TTCAL Week of 6/25/18

char245

1. Introduce yourself (if new):
2. Status?
3. R/R:
4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better? 

char245

2. 7 DPO, just waiting to POAS...
3. Just got back from a week at the beach with my family, it was amazing!! Hoping it’s not too hard to get back I tom our routine today.
4. Coffee! All the coffee! My husband doesn’t drink it, he doesn’t like the taste. I cannot understand that at all lol.

prpl11butterfly

2. Status? TWW/5dpo

3. R/R: blah. I was an irritable b$^%$ all weekend and seems the pattern is continuing today. God help these salesmen at work.... Weather is crap and I'm disappointed I didn't get to wear my pretty new dress (seriously, I fell asleep so excited and woke up to rain). I upset DH last night by telling him I feel like this isn't the month. He begged me to be positive for him but I just cant. I've been feeling dull uncomfortableness (not really crampy, just there) since 2dpo. That's not normal and likely cant be a good sign 

4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better? I'm with char245 on the coffee but also, when my brows look fab. 

@char245 I don't think I could bounce back quickly from a beach vacation. Glad you enjoyed it!

catlady2015

2. Status? WTO
3. R/R: First AF after blighted ovum. It's heavier and crampier than usual. day 2 is usually the worst, so hoping it eases up tomorrow. In the meantime, I have the heating pad, naproxen, and ice cream. we're going to be best friends today!
4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better? well, the aforementioned ice cream. Kitties cuddling in my lap. Phone calls from my dad. Spontaneous affection from DH (non-sex related). 

Mack2342

2. Status? Not sure.  Last two days peak OPKs low today but temp drop this morning.  Not sure if it’s bc I was up from 2-3 this morning or bc I didn’t actually O.  If I see a temp spike tomorrow I will assume I Od on Sunday and say temp wonky bc of early wake up. 
3. R/R: we leave for vacay this Friday for a week! 
4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better? Diet Coke 

@char I’m with your DH I hate the taste of coffee

@prpl11butterfly I hope you start to feel better.  This journey really does suck.  

@catlady2015 hope AF gets better soon

Kath525

1. Introduce yourself (if new): ttc since 1/17. CP 3/17. NMC 9/17.
2. Status? WTO CD 8
3. R/R: We're on vacation in the smoky mountains. It's beautiful!
4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better? Hot chocolate in the winter, strawberry lemonade in the summer

coco2787

1. Introduce yourself (if new):
Recently returned.  2 CPs and 2 MMC.

2. Status?
Benched post D&C.  Going crazy waiting for answers.

3. R/R:
Dear diary ahead.
We went to the funeral home on Friday to sign some paperwork and answer some questions, it was horrible.  Just one of those places/situations you'd never imagine finding yourself.  Questions about urns and obituaries and memorial services and a name for our baby.  And then they wanted to know if we wanted to be there when they do the cremation (you don't see anything, just accompany the body on their "final journey") and it was just all too much.  They'll probably call me today or tomorrow since I wasn't really able to give them any answers that day.  I still haven't decided if I want to be there or not, but I feel like I should, or would regret it if I didn't.  I just don't know if my heart can handle it.  
In sort of good news, I have an RE appointment tomorrow and I hope there's something she can say or do to make me feel better about this situation.  I wasn't planning on going so soon but there was an opening and this benched/limbo/WTF time is driving me insane so I need to feel like I'm doing something.  They have a psychiatrist on staff at the RE office that specializes in IF/loss, I should probably see about talking to her too.  

4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better?
Definitely coffee.  Also my dog greeting me at the end of the day.  

justarius

1. Introduce yourself (if new): new-ish I guess, intro’d way before - MMC May 2/18 - 8wks 3days
2. Status? Waiting for AF to stop, CD 7 and last dose of femara. Second AF since the MMC - seems a bit much, hoping femara helps regulate my hormones. WTO once AF stops
3. R/R: keep ending up on shifts with my pregnant co-workers that I was supposed to be bump buddies with. Driving me to almost crying in the bathroom each shift like this. All my other co-workers keep asking things and talking about it! Oh when are you due? How many weeks? How did your family react? Like just seeing pregnant ladies isn’t hard enough. Grrrrr, don’t get me wrong happy for them, but fml!
4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better?  My dogs! Love them and 100% the coffee like char245 and prpl11butterfly 

@pr@prpl11butterfly I’m with you on the extreme crankiness I change moods in one day so many times DH can’t keep track, poor guy

@ma@Mack2342 hope you did O and the temp was just wonky - wish there was an easier way to tell these things! 

@ca@catlady2015 hope AF gets better! Brightside? At least AF came on it’s own? 

@Kath525 hurray for vacation!

@co@coco2787 I’m so sorry the funeral home was so horrible! Hope you find peace in this journey somehow! Good luck at the RE - hopefully gives you something to focus on and the psychiatrist is helpful! 

Edited trying to fix the tags - dunno wth sorry ladies

MelissaMay82

1. Introduce yourself (if new): New-is/Returner. 2 Losses (21 weeks and 5 weeks)

2. Status? 5 DPO but according to FF I'm supposed to start AF on 7/4 

3. R/R: Rave: I have an unexpected day off today and I have a vacation day tomorrow to go to a Red Sox game so this week I am only working on Friday (the joys of working 3 12s ). Rant: I can't really think of one other than I am clumsy and fell up the stairs and cracked my knee into the lip of the stair over the weekend and it is still hurts hahaha

4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better? Coffee!!!

@char245 and @prpl11butterfly totally agree with the coffee, it's the best part of the day
@catlady2015 Ice cream will definitely make it better, hope you feel better soon
@Mack2342 have fun on vacation
@Kath525 the smoky mountains are beautiful, enjoy your vacation
@coco2787 I'm so sorry, that must be so hard dealing with all the funeral home stuff, I can't even imagine.
@justarius there are a bunch of pregnant girls at my work as well. That can be so hard to listen to their conversations about pregnancy stuff, I try to avoid it as much as possible.

lelkcot

2. Status? TWW/3DPO
3. R/R: this is my first cycle post loss and I’ve been feeling off the whole time. Really wish I could have gotten in to see my dr sooner (appointment in mid July), but I’m going to have a serious list of questions once I finally get in!
4.GTKY: I’m with you @char245 & @prpl11butterfly – coffee is definitely a little thing that makes my life better! Also love fresh flowers, they just brighten up the house!

@catlady2015 hope af chills and you’re feeling better soon. I'm with you on ice cream fixing most things. 

@Mack2342 and @Kath525 yay for vacations! Have a blast! 

@coco2787 I’m so sorry the funeral home was so hard, I hope you find some peace in the coming weeks. Hopefully the appointment with the RE will help by giving you a plan to start working towards.

@justarius It’s tough to be around pregnant ladies, especially someone who is due around the same time you were, I’m sorry.

@MelissaMay82 yay for time off!

char245

@prpl11butterfly I’m sorry you’re having a rough couple of days! My husband also wants me to be positive but it’s just so hard sometimes!!
@catlady1215 I’m with you on the ice cream! I had some delicious Ben and Jerry’s last night, it’s the best!!
@Mack2342 I just feel so sorry for you non coffee drinkers lol. But a Diet Coke is pretty great! 
@Kath525 so jealous that you’re still on vacation, I just want to go back!!
@coco2787 I’m so sorry you are having to make those decisions, that’s incredibly hard! I hope your RE appointment goes well and that’s fabulous that they have a counselor on staff, what a great addition to a practice!
@justarius I also work with a lot
of pregnant ladies, it’s just so hard! I also am happy for them but once they start complaining about anything pregnancy related I want to scream!!
@MelissaMay82  yay for vacation days!
@LElkCot  I hope your appointment goes well and you can get all your questions answered!

40momma

2. Not new. Benched by myself for 1 month
3. R/R Had some extra bloodwork done ordered by my naturopath and tested mildly positive for a blood clotting syndrome (APS). With this studies show a 30% chance of a successful pregnancy, with treatment it gives a 70% chance of success. I guess that's better than 30% but still confusing and frustrating. 
4. DH squeezes my feet almost every morning to wake me up. Yes, I am spoiled  

@Mack2342 @Kath525 and @char245 You are all making me want a vacation!!

@coco2787 I am so sorry you have to make these decisions. None of this journey is fair

@justarius It's so hard trying to put on a smily happy face when you are hurting inside

olivemomma

2. Status? Currently on the bench after a MMC
3. R/R? Lots of travel coming up! Other than the heartache that brings me here life is pretty good right now.
4. GYKY? How is it no one has mentioned wine yet?? I love wine and am taking advantage while benched. Also agree on coffee!

bakerstreetboys

2. Status? TWW, last natural cycle before IVF.
3. R/R: We just had a long weekend, which was great.  I'm finding it hard to stay positive with our first IVF cycle coming up.  The stats are just not very friendly.  Pregnancy rate of 25% and miscarriage rate of 40%.   
4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better? I can't stand coffee, but I drink a lot of hot tea.  And yes to wine @olivemomma !!

@40momma It sounds like the treatment for the blood clotting disorder increases your chances significantly!  Still frustrating for sure though.
@kath525 @MelissaMay82 and @Mack2342 Enjoy your vacations!  I hope your temp st@MelissaMay82
@coco2787 I can't imagine how hard that was.  I hope your RE appointment goes well today.
@justarius Fx taht femara does the trick!
@LElkCot Definitely ask all the questions!  
 

MelissaMay82

@olivemomma Yes to wine (or beer or vodka sodas )! I am trying very hard to not drink right now during TWW.

lin0442

@bakerstreetboys FX for your current cycle, though if you have to move on to IVF I hope it goes smoothly for you and the odds turn in your favor

@40momma Sorry for the diagnosis, but it’s good that APS has some interventions that increase your chances- that’s a huge change in outcomes with proper meds and monitoring!

@olivemomma Ooh any travel destination you’re particularly excited for?

2. Status? WTO, 1st cycle of FSH/IUI, about a week until O. Jabbing myself with needles isn’t so bad I guess.
3. R/R: It’s been a busy week, socially and work-wise, but all I want to do is sleep lol. It feels weird being back in the TTC game after being benched.
4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better? There’s an ice cream shop right near my train station. I like to grab a small bowl and eat it on my front porch if it’s nice out (and/or if I have a rough day). I try to not make it too frequent a habit lol.

bakerstreetboys

@lin0442 Thank you  I must have missed a post; I didn't realize you were moving onto IUI.  Fx that it works for you!  It's not so much the needles that I'm dreading (though we'll see how I feel about it later), it's the egg retrieval that's keeping me up at night.  

lin0442

@bakerstreetboys You probably didn’t, I’ve been somewhat absent from the bump lately lol. After my septum surgery my doc said we might not really need to escalate to IUI, but since we’ve been trying for 2+ years she encouraged the boost in %. And yeah, egg retrieval sounds scary, but you’ve got to figure by this point you’re tough enough to get through it.

All the ladies on this board have been through so much. I’m always impressed by the strength and determination you all show, even when we collectively have our sad and vulnerable times.

char245

@bakerstreetboys don’t let it keep you up at night, I did it years ago for my sister and it wasn’t bad at all! You’re under sedation and you wake up a little crampy, no worse then all the other things we’ve been through! 

bakerstreetboys

Thanks @char245. Unfortunately mine won’t be done under sedation...I’ll just have an IV with fentanyl, which does nothing for me 

char245

@bakerstreetboys aww I’m sorry! Here’s hoping this is your month and you won’t need to worry about it!!

mwmiller4

1. Introduce yourself (if new): I intro’d awhile ago—finally off the bench and waiting to ovulate. MMC at like 9/10weeks in March (small for gestational age, slow heartbeat then no heartbeat) 
2. Status? Waiting to O! CD day 16 and 4th high day on the monitor so hopefully peak tomorrow! 
3. R/R: We just got back from a long weekend at my in laws that was so much fun! Looking forward to vacation in a month with them!
4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better? I millionth coffee and ice cream. Running toddler hugs and being able to binge watch Scandal during naps  

olivemomma

@lin0442 nothing too big or exciting but we are going to SLC this week - we lived there for a while and I always love going back. Then taking my kiddos to where I grew up to see their grandparents and then LA and San Diego. Should be fun!

coco2787

The RE appointment yesterday was fine, I don't feel like I got a ton of my questions answered, but mostly because everything I want to know is kind of putting the cart before the horse.  I go back next week to get a blood draw for AMH, prolactin, and karyotyping.  From what I understand elevated prolactin has been linked to miscarriage but it's not very definitive, and there are usually other signs if it's elevated, none of which I have.  I also know that AMH number is just a small part of the equation so not pinning too much hope on any of that info being helpful with deciding on a plan.  Maybe karyotyping will show something, but I'm not expecting them to find anything.  Kind of worried that all of this testing will just give us more questions than answers.  At this point I feel like my only hope is that the testing of the fetus will reveal something.  

catlady2015

@coco2787 - I'm sorry the RE appointment was a little underwhelming! not having answers must be so difficult and I wish you didn't need to go through this. I hope the testing (both you and fetal) will be able to shed some light on why this is happening. 

sagems10

2. Cd10, waiting to ovulate! Going to start opk's today! 

3. Rave: I finished my femara on Sunday, so I actually started to feel like a real person again! Idk if I'm just sensitive to the meds, but they make me pretty sick. But all better now and just waiting to ovulate! 

4. Dr. Pepper is life, y'all! It always picks me up. One thing I love about Utah is that we have soda shops all over the place so on hard days I stop and get my favorite! 

@justarius I agree, is sort hard to be around pregnant women. There's a girl at work who's due 5 days before I was, so it's really difficult to watch her progress. 

char245

@coco2787 did the RE give you any other tests/plans or just the blood work?
@sagems10 glad you are feeling better! 

coco2787

@char245 I'm glad you had a nice vacation.  FX for you this cycle!

@catlady2015 sorry about the rough AF   The first period after a loss is always rough, but I found it somewhat reassuring as a sign that my body was getting back to normal.

Enjoy your vacay @Mack2342!

ugh, I'm sorry about the pregnant co-workers.  That stuff is so hard, it's such a lonely feeling.

Ouch, sorry about your knee @MelissaMay82

@LElkCot I'm sorry you're feeling off, I hope the wait for your doctor's appointment goes by fast.

Those sound like good odds @40momma!

@bakerstreetboys I'm sorry you aren't feeling optimistic about IVF.  Are those the odds for your individual situation or for your clinic in general?

coco2787

@char245 just the blood testing for now, we didn't really discuss treatment options at the appointment.  I think we're just kind of stuck until we see what the testing says.  

justarius

Thanks ladies glad I’m not the only one who struggles with pregnant ladies around me
@sagems10 oh my gosh 5 days! That’s awful, at least the two at my work are a month & 2 months different from my due date so there’s a bit of difference that way! I’m so sorry  

@coco2787 I hope the testing gives you some kind of answers so you can move on! It’s hard feeling stuck in the unknown and worrying about all the different things it could be. 

@lin0442  good luck with the IUI! Hurray for increased %! 

@bakerstreetboys you got this lady! FX this is your month and you won’t have to worry about IVF. As far as stats go just think 25% chance of pregnancy is the same shot any couple on average has of pregnancy each month too. And if it does stick think more about the flip 60% chance of Not MC. You’re doing Everything you can! You’ve been through hell and back this won’t defeat you! 

@catlady2015 are you feeling any better? 

@mwmiller4 congrats on being off the bench! I’m curious you said 4th high on the monitor...what kinda monitor you mean? 

catlady2015

@justarius - yes! days 1 and 2 were just awful. today is cd4 and I'm basically down to spotting, so definitely better. I hear you about being around other pregnant women. I just can't do it. I'm so grateful that I work from home and nobody on my team is expecting. I sure give people the stink eye when I'm out shopping though. I can't imagine working with women who would have been due close to me and having to see them daily.  

char245

@coco2787 FX that your blood work comes back with some helpful information!!

bakerstreetboys

@coco2787 I hope you get some answers with your blood work.  Those odds are for my particular situation based on age and hormone levels.  We'll see!

@justarius Thank you   I know that women with lower odds than me have had successful IVF cycles, but I know I will live in fear the entire pregnancy if it works.  All we can do is hope for the best   I think we're all right there with you on finding it hard to be around pregnant ladies.  This was supposed to be my last week of work before going on maternity leave, and here I sit, non pregnant....  It's hard.

@catlady2015Happy to hear that you're feeling better!

@sagems10 Yay for feeling human again!

dpjennifer

2. Status? CD 34. Waiting for AF.

3. R/R: Sorry for late responses, having a real rough week. I couldn't bring myself to respond before now. I got offered a job that would be perfect for me in an amazing location, and it’s looking unlikely that I will be able to take it because of my current Agency. Urgh! The ‘fresh start’ I was hoping for to focus on my mental/emotional health is going up in smoke and I’m stuck in a position I hate. Grrrr.

4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better?  Cuddles/kisses from my furbabies. Sometimes my puppies are all that keep me going in this life. olivemomma Ooohh… wine… I like that answer!

char245 Ohhh, a week at the beach sounds amazing right now! Glad you had a good time.

Mack2342 Enjoy your vacation!!!

Kath525 Geesh, everyone is on vacation right now! I’m jealous. Glad you’re enjoying it!

coco2787 I’m sorry about the funeral home. It definitely isn’t something someone expects to deal with. I used to work for a cemetery and the shocked sad look you see on the faces of your ‘patrons’ is standard. I also hope they find a reason for your losses. Being in ‘unexplained RPL’ land is the pits.

justarius  Ugh, sorry about all the PG co-workers. I couldn’t even deal with it if that were me. I flee when I see PG people at my work.

bakerstreetboys Sorry about the stats. I agree with you. For the expense of what they often tout as the ‘only hope’ to many of us (even those of us undiagnosed) it really is not comforting at all.

bakerstreetboys

@dpjennifer I'm sorry that you're having a rough week.  Can you switch agencies?

dpjennifer

bakerstreetboys I'm currently trying to, but my agency has their teeth in me and there's a contract issue and it's a whole big deal. *sigh*  #Lawyer

maman_etincelle

1. Introduce yourself (if new): Hello, I'm new here, introduced myself earlier, but then could not figure my way back because I'm apparently getting old. I'm 33, my boyfriend is 32. I lost our daughter at 20+2 due to a weak cervix. She was perfect, but too young and the hospital could not do anything for her. I'm from Montreal, Canada and on my second cycle of Femara/letrozole because of pcos.
2. Status? CD 24 of a usually 40-ish day cycle. I think I am 5dpo, but it's the first time I used opk so I'm v. confused
3. R/R: My due date is coming soon, I really don't know how I'll make it. I've decided I wanted to be pregnant again by then, and we all know if you want something real hard, it HAS to happen.... (insert the biggest eyeroll). I also just POAS because I figured I would get it out of my system and wait 10 days. Let's see how that works out
4.GTKY: What are some small things that make your day so much better? Petting my cat and playing videogames keeps me sane(ish)

finger crossed for everyone!

dpjennifer

maman_etincelle Sorry for the loss of your daughter. Try not to stress about the due date too much, even though I know that's super hard to do. If it's any consolation, I had a really hard time leading up to my first due date, and was super anxious and upset when I found out I wouldn't be PG before the date... but then the date itself passed pretty smoothly. I think I worked myself up with too many hopes beforehand, and after all that stress, the date itself was not as bad.

maman_etincelle

Thanks Jennifer, I try not to stress too much, there is just so much happening in July, my expected due date, my going back to work, this silly idea I had that I HAD to be pregnant before then... I hope like you said that it won't be that bad when the dates will pass... I'm trying to see the positive side of thing (I used to be a very pessimistic person before my loss)

dpjennifer

@maman_etincelle Yeah, it's hard when there's a lot going on. I don't tend to be optimistic nor pessimistic... I'm just am a realist... doesn't always make me friends tho

maman_etincelle

@dpjennifer (ps. woohoo, managed to tag someone!) It's good to be realist! Truth is hard to hear sometime, but it's still the truth