Pregnant after Stillbirth

courtneys83

Hey ladies! I just got my BFP today at 9dpo. I am so excited, but so scared at the same time. I lost my baby girl March 15th at 32 weeks due to a true knot in her cord. I am really hoping that this is for real!! We have been trying since we lost her, and every month since has been so devastating for us! Praying for my rainbow EDD 4-21-19 

luckywife10

courtneys83 said:

Hey ladies! I just got my BFP today at 9dpo. I am so excited, but so scared at the same time. I lost my baby girl March 15th at 32 weeks due to a true knot in her cord. I am really hoping that this is for real!! We have been trying since we lost her, and every month since has been so devastating for us! Praying for my rainbow EDD 4-21-19 

Hi OP, please read the Board Organization thread pinned at the top of this board and introduce yourself in the intro thread before posting. Feel free to jump into the daily threads once your have done so. One-off posts are discouraged as they clutter the board.

courtneys83

Wow this app has changed a lot! I’m outta here 

MRDCle

courtneys83 said:

Wow this app has changed a lot! I’m outta here 

QFP - well that was super quick AND OUR OFFICIAL FIRST GBCB - bravo A19. 

gollygeeitsamy

@courtneys83 Congratulations! I'm hoping you'll join us there are some really nice ladies here so far. We have weekly & daily threads where you can participate. 

luckywife10

@courtneys83 TB definitely has changed! It's hard to keep up with what is current, that's why we are redirecting to/reminding new comers of the Board Organization thread which will help make things more clear. I'll add to what gollygeeitsamy said, this board has been very welcoming and helpful. Everyone is very excited to be here! 

justaplainbagel

I mean...I'm sorry to hear about the loss and everything...but if you think that was harsh enough to leave then I'm sorry you're sensitive. Wish you luck.

jrm_14

**lurking** (bc #IF) 

Put it yourself in shoes of OP, who had her infant die inside of her & make a mistake about posting a thread. How welcoming does it seem to tell her only about the mistake & no “so sorry for your loss, just a heads up....”. Be a compassionate human first, then worry about where to post what. 

OP, so sorry for you loss. This pregnancy seems to be so full of hope & yet so sorrowful. Best wishes. 

ETA: I will be at the front of the line to defend how wonderful & supportive women on TB can be. Just, have some compassion. And if you do, consider not  invalidating it by telling someone they shouldn’t feel a certain way to a reaction post-lost. 

galactickates

Lurking as well - a loss mom

nottodaysatan said:

I mean...I'm sorry to hear about the loss and everything...but if you think that was harsh enough to leave then I'm sorry you're sensitive. Wish you luck.

^^^^ This is just cruel

I second @jrm_14 's sentiment. 

I was in complete shock at how OP was treated in this thread.  PGAL brain is a beast of its own, if you haven't experienced it then pray you never have to and if you have and you STILL treated her the way that you did shame on you.  

@courtneys83 I am so incredibly sorry for what you have been through.  There is a private PGAL group on TB I can see if you can join.  PM me if interested. I am sorry you've been treated this way. 

justaplainbagel

To clarify, the sensitive comment was about her reaction to being told about the board organization. Was not in reference to anything else other than that. If it came off that way, I apologize courtney. 
It's hard to convey a mood behind a typed message and I guess mine came off really wrong so. I'm sorry. 
Edit: I do realize it was a poor choice of words and I should have thought through that statement better. 

BitterBetty12

nottodaysatan said:

To clarify, the sensitive comment was about her reaction to being told about the board organization. Was not in reference to anything else other than that. If it came off that way, I apologize courtney. 
It's hard to convey a mood behind a typed message and I guess mine came off really wrong so. I'm sorry. 
Edit: I do realize it was a poor choice of words and I should have thought through that statement better. 

**dirty lurker**

I imagine she would be quite sensitive about being re-directed when the first response to her heart-breaking post about losing her daughter was one telling her that she shouldn't have posted. There are much gentler ways to introduce someone who has been through such a traumatic experience to the culture of the board.

I pray none of you have to experience the heartbreak of a loss - but please please reconsider how you respond to loss mom's who reach out here for support. Losing a child is a pain unlike any other.

galactickates

MRDCle said:

courtneys83 said:

Wow this app has changed a lot! I’m outta here 

QFP - well that was super quick AND OUR OFFICIAL FIRST GBCB - bravo A19. 

And celebrating their GBCB is seriously sick

MRDCle

galactickates said:

MRDCle said:

courtneys83 said:

Wow this app has changed a lot! I’m outta here 

QFP - well that was super quick AND OUR OFFICIAL FIRST GBCB - bravo A19. 

And celebrating their GBCB is seriously sick

I'd hardly call it celebrating - I was taken aback. I came in to offer support and she was gone before I could even say anything. I'm sorry if my intent was misunderstood. 

ETA: And I do apologize to OP.  I should have offered support regardless of if you said you were leaving or not. If you do come back, I am truly sorry for your loss.

lindsye

*lurking*

Lurking because I was actively involved in the April ‘18 BMB and though we have since moved to Facebook, am feeling very nostalgic about the pregnancy journey we went on together beginning around this time last year. This was my fourth (and last) baby and the first time I had the pleasure of being actively involved in a BMB. The BMB experience of going through 9 months of pregnancy and now new babies with this group of women was (and is) such a wonderful experience.

OP, please don’t let a few (very) insensitive comments related to your past experience dissuade your from experiencing this. I am so sorry for your loss - any loss is hard beyond words but I truly can’t imagine experiencing one at 32 weeks.

danjoly

Wow some April19 girls had their head up their butts when empathy was distributed... 
Any loss is terrible but a late loss is tragic and all you care about is your board organization clap clap clap!

MRDCle

@danjoly we certainly did. Once again, I am sorry. I know I personally will be more conscientious and practice more empathy going forward 

BarefootContessa

Hey OP. Welcome. I’m so so sorry to hear of your loss with your daughter in March. I lost my son at 22 weeks in December and it’s a very unique grief to bear. I hope that at some point you do feel welcome to come back and join us. Congratulations on your BFP, and a happy and healthy nine months to you, dear!

ladythrice

Dirty lurker active in two BMBs from TB...

"@Courtneys83 Congratulations on your pregnancy!!! I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss. Welcome to the April 19 board, please consider checking in with fellow PGAL ladies in our weekly PGAL check-in thread. ❤"

Hey April 19. Fixed that for you.

SLC1102

luckywife10 said:

courtneys83 said:

Hey ladies! I just got my BFP today at 9dpo. I am so excited, but so scared at the same time. I lost my baby girl March 15th at 32 weeks due to a true knot in her cord. I am really hoping that this is for real!! We have been trying since we lost her, and every month since has been so devastating for us! Praying for my rainbow EDD 4-21-19 

Hi OP, please read the Board Organization thread pinned at the top of this board and introduce yourself in the intro thread before posting. Feel free to jump into the daily threads once your have done so. One-off posts are discouraged as they clutter the board.

A 19....Way to have SO MUCH COMPASSION.

JFC.  Congratulations Courtney, I'm SO incredibly sorry for your loss, I can't imagine what you went through.  May your rainbow baby be everything you've dreamed of and more.

/an D14 and A18 mom

ImGlassy

“One off post are discouraged as they clutter the board”

There is absolutely nothing one off about child loss. What a disgusting lack of empathy you are promoting in your “community”. 

@courtneys83 I hope you do come back and look at this post. 

Congradulations, I can’t imagine how nervous you are. I’m sure your little girl is watching over her sibling and cheering you on. I’ll keep you in my prayers! 

SLC1102

MRDCle said:

courtneys83 said:

Wow this app has changed a lot! I’m outta here 

QFP - well that was super quick AND OUR OFFICIAL FIRST GBCB - bravo A19. 

Be ashamed of yourself.  

lindsye

BarefootContessa said:

Hey OP. Welcome. I’m so so sorry to hear of your loss with your daughter in March. I lost my son at 22 weeks in December and it’s a very unique grief to bear. I hope that at some point you do feel welcome to come back and join us. Congratulations on your BFP, and a happy and healthy nine months to you, dear!

@BarefootContessa so happy to see you here! Wishing you a H&H 9 months also.

ladythrice

lindsye said:

BarefootContessa said:

Hey OP. Welcome. I’m so so sorry to hear of your loss with your daughter in March. I lost my son at 22 weeks in December and it’s a very unique grief to bear. I hope that at some point you do feel welcome to come back and join us. Congratulations on your BFP, and a happy and healthy nine months to you, dear!

@BarefootContessa so happy to see you here! Wishing you a H&H 9 months also.

DITTTTOOOOOOO @BarefootContessa!!! So incredibly happy for you.

MRDCle

SLC1102 said:

MRDCle said:

courtneys83 said:

Wow this app has changed a lot! I’m outta here 

QFP - well that was super quick AND OUR OFFICIAL FIRST GBCB - bravo A19. 

Be ashamed of yourself.  

 I am.  While my intent was not celebratory I see how it could be interpreted that way.  What I said was gross and truly lacking sympathy.  I am sorry.

SLC1102

MRDCle said:

SLC1102 said:

MRDCle said:

courtneys83 said:

Wow this app has changed a lot! I’m outta here 

QFP - well that was super quick AND OUR OFFICIAL FIRST GBCB - bravo A19. 

Be ashamed of yourself.  

 I am.  While my intent was not celebratory I see how it could be interpreted that way.  What I said was gross and truly lacking sympathy.  I am sorry.

That's very big of you, I'm glad you see how horrid a response like that is.

sapphires-and-diamonds

ladythrice said: 

lindsye said:

BarefootContessa said:

Hey OP. Welcome. I’m so so sorry to hear of your loss with your daughter in March. I lost my son at 22 weeks in December and it’s a very unique grief to bear. I hope that at some point you do feel welcome to come back and join us. Congratulations on your BFP, and a happy and healthy nine months to you, dear!

@BarefootContessa so happy to see you here! Wishing you a H&H 9 months also.

DITTTTOOOOOOO @BarefootContessa!!! So incredibly happy for you.

So happy for you @BarefootContessa!! Hoping for a smooth and happy 9 months.

mermaidca

@courtneys83 I am so sorry to hear about your loss and want to wish you a big congratulations on this baby.  I really hope you do stick around with us.  Add yourself to the spreadsheet and jump in when you're ready! 

BarefootContessa

@lindsye, @sapphires-and-diamonds, @ladythrice Thanks Ladies!

irenejean

Also so happy for you @BarefootContessa! Hoping for a smooth pregnancy for you ❤️

mels823

@courtneys83 reading your post just breaks my heart! I’m sorry for the not so warm welcome you received. We are ALL here to support one another. I hope you decide to come back so we can help support you along the way!!