T-Waffle Tuesdsay... on Wednesday

mamakate1616

mamakate1616

anyone familiar with the expression “see (c) you (u) next Tuesday”? I hate when my husband says it but I feel like it applies today.
My “team lead” has established herself as rather anti-mom (hated the idea of kids until she was in her late 30s and still says she hates other poeples’ kids, lots of weird and negative comments to me about my BFing/pumping, prematurely sharing my pregnancy with people, has made comments suggesting I shouldn’t pursue other opportunities while growing my family, not very understanding about sick kiddo, etc).
Evidently she has been telling people that I want a job that I can “coast” at so I can “ focus on being a mommy”...knowing full well I have an interview for a promotion coming up next week.
Add to this my real boss’s question about how the pregnancy will affect my career and I am livid. 
Fortunately I have a stellar reputation and she is known as a toxic/negative person (as is my boss) so I am not overly worried about what that does to my chances, but WTAF

kapowfal

@mamakate1616 WTAF indeed! I am livid on your behalf. That is 110% unacceptable. I have a similar sounding co-worker, but their problematic tendencies get overlooked because they aren't in management (thank goodness). How do these people stay in management?! Is your promotion interview within your current company?

Lbloom

Boy, that's brutal @mamakate1616 I have nothing to say to that except, Wow. 

mamakate1616

@kapowfal fortunately she is not in a legit supervisory postion, just over me on the org chart. People have been trying to make her a supervisor but she doesn’t want to be one, so at least there is that. Yes it is within my command, I feel pretty confident because that group has been “recruiting” me for about a year now. Fingers crossed the interview & follow on process goes smoothly so I can gtfo of this branch. 
Thanks for the commiseration, ladies!! 

bdesterhouse

Talk about BS @mamakate1616. Isn't that against employment laws for her to make those kind of comments? At least where I work, she would have broken at least three company rules warranting firing. 

gowenc

Same comment as @bdesterhouse. That goes against so many anti-discrimination laws/policies....ugh.

kristimh80

@mamakate1616 Ugh, what a c you next tuesday!! Can't wait for you to get out of that crazy place and it's toxicity. She sounds miserable all around and probably also doesn't like the attention you are getting from being pregnant. Maybe one day she'll be working for you...karma  

mamakate1616

applesandbananas23

Also, isn't it frowned upon/potentially illegal for managers to ask about pregnancy/family planning during job interviews?? I hope you get the job, @mamakate1616

Today a stranger at the dog park was the twat waffle for me. This dude's dog instigated a fight (growling turning to jumping and snapping/biting) with my dog at the dog park. Like the growling started before we even opened the gate and then the fight was immediate. The guy did nothing to step in and help me separate the dogs. Not even ten min later and it happened again. Like, dude! It's not my job to pull your dog off of mine! And also it's kind of dangerous because I don't know your dog! What if it had then attacked me while I was trying to keep my pet safe? But no he just stood there and watched while taking to the other dude there. I hate it when dog owners don't make sure their dogs are behaving.

kristimh80

@abbykwail Oh no, I'm glad you are ok! That's one of my biggest bet peeves too at dog parks. We know our one dog can be possessive over balls, so we keep him on a leash to do whatever while the other one messes around and talks to everyone. Sadly, I'm sure that's not the first time that's happened with that dog and his owner is just a jerk and super irresponsible. 

meggyme

MH’s work is the twat waffle. I had to cancel my massage for tonight because they NEEDED him to fly tonight, well his plane broke and now my appointment time is gone... and it’s not worth rescheduling for next week because I’m getting one next Sunday. AND while I guess I’m glad he’s coming home early he really messed up my plan to do a face mask and ugly cry to This Is Us tonight. First world problems...

applesandbananas23

@kristimh80 I totally get some dogs being reactive to some things, and I'm glad you are responsible with yours!

Like, as long as someone steps in to help when their dog is having issues it doesn't bother me at all! But it drives me nuts when people just watch and say nothing! I feel like if you can't be responsible then you shouldn't have pets! But I'm sure once I'm a mom different parenting things will bother me in the same way.. 

mamakate1616

Boo @abbykwail that’s terrible! Dog fights make me so nervous. 

It would absolutely be illegal to ask about that. Thankfully the new folks aren’t turds!! 

@meggyme oh no! There is nothing like quality “me time” and it sucks yours got messed up. 

ur_mom222

@mamakate1616 I feel for you and totally relate. My boss and job has been such a stressor for me. Anti-discrimination my ass (eye-roll). I had to get HR involved. Fingers crossed you get the job! Why people don’t understand that you can be successful at a career AND also be a wonderful mother is beyond me. It’s 2018.... a lot of women are working mothers nowadays. 

maggiemadeit

@mamakate1616 I hope your interview goes really well so you can get away from that unsupportive environment. 

navete

@mamakate1616 Sounds like she’s got a bad case of jealousy. I hope your interview goes well!

Lbloom

@abbykwail Not helping the pregnant lady by getting your aggressive dog off of hers? What an A hole!

applesandbananas23

@Lbloom RIGHT!!?!!? 

HoneyBear40

Me. I'm the twat-waffle. Severe "sadness" the last 2 days and I really have no explanation for it, I really don't. I feel bad for DH and my coworkers as I'm moping around for no reason. Worst part is I know I'm being ridiculous but I just can't seem to shake it.

litzi-2

@HoneyBear40 I'm sorry, that sucks, I get that too. It can be so hard to shake. Hope you feel better soon!

litzi-2

I'm not sure where to put this, so I'll put it in here. Went to an ultrasound appointment and met for 60 seconds with the perinatologist after. told her briefly that I didn't have cervix shortening/ dilation last pregnancy until 24 weeks, prior US normal (because she says they will stop screening at 23 weeks...) and she told me that well, maybe not knowing last pregnancy was a "blessing." I looked at her and was like, no. I was out of state and stuck in a city and hospital I didn't know without support while I thought I was bleeding out and losing the baby. And she was like, well, we don't do US past then. Have a good day. OMG what a useless group.

kristimh80

@litzi-2 Ugh, I'm sorry...how insensitive can she be?! Obviously, due to things happening last time, you are more hyper aware of it happening again. Is there anyone else there you can talk to or can maybe your normal OB perhaps help a little? I'd think due to the prior situation, they'd be more cautious this round. 

litzi-2

@kristimh80 Thanks . I'll try to talk to my OB. Hopefully she can help.

bdesterhouse

@litzi-2 can you switch perinate offices? My perinate office is doing an ultrasound every 4 weeks till Baby is here, and will do them after 23 weeks. I’m sorry you experienced that. I have two perinate doctors that I refuse to see bc of how I was treated when pregnant with my second child so I definitely understand your frustration and hope you can switch offices. 

litzi-2

@bdesterhouse i'll ask about switching. i hate to be a "problem patient" but i always leave there feeling worse instead of better. It really feels like they don't care whatsoever. Sorry you've gone through this too! Good to hear you found providers that listen!

bdesterhouse

litzi-2 said:

@bdesterhouse i'll ask about switching. i hate to be a "problem patient" but i always leave there feeling worse instead of better. It really feels like they don't care whatsoever. Sorry you've gone through this too! Good to hear you found providers that listen!

I think your baby is worth being that “problem patient “. Also, I don’t think you’re being a problem patient, that doctor is being a butthead and is the problem. 

meggyme

@litzi-2 I agree with @bdesterhouse. If they are ignoring you when you are voicing your concerns and looking for explanation, imagine how they would act if you were actively opposing them by voicing an objection to something. You deserve to have doctors that set you at ease and make you feel like you are in good hands. You are not being a problem patient. These doctors work for you and you deserve to feel respected and heard.