Husband Unsupportive

debbiem86

So today my husband came in and asked me if I was sick I said just allergies. From there he started saying that why isn't our daughter going to the Doctor more and shouldn't I be breastfeeding. Um pur daughter never took to breastfeeding and the lactation consultant said its because I have flat nipples and needed a nipple shield. She never took and my breastmilk depleted. Then he goes on to criticize my parenting, which made me mad because he has not changed a diaper, got up once at night or changed a diaper. Some day he doesnt even hold her.He also said I picked her up harsh last night. I told him instead of criticizing how about you help. He went off saying I work my a** off and you stay at home most women do what you are doing with no help and they are fine. Then he told me I am negative and he doesnt know what is wrong with me and told me I bring him down. At the moment I feel very isolatedisolated, depressed and lonely so all I could do is cry he told me to stop and that some days he feels I am not doing a good job. Any advice?
 

lovesclimbing

debbiem86 said:

So today my husband came in and asked me if I was sick I said just allergies. From there he started saying that why isn't our daughter going to the Doctor more and shouldn't I be breastfeeding. Um pur daughter never took to breastfeeding and the lactation consultant said its because I have flat nipples and needed a nipple shield. She never took and my breastmilk depleted. Then he goes on to criticize my parenting, which made me mad because he has not changed a diaper, got up once at night or changed a diaper. Some day he doesnt even hold her.He also said I picked her up harsh last night. I told him instead of criticizing how about you help. He went off saying I work my a** off and you stay at home most women do what you are doing with no help and they are fine. Then he told me I am negative and he doesnt know what is wrong with me and told me I bring him down. At the moment I feel very isolatedisolated, depressed and lonely so all I could do is cry he told me to stop and that some days he feels I am not doing a good job. Any advice?
 

I think you should tell your husband how his words make you feel and have a good discussion with him. Everyone has days that they don't feel their best, and they say things they don't mean. That doesn't mean it's ok or right, but perhaps he was having a bad day and sitting down and discussing it can make him understand how you feel and the effect of his words so he can change the way he speaks. Depending on his response and if this is consistent behavior from him, that's an issue and I suggest counseling. 

I don't know how far postpartum you are, but regarding the depression, you may be experiencing some postpartum depression and should talk to your medical person about that. As far as feeling isolated and lonely, that can also be part of PPD. It could also just be needing to make friends, and you could try to find some mom groups to be part of.