OMG @rcultrona , the same thing happened to my DH. His best friend is getting married one week before our DD, but at the beach (3 hours by car from where we live). We told her "maybe we won´t be able to attend your wedding", she was like "whaaaat" and then we broke the news and she got really happy
We won't be doing anything special. Last time around we said something cheeky at my husband's grandmother's in front of everyone.
This time the grandparents all know. and TW both of my SIL just had miscarriages, (one in Feb, and one this week) so I am not going to be sharing too loudly or in their face.
Since we are living across an ocean from my parents, we're going to send them a package that says not to open until we're all on Facetime together. It'll have a onesie (called a "body" in Germany) and the first ultrasound picture. Not nearly as special as it would be if we were all together in person, but such is life!
I am having trouble with figuring out how to tell my sister though... She has been struggling with getting pregnant for around a year, and I want to be as sensitive as possible in sharing the news. Anyone have experience with this? Any advice??
My DH is an ER Doctor and I tried to order a onesie off of Etsy to tell him but wound up canceling my order out of fustration, So; I went in to his ER and had one of my friends who's a nurse do a full panel and send my DH in to tell me the results. He was reading over it and as soon as he hit the HCG portion and he came flying into the curtained area asking how long I'd known/IF I knew in general.Needless to say, Daddy is excited. And everyone thought that my way of announcing it was kind of hilarious. Especially because he tried to put on a serious expression/tone to ask if I knew that I was pregnant.
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I’m not planning on doing anything special except for my mom. We’re flying home at the end of May to visit so it’ll be perfect timing at 2nd trimester. I get a lot of blood work done because of a disease I have and my mom is a nurse so I always send to her so she can tell me what it means. I plan to bring my most recent series of tests from my OB with me to show her and have her connect the dots, since they’re all pregnancy-related tests.
@deutschmama depending on how you think your sister would prefer to hear the news, I think texting or calling her to tell her briefly something like “I’m pregnant. I know you’ve been trying for a baby for so long that I want to tell you before it’s announced publically and you here from someone else”. Sometimes a text is preferred, because then the person can react however they want without having to keep composed, and she doesn’t have to figure out what to say back to you immediately if she’s at a loss for words. It depends if your sister would be offended to not hear by FaceTime/a call (since in person won’t work for you). Also, if you think your parents might tell your sister about it, it may be best to tell your sister just a bit before you tell them. To let her know you’re telling your parents and that you want to make sure she hears it from you.
@deutschmama - i totally agree with what @tumbleweed-1 said above. I think a text is the best approach on this. It seems impersonal, but if your sister is struggling, she will probably appreciate the privacy of being able to come to term with the news and not have to force herself into excitement right away (although i'm sure she'll be thrilled for you once she is able to work through her own feelings).
I also agree with @tumbleweed-1 text would probably be the best option. Are you close to her SO? Would you be comfortable telling him and letting him tell her when the moment is right?
@tumbleweed-1, @morgantu- thank you so much for your replies. I was scared that texting the news would be too impersonal, but I think you are right- it is probably the most considerate. If the roles were reversed I would appreciate being able to process on my own. Thanks girls!
@katy0990, I didn't even think of that! I wish I was closer to her SO because that would be a good idea. He would know just how to break the news.
I love some of these ideas! I am due on Christmas Eve, so I had been thinking of doing some sort of Christmas themed announcement, but my first appointment is in May 15th, which is my son's first birthday. *TW(The one who we lost in August at 3 months old)*
So I think my announcement will basically just be an ultrasound pic with the caption "what better way to celebrate Micah's birthday than to see his baby brother or sister for the first time!" or something like that. Our close family and friends already know, so this will be our mass FB announcement.
So I have my first ultrasound tomorrow. I really want to tell my mom, like yesterday. DH wants to do a cutesy announcement for all of our family, but not for a couple more weeks. I can’t wait that long! I want to tell my Mom after I know everything is okay tomorrow, so now I’m not really sure what to do :sigh:
Me: 32 DH: 33 Type 1 Diabetic DS: Born 2/18/17 TTC #2: Jan. 2018 BFP: 3/27/18 EDD: 12/6/18
I'm sure your husband will understand if you really want to tell your mom. You could ask her to keep a secret for a couple of weeks. Also, you can still do a "cute" announcement for her. I feel like telling your mom is something special and if you really wanted to, he would understand.
On the other hand, a couple of weeks will go by fast, and it will be just as special no matter when you tell her
@rcultrona@misfithero I told my SIL before anyone else because she is an ob-gyn. This was not a planned pregnancy so I sent her a photo of the test and asked if she thought it was positive. I told my husband the next day. I had assumed my SIL had told my brother, so I texted him saying that I assumed he knew and he didn't. I was so impressed she had kept it secret. So I told him over text.
My parents were down the next weekend and we told them in person. I had borrowed my mom's hat, which I lost on vacation, so I said something like "There is some good news and some bad news..." then told them about the lost hat and then immediately that I was pregnant. I always lose stuff so I was hoping to distract them. Worked like a charm!
We told my in-laws on the phone the next weekend. I've told a few close friends via text. That's it so far! I don't think we'll make a social media announcement, but we'll start telling more friends and family slowly after the first ultrasound.
I didn’t feel like pretending this weekend so we told my parents, my dad always makes scavenger hunts for the girls so we made one up for them to help the girls with and the last clue led to a bun in the oven with a note that the girls will be big sisters! Then we just told a few other close relatives. We’ll wait until after my doc appointment to tell anyone else. Not sure how yet though. And no FB announcement for us either.
We're not FB announcers, so that's nice. (It's part privacy, but mostly because I don't know who's struggling with IF, and before we got any BFPs those public announcements felt like a punch to the gut.)
Otherwise, I think I know how I want to tell the family. We'll do it either late June or early July. We'll FaceTime each couple (both of our parents remarried, so it'll be four separate calls) to show them the new house we'll have then. Boxes or not, we'll show them around "this is the master bedroom, look at these windows! Down here is the guest room for you, and this will be the nursery. The office has ...blah blah blah" we'll just shoehorn in an obvious hint. Maybe we'll have furniture up including a crib? Options.
Either way, DH gets to make an excuse for us not going to San Diego for the holidays. He got everybody all worked up about it...but he forgot that I'm due on 12/12. So far the biggest downside of being secretly pg is when DH forgets and makes plans. I could have texted him a reminder, but I didn't want anybody to peek over his shoulder.
NTNP since Dec 2012 | TTC since Jan 2016 Dx: Unspecified IF BFP#1 Nov 2017 • Blighted Ovum + MMC • D&C at nine weeks BFP#2 Apr 2018 • It's a boy! • Born 13 Dec 2018
This has been the most difficult secret for me to keep. My sister knows (she's a nurse so she's my Google) and two of my friends know. H and I plan to tell my parents on mother's day weekend which is my birthday weekend. I feel it would be special for my mom since I had planned to tell her on her birthday before the first miscarriage. I cannot wait to let her know because then I can bother her instead of my sister. As for my in laws, we plan on telling them on our one year anniversary. We're planning a trip to Hawaii and that would be the first time I would have seen them since our wedding (they live in another country). I'm praying I can keep quite as that reveal will not be until August... I bought a bathing suit that says baby watch and that's what I'll use as our social media reveal. H wants to keep the pregnancy a secret until I cannot hide the belly anymore. I honestly think I have a month tops to say "oh Im just getting fat from being happily married"
DD1: Sorta blurted it out after 12w. Didn't tell anyone before then. DD2: Was 12w at DD1's bday party so had DD1 wear a t-shirt that said "big sister". It took a while for everyone to get it. Hadn't told anyone before then. This pregnancy: Already told my mom, his mom and my sisters on sort of a need-to-know basis. I've had some wonky beta results and figure I need these people for support if things go south. As far as announcing it to the masses ... well I'll be (hopefully) 12w the week before SO's brother's wedding so we're trying to sort that out as I am worried about stealing thunder from the marrying couple. I figure I hope I still have this problem after this Thursday's viability scan.
It's a personal thing. People wait until the second trimester because the chances of something going wrong are a lot smaller. It's completely up to you. Just think if you want all those people to know if something does go wrong (not that it would!)
I have a lot of announcement ideas, so it'll be interesting when MH and I decide to announce if we actually follow through with any of them. I'm hoping to give my MIL something that says "Only the best mothers get promoted to grandmothers" as this will be the first grand baby for that side. For my parents, there's a little box I found on etsy where a tiny bun is inside and a scroll that I'd have saying that we have a bun in the oven. I've thought about sending some of my long distance friends a little "dragon egg" from the same etsy shoppe and having the scroll say "Winter is Coming, so is our baby". As far as online announcements, I've seen an image of couples holding up little shoes behind a Christmas-y backdrop saying "Santa isn't the only thing coming this Christmas", but maybe adding a different spin like "Expecting a new angel this Christmas".
Hubby & Me: Born 1993 Married: August 2013 Son: December 2018 Baby in heaven: February 2020, was due Sept
@sterjacks21 like ab_canada said, it's totally personal preference. We announced all 3 of ours immediately. I told DH, we told family, and then announced to the world. I'm sure people thought we were crazy, but I'm the type of person who wants to share my joy right away, and am ok sharing the bad stuff, too. We got pregnant with our 4th right around Thanksgiving, and announced right away again, but that one was my first time I had to "unannounce" it. I felt a little silly, but to me it wasn't a big deal for people to know. I honestly think that loss was because of the stress my body was under since losing our 3 month old just 3 months prior. Since then I have been able to emotionally heal a bit more, and i firmly believe that made a difference in my physical body. This time we are waiting to mass announce until the day of our first appointment, but it will still be "early" at just over 8w.
I've thought about sending some of my long distance friends a little "dragon egg" from the same etsy shoppe and having the scroll say "Winter is Coming, so is our baby".
Oh my gosh, I love this! I'm a huge GoT nerd and now I want to do this, haha.
@kelsyyh@maureenmce & @texas_t ooo, me too. Ya’ll beat me too it, but I definitely want to run that by SO. We’ve already told our parents, my siblings, and my two closest friends, but there are lots of other people to announce to.
I just realized this is a physical item. SO pointed out that everyone we know well enough to buy something like that for either already knows, or doesn’t know what GoT is.
I wish I knew computer stuff enough to make something digital for facebook. An image of an egg and then when you hover/click on it it has the wording. Maybe that exists somewhere? Like an e-card.
@tumbleweed-1 I really like the idea of making it an e-card! That way you can include more people (the egg is over $10 each - so if you were sending it to more than one person it'd get a little crazy). I actually might see if I can figure that out sometime soon.
Hubby & Me: Born 1993 Married: August 2013 Son: December 2018 Baby in heaven: February 2020, was due Sept
@antsangel1118 on no! I’m so sorry about both of your losses. I just had my first ultrasound on Tuesday and I’m 9weeks and 5 days. We’re going to announce to the world tomorrow night after we fell my FIL and sister in law in person, since they don’t know yet. Looking back at I think we announced for my son at 8 weeks, after we saw a heartbeat.
I write a blog so I usually do an annoucement on there and I also put together a book with photos and week by week updates for each kid that I have printed after I have them, so we will do a photo announcement. We will tell our parents just whenever though. With my son we did a picture of all three of us swinging and it said "new swing needed February 2016" so we will do another family picture but I'm feeling pretty clueless on what I want to do.
Married: June 25, 2011 Our beautiful girl came into our lives October 15, 2012 TFAS: March 2014 BFP #2 July 2014 Miscarriage (6 weeks) August 2014 BFP #3 September 2014 Chemical Pregnancy September 2014 Seeing the RE: February 2015 Diagnosis PCOS: February 2015
BFP #4 April 2015 Chemical Pregnancy April 2015
BFP #5 June 2015 EDD: 3/5/16 Our rainbow baby came into our lives February 27, 2016 BFP #6 January 2018 Miscarriage (7 weeks) February 2018 BFP #7 April 2018 EDD: 12/23/18
I had a bad announcement experience. I downloaded photos off my phone and had them mailed to me. It had pregnancy test pictures and an ultrasound photo. It was accidentally sent to my mom. I noticed and called the company immediately and had the address corrected. No problem they told me. My mom called me yesterday upset. Clearly she got the pictures (there were 200 total- and 3 were related to my pregnancy) and went though them all, even when she realized it wasn’t something she ordered. Now she is angry with me for not telling her. I told her it was my information to share when I was ready and apologized for the way she found out. There is tension between us now. I’m so upset with how this went.
@Activebaby it’s not your fault at all that your mom was a snoop. It was pretty clearly an error, because if you did send her 200 of your photos as a gift intentionally then it probably would have came with some kind of note. Or looked like a gift at least and not mail with I’m guessing your name but her address?
@Activebaby it’s not your fault at all that your mom was a snoop. It was pretty clearly an error, because if you did send her 200 of your photos as a gift intentionally then it probably would have came with some kind of note. Or looked like a gift at least and not mail with I’m guessing your name but her address?
Im actually unsure of how it was addressed since it was supposed to be my address
Re: Announcement Ideas?
Last time around we said something cheeky at my husband's grandmother's in front of everyone.
This time the grandparents all know. and TW both of my SIL just had miscarriages, (one in Feb, and one this week) so I am not going to be sharing too loudly or in their face.
I am having trouble with figuring out how to tell my sister though... She has been struggling with getting pregnant for around a year, and I want to be as sensitive as possible in sharing the news. Anyone have experience with this? Any advice??
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@katy0990, I didn't even think of that! I wish I was closer to her SO because that would be a good idea. He would know just how to break the news.
So I think my announcement will basically just be an ultrasound pic with the caption "what better way to celebrate Micah's birthday than to see his baby brother or sister for the first time!" or something like that. Our close family and friends already know, so this will be our mass FB announcement.
DS2 due 12/12/18
Type 1 Diabetic
DS: Born 2/18/17
TTC #2: Jan. 2018 BFP: 3/27/18 EDD: 12/6/18
I'm sure your husband will understand if you really want to tell your mom. You could ask her to keep a secret for a couple of weeks. Also, you can still do a "cute" announcement for her. I feel like telling your mom is something special and if you really wanted to, he would understand.
On the other hand, a couple of weeks will go by fast, and it will be just as special no matter when you tell her
My parents were down the next weekend and we told them in person. I had borrowed my mom's hat, which I lost on vacation, so I said something like "There is some good news and some bad news..." then told them about the lost hat and then immediately that I was pregnant. I always lose stuff so I was hoping to distract them. Worked like a charm!
We told my in-laws on the phone the next weekend. I've told a few close friends via text. That's it so far! I don't think we'll make a social media announcement, but we'll start telling more friends and family slowly after the first ultrasound.
that the girls will be big sisters! Then we just told a few other close relatives. We’ll wait until after my doc appointment to tell anyone else. Not sure how yet though. And no FB announcement for us either.
Otherwise, I think I know how I want to tell the family. We'll do it either late June or early July. We'll FaceTime each couple (both of our parents remarried, so it'll be four separate calls) to show them the new house we'll have then. Boxes or not, we'll show them around "this is the master bedroom, look at these windows! Down here is the guest room for you, and this will be the nursery. The office has ...blah blah blah" we'll just shoehorn in an obvious hint. Maybe we'll have furniture up including a crib? Options.
Either way, DH gets to make an excuse for us not going to San Diego for the holidays. He got everybody all worked up about it...but he forgot that I'm due on 12/12. So far the biggest downside of being secretly pg is when DH forgets and makes plans. I could have texted him a reminder, but I didn't want anybody to peek over his shoulder.
Dx: Unspecified IF
BFP#1 Nov 2017 • Blighted Ovum + MMC • D&C at nine weeks
BFP#2 Apr 2018 • It's a boy! • Born 13 Dec 2018
As for my in laws, we plan on telling them on our one year anniversary. We're planning a trip to Hawaii and that would be the first time I would have seen them since our wedding (they live in another country). I'm praying I can keep quite as that reveal will not be until August...
I bought a bathing suit that says baby watch and that's what I'll use as our social media reveal. H wants to keep the pregnancy a secret until I cannot hide the belly anymore. I honestly think I have a month tops to say "oh Im just getting fat from being happily married"
Married: November 2016
BFP #1: 4/3/2018 EDD: 12/16/2018
Married: November 2016
BFP #1: 4/3/2018 EDD: 12/16/2018
DD2: Was 12w at DD1's bday party so had DD1 wear a t-shirt that said "big sister". It took a while for everyone to get it. Hadn't told anyone before then.
This pregnancy: Already told my mom, his mom and my sisters on sort of a need-to-know basis. I've had some wonky beta results and figure I need these people for support if things go south. As far as announcing it to the masses ... well I'll be (hopefully) 12w the week before SO's brother's wedding so we're trying to sort that out as I am worried about stealing thunder from the marrying couple. I figure I hope I still have this problem after this Thursday's viability scan.
Me: 40 | SO: 32
DDs: 11, 7.5 | Due: 22-Dec
We're having another GIRL!!
It's a personal thing. People wait until the second trimester because the chances of something going wrong are a lot smaller. It's completely up to you. Just think if you want all those people to know if something does go wrong (not that it would!)
I'm hoping to give my MIL something that says "Only the best mothers get promoted to grandmothers" as this will be the first grand baby for that side.
For my parents, there's a little box I found on etsy where a tiny bun is inside and a scroll that I'd have saying that we have a bun in the oven.
I've thought about sending some of my long distance friends a little "dragon egg" from the same etsy shoppe and having the scroll say "Winter is Coming, so is our baby".
As far as online announcements, I've seen an image of couples holding up little shoes behind a Christmas-y backdrop saying "Santa isn't the only thing coming this Christmas", but maybe adding a different spin like "Expecting a new angel this Christmas".
Married: August 2013
Son: December 2018
Baby in heaven: February 2020, was due Sept
Married: August 2013
Son: December 2018
Baby in heaven: February 2020, was due Sept
*Rainbow 8/2015*
*Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
*Loss of Twin 5/2018*
I wish I knew computer stuff enough to make something digital for facebook. An image of an egg and then when you hover/click on it it has the wording. Maybe that exists somewhere? Like an e-card.
Married: August 2013
Son: December 2018
Baby in heaven: February 2020, was due Sept
Beautiful Mess Plans Co
Our beautiful girl came into our lives October 15, 2012
TFAS: March 2014
BFP #2 July 2014 Miscarriage (6 weeks) August 2014
BFP #3 September 2014 Chemical Pregnancy September 2014
Seeing the RE: February 2015
Diagnosis PCOS: February 2015
Our rainbow baby came into our lives February 27, 2016
BFP #6 January 2018 Miscarriage (7 weeks) February 2018
BFP #7 April 2018 EDD: 12/23/18