1982

I am in Texas, so if it wasn’t for FMLA we wouldn’t get any time off.  I am so excited to see areas of the country improve their maternity/paternity leave policies.  The studies show that when mother’s feel like they had sufficient maternity leave the tend to return and stay at a higher rate.  My company only gives you your PTO and five weeks if you subscribe to STD.  It’s sad. Fortunately, my boss is pretty awesome and will let me take as much time as I need, but I do feel slightly bad because this is my third baby/maternity leave in four years.  However, this will be my first 12 weeks. I have only taken six each time.  Definitely not enough, but our insurance is so expensive I have to go back.  

brookert615

I'm in PA and we get 12 weeks but I have short-term disability that will pay me a little chunk each week and just last year my company announced that they will pay the difference of what we get in short-term disability to get us to our full salary during our 12 weeks of maternity leave. I'm praying they keep it because there was a little clause that they can end it at any moment at the company's discretion.

bg122785

@aleciaraez Oh I know the money from the state will not be my full wages. I will also be getting short term disability and coverage for hospital stay as well from Aflac, so figured that would cover any difference. I am also starting to put a little extra money away each check also. To me, it is worth getting a little less for a few months to not have to use all of my sick and vacation time. Hopefully you will be able to take advantage of it as well! 

craftywitch

The biggest reason I took the job I have now is because they offer up to 6 months of leave and my manager knows I plan to take the full 6 months. 1 month is fully paid, I get 4 weeks annual PTO that I can take and have a little left from last year, and I have 6 weeks short term disability at 60% that I'll be taking. It'll be a cobbled together mess, but I know that for breastfeeding to work I need daycare to start when solids start. Last time I ended up having to choose between breastfeeding and my job so after 6 weeks of pumping not really working out, I stayed home until DS was 1. Praying this plan works and doesn't disrupt my career again.

brookert615

@craftywitch Oh man, that is super tough! That's great you get 6 months! Hope that your plan will be solid!!! 

aleciaraez

@briannah1010 It’s totally worth it even if not full pay! We also are going to work on saving up to make it work — luckily DS starts kindergarten so we will save on preschool/child care costs. Kind of why we waited to try for baby #2...

@craftywitch I’m so worried about making pumping work. I’m a teacher so it’s going to be rough. I feel like I could end up having to give up breastfeeding because it’ll be so hard to manage in my day! Ugh!

brookert615

So many one-off posts lately! 🤔

daffodil_shoe

brookert615 said:

So many one-off posts lately! 🤔

I always wonder how socially awkward these people are IRL. Never bothering to read the room before talking, just barging in, never listening to others, just waiting for their turn to talk. That’s what I imagine!

ibabyloveb87

@brookert615 who needs rules? 

brookert615

It's more about organization, in my opinion. Things can get really out of hand on The Bump lol.

elmann1

brookert615 said:

It's more about organization, in my opinion. Things can get really out of hand on The Bump lol.

Omg YES. I'm actually impressed with the level of organization in this group! Oct 2015 was a hot mess, but man was it entertaining. 

brookert615

@elmann1 Haha I can only imagine LOL. I only experienced the one-off's in TTGP! 

bg122785

Ok...my coworker is cooking eggs. I am going to vomit. WHYYYYY?

brookert615

@briannah1010 Oh no! How are they even able to cook eggs at work? Do you guys have a full kitchen? 

bg122785

@brookert615 Yeah, the office I work in used to be a house. So we have a full kitchen which is really nice most times. But not times like today when someone makes eggs and then also burns them. So bad.

brookert615

@briannah1010 Stay strong, girl! That is so rough! 

jessieR358

We get 16 weeks unpaid maternity leave in TN. No one will you tell you either—you have to know and ask, which is awful. My current job offers no paid maternity leave at all and PTO doesn’t roll over. Luckily, I work as needed and its not a big deal, but I feel really bad for people who are SOL (at my job). I think a lot of women who are in lower paid positions will just quit honestly. 

brookert615

@jessieR358 That's wild! I think it's annoying that you have to have STD for so long before getting pregnant for it to cover things, too! I know I was trying to get supplemental insurance and it was such a hot mess! 

ibabyloveb87

@briannah1010 someone cooked fish here the other day. It was awful!!! I hope the smell went away quickly.