Official Crazy Family Thread (September/October) — The Bump
October 2018 Moms

Official Crazy Family Thread (September/October)

Though we're reaching the pregnancy homestretch, the crazy that is some of our families is probably only increasing.  Come take a load off, rant and rave as you wish.  

Re: Official Crazy Family Thread (September/October)

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  • At my baby shower, my MIL declared she wanted to see the baby as soon as she was all cleaned up....  I'm like slow your horses, lady.  I may not even call/text anyone until I've rested for 12 hours after....
  • @mytrueloves I would have lost my mind reading that. My parents are both remarried to wonderful people who I love and who play active roles in DD's life, and they don't even consider themselves to be her grandparents. That lady is crazy. 
  • @mytrueloves She is clearly in her own world. I don't know what I would have done if I saw that level of delusion bound and printed.
  • @mytrueloves YIKES!! I don't even know what to say to that level of crazy!  Man...
  • I've never met this woman but a few years ago I had to delete my Facebook because I found out she was somehow stealing pictures of ODD from my page and sharing them on HER page. 
  • @mytrueloves are you serious!?  Taking pictures off your FB?? Who does that!?!? Now that is a new level of crazy.
    Me:29 DH:30
    TTC #1: 12/2017
  • This morning my mother informed me that if she is at work when I go into labor she is leaving work and having my brother drive her to the hospital. I told her no and that we'd play it by ear. I also told her she'd be more helpful at home watching DS.

     I didnt let anyone at the hospital until after the baby was born last time, which happened to be nearly midnight, and she didn't come up until 6 PM the next day (her choice not mine). I DO NOT, under any circumstances, want her there while in in labor. Now she bitching and complaining to my youngest brother because I said she could come up to the hospital after the baby is born and DS has met her and we had times together.

     She has some serious boundary issues and I just dont have the patience to deal with it anymore. 
  • @nmadjeski that is a boundary issue for sure. Not the same but my mom said something similar about taking Friday off for the c section and being there and I said why dont you work till noon since I'm not sure how long I'll be in recovery or when I'm ready for visitors and I'd like some time with just DH and I and the babies before we have people come up. She was so upset and has tried guilting me on numerous occasions since then!? She claims it's not about meeting the babies right off but that I'm going through a procedure and shes my mom so she wants to be there for me if something happens. First they wont let her in the OR and second there is physically nothing she can do if something were to happen. I finally told her if it's that big of a deal just sit in the waiting room and she said "no you dont want me there so I wont come until you call" so wtf are you giving me such a hard time for!??!?! 

    Sorry that became a rant... lol I love my mom, shes been amazing this entire pregnancy but shes the last person I expected to get a hard time from and it's really bothering me. I see where shes coming from but If we didnt live with her then we wouldnt have told anyone when we were going into the hospital at all until after the babies are here so it sucks that I'm getting pushback on it
  • My in-laws live out of state,  but have decided to buy a vacation home about an hour from where we live.  (which fine, they have every right to do so)  But my MIL said that part of this deal is that she gets my son one week of every month.  To which i straight up laughed in husband's face.  There is no way that woman is taking my toddler away from me 25% of the time.  How is this a bargaining chip?  I didn't ask you to move here.  My husband said i am overreacting and just being emotional/tying to start a fight.  i told him to ask any mom what they would do in that situation.  Needless to say, he called his dad the next day to control that woman, but COME ON. I'm too pregnant for this.   
  • @jengibre_zorro a week seems like alot...what about one night or a weekend...why is she going straight for an entire week?
  • What deal? She moves and wants your son...what do you get?? No mom would be okay giving their son up for a WEEK! DHs ex would expect my in-laws to take SS one weekend a month. Um, no. It's one thing for a monthly overnight or agree upon visiting so often.  
  • @jengibre_zorro hahahaha! Nope. Not happening. My parents live 20 minutes away and maybe get my kids one night a month. Or when we have something going on, they’ll babysit. But they don’t get to take my kids for a week just because. Hell no. I didn’t have these kids to give them up to someone else for any amount of time. 
  • @jengibre_zorro yeah, no, that would never happen here. A whole week!?!? Every month!?! I would be pissed! Like you said, you didn’t ask her to buy a house there or help out at all so no, she does not get to demand time with your kid!
    Me:29 DH:30
    TTC #1: 12/2017
  • @mamabearcj exactly. I didnt think it would be an issue coming from her, especially since this isnt the first time we've done this. She's stressful and panics over everything. I cont handle her being there. The only reason she'll know I'm in labor is because we live with her this time around. Last time she called me 4 hours after I had my son complaining about all the things that were going wrong in her life. Nope, not happening this time around!

    @jengibre_zorro that's some sense of entitlement! Theres no way I'd be willing to agree to that and I'd probably be upset with my husband for thinking I was just trying to start a fight. 
  • @jengibre_zorro i echo everyone else's sentiments...seriously?! sorry that you even have to deal with that. 
  • @jengibre_zorro oh hell no! Yeah not going to fly with me either. That's nutso!!
  • @jengibre_zorro good for you! Standing your ground
  • Just annoyed with my MIL. We told her the baby’s name a few months ago, asked her to keep it secret as we were only telling parents at that time, and telling a select group of people, close friends and family at the baby showers. So my husband calls his brother this week to share the names, and turns out MIL had told him the names like 2 months ago! I heard from another totally random person about knowing the name as well. She’s always been a handful, but things have been amping up lately and my husband has had to give her a talk several times now about expectations and boundaries. 

    I’m just super annoyed because it totally isn’t her place to tell anyone, least of all because we told her explicitly it was meant to be kept to herself! 

    So yeah, we are now planning accordingly, not sharing photo, stats or anything like that with we until we share and are ready to share with the world. She’s not finding out Jack until after the baby is born! Also, telling her explicitly she’s not to share any photos etc. of the kid on Facebook. 
  • @dash83 that is super frustrating! I'm sorry you didnt get the joy of telling family and friends your babies name. I think its smart to keep her out of the loop until your ready for the world to know about the birth! If she can't keep something as simple as a name to herself she wouldnt be able to keep the announcement secret either, she can find out when everyone else does.
  • Uhhhh idk if MIL lost her mind or what.. I asked her when she was planning to come up tomorrow since well obviously be in the hosptial and my parents will be as well (MIL is staying at my parents while were in the hospital) she said she wasnt sure yet she wanted to see SIL who's coming home from college for the weekend, but MIL wanted to see her since shes "really sick" but it's okay because MIL bought a mask?!?!?!?!?! Fucking what!?!?! Then asked if she'd sti be able to see the babies tomorrow... I said idk. I told DH and hes not very impressed either but his lunch break isnt long enough to call and talk to her so I'm hoping he says something when he gets out of work... 
  • @mamabearcj I would tell her not a chance in hell! If she wants to see her, she can either  do so AFTER seeing the babies and then not again until you can be sure she isn't carrying germs/contagious. Or she can go see her and then not see babies for a week or so *shrug* her call. She has obviously lost her damn mind! Honestly if you can't count on him 100% sdoing something about it after work, I would text her letting her know it's totally not ok to expose your newborns to Neptune knows what because "she bought a mask". Hard nope. Sorry people are ridiculous!
  • @jomama1618 we told her we'd like her to come up before SIL gets home so she doesnt get the germs. She agreed that was best so thankfully it all worked out and she is currently getting baby snugs!
  • @mamabearcj glad she seems to have recovered some of her lost mind! LOL
  • So my mother was complaining about how nervous SHE WAS when I was in labor last time. I told her she made me super nervous and was not comforting, she was not happy. Basically, after I had been at the hospital about 12 hours and tried unsuccessfully pushing for several house, she came to sit with me while DH got lunch. I was terrified of having a C section and frustrated that it was taking so long. She had nothing comforting to say and when H came back I was in tears.  My Dad chimed in and said that what I needed was support and she got mad and stormed out.
  • @cdepperschmidt go your dad! 
    DS  12-1-2014
    DD 10-29-2016
    #3 due 10-13-2018
  • @cdepperschmidt I'm sorry she's being a jerk! I will never understand people that make someone else's labor about them! I hope she is far away from your labor this time!!!
    My fear of people pulling this crap makes me glad no one found out we were there until after he was born (but I was lucky and had a short labor after my water broke, and I waited til my water broke to go to the hospital. Lol) 

    People have started attempting to invite them selves or trying to convince/guilt me into inviting them to the hospital while I'm in labor. No one was even informed I was in labor,going to the hospital OR having him until a little after he was born. So why in the hell would I let all you freakin people impede this time?! Because it's a girl?! I knew this crap was going to happen! (A lot of family and friends, especially his side, and a handful of my step dad's side, (on their side i believe it's because 

    ***TRIGGER*** my (step)Dad's sister passed at 11 days from a heart defect among other things.
    ***END TRIGGER***)

    Hold girls of much higher importance/the Golden children over the boys. And since L will be the first girl on his side in awhile, and the first girl grand child/great grandchild, it is just bringing out the crazy more...)

    Not an ice cube's chance in hell that's happening! I'm so annoyed by all the antics starting, and it's not even October 1st yet *sigh*
    I have already informed DH that anyone that makes a difference between our kids because one is xx and one xy, will stop seeing our kids until they can act right and I'm ok seeing them again. (Thankfully he sees the crazy for what it is and whole heartedly agrees.)
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