Nanny Search - so many questions!

acgx

I think we're likely going to be going with a nanny for childcare after I go back to work from maternity leave. I have so many questions and don't really know where to start! I hope some of you have some insight!

At the most basic, what's the best way to go about finding one? I know there's Care.com, franchises like College Nannies & Tutors, private nanny agencies, and it seems like a lot of people find their by word of mouth. Pros, cons? Other, better ways to find one? Is it worth the extra cost of the agencies for them to do vetting, etc for you?

When should you start applying with agencies or interviewing nannies?

Once you have one, what's the best way to pay them? I think we'd prefer to pay a weekly rate, as our hour requirements will differ each week. Is that acceptable or do people expect to be paid hourly? And what about taxes? I know if you use some agencies, they handle that right? But if you don't use an agency, how do you go about handling that yourself?

Also, anyone had an au pair? I don't think we'll go that route, but there definitely seem to be some obvious pros and cons about having one!

OMG, so many questions. Any other advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance! 

nolemomma14

I think an agency or word of mouth are the best route to go! I worked for a babysitting company in college and we had a phone interview, in person interview and then a background check done, before being hired. Always made families feel better once they knew what the hiring process was. It was a smaller local company, but they would get requests from a family, and send them info on 2-3 sitters. The families would then meet with the sitters, do a trial run if they wanted, before making a final choice. I would check if there’s any sort of local company near you! I’m not entirely sure how care.com works, but the nice thing about the company I worked for was there was always an on call sitter. So if the original sitter was sick that day, you weren’t put in a scramble having to find someone for the day. As far as taxes, I received a 1099 from the babysitting company, so the families didn’t have to do anything for that. The only other time I have been a nanny, it was all cash, and under the table. 

In terms if pay, I think that will just depend on the nanny. When you interview people, I would offer the weekly pay, if that’s what you would prefer. If they would rather be paid hourly, it’s something that can be discussed, and you can see if you can find some middle ground. 

Make sure you let them know up front what is expected of them in terms of your house. Most families I worked with just expected the house to be in the state it was upon arrival, which just meant picking up after myself or anything of the babies I used throughout the day. I had other families who wanted more housework done. I didn’t mind, but definitely nice to know those things up front. 

frenchbaby18

We had a nanny for DD and I’m leaning towards an au pair this time around.

Things are a bit different in France so I’m not sure how relevant my comments will be!

We found ours through word of mouth. Honestly I was so tired at that point that I didn’t ask the right questions. She was really good for the baby stage but as DD became a toddler, wasn’t super engaging or enriching. I would definitely recommend thinking about things that are important to you at different stages and asking relevant questions (ie are you pumping and want her to give breast milk? Do you want to do baby led weaning? How many times a week do you want them to leave the house? What are their favorite activities at each development stage? Etc)

For pay, it’s super different here than the US - we had a full on contract that covered her healthcare and gave her vacation days etc. Also, there is a set hourly rate that depends on the level of training the nanny has so little wiggle room for pay. You also pay a reduced rate 2 of the hours of the day during naps to assume they can do personal stuff on that time which I found interesting....as an ex nanny I wouldn’t have appreciated that

One of our major issues was the use of her cell phone so I highly recommend discussing that or any other really important things for you and putting them in the contract!

Following to see if others have some good advice on au pairs

ketomommy

I know people who love their au pairs.  Here were my reasons we went with full day day care and not an au pair:

1) I didn't want a 20 year old with my child all day unsupervised.  I was concerned they weren't mature enough.
2) On the topic of maturity, one of my friends had multiple au pairs over the years.  She had to create rules around how loud they could be when they brought they brought home a date for a booty call.
3) I don't want a stranger living in my house.

frenchbaby18

Thanks @ketomommy. We are in a bit of an atypical situation because the au pair would live in our old apartment (so fully indépendant) and for now I’m looking only at college grads who are maybe a bit lost or want language learning experience before grad school....but your points are definitely valid!!

one thing that does make me hesitate is the limited number of hours per week so we would need a second care solution as well...but we will see! I think at least I’ll keep exploring the au pair option, apply for day care, and keep my ear open for nannies...who knows! I just really like the idea of having someone speaking English with both kids and I like the young aspect because our nanny with DD was in her 50’s. While technically capabable, I felt that she wasn’t dynamic enough to keep up with DD when she started needing more stimulation.

acgx

@ketomommy @frenchbaby18 I feel like I can't settle into one side of the pros or cons of an au pair. For a lot of the reasons yall mentioned. Sometimes I think, wow, it would be so great to have someone young, with lots of energy, who can teach my child another language and whose hours I can set (within the rules). But then I think, ehhh do I want such a young, potentially immature person, living IN my home, for a minimum of a year, after just selecting them off the internet...