PGAL Check In ~ 5/9-5/16

tosh24

@BitterBett12 Yay! So great that your projesterone went up! I know you're worried about your hcg but it still seems like it's totally in range. Doubling time once hcg is over 1200 is anywhere from 72-96 hours. At 60 hours,  you're ahead of the curve. Is your doctor having you do any more betas?

zamoraspin

@BitterBetty12 I don't think those numbers are meh - after you hit 1,200 it's normal for doubling to slow down to every three days. My clinic told me progesterone varies throughout the day. Plus you had a u/s that was on track. I know you probably want to manage your expectations but honestly every sign is looking good. 

sparkymcgeee

Ditto the other ladies, BitterBetty. I'm freaking out over here with numbers much lower than yours and wishing I had your numbers. This is good news. 

galactickates

@BitterBetty12 Were you tracking your ovulation? 

I'm 5+6 today and my Tuesday beta was 2,304. We're pretty much at the same point.  I ovulated around 17th and took 9 days to implant according to my temps, which is why my numbers look lower then other people who are also 5+6. 

My Dr seemed just fine with my numbers.  They're doubling the way they should. 
 Is your Dr concerned?

galactickates

I know.... @sparkymcgeee I get anxiety everytime someone complains about low numbers and they're higher then mine.  Especially with being pgal. 

BitterBetty12

Thank you everyone for the reassurance! You are absolutely right that I am just trying to manage expectations. With two previous losses and one that started with low progesterone and slow doubling betas, it's so hard not to jump to the worst conclusion.

So I was not tracking ovulation, but at most I can be off by a day in that direction (meaning I was 5+3 at the first draw and 5+5 for the second) unless my DH has magic swimmers that can last 5+ days. Plus my BFP is at what I estimate to be 10dpo, and while 9 dpo is also reasonable, 8dpo is a stretch!

There is one thing I am trying to hold onto - with DD I had a horrible set of betas in week 5. At 5 weeks I was around 3500, and then at 5 + 2 I was only up to 4082. So it IS possible that my body just does weird things with HCG? Her progesterone was always great though but I was on crinone with her from 10dpo.

I haven't spoken to my OB yet. She isn't typically in the office today but the nurse forwarded my results to her so I am expecting a phone call from her probably later today.

No betas scheduled but I have an ultrasound Tuesday afternoon. She might draw more then but at that point an ultrasound is more indicative anyway.

dragonette505

BitterBetty12 its probably good no more betas till US.... after 12-15 hundred its better to measure with US. SO glad your progesterone is up! Keeping everything crossed for this little one!!

I think for us PGAL, its pretty impossible to not have doubts at this stage... im tortured by my lack of strong symptoms. But the only way we can know we are out is if our doctors say we are and its clear. until then we can be hopeful for each other (especially when we cant be hopeful for ourselves).
Sending big hugs to everyone on here

galactickates

@BitterBetty12 since you weren't tracking it's totally possible that that you ovulated when you think you did but it took more days to implant.  I've read it can take 7-10 days, which would account for a few days, plus it can then take a couple days to get a +hpt.  All I'm saying is that our bodies aren't robots.  There are lots of explanations as to why your numbers are the way they are.  

sparkymcgeee

Just had another draw. Now the wait begins. 

I was poked three times. They kept failing. They felt so so bad. 

BitterBetty12

@sparkymcgeee All the FX for great numbers! Will you get your results back today?

tosh24

@sparkymcgeee GL!!! Hope you have great results to share soon!!!!

AFM, I had a 4th beta today. Doctor didn't require it but because of my PGAL brain she gave me a requisition form that I can use as many times as I want to get betas done to help my anxiety. I thought I was doing well after my last draw on Monday (3254 @ 5+0) but then yesterday I started to spiral and made an appointment to have another draw today. I know doubling time will have slowed down at this point, but I just need to know the numbers are going in the right direction (hopefully). Won't get results until tomorrow morning. 

sparkymcgeee

167 today. 
Monday was 15dp conception. That draw was 25. Wednesday was 17dpc and 57. Today was 19dpc and 167. So they are doing what they need to do but aren't very high yet. I hope I just have a slow starter. I'm focusing on the fact that they are going up like the need to. 

zamoraspin

@tosh24 Can relate. I went to an independent lab yesterday to get mine checked one more time before my u/s next Wednesday. Because for some reason asking for four betas at the RE's office is ok but five makes me high maintenance... FX for another good number! Mine has slowed way way down but did go up some more. 

zamoraspin

@sparkymcgeee I think those are great increases! More than doubling every 48 hours!

sparkymcgeee

zamora_spin said:

@sparkymcgeee I think those are great increases! More than doubling every 48 hours!

That's what I'm trying to focus on. Not the low number. I'm still kind of in my head about it but trying to be positive.

zamoraspin

@sparkymcgeee When you say dp conception is that because you weren't tracking ovulation and are going by when you BD'd? You probably know this but sperm can live for quite a while in your tubes - you can get pregnant from BD up to 5 days prior to ovulation. So, you might be not as far along as you are thinking either.

BitterBetty12

Just got the call from my OB. She is concerned with the fact that my HCG didn’t double in between draws. She told me just to hang tight and keep doing what I’m soing and we’ll just see what happens Tuesday! I kind of needed that to bring me back down to having reasonable expectations. 

sparkymcgeee

zamora_spin said:

@sparkymcgeee When you say dp conception is that because you weren't tracking ovulation and are going by when you BD'd? You probably know this but sperm can live for quite a while in your tubes - you can get pregnant from BD up to 5 days prior to ovulation. So, you might be not as far along as you are thinking either.

I was kind of tracking with FF. I wasn't temping so I didn't have a precise window (they give you more days) but there was illness and traveling going on so we only had sex once and it was after the window was "closed" even though there was some CM that day. So I would have had to ovulate later than normal. I am hoping it was taking longer than usual to implant and so that's why my numbers are lower. 

BitterBetty12

@sparkymcgeee I know someone who had a successful pregnancy with their rainbow with numbers that started similarly low. I have everything crossed for you!! The doubling is great. 

tosh24

My 4th beta came back at 9715 yesterday @ 5+4 (up from 3254 on Monday @ 5+0), so hopefully that should allow me to relax over the weekend. I have another beta scheduled for Tuesday but I don't know if I'll do it given the good increases so far. We'll see how bad my PGAL brain is on Tuesday morning. U/S is Friday.

zamoraspin

@todh24 That’s great! I think you just have to see how you feel next week, whether another beta will help or make you more anxious. I know for me it’s so hard to believe we will have a good u/s even though the numbers have looked good.

BitterBetty12

@tosh24 That’s a great rise!! I think playing it by ear makes the most sense. Your numbers looks amazing though. 

BitterBetty12

I’m on the PGAL struggle bus today. But kind of in a good way. I actually feel like this pregnancy has a decent shot despite my OBs concerns and my generally low levels. I don’t want to get too confident but I also don’t want to give up hope. 

I don’t really have many symptoms to speak of. I feel like by this point with DD (6+1) I was already into my nausea and food aversions. But I also know every pregnancy is different. 

zamoraspin

@BitterBetty12 I am 6+2, my #s have been crazy high, and I don’t have nausea or food aversions. Hardly have any symptoms still. Go with your gut, every pregnancy is different. 

dubcompanion

I'm late to the party on my own check-in. This is a mighty great first impression! I’ve got 9.5 more days of school left (teacher here) so in a couple weeks I’ll be more active. Right now I’m on survival mode. 

@BitterBetty12 Keeping you in my thoughts these next few days as you await to see how everything is. I hope you enjoy your weekend!

I’ll respond to more of you when I’m on desktop. My mobile app glitches and prevents me from scrolling up to see other posts while I’m writing my own. It’s frustrating, to say the least, especially when I have limited Bump time as it is.

1. How many weeks are you, and how big is baby? 6+3, the size of a battleship peg

2. How are you feeling? Mentally and physically? Mentally I've been okay. I haven't had much time to focus on PGAL brain yet. Give me 9.5 more days. Physically, I've had my typical mild 1st tri symptoms: lots of peeing, some fatigue, irritability, and some queasiness. 

3. Rants/Raves/Questions? I've been putting off making the first OB appointment. I've typically scheduled it shortly after discovering I'm pregnant. Why am I procrastinating?? I want to know the baby is alive and well, I really do. But something about making that call is holding me back. 

4. Next appointment or milestone you are looking forward to? I have a long wait, because the milestone I most look forward to is entering the second trimester. By then, I hope to have had 2 great u/s (1 being the NT scan). Can't say I'm actually looking forward to those though. I just want to get past the early humps. 

5. GTKY: What's helping most with your PGAL anxiety? Work and caring for DD. Work makes the day fly, and DD helps keep me focused on the present. I didn't have that the first two pregnancies, so I'm thankful. I have 7.5 weeks left of my most anxious period, which ends midway through summer. It's a weird feeling to simultaneously wish away and want to savor it all. 

BitterBetty12

@dubcompanion I’ve had a lot of testing going on in School the last couple of weeks so it’s given me too much free time! I still have about 30 School days left though. Your symptoms sound close to what mine are right now! Especially the peeing part. I’m sorry making that first appointment is a struggle. I’m glad I did go early so I could start my crinone and find out about the SCH but at the same time if things work out I know a lot of my concern will have been unnecessary. So part of me does wish I waited for that reason. 

zamoraspin

Mother’s Day is a hard day for me. I found out I was pregnant for the first time on Mother’s Day 2017. I got to tell DH in a cute way that I was pregnant. I was due January 24, 2018. That pregnancy ended, and then another, and another. And now I’m so grateful to be pregnant again on Mother’s Day, or any day. But I also expected by now I’d have a baby in my arms.

People ask me if I have kids and I say “no” or “not yet”. The truth is too painful and personal - that I’ll never meet my three babies in this life. This day celebrating mothers is a painful reminder that when people look at me they don’t see a mother.

But I am a mother. 

Happy Mother’s Day to you, my PGAL ladies, you are a mom, even if you never got to hold your baby. 

This video was very touching and made me cry. 

https://www.today.com/video/to-the-mothers-with-an-aching-heart-on-mother-s-day-940752963958

galactickates

@zamora_spin - I'm sobbing right now,  that was so touching.  Thank you for sharing.  

Kabazaba

@zamora_spin thank you for sharing! It was hard in church this morning as everyone was giving thanks for their moms and I was just thinking about all of us for whom “motherhood” means loss. Thinking about all you ladies today and looking forward to getting breakfast in bed next year made by DH with a 4-month-old on his hip. 

lamega

1. How many weeks are you, and how big is baby? 6 weeks today...baby is the size of a sweet pea!

 2. How are you feeling? Mentally and physically? Last week my anxiety was super high and my nausea was mild. Now it’s flipped. High nausea, mild anxiety.

 3. Rants/Raves/Questions? Freaking hemorrhoids (thanks, son.) With the constipation (thanks, this baby) they flared up and sometimes bleed. Terrifying. In a panic I have to double, triple and quadruple check that it’s coming from my butt and not my hoo-ha.

 4. Next appointment or milestone you are looking forward to? My first appointment is May 30. Feels like a long time to wait. My midwives don’t usually do an ultrasound that early but if they can’t hear the heartbeat I’m going to beg for one.

 5. GTKY: What's helping most with your PGAL anxiety? Talking about it. I know some like to keep their pregnancy quiet, especially after a loss, but I need to talk about it and get prayers and encouragement from people I love so I’m not swimming in anxiety inside my own head.

jess5263

1. How many weeks are you, and how big is baby?

4+4 today, poppyseed

2. How are you feeling? Mentally and physically? 

Physically, pretty good. Sore boobs and intermittent gagging. Mentally, depends on the day. Trying to keep expectations realistic. Last time, we got so excited that we finally got pregnant and DH ended up telling so many people. So that was hard when we had go back and tell everyone about the loss. 

3. Rants/Raves/Questions? 
None really at this time. This was a club I was hoping not to ever join! Glad to have the support though!

4. Next appointment or milestone you are looking forward to? 

Just want to get to an US with a heartbeat right now. No US scheduled yet. 3rd beta Thursday. Hoping they don't want to do an US until there should be a HB. 

5. GTKY: What's helping most with your PGAL anxiety?

Not really sure yet. 

tosh24

Good luck on your beta today @KariAnn323 and your follow-up u/s @BitterBetty12. Thinking of you ladies!

BitterBetty12

Thank you! These next four hours are going to drag!!

KariAnn323

Thank you guys! HCG was 4,115! They want me in for a u/s tomorrow. I hate to push it out but they only do OB u/s in the afternoons and I’m at a wake tomorrow afternoon to evening. I left a message with the nurse asking if Thursday would be okay 

Kabazaba

Yesterday had very bad MS and sore boobs. Today woke up and nothing. I am freaking out it’s another MC. You guys think if I call my doc they will check for me today? I am starting to feel nauseas now but can’t tell if it’s just anxiety or actual MS since it’s been well over an hour since I woke up. Terrified of going to work and having another MC there but am also worried my doc will just think I’m a crazy person. 

CoastieGirl79

@Kabazaba my symptoms have been on and off. For example, I had nausea during week four, then it stopped. I'm at week six and it's back. But, on other hand and empathizing with being PGAL, call in if it will give you peace of mind. 

zamoraspin

@Kabazaba I agree with coastiegirl that early pregnancy symptoms come and go. If it will give you peace of mind to call your dr then do so. Are you scheduled for a first u/s? 

dragonette505

@Kabazaba it can go back and forth... my boobs definitely differ from day to day. My personal thoughts are, unless you are having severe cramping or bleeding, rushing in may just add to your anxiety. You are NOT a crazy person, and most of my mc's started at work and it really sux. My two cents would be to either wait a day and see if its a trend (so less symptoms tomorrow) or email the nurse and ask what she/he thinks.

Kabazaba

Thanks ladies! Called DH and he talked me off the ledge. At work now, feeling nauseas, and like I just had a lucky MS-free morning I should have enjoyed more.

BitterBetty12

@Kabazaba I am glad your nausea is back (always so weird to say). Symptoms are realllllly not nice and like to play the disappear and come back game throughout all of first tri. With DD I would feel everything one day, nothing the next, and then some combo the day after that. It's really not fair on the PGAL brain. Like @CoastieGirl79 I had early nausea that tapered off and now is slowly starting to come back. I also didn't have breast soreness until 5+ weeks and even then it's touch and go!

Also I'm thinking of all of our ladies with appointments today through friday! Big hugs. Can't wait to hear updates!