Ask a STM - Week of 12/17-12/23

ThePax89

@nursemom913 I bought some new headbands. Breast pads. Nipple cream. I need to order a new pump and get some diapers. This is my third daughter, so we don’t need anything. We might need a second crib and 10000% need a bigger car. 

eggsandwich2019

Random question - has anyone ever done a hypnobirthing class? I’m thinking about signing up for an online one but have never met anyone who has done one...

changadee

@eggsandwich2019 did not take a class (specialty classes like hypnobirth, lamaze, Bradley method etc aren't really available in my area) but I did read the whole book. If guided meditation type relaxation techniques are your thing I bet you would love it! I personally didn't buy in too much to the visualizations that they teach you. But I appreciated it because it helped me walk through effective breathing techniques and identify what other strategies worked best for me relaxation-wise.

danixbanani24

We have mostly everything we need too except for bottles, pacis, diapers and etc and then there are things I want rather than need lol so I’ll probably go shopping after the holidays 

ohsunnydays

@eggsandwich2019 I did not take a hypobirthing class, but I am reading the book now (like @changadee). I kinda got stuck at the visualizations (holiday craziness and had to put it down). I'm hoping to have time to finish the book over break.  I did try one of the tracks that came on the CD and it DID relax me. I might be someone that uses the breathing techniques, relaxation techniques, and the tracks. 
There was a hypnobirthing class near me, but it was EXPENSIVE, and it was watching a video for hours on end and then a short practice at the end. Ummm.. yeah no thanks. If I'm going to haul me and DH out for a class for multiple sessions and hours on end, I want it to be mostly teacher lead. 
I'm taking this online class called MamaNatural because DH will not read any books... fun times. LOL. That class is more for him. We're not getting a doula because he's great in medical situations and being supportive. He just needs to have tools in his toolbox. 
I'm not sure if I will want an unmedicated birth or not. I am a type of person that would rather be prepped for anything. Epidurals do fail! It makes me less anxious to be ready for anything.

eggsandwich2019

@ohsunnydays this is super helpful. I live in a rural location so there are no classes near me - I would do something online if at all. With your and @changadee 's recs I might get the hypnobirthing book. I'm with you, I don't know if I will end up with an unmedicated birth but I want to keep my options open and have tools to use just in case. I also have a doula, and DH has been reading the Birth Partner, which seems to be helpful. I might check out MamaNatural! The holidays are nuts but I am thinking once things slow down a bit post-Christmas I would like to make time to look at some of these resources. 

ohsunnydays

@eggsandwich2019 with mama natural one thing— I had to learn to look past the preachy “ ‘natural’ birth is the best thing” mindset that started the first class and remember I was taking the class for the techniques. I don’t want to get stuck feeling like I failed my baby if I need medical assistance! Wish they would call it unmedicated birth, too. Oh well. 

eggsandwich2019

@ohsunnydays word, I really hate the preachy "natural" birth shit, I appreciate the heads up. It's just more stress/shaming for women at a point where really we don't need to be made to feel like we failed if we end up birthing with interventions/medication. Modern medicine is a gift! 

ThePax89

@ohsunnydays I used to love mama natural, until about 2 years ago (when she introduced the course)  and I felt totally mom shamed by her natural birth is best bs. 

@eggsandwich2019 I read the book and really liked it. I don’t know how much an online class costs, but if it costs a lot more than the book, I’d either go the book or actual in person class route. 

changadee

@eggsandwich2019 the only thing I would say about the book is it is a bit out of date! At least my copy had never been updated or revised. And I found it to be quite preachy even for me wanting a natural birth... I find the Ina May book I'm reading now less so which says something. But it's nevertheless effective.

I do wonder though if I find it out of date or inaccurate because I'm reading it based on my experience with the Canadian health care system, which does have differing policies/practices. Anyway definitely pick it up! Less expensive and you get the CD, which could be a great sleep aid lol

becks_726

Which Ina May book are you reading @changadee? 
I'm curious about the hypnobirthing book now. I really enjoy guided meditation so it might be just right for me. 

eggsandwich2019

@changadee @ohsunnydays which hypnobirthing book(s) are you using? I also have Ina May's Guide to Childbirth which is pretty good but a tad hippy dippy (but I was expecting that)

ohsunnydays

@eggsandwich2019  
I got this version: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0757318371/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o04_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

disneybaby84

I like Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth 

changadee

@becks_726 like the others I am reading Ina May's guide to childbirth! The first half is all super hippie natural birth stories lol and it can get tiring. But the second half of the book is really excellent and well written/explained about birth and women's natural capacity for labor, different interventions etc. I think I have one or two chapters left. This one is not so much a how-to as much as a how-you-can if you will.

changadee

And @eggsandwich2019 I borrowed the same hyonobirthing book as @ohsunnydays from my MW, except I think it was the 3rd edition.

becks_726

@changadee I've read that one too and I'm debating reading Spiritual Midwifery. I had to jump ahead when I got about a third of the way through the first half because the stories just felt so far removed from what I need to prepare for.   I've currently got Birthing from Within on my nightstand but haveng read enough to comment. 

jessier19

@eggsandwich2019 which online course were you thinking about doing? I've had trouble finding an in person class in my area, and a lot of the online courses look just a little bit sketchy to me? Like I'm afraid of sending them money and then not really getting anything in return. 

eggsandwich2019

@jessier19 I was contemplating the calm birth school - the woman who founded it was on an early episode of the birth hour. It’s out of the UK and costs something like 175£ For 4 weeks, which isn’t that much but is why I’m a little on the fence. I think I’ll try the book recommended by @ohsunnydays and @changadee first and then see how it goes! 

becks_726

@jessier19 I signed up for and then 'returned' the course offered by the Birth Hour's host, I think it's called Know Your Options. It seemed to cover a lot but for the price (with the exchange rate...) I felt like I could easily get the same info from reading and researching for myself. 

megpants209

On the topic of natural birth books - I hated Ina May’s (prob bc I gave up during the birth on the farm parts) but I have one that’s something like Natural Birth in a Hospital that I really like since that’s where I’ll be. It’s much more forgiving on even the definition of natural birth and inclusive. 

etnyah

I'm not reading any books, I just can't get into it. All I plan on doing is take the childbirth prep class offered by the birth center I'm going to. Maybe I'm less prepared than most people, but that's kind of my approach in life anyway lol. Things always seems to turn out fine. 

cas060

No books for me either... We have a 2 day class coming up at the hospital, that's about all we're doing... otherwise it's all in the MW's hands.

riatortillaxo

I've been meaning to take a class and now I am worried that I am running out of time! I am almost more worried about my husband being unprepared, but whatever happens, happens! 

JamieH2000

I took an online class and it wasn’t actually too helpful- very high level. 
I got a book from the library (Pregnancy, Childbirth and the Newborn- the complete guide) and it was actually great. Perfect amount of detail. Quotes the latest research since the revised edition just came out this year. I should have saved myself the $40 on the online class from my hospital!

katamca

Honestly, for me when I was going through it the first time (and hell, even now) the most beneficial info was from this board. Hearing first hand experiences that others went through prepared me more I think. What I learned just through others on here at the time was invaluable. And even more so when the babies are born and you start trying to figure everything out.. I didn’t feel as clueless when I had a group of women going through the same thing!

glitterbug6

Just finished Ina May's book and I liked that it shared stories that our bodies are strong and capable! Next up is "Active Birth". Reading soothes me as a FTM 

becks_726

@glitterbug6 if you liked the stories and like podcasts, you should listen to the birth hour! I feel like they have really helped put me in a good mental space. 

bhou

STM's - did you feel a massive different between BH contractions and real contractions? I'm finding these BH contractions so damn painful and just curious if i will know the difference between them and the "real thing". 

allthingsgo

@bhou the BH contractions for me are just a tightening and uncomfortable and usually just in front. Real contractions are painful, period cramp like (more painful though) and form a band around your pelvic area. 

ChloandCoco

@bhou I used to think my BHs were contractions, until I had real contractions. Real ones are way more painful and will literally stop you from doing what you were doing. 

bhou

Ok. Good to know. i've been so very crampy(sometimes pretty painful) since boxing day on and off and my OB said it was BH - just a paranoid FTM  

BourbonBiscuits

Echoing what the others said @bhou - you won’t even want anyone to speak/breathe near you/look at you for real contractions

sjnsjnsjn

@bhou Not paranoid. Totally normal!  I was seriously timing BHs in the last week because I did not know that they were not the real thing.