July 2018 Moms

Re: TW Tuesday 5/22

  • DS is the TW today. He must be growing, because he’s been acting out and sleeping SO much- 3.5 hour nap yesterday and still went to bed on schedule. 
    He decided to coat the pantry floor and then play in a sea of bread flour while I was getting ready to bring him to play group- mind you he was already dressed and ready to go. I knew he was being too quiet... 
    Play group was a mess in itself but that’s par for the course these days. How are kids supposed to learn to share if parents keep shielding their kids from confrontation? 
  • @acunamatada that is my struggle too at playgroups! I have a really great outdoor playgroup where the parents are generally like, well, lets see if it comes to blows! and then most of the other ones the parent removes their child before they can respond with a big fat "NO!" Sometimes the parents even give my kid the toy and tell their kid to find something else! I'm like, no lets let them work it out and if one of our kids gets shoved we can step in. 

    No TW yet but...DS isn't napping so give me time! Oh, maybe this is one...DS has started just not caring about getting up and peeing in the morning or middle of the night, so we might have to go back to pull ups. I think I might be giving him water too soon before bed so I'll try cutting that off and see if it helps, but I'm doing laundry for his pee blankets like, every day. 
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  • Grow spurts can be crazy! Sorry for the toddler mess. I totally agree that it's important to teach kids the art of confrontation -lots of adults avoid it!

    Work is the TW, then DH a bit, I don't know. InreI re wanted to get some sleep but as I said we went to bed too late. DH struggled to get up as usual and we had to put away some boxes in the storage by the carport. I log in to work and of course email is down and I'm also locked out of all my apps. 
    Then my boss asks if I saw this client email, I'm like no, I just messaged the team saying email is down! As I try to figure out this issue DH is making breakfast and asking when I am coming to eat and I'm obviously busy figuring things out because my boss will just keep messaging in our app instead of calling and she isn't understanding what I'm trying to tell her.

    Bottom line, boxes were not stored, I had to take DH to work because he was late and had no time to use the scooter, I left without eating...so I ended up getting a dirty chai latte at Starbucks and taking a break before going back to madness.

    Of course client issue was fixed and so was the email server issue so now I have dozens of emails to address...can I just nap all day???
  • My TW is our contracting company for our renos... it has been a shit show since Day 1.  Every step of the way I've had to point out errors, make plans, ask for things to be fixed etc. etc.  Today the painter showed up to finish the last couple of hours of paint and touch ups... except that no one has come to fix the uneven trim we complained about Tuesday of last week....  This was all supposed to be done on the 15th, and add today to the list of yet another wasted day pushing the whole thing back again!!!!  I am 8 months pregnant and on bedrest... I shouldn't have to be project managing every day when we're paying a huge chunk of money to have professionals do it....  SO frustrating. 
  • I think I'm the TW today. I feel like a horrible employee. I literally have NO desire to work and my mind is in total nesting mode. We are still in progress of a launch and I should be testing at all times. however...I just...can't get my mind to do it...

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  • DD is mine today. I am having bad pelvic pain and this kid is refusing to stay in her room or go down for nap. So I am having to keep picking her up and bring her back to bed. The whole time cringing in pain while she laughs...
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  • @KatyF0813 We have the same TW! Sorry to hear about your woes; that really sucks. Do you know when they are fixing the trim? You're right, you shouldn't have to be dealing with this now. How many renos are you doing? Have you worked with them before?

    My TW contractors know that we wanted the upstairs bath done before June. We picked floor and shower tile at the beginning of the month. The floor tile was in stock, but the shower tile was delayed 2 weeks. Fine; I can deal with that. It was supposed to be installed this week. DH waited for them to come this morning and they never showed up, and then I get a call saying that it's still delayed because of the holiday. But it's not a holiday now! It's a holiday next week! WTF kind of tile did we order that it's now delayed almost a month?! Why weren't we told about this before? Maybe we could have picked a different tile. So now nothing can be done until we get all of the tile installed next week. UGHH. After that, though, it should move along fairly quickly, and then it better be all done by the first half of June.
  • millpemillpe member
    @zombiehoohaa +1 to being a horrible employee. 

    I have so many TW today... so that may mean I'm being a TW.

    First goes to Hilton. I have a hotel booked for a weekend in June. I used my HHonors and pre-paid to get the best price.. well now it dropped $20/night and they wont give me the difference. They even have best proce guarantee but apparently that doesn't apply to their own prices? Was planning to stay at a Hilton next week, but now I'm boycotting and finding a new hotel and also switching my preferred chain for work trips. 

    Second goes to a coworker. We were assigned something to be completed by the end of April. I did my part, he never did his. I complained to my supervisor a couple weeks ago because it ended making my job harder. Well I got an email that it was done last week, looked today and only half done. When I asked about it he is now refusing to do it and said he got permission to not do it from a different director- so why did I have to? I decided to drop it and when I do next months reporting i will only report my numbers and see what happens. I'm not in charge of him so its not like I can make him do something. 

    Third goes to DH. He has been saying he will clean out our basement for a year so we can start work to finish it. Its 95% his stuff and my stuff was in boxes in the designated storage area (so not in the way). I can't even go down there because it stresses me out so much. Well his mom offered to come help him and how his WHOLE family is coming over to help him organize his basement. The thought stresses me out even more. I know they are trying to be helpful, but now I'm going to have to direct them all what to do... I told DH I was going to work on the nursery and not let any of them help me upstairs so I don't have to deal with giving directions. And I might just close the door and watch Netflix on my computer because the thought of having to work after 9 hours of work is exhausting. Why don't I just get to relax when it's his basement mess to deal with? 
    Me: 31 DH: 34 :heart: Married: April 2016
    TTC December 2016
    BFP 2/28/17 // CP 3/1/17
    MFI Diagnosis: Aug 2017
    BFP 11/1/17 // DS born 6/18
    TTC January 2019
    BFP 3/21/19 // D&C (MMC) 5/8/19
  • @supersara2 - we are having out bonus room converted into a bedroom and open office.... pretty simple reno... swap out one big window for three smaller ones (using the existing opening), put up a wall and build a closet.  But there have been issues every step of the way.  We've never used a contractor before, we usually just do renos ourselves (my father in law is a homebuilder), but we figured since I was pregnant we'd just pay a company so that we didn't have to deal with the hassle of it all....  turns out we should have just done it ourselves. It would have saved us and ton of money and energy and probably would have been quicker too.  Today the painted showed up because he'd been given the go ahead from the project manager to finish painting... but no one had come to fix the trim around the windows we complained about the middle of last week (two side by side windows... like 10" between them and the trim isn't level!  Like to the point that you notice it as soon as you walk in the room).  The owner is coming out today and its just me and I know I'm going to cry telling him how unhappy we are with everything because I always cry when I'm mad and I'm frustrated with myself just thinking about it.

    Maybe your tiles are coming from Canada?  We had a national holiday yesterday....  I'm sorry they aren't communicating with you, that's for sure the most frustrating part of the whole process.
  • supersara2supersara2 member
    edited May 2018
    @KatyF0813 Oh man! It's always such a gamble working with contractors. Delays are always so frustrating! I hope the owner fixes the trim today, or at least gives you a much better solution.

    I didn't even think of where they could be coming from. Here I am, just thinking of America's upcoming holiday. But yes, if they just could have told me that when we ordered, I would have understood. I would have been annoyed, because most things annoy me these days, but I would have been a little more understanding.

    Thank goodness this is the last reno for a long time.
  • all these reno disasters are giving me agite - we just got the initial quote from the GC to do the kitchen and it was way higher than expected but does include some supply costs I was accounting for separately...

    Today is just a TW... everything's going wrong and i don't have the energy or f's to try to redirect it to go right
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  • @gingerbride26 I know what you mean. Renos are a huge pain to deal with during the process, but it's so worth it in the end! When it's all over, you have a beautiful kitchen to use.

    It's just a matter of finding someone you trust, which is hard. This is our fourth one with the same contractors and we've never had an issue like this before (I'm really blaming the design house our contractor just started working with for dropping the ball on our current issues). Are you going with that GC or are you looking at different bids? Maybe you can try negotiating?

  • wildtotwildtot member
    +1 bad employee today. I didn’t even answer calls from my regional director because i didn’t feel like it. I eventually just chatted him. 
  • @supersara2 not sure yet, we looked it over when we got it last night...we hadn't really found other people in the area to get more quotes from; DH is going to contact his electrician cousin to see if he could do some of it for less and we'll move some stuff to future phases (like overhead lighting).  We really liked this GC during the interview, he talked about spending money intelligently and not doing one of our ideas because it wasn't going to make a big difference but cost a lot.  It just sucks because if I wasn't pregnant I feel like we could have done this ourselves, but I'm not up to hours of tiling and DH doesn't feel like he would do a good job hanging cabinets himself.
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  • Bad employee here too. I usually work 7-4, but today I had a doctor appointment at 8, followed by a midwife appointment, and didn’t get home and logged into work until almost 10. Then I worked until about 11:30, when I got ready for my doula to come over. Met with her until 1:30, then had lunch, and finally got back to work around 2. Then I worked until 4;30 and called it quits. It’s sucks because i’m Feeling anxious about getting things done at work, but apparently not anxious enough to actually motivate me to do it, so I just end up continuing to feel anxious. I just want to be on leave so badly. 
  • +1 to reno disasters. Who's idea was it to do reno's during the last trimester of pregnancy? We're having our master bathroom done. I can't totally complain at the contractor since it's our family business doing it, but there have been issues every step of the way. It's just the way these things go mostly: two steps forward, one step back. Especially when you have multiple sub-contractors all working on the same project. As long as it's done before baby gets here.

    Also, I feel like this baby is going to just break out of my stomach sometimes..like the scene in Alien.

    Image result for alien breaking out of stomach

    TTC History:
    Me: 36 H: 40 Married 2015. Together since 2010.
    TTC: Sept 2016-Oct 2017
    BFP Oct 2017. DD born July 2018.
    TTC: March 2020. BFP March 2020
    Due date was Nov 2020
    DS born Sept 2020. DS passed away Nov 2020 due to prematurity and birth trauma.
    TTC: March 2021
    IUI #1 Nov 2021, BFN
    IUI #2 Dec 2021 BFP.  MC Jan 2022
    IUI #3 Aug 2022 BFN
    IUI #4 Sept 2022 BFN
    AMH test came back at .081. Was going to move on to IVF with DE, but have decided not to. Will be leaving it up to the universe now.



  • nimmlenimmle member
    It took all day, but I finally found my TW. Just got out of an uber with a driver who didn’t understand how the pool routes work. He insisted on dropping everyone right off at their door rather than drop off where the app tells him to. Luckily he was going to pass right by my destination in his efforts to go around to drop the first passenger off. I had him stop and let me out. Thank goodness I was paying attention or I would have never caught my bus home. 
  • Super weak TW but today DHwas brishing his teeth and he had the toothpaste all the way on the other side of his sink so i couldnt reach ot to brush mine. I said, "hey put the toothpaste down in the middle next time so I don't have to go around you to grab it." He says, "maybe if all this shit wasn't here there'd be room." I look down it's a box of contact solution, to which I say, "why don't you pit this away if it bugs you?" "I didn't put it there!" HE SAYS. if I didn't pick up all the stuff I didn't place in our house it would be a shit show. Wtf?!? Pick up stuff that annoys you. I got things to do buddy.
  • @SmashJam omg my DH does the same thing. He’ll be pissy about like a wrapper on the floor (for example) and he’ll walk around it for 4 days and get madder and madder that I haven’t picked it up yet. Obviously it’s not bothering me as much as it is him so just pick the dang thing up so you don’t have to stew and be angry! 
  • wildtotwildtot member
    Who-T-H mows their lawn at 8pm on a weekday???!!! I got a toddler trying to go to sleep! They should have restrictions for this! 
  • @wildtot that's crazy. It can't be that light out? You still might run over random things!
  • @wildtot we usually do... if my H was around any other time of the day then he’d, for sure, rather do it then. Unfortunately he’s not so it’s usually as it’s getting dark lol. Luckily for the neighbors (or unluckily?) were the only one on the block with kids. And we live in the country so it’s kinda like tough luck if you don’t like the sounds around here. 
  • wildtotwildtot member
    @SmashJam yup still light out unfortunately. We had to give in to blackout curtains for that reason because DSs window faces west. 
    @hillbillywife i get there are some instances when that is necessary but I’ve seen these neighbors home other times of the day and our homes are very very close to each other. They even leave their backyard floodlights all day long. It’s so frustrating at night! I think they are trying to sell the house and i hope it happens soon.
  • @wildtot it’s always nice to get rid of irritating neighbors. FX for you for that!
  • @hillbillywife so true about living rural and dealing with the noises. We are on a somewhat populated stretch of our road but are pretty rural...however it does drive me NUTS that our neighbors across the street and one house down think life is not worth living unless their cars are lacking an exhaust and that they are always working on them outside and revving the engines. I know they can't help it and you obviously have to work on your cars but with my windows closed I can hear them! Hopefully this baby sleeps like a trooper right through it all!
  • @wildtot check your town ordinances in case it happens again...my town has an ordinance against that. I think it's something like any lawn work or construction can only take place between 7am and 7pm, something along those lines. I find it really rude and inconsiderate when someone chooses to mow their lawn or do other loud things at night when they live in a neighborhood with houses fairly close together and a ton of kids. My kid goes to bed at 7, and I do NOT take kindly to people doing stuff like that. 
  • wildtotwildtot member
    @zande2016 good point! Maybe our new HOA might have something too. 
  • millpemillpe member
    Does it make me a crazy person that all the talk about home renos makes me want to start on my basement?

    @wildtot I'm obviously a FTM when I didn't see the issue with mowing a lawn at 8pm... I also live rural so maybe that makes a difference? Even my next door neighbor mowing the lawn is probably quieter than the normal street noise I had growing up. 
    Me: 31 DH: 34 :heart: Married: April 2016
    TTC December 2016
    BFP 2/28/17 // CP 3/1/17
    MFI Diagnosis: Aug 2017
    BFP 11/1/17 // DS born 6/18
    TTC January 2019
    BFP 3/21/19 // D&C (MMC) 5/8/19
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