So i had my appointment today. Pretty much she said i have three options. 1- wait it out and see what happens, 2-add a month of birth control pills (on top of the nexplanon and see if that stops the bleeding and regulates me, or 3-take out the implant. I wasnt about to take ADDITIONAL hormomes to put a bandaid on a problem and i told her as much. I have a life to get on with and im not going to wear a pad everyday just in case i start bleeding randomly. No thanks. So, Im getting the implant removed on Monday so hopefully i can get regulated and back to a somewhat normal.
Lol i was going to respond to mrs sellers but apparently i can't gif on the bump mobile. After my appointment i was feeling very snarky so maybe i shouldnt respond.
@sgrn18 Glad you have a plan! I can't believe they proposed "wait and see" as an option. A doctor once told me if you have breakthrough bleeding on hormonal bc, that means it's not 100% effective. I don't know how true that is, but I can't not think about it - bc is the #1 thing I want to be 100% effective! (Says the person who is very happily very pregnant after messing up bc, I know!)
@ashtuesday lol! Yeah i was skeptical of her. Shes a nurse practitioner which i usually love but this was my 1st appointment with her and i honestly just didnt really trust or feel comfortable waiting or adding more pills as it seemed counter productive either choice. She seemed shocked that I immediately dismissed those two options.
I have an appt with my new doctor this month and I can only hope she's as wonderful as my last doctor. I've been so crampy it sucks. My period was nearly painless and now the cramps haven't stopped. I'm on birth control but 70% of me is terrified I'm pregnant again.
@mccurleya i hope you like your new provider! I got myself all worked up right before all my bleeding because i got nauseated randomly and that only happened while pregnant. I was in Walmart when it happened so i grabbed a pregnancy test. Negative, as expected on birth control but i was like compelled to test. Take a test and let us know!!
@sgrn18, just a warning- it hurts like a b**** when they take it out. They numb up the area but unfortunately, it usually creates scar tissue around the implant that’s tough to separate from the healthy tissue. I had a huge bruise for like a month. @mccurleya, that would be crazy if you are, having just set up your program for your grad school. But I’m confident you’d rock both! @megpeg, I’m sorry for your community’s loss. T&Ps to the family and friends.
@maelily15 how long did you have yours for? Ive only had it about 8 months. Everyone said it'd be a nasty bruise after inserted but i barely bruised. The most annoying part was the pressure dressing i had to wear.
@mccurleya i started having some very obnoxious anxiety in the last month or so. I called my OB and she said they "dont consider it ppd/ppa after 6 mpp" which is complete trash in my opinion. I cant remember where i read it but ive heard it can come within the first year post partum. I called my family practice dr and got an appt to chat about options. Im thinking things are really acting up as my life is getting ready to change with going back to work and putting LO in daycare.
I I also thought ppd came come within the first year as well because of fluctuating hormones. I know after my middle child weaned himself two weeks prior to his first birthday - it totally reaked havoc on me. Tons of tears daily and sadness that lasted for several months. Looking back, it most likely was a bout with some ppd as my body weaned off of the hormones from nursing. It took several months to fully finish the weaning process. I would call and speak to your doctor or your general doctor for some advice.
I don't have a family doctor yet, but I meet with my OB on the 21st and I plan to mention it. Like, everything makes me want to cry. We watch cooking shows a lot and any time they mention how far they've come and get emotional I have to hold back tears and that is so not me. The cramps are what worry me most though. I don't know why.
Someone just won a white apron from Gordon Ramsay and I liked him so I thought it was sweet and I almost cried. I just need to know if this is a mom thing or a hormone imbalance 😂
Ladies I've been thinking of you. I don't know if it's ppd but I've been having more like anger issues. It might just be me realizing how much motherhood requires. DH does pretty much whatever he wants whenever he wants without even checking with me, and I'm on baby duty 24/7. I keep having to stop myself from just being passive aggressive because I know we have to sit down and have a real conversation. But then I swing back to totally in love watching him with LO and thinking about how soon we should try for the next. LOL I made a commitment to myself to fit in regular selfcare for the next few weeks. We'll see if that helps.
@fatstagnation I’m with you. I think it must be partly hormones because I started feeling angry and almost aggressive when I was pregnant (especially while driving) and it’s still there when I feel overwhelmed.
Being a mom brings up so much. We were in the city today and left LO with her aunt so I was totally fine until we got off the train - then it hit me “what if something happens to ALL of us” (DH and I were with my parents and sisters). I texted my best friend and told her if something happens Maeve is to be placed in the custody of her aunt & godfather and my bf & her husband and under no circumstances is to be put into the custody of my SIL or to be moved out of State. I know a text wouldn’t stand up in court - but I needed it written somewhere. I guess I need to look into a will. Sorry for being morbid; it was something that didn’t cross my mind until that moment. Having a baby I thought of food, clothes, a doctor and educational stuff and what would become of her if something happened to DH and I — but it seems there’s just always something else that pops up which adds to that “oh sh*t” feeling
sidenote: we had a great time and saw an amazing play and everyone is home safe and sound.
I'm right there with you, @fatstagnation. Part of me feels guilty because I know that my husband genuinely needs his "me" time on some level, and honestly, I don't feel that same need - I want to spend as much of my free time with N as I can. But it really bothers me that she is default my responsibility when we are both her parents. He'll put his headphones on to play video games or lock himself in the basement to fiddle with something without thinking twice because he just assumes I'll have Nora - I can never make the same assumption for him. It's frustrating. I don't think he sees it as a problem yet because he knows I can handle it all, but I have a feeling everything will come to a head when this LO comes around.
@sgrn18 Since you mention it, what is the official update on work and day care for you? Am I right thinking you're starting up in February? I'm sorry you've been feeling anxious. For me, the anxiety gearing up to going back to work and starting day care was way worse than once we actually started - I hope it's the same for you!
@ashtuesday we actually started full on panicking about not having found a daycare on Monday. MH was actually talking to his HR dept about taking his unpaid paternity leave to get us through my training. I started calling the places we were on wait lists for and asking for an updated time frame on Tuesday. I called my top choice and they have a spot for us! Im excited that we got this spot they have multiple teachers per room, good kid to teacher ratios, and CAMERAS THAT I CAN WATCH ALL DAY! I start work on Feb 18th but we are starting daycare on the Feb 11th (mainly for me to ease into it but also so I can ease him into it). Still have no idea if ill be working nights or days (it'll likely be nights) but this daycare works for both mine and MHs schedule regardless of what shift.
Im hoping the anxiety starts to fade once i get the hang of everything. Im just worried that since LO hasnt really been away from me ever that itll be traumatic for him. Plus they dont follow nap schedules for babies under 1 there so they nap when tired but the lights are on and kids are playing so im worried he wont nap. When he moves up to the next room though he will have scheduled nap in the dark with white noise which is what he is used to.
Eta: also LOs separation anxiety is going on full force right now, he freaks out if i leave his sight. So another fun thing to worry about
@sgrn18 when Nate when to daycare I checked in every hour. Now I don't check in at all unless I get bored or he has something going on I need to check about. You'll get used to it and so will he. And I bet they'll be good at distracting him!
Eta: Nate doesn't sleep nearly as much at daycare as he does on weekends. He's learned to adjust. And for your LO 1 is just around the corner so he'll get that dark room soon!
@sgrn18 Oh, I'm so glad to hear a spot opened up at your first choice! Yay!!! Like @mccurleya, I checked in constantly at the beginning but that changed over time - having the cameras at first is SO nice though! And N's day care has the same nap situation: the truth is, she barely naps there and it really isn't ideal, but it is what it is. Some kids nap just fine even with the lights and all - and yeah, it sounds like he'll be moving to the older, set nap time room soon! I hear your worries about separation anxiety. I had HORRIBLE separation anxiety as a kid (...that didn't exactly go away as I entered adulthood), and I was so scared Nora would have it too. But she is a supremely social being, and I think day care helped with that! She's able to make friends and play with adults that aren't me. So while the beginning might be rough if LO has bad separation anxiety, day care could ultimately be a really good thing for him. Better to deal with it now when he's younger than have it follow him around for the rest of his life!
@ashtuesday yes, I think it's his assumption that I've got it more than the actual ratio of how much time we each spend with LO. On the other hand, he's spent pretty much all day with her today and I'm feeling much better. V also has started separation anxiety. She cries if I leave her, or if someone else is holding her and then she sees me, but then she gets over it pretty quick if I'm out of site.
I'm reading "Baby's First Year Milestones," -by Aubry Hargis, and it says to create a goodbye ritual - rub noses and say "see ya later aligator," or whatever feels natural for you. Then leave with confidence. In time baby will know this means you're going, but you can be trusted to come back. ETA activity in the trailer.
@sgrn18, Sorry for the delayed response. Got called in today and yesterday. I had had mine for about 2 months shy of 2 years. Got it at 6 weeks PP (mid May 2015) and it came out March 2017. My unsavory symptoms (excessive unpredictable bleeding and constant migraines) began around December. We tried multiple other options because we weren’t sure if it was a hormonal imbalance and didn’t want to take out the implant just yet. But life had other plans for us. I just don’t do well on any form of birth control due to my migraines.
@fatstagnation yes! I have three kids and run myself ragged for them. I am on a couple committees at church but usually have to take my kids to meetings because he has stuff. He is in a basketball league, works out 4-5 days a week, is taking deacon classes for church- so class time and reading and homework, goes on weekend trips for work that aren’t really work they are guy time, trips with friends for the weekend, and he just took over the elders group at church, and he works around 50 hours a week. Most of this without a question of will this be ok for everyone else? He was complaining about being tired the other night and I said something along the lines of- maybe you need to choose things better so you can spend time with your kids who miss you instead of people that don’t appreciate what you’re giving up. And walked out. He got home from his class last night, we had dinner, and I left. I went and wandered around Walgreens because I needed some time. He knew better than to say anything. We are headed to Mexico next week kidfree(which is making me anxious) we are going to have some serious discussions. I know he has a lot on his plate with work and such but I Never get a break and no one seems very thankful.
@maelily15 i got it removed today. They numbed me up but i could feel them tugging it out so that was gross but so far not particularly painful just sore.
Im interested to see how my cycles are after this. Ive read mixed reviews that some people start a period right away and others ar a month or two later.
@megpeg yes. different details, but exact same situation.
In other news, I'm sick again. I think I've had a cold 4 times this fall/winter season. ugh. and LO isn't even in daycare. I wonder if she was sick last week and that's why she wasn't sleeping well. She seems fine now.
My husband is the laziest person I know and I am tired of it so I am going to vent. All I need is for him to do is the laundry (agreed upon chore) and FOLD IT, take out the trash, and pick his clothes up off the floor. But the fact that he can't even so that PLUS other things on top of that drives me crazy. Things only get done when they benefit him or when I just do it instead. For example, I asked him to scrub 2 dishes for me that the dishwasher wouldn't get after 3 runs. 2 weeks later and they're still on the counter. So I decide to soak them and THEN he decided it was a good time to wash them for me. Next, laundry was in baskets for over a week. I couldn't find the clothes I needed so I folded the laundry. Only now is he deciding to put it away. ALSO he nicely takes my plate after dinner if he gets up first BUT the trash doesn't get scrapped of. It goes in the sink. Therefore, food is left in the sink. I tested it. Chicken sat in the sink for over a week. Like seriously, you can't rinse a dish even though I ask daily? Why is it that I have to do the dishes, the laundry, cook every night, AND do all the caring and prepping for Nate, AND wake up every time Nate does while he gets to sleep in and be lazy. It really is simple to just put things where they belong and wasg clothes. I clearly have everything else covered. 😡
For what it's worth, I feel you, @mccurleya. The realization that helped me grapple with this is that my husband is someone who NEEDS to relax before he can do anything productive, which makes no sense to me because I'm someone who can't relax when things need to get done! Having chores done makes me feel better - it does not in any way do the same thing for him. So it's been a process to realize that if I want the dishwasher emptied, I often have to be the one to do it because he genuinely has no problem taking one fork at a time out to use - only I do! It's turned chores into a perverse form of self-care lol, and if he doesn't want to carry his weight in ways, that's on him. I fold my laundry, Nora's, and any household items (towels, sheets, etc.). My husband has chosen not to fold his laundry for the past month. I'm choosing to be okay with that because it only impacts him - he has to rifle through a crumpled basket of wrinkled clothes in the basement every morning, not me!
The one line in the sand I've drawn (that relates to what @fatstagnation brought up previously) is Nora-related. She is both of our responsibilities, and while I am very good at managing her needs, I hate that I am the only one that forward-plans for her (making sure her bag is ready for day care, making sure we have enough of her food on hand, making sure she has clean laundry, scheduling her doctor's appointments, etc. etc. forever, as you all know). I have made him solely and exclusively in charge of cleaning her bottles. I will not touch them under any circumstances, and I won't remind him to clean them. I don't actually have anything against cleaning bottles, I just need him to have ONE enduring responsibility for our damn child if I'm going to maintain my sanity!
OMG ladies, for real. My personal pet peeve is when DH puts away what's in the dish drain, he "Shoves them wherever." Those were literally his words when I asked him. So I go to put something away and there's no space because there's serving spoons where the spatulas go and the mason jars for canning where the coffee mugs go, etc etc. It's exactly what you said @ashtuesday when it comes to LO. When he takes care of her, he's babysitting. If I ask him to prep the diaper bag, he can do it, but he can't think of it on his own. We went to a hockey game last friday and he came waltzing in an hour later than he said he'd get home. he sat in the bathroom (on FB, probably) while I made dinner with Vinny in her high chair. Then, when I getting her and myself ready he's sitting on the couch playing his guitar. When we were halfway to the stadium (which is 5min from our house) I realized we forget the voucher for LO's free ticket. I dropped them off and went back to get it while he told everyone I forgot it. Um...are we a team? Did you remember them? No? The sad part is, he really wants to give me me-time, and he thanks me for everything I do for her. He really thinks he's being helpful.
ETA, ps it feels good to gripe with people who aren't going to be worried about our relationship, or my overall happiness, now.
Im sorry everyone is having husband troubles. I tried to take on everything since i was staying home thinking that i could manage it all, but i cant do it. I take care of EVERYTHING related to LO. So I leave the house to MH. I had a breakdown when he asked me why I couldnt have taken 10 mins to wash the dishes after a particularly hard day. I about killed him. Then he had to stay home while i did 12 hr days for clinicals and that shut him up real quick. I think sometimes they just dont see everything that we are doing.
My husband and I recently got into a fight on my birthday - I had to stay in the city late that day, I met up with my husband briefly who took off work early and ditched me to run and catch a train. When I balled him out for it, he said, "I was trying to rush home so I could surprise you with dinner and a clean baby when you get home!" It took everything for me not to say "So my BIRTHDAY surprise is you doing for me what I do for you as standard fare the other 364 days of the year?!"
Re: January Randoms
@fatstagnation I didn't want to click on it and get spam on my phone haha
Edit: words.
I didn't click on her link either. I was just not having it this morning. Plus I don't recall any of us asking for diaper bag advice. haha
@mccurleya, that would be crazy if you are, having just set up your program for your grad school. But I’m confident you’d rock both!
@megpeg, I’m sorry for your community’s loss. T&Ps to the family and friends.
But then I swing back to totally in love watching him with LO and thinking about how soon we should try for the next. LOL
I made a commitment to myself to fit in regular selfcare for the next few weeks. We'll see if that helps.
Being a mom brings up so much. We were in the city today and left LO with her aunt so I was totally fine until we got off the train - then it hit me “what if something happens to ALL of us” (DH and I were with my parents and sisters). I texted my best friend and told her if something happens Maeve is to be placed in the custody of her aunt & godfather and my bf & her husband and under no circumstances is to be put into the custody of my SIL or to be moved out of State. I know a text wouldn’t stand up in court - but I needed it written somewhere. I guess I need to look into a will. Sorry for being morbid; it was something that didn’t cross my mind until that moment. Having a baby I thought of food, clothes, a doctor and educational stuff and what would become of her if something happened to DH and I — but it seems there’s just always something else that pops up which adds to that “oh sh*t” feeling
sidenote: we had a great time and saw an amazing play and everyone is home safe and sound.
@sgrn18 Since you mention it, what is the official update on work and day care for you? Am I right thinking you're starting up in February? I'm sorry you've been feeling anxious. For me, the anxiety gearing up to going back to work and starting day care was way worse than once we actually started - I hope it's the same for you!
Im hoping the anxiety starts to fade once i get the hang of everything. Im just worried that since LO hasnt really been away from me ever that itll be traumatic for him. Plus they dont follow nap schedules for babies under 1 there so they nap when tired but the lights are on and kids are playing so im worried he wont nap. When he moves up to the next room though he will have scheduled nap in the dark with white noise which is what he is used to.
Eta: also LOs separation anxiety is going on full force right now, he freaks out if i leave his sight. So another fun thing to worry about
Eta: Nate doesn't sleep nearly as much at daycare as he does on weekends. He's learned to adjust. And for your LO 1 is just around the corner so he'll get that dark room soon!
V also has started separation anxiety. She cries if I leave her, or if someone else is holding her and then she sees me, but then she gets over it pretty quick if I'm out of site.
I'm reading "Baby's First Year Milestones," -by Aubry Hargis, and it says to create a goodbye ritual - rub noses and say "see ya later aligator," or whatever feels natural for you. Then leave with confidence. In time baby will know this means you're going, but you can be trusted to come back.
ETA activity in the trailer.
He is in a basketball league, works out 4-5 days a week, is taking deacon classes for church- so class time and reading and homework, goes on weekend trips for work that aren’t really work they are guy time, trips with friends for the weekend, and he just took over the elders group at church, and he works around 50 hours a week. Most of this without a question of will this be ok for everyone else?
He was complaining about being tired the other night and I said something along the lines of- maybe you need to choose things better so you can spend time with your kids who miss you instead of people that don’t appreciate what you’re giving up. And walked out.
He got home from his class last night, we had dinner, and I left. I went and wandered around Walgreens because I needed some time. He knew better than to say anything. We are headed to Mexico next week kidfree(which is making me anxious) we are going to have some serious discussions. I know he has a lot on his plate with work and such but I Never get a break and no one seems very thankful.
Im interested to see how my cycles are after this. Ive read mixed reviews that some people start a period right away and others ar a month or two later.
In other news, I'm sick again. I think I've had a cold 4 times this fall/winter season. ugh. and LO isn't even in daycare. I wonder if she was sick last week and that's why she wasn't sleeping well. She seems fine now.
The one line in the sand I've drawn (that relates to what @fatstagnation brought up previously) is Nora-related. She is both of our responsibilities, and while I am very good at managing her needs, I hate that I am the only one that forward-plans for her (making sure her bag is ready for day care, making sure we have enough of her food on hand, making sure she has clean laundry, scheduling her doctor's appointments, etc. etc. forever, as you all know). I have made him solely and exclusively in charge of cleaning her bottles. I will not touch them under any circumstances, and I won't remind him to clean them. I don't actually have anything against cleaning bottles, I just need him to have ONE enduring responsibility for our damn child if I'm going to maintain my sanity!
It's exactly what you said @ashtuesday when it comes to LO. When he takes care of her, he's babysitting. If I ask him to prep the diaper bag, he can do it, but he can't think of it on his own. We went to a hockey game last friday and he came waltzing in an hour later than he said he'd get home. he sat in the bathroom (on FB, probably) while I made dinner with Vinny in her high chair. Then, when I getting her and myself ready he's sitting on the couch playing his guitar. When we were halfway to the stadium (which is 5min from our house) I realized we forget the voucher for LO's free ticket. I dropped them off and went back to get it while he told everyone I forgot it. Um...are we a team? Did you remember them? No?
The sad part is, he really wants to give me me-time, and he thanks me for everything I do for her. He really thinks he's being helpful.
ETA, ps it feels good to gripe with people who aren't going to be worried about our relationship, or my overall happiness, now.