UO 8/23

mamakate1616

 

mamakate1616

I hate current fashion trends. Give me full length pants without holes and shirts that don’t come down to my knees!! 

lelkcot

On the subject of fashion, I despise crop-tops. They flatter no one.

meggyme

@mamakate1616 @lelkcot I hate that the 90's fashion is back. I didn't think it was that flattering (unless you were a stick figure) even in the 90's

ETA: I also don't understand the cold shoulder shirts. If I need to be wearing a long sleeve shirt, I want my shoulders covered because it's f-ing cold outside!

dtspmama

@meggyme OH MAN.  I am THRILLED that the 90s are back.  I'm leaning hard into the grunge attire of my youth.  GIVE ME ALL OF THE PLAID THINGS.

lelkcot

@dtspmama plaid is always a good idea!

meggyme

@dtspmama plaid, sure. Plaid is a fun fall pattern. But plaid flannel tied around the waist, nah. Or the god awful dresses meant to look like you have a sweatshirt tied around your waist. No.

mayoduck

I hate that the 90s 'are back' because it reminds me that the 90s were 2 decades ago 

UO: I never understood the 'smash cake' for one-year-olds trend. Is there a reason we don't just give 1-year-olds a cupcake? This seems easier, cheaper, and less wasteful, no? STMs feel free to correct me on this if I'm missing something.

HoneyBear40

@mayoduck I've seen cupcakes. But, you know, picture opportunities with a mess of frosting just "need" to be done  
I'm one of those moms that did a smash cake but our local grocery store actually includes a mini cake for free if you order birthday cupcakes or cake and say it's for a first birthday.

lelkcot

@meggyme that dress is just too much! 

mayoduck

@HoneyBear40 Huh! Maybe it's the crowds I roll with then; I've only seen smash cakes given. That's awesome you got a one for free!

I did go to one 1-year-olds party where his smash cake had bright red frosting and watching him go at it was both hilarious and horrifying because he the red all over his mouth made him look like a tiny cast member from The Walking Dead! Lol. Now THAT'S a photographic moment!

meggyme

My mom had a smash cake for DD's 1st bday with family, but for her actual birthday I let her go to town on a big chunk of watermelon. I might have done a cupcake if my mom hadn't done something, but it would only be because I'd made cupcakes for her bday and that was the one she was getting.

I don't understand big birthdays for kids in general. I have better ways to spend a couple hundred (if not more) dollars than on theme decorations and party favors for a bunch of other people's children.

dtspmama

@meggyme but if I don't tie my plaid shirt around my waist where will it go (I live in FL, lord knows I'm not wearing it!).  LMAO.

That dress is terrible.  

bdesterhouse

@mayoduck we did a smash cake because it was free and came with the full size cake we bought for guests. Friends I know have done both cupcakes or smash cakes. The smash cakes where I live are pretty small, maybe a double cupcake size. Makes for a fun mess that's for sure. 

mayoduck

Well! TIL: Smash cakes can be obtained for free! I'm shocked people don't exploit this.

shinyobjects

meggyme said:

@mamakate1616 @lelkcot I hate that the 90's fashion is back. I didn't think it was that flattering (unless you were a stick figure) even in the 90's

ETA: I also don't understand the cold shoulder shirts. If I need to be wearing a long sleeve shirt, I want my shoulders covered because it's f-ing cold outside!

Omg all of this!! I always though acid wash, (especially on high waist jeans), crop tops, and chunky heels were poor choices the first time around! And I really don’t get the cold shoulder, just looks so dumb to me. 

lovesclimbing

We had a cake and cupcakes and only gave a cupcake to our daughter for her first birthday. Why waste all that perfectly good cake on a baby? She ate all the frosting, but only a couple bites of the cake part.

Plus one to the trends of today. Everything is baggy and loose, and it's so unflattering on most people. High waisted pants just emphasize a poochy belly when you sit down. Baggy/flowy/loose tops just do away with any waist you might have and make you look huge. Clothes that SKIM the body look flattering and won't make you look bigger than you are. I can't wait until the baggy trend is over. I buy that stuff because there isn't much of a choice, and then I take it in so it actually fits. 

AFM: I'll go controversial. When we get a dog, it will be from a breeder. I don't feel one bit bad, and I think it's the right way to go. 

meggyme

@lovesclimbing is that because you like a particular breed or would want a puppy? Because both are often available by breed specific rescues and shelters.

Lbloom

My UO: Driveby posts don't get under my skin. - I guess it has to do with my being an "old timer" to the Bump and I remember what it used to be like, i.e. a lot less structured. But you know, I think it also used to be less civilized!  I think we've got a good mix here on this board. We have fun, interesting regulars here and everybody is very civil to the Noobs who come here without a clue! I guess in my naivete, I imagine someone who is completely new to TB, comes here scared or frightened, finds a seemingly friendly group and decides to branch out and create a thread. When that person is immediately told there are "rules" to follow on this free and public internet forum (however, everyone is told very politely), they get scared away and never come back thinking we are a bunch of meanies. Maybe my imagined scenario is way off, and they feel welcome and stay - or maybe they never meant to stick around in the first place and in that case, see ya! Whatevs, it doesn't happen very often, but my heart goes out a bit to some people that seem genuinely sad or scared. I guess I'm a softie.

P.S. These sentiments do NOT apply to obvious "worms"

P.P.S - on the previous posts: 90s fashion is generally horrible, "cold-shoulder" shirts scream of a fad that everyone will hate seeing themselves in pictures in a few years, and smash cakes for 1 year olds seem like overkill to me too. (Especially if they have black/and or red frosting like a recent one I saw).

lovesclimbing

meggyme said:

@lovesclimbing is that because you like a particular breed or would want a puppy? Because both are often available by breed specific rescues and shelters.

It's a combination of both those things and other reasons, such as issues I have with shelter policies. But, I've kept a regular eye on the shelters in the areas near where I live and where I lived previously for several years, and I can with certainty say that, no, particular breeds I'm looking for (retriever-type) and especially puppies are rarely, if ever, available. And with the experiences I've had, I refuse to bring a grown dog with a history I don't know into a home with young children. 

batmama31

@Lbloom, I totally agree!! I've been on the internet for a long time now. and while I didn't participate on these message boards ages ago, I have quite a bit of experience on message boards in general, back when ICQ was still the preferred method of IM-ing. I, too, sometimes find the rules a bit too rigid. 

my UO: there are too many damn rules around baby showers. you can't throw your own, you can't have more than one, no boys allowed, no booze allowed (which is just rude, in my opinion), rude to ask or not ask for books, but you're expected to have a registry. *insert the hardest eye-rolling emoji here* if I did any of this, and someone judged me, I wouldn't want them having anything to do w/ me or my baby anyway. 

my SIL just threw her own shower, swollen feet and all, and I for one am so proud of her for just doing what she wants and throwing all judgement to the wind (except the judgement from her MIL for opening her presents w/o her)

mamaoftwomonkeys

My UO: Babies shouldn’t have cake. We refused to allow our daughter to have any cake at all on her first birthday. We don’t let babies have coffee because caffeine isn’t good for them, so we didn’t let her have a pile of sugar either! (The grandparents were disappointed, haha). She can have cake when she’s older and knows it’s a special treat.

@meggyme plus one on the anti cold shoulder look! 

lovesclimbing

mamaoftwomonkeys said:

My UO: Babies shouldn’t have cake. We refused to allow our daughter to have any cake at all on her first birthday. We don’t let babies have coffee because caffeine isn’t good for them, so we didn’t let her have a pile of sugar either! (The grandparents were disappointed, haha). She can have cake when she’s older and knows it’s a special treat.

@meggyme plus one on the anti cold shoulder look! 

I mostly agree with you. The cupcake on her birthday was the first time she had any amount of sugar. And she has had very little since. I agree that babies in general shouldn't have sugar, but to me, it was a special one time treat.

Ditto about grandparents. We have stayed with my in-laws a couple stints this summer and my MiL will talk about how "it's only a tiny bit of sugar" "just enough take the tart off." I've seen what she calls a tiny bit of sugar in berries for ice cream topping, for example, it's not a little hi or sugar. (It's ice cream topping, for pete's sake. It doesn't need ANY sugar. There's plenty already in the ice cream.) Or she makes homemade juice and adds sugar "just to take the tart off." If my children have any juice growing up (and it won't be a lot), it will be from concentrate only, no sugar added. Even cranberry juice I've drank straight. It's not that tart! 

indigoheightsblog

@Lbloom @batmama31 I am SO with you on the drive-bys! Sometimes these people get totally unecessary reactions. Either they are flat out rude, or curt and directive.... but even curt and directive, while not MEAN, comes off a bit cold. So count me in as a softie too! 

@lovesclimbing I'm alllllll about a dog breeder! I loathe pet stores, and I can rarely find what I'm looking for in a shelter. Whenever I visit shelters, if I find what I'm looking for, I hear about their history or some outstanding issue and it's immediately a "no". However, my husband's dog (which is obviously now our dog) is a 9 year old rescue that he got a 4 months and she is my whole wide world. My brother just rescued a pup and she's a doll. Nothing against rescues, I'm just a breeder gal myself. And on that note - i met, bought and paid for my pup at the breeder's house tonight!!!! He's adorable. Can't wait to have him home on September 2nd. 

My UO: Babies/kids should absolutely be allowed to have (a little) sugar every once in a while. Everything in moderation is key, and I think withholding treats at special events like their own birthday is a control thing. I also think that a child could build up quite the complex around food if this is how rigidly their snacks are monitored. 

lovesclimbing

indigoheightsblog said:

*snip*

@lovesclimbing I'm alllllll about a dog breeder! I loathe pet stores, and I can rarely find what I'm looking for in a shelter. Whenever I visit shelters, if I find what I'm looking for, I hear about their history or some outstanding issue and it's immediately a "no". However, my husband's dog (which is obviously now our dog) is a 9 year old rescue that he got a 4 months and she is my whole wide world. My brother just rescued a pup and she's a doll. Nothing against rescues, I'm just a breeder gal myself. And on that note - i met, bought and paid for my pup at the breeder's house tonight!!!! He's adorable. Can't wait to have him home on September 2nd. 

*snip* 

Yup, especially the bolded. I'm not against adopting from a shelter (except some shelters with insanely stupid and prohibitive policies), they just never have what I'm looking for. I regularly check shelter websites in cities when I've lived there and nearby and also visit, and 75-100% (no, I'm not exaggerating; sometimes it truly has been 100%!) of the dogs will actually have in their bio that they can't be in a home with young children or that they need a two-dog home. So there goes the vast majority of potential pets right off the bat because I have a 1-year-old and am pregnant and, and we don't want two dogs. I will not risk an unknown or difficult-historied dog with infants and young children in the house. Unfortunately, I've had a lot of negative experiences with shelter dogs. I'm absolutely not saying all shelter dogs are bad dogs, and I'm not saying that shelter dogs that bite or can't be around young children or whatever because of past abuse are bad dogs. I just won't risk having that in my home with young children, and I believe it would be irresponsible and bad parenting for me to bring that into my home. And a few weeks or a few years or (in the case of some friends of mine, many years) of good ownership does not outweigh the behaviors caused by past abuse and bad circumstances. 

mamaoftwomonkeys

@lovesclimbing @indigoheightsblog Let me clarify: I think there’s a time and a place for special treats and that time is when they will remember them. A one year old doesn’t know the difference really what they were given, really the cake is just for our pictures and social norms. But if you look at how much sugar American kids consume compared to the rest of the world it’s no wonder so many kids are obese! Don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to be controlling and say my 6 year old can’t have birthday cake with their friends. But if I can help set my kids palate to not need added sugar then I think that’s a good thing. If another Mom wants to let their kid have sugary snacks every once in a while I’m not gonna judge but I think it’s a weird social norm that I’m expected to give my one year old cake!

maggiemadeit

My daughter didn’t get cake on her first birthday, but got a special mini cupcake on her second. She was delighted, but mostly because she got to share them with her friends. Since then she will occasionally get a square of chocolate as a special treat. My MIL has tried to give her ice cream and juice several times, but she doesn’t like either. 

I definitely agree with not loading kids with sugar, but I also think at 2.5 she can understand when something is special now.

My husband is also a lot more lax than I am about this, and will take her for a donut every now and again, which I really don’t approve of. But it’s their own special thing so I stay out of it. 

My UO: donuts are gross. Even before I had celiacs I didn’t eat them. I just don’t see the appeal. 

mayoduck

@lovesclimbing That's totally a valid reason to be wary of shelter dogs; many of them need special attention and care. You can still get a breeder dog if you want but shelters also get pregnant dogs in ALL the time, which means you can get a puppy born into the care of the shelter with no history of abuse or abandonment. If it's important to you to get a particular breed, though, that's much trickier.

mayoduck

@maggiemadeit YES! I thought I was the only one who didn't like donuts! I think fried dough or breading in general tastes weird. No for me on funnel cakes, fried ice cream, fried Oreos, or any of that stuff.

lovesclimbing

mayoduck said:

@lovesclimbing That's totally a valid reason to be wary of shelter dogs; many of them need special attention and care. You can still get a breeder dog if you want but shelters also get pregnant dogs in ALL the time, which means you can get a puppy born into the care of the shelter with no history of abuse or abandonment. If it's important to you to get a particular breed, though, that's much trickier.

Like I said, this has not been my experience. Maybe if I spent hundreds on airfare and hotel costs to travel to a large city outside of Alaska. 

I rarely, rarely see puppies at shelters here in Alaska. Everyone wants puppies (understandable!), and they are hard to find. The shelter in the last place I lived for over two years did not once have puppies. Once that I recall for sure, perhaps twice, in two years they had a litter of kittens, never puppies. In my experience, people don't drop off litters of puppies or pregnant dogs at shelters. They keep them and give them away or sell them. 

And yes, I do also care about breed and don't want a surprise that my dog needs, say, way more running around then we expected or want because the shelter didn't know it was part husky. 

keikilove

This is going to sound horrible, but here in Hawai’i we have been preparing for Hurricane Lane for three days, and it is SO BORING. Nothing has happened. There are some clouds and we got a bit of rain today. That’s it. But school has been cancelled for three days & all the stores, movies, restaurants have been closed. We are all locked up in our homes with NOTHING going on outside. Suuuuuper boring. Yes, better safe than sorry, but these newscasters overhyping everything is getting really old. 

And ditto to everyone on the 90s clothing. It looked terrible back then! Leave it in the 90s!

Also fashion-related: peep-toe boots and open-heeled boots are so dumb! Why wear boots if you want your tootsies out like you’re wearing a sandal?! 

dtspmama

@keikilove F2F was 2 weeks old when we were but by Irma. It felt like all we did was wait for weeks and then . . . Nothing. I know how how you're feeling!