Weekly Bitchfest 5/13/19

ketomommy

Let's hear em.

ketomommy

I'll start with my continuing frustration with my mother in law.  Mother's day brunch was miserable, as expected.  She gave me a gift that I would never wear.  I don't mean to sound ungrateful, but in the seven years I've been with her son, I've never once worn a house dress.  Didn't thank us for the $200 we spent on brunch.  I am used to that... 

Here is where I nearly lost it.  I got upset at one point thinking I was eating too many carbs.  My husband reminded me that at the last appointment the doctor said I was 5 lbs under where she would expect me to be in this pregnancy.  My mother in law, felt the need to call me "huge," say "by next month you won't be able to walk" and so on at least four times.  My husband repeatedly told her to stop and she didn't.  Then we got home, and she didn't get my non-verbal cues that I was upset with her.  I ended up spending the afternoon in my bedroom to avoid her.  She only left when I loudly announced that we had to leave to go pick up my parents from the airport.  

I have to see her again this weekend for my 2 year old's ballet recital.  If she says anything other than "I'm so proud of you" and "you did great" to the kid, I will lose my shit.

tsa208

I wrote this on my weekly checkin, but I'll share with you ladies too.

Life is insane right now. I have a completely new position at work (so basically I'm feeling super inept until I figure it out), I'm finishing my very last semester of a masters program at Harvard, I have an infant-turned-toddler (18 months) and I have no idea how to handle this new toddler behavior, and I'm 8 months pregnant. Oh and we bought a new house and are selling our current house, both of which are way more work than I was prepared for. So honestly, I forgot about Mother's Day. My mom and my MIL have been bending over backwards - literally taking last minute flights to come help us out, dogsitting for a month now, etc - and I forgot to plan something for them and I felt kinda bad bc this day is important to them. So in between disinfecting every inch of this new house and scrubbing nicotine off the walls since the previous owner was a smoker, I shot off a sweet Facebook message to thank them on Mother's Day so at least there was SOMETHING, because both moms like that kind of public attention.

Well, that caused drama with my step mom-in-law, whose sister hopped on my post like "Oh, so stepmom doesn't make the cut?" I care about my SMIL, but DH and I are in our late 30s and she married my FIL like 6 or 7 years ago. It's not like she raised DH. And SMIL and FIL just aren't really around that much. That's fine, I don't ask them to be and I'm happy for any time they spend with my daughter, but I'm not going to pretend that she's the same mother to me and DH as our moms, who both raised us as single moms. So I had to do cleanup this morning to keep the family peace - including a sternly worded text to her sister about posting that on a post to my friggin' MOM (like, if you have an issue, just please reach out to me individually and privately), but I'm just emotionally exhausted by it, after dealing with everything else going on in my life. Come on people, we're too old for FB drama, we're not a bunch of teenagers. 

tsa208

@ketomommy "felt the need to call me "huge," say "by next month you won't be able to walk" and so on at least four times. "

  Wow! Talk about insensitive. Especially when she did it AFTER being told to stop - that's not insensitive actually, that is purposeful. You did well holding it together! I'm angry pregnant lady these days and I probably would have snapped, making the situation even worse.

ketomommy

@tsa208 If we weren't in a really fancy restaurant, I might have told her to take an uber home and go f*** herself.

indulgentgypsy

Minor bitch, but still....

So the friend who said she wanted to throw me a baby shower because she knew I never really had one with either of the boys and her mom was coming for the month of May and would help her plan and we would get together and discuss details and yada yada yada... Yeah she hasn't talked to me since that initial message 3 weeks ago. All the people I would invite teach at my school. If I am going to invite them I need to do it before next week when we all leave for the summer. I almost think with Memorial day coming up that we have passed a decent time to even have a shower so... it looks like I won't be getting one for this baby either. Whatever. 

@ketomommy the fact you have not actually smacked your MIL yet proves you are a far better woman than I.

ketomommy

@indulgentgypsy Meh.  Husband sent her a weak email.  I am hormonal and dgaf.  I replied with this:

MIL:
Please do not call me.  (DH) asked you multiple times to stop and you didn't.

I respect your role as his mother and (DD's) grandmother and they will see you Sunday.

Also, I would be annoyed too if you need to send out invites.

indulgentgypsy

Thank you And really, most of the teachers I work with have plans to leave soon after school gets out for trips, vacations, family visits in the lower 48. It's very much an "oh well, no shower" thought at this point. 

ketomommy

OMG.  MIL responded to the e-mail..."Yes, it was entirely related to the pregnancy! It is also what many people say when they see a pregnant woman and is meant only to commiserate  with her efforts in carrying the baby."

tsa208

@ketomommy Um, yeah, we all assumed it was related to the pregnancy. It's still not something pregnant women want to hear.  And even if intentions are good, once you're told to stop, you stop.

mamahmh2

@ketomommy man, she’s a real peach. Sorry you have to deal with that. Would she have wanted to hear about how huge she was when she was pregnant?! Probs not.

jennm0724

@ketomommy wow.. thats all I can say.. you deserve an award.. she deserves a special place in hell

We're having new floors installed in our entire downstairs.. so I am stuck upstairs with the dog while they work.. I feel like a prisoner in my own house LOL. Yesterday I brought up a lunch bag with a bunch of snacks so that I wouldn't have to go down and be in the way. They worked almost until 7pm, I was so hungry but couldn't leave to go get food until they left.. Today is day 2 of the install..

Oh and my baby shower is on Saturday at my house.. the forecast is now showing rain.. this was supposed to be outdoors.. now I have to scramble to figure out how to get all these people inside my house which isn't very big.. YAY..

fromcatstokids

@indulgentgypsy Sorry to hear your shower fell through. That's disappointing! 
@jennm0724 My fingers are still crossed that the weather clears up for you!! It could totally happen. 

jennm0724

Thanks @fromcatstokids it feels like my wedding weekend all over again... outdoor wedding with no option of indoors...the forecast kept showing rain for Saturday, but it ended up raining Friday and Saturday was amazing! But the newspapers are saying we’re getting a big storm this week and I’m going to need a miracle for a dry day! 

indulgentgypsy

I would hunt this person down and beat the ever loving shit out of them!!!!!!!

asupernovablizzardstorm

I'm bitchy at dh. On Mother's day I told dh I wanted some brownies and he said he'll make them on Monday since we got home late on Sunday. Okay, Monday comes and goes. He gets home on Tuesday and says that he's making cookies for work and doesn't mention the brownies at all. Then today he says he's making another batch for work. I finally said that I'm glad that your job comes before your pregnant wife. He made some apology brownies but is still complaining bc he has to stay up late to finish making cookies. 

Another is dh and dd both saying everyday that I need to take a nap. How about you just ask what I need I help with or how am I feeling. A fing nap is going to help me. 

indulgentgypsy

@asupernovablizzardstorm I feel ya mama. I have asked DH (who is a professional cook) to make dinner a few times. I have made dinner every night except for the one I was sick with the flu. He never makes dinner any more and it gets frustrating. 

gembud

It seems like my whole entire office is sick and the three people who sit immediately next to me are all hacking up a lung - a. gross b. you sit next to a pregnant woman, take a damn sick day! UGH 

foodislove

THE A/C IS OFF IN MY BUILDING. WTF. It's like 85 up in here. I'm in a dress and I'm dying.

At least my boss said I can telework tomorrow. Seriously though, it's May now people.

fromcatstokids

Why doesn't anyone use their turn signal while in rush hour traffic? Also, stop going into the right turn lane and then cutting into the left turn lane just because you're too special to wait in traffic. A-holes.

greeneyedgirl12

@foodislove UGH. I wouldn’t be able to deal. I run warm when I’m NOT pregnant. Glad you get to telework tomorrow. 

cb123391

No one can seem to tell me which hospital I'll be delivering at. My regular ob says if I deliver before 36 weeks I need to go to the hospital that has the NICU. The MFM doctor tells me that if I make it past 34 weeks the other hospital and my Dr should have no problem delivering me and my twins should not need to spend time in the NICU. I just want to know where the hell my babies will be born and have a game plan. 

greeneyedgirl12

@cb123391 Does the “other” hospital have any NICU? I thought any hospital that did deliveries had to have at least a “basic” one, but the one your OB was talking about may have the higher level one...

Bear14+

@cb123391 Can you just pick the one with the NICU? Is it that much further? Sometimes even babies born in the 36 or 37th week have to go to NICU and it would suck for them to be taken there while you are stuck at the other hospital recovering! 

greeneyedgirl12

Just had a guy back into my leg in my row/seat while I was in my seat on the plane so he could let his seatmate in and then claimed I was “in his blind spot.” Thanks? Maybe I’m not as huge as I feel? But also/mostly 🤬.

cb123391

@greeneyedgirl12 @Bear14+ yes the other one does have the highest rated NICU. And the one my ob delivers at has the level under that. I have no problem delivering at either. They're both 45-60 minutes away from me but I just want clarification on where to go. Baby a has a velementous cord so I was told if those membranes rupture he could essentially bleed out so I'll already be in a stage of panic and when you hear conflicting opinions from two drs it gets frustrating

foodislove

@cb123391 You need to get your doctors on the same page. I'd call up the one delivering the baby and tell them you are being told two different hospitals, give them your MFM's information, and finalize which hospital because you need to register soon.

jenniferjoy37

@fromcatstokids this is one of my BIGGEST pet peeves while driving. I think everyone should redo their drivers test every 10 years and past 50yrs old, every 5!!! 

greeneyedgirl12

@cb123391 Your docs need to talk and come to a consensus. That's not your job, and they have to know it's stressing you out... 

fromcatstokids

@jenniferjocalling. Haha! Yes! I'm usually mumbling at them to go back to driver's ed along with with the name calling.

gembud

Some man walking past me on the street just asked if I was having triplets - hi Monday, I have not missed you.

mamanbebe

@gdbud630 I'm feeling a little man ragey already today but I would have seriously gone apeshit on that guy. WHY do they think they have a right to comment and say something so uncouth to a complete stranger? Will we ever regain grace, courtesy and manners in our society or are we just plunging into the oblivion of terrible behavior forever?  

gembud

I'm back to bitch two days in a row! I found out this morning the person who handles disability/fmla all that crap at my obgyn's royally fucked up my paperwork and guess what our benefits coordinator leaves tomorrow for a three week vacation. Took me from 8am to 11am - running around like an absolute psycho to get it fixed. Stress level is at max capacity right now, I need to go home....stick a fork in me cause I am donezo.

jenniferjoy37

@gbud630 Ugh, so sorry! I hope it got fixed though!! I hope you get a chance to relax today... 

indulgentgypsy

@gbud630 that sucks!

So one of the LA teachers just came to me about one of my SPED students. Apparently she has been plagiarizing a significant portion of her work this semester. The LA teacher wanted my support for a 0 grade for the student. I totally supported, but super disappointed in my student. She is just on the border of needing SPED supports, so the writing assignments she plagiarized were not beyond her ability to complete. She has just gotten lazy.