Weekly Questions 3/12 - 3/18 — The Bump
July 2018 Moms

Weekly Questions 3/12 - 3/18

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Re: Weekly Questions 3/12 - 3/18

  • purplepelicanpurplepelican member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited March 12
    Selfishly started.

    Any recommendations on insect repellent? We've got mosquitoes here that carry some pretty nasty diseases, and I'm weighing whether West Nile or DEET would be worse for the baby. Any ideas (ETA on effective alternatives to DEET)?

  • SmashJamSmashJam member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited March 12
    I have used badger balm sunscreen and bug repellent mix (this is really thick, might be bad for sensitive baby skin), but also badger balm stick and badger balm spray for bugs. I think they work great for mosquitos I cover myself in that shit all summer when I head out to the garden or the woods. I have also used Herbal Armor Repellent and that works well too, also all natural probably fine for babies (but check the essential oils it uses, some aren't safe for babies but I bet this is well diluted). They might have a kids one. We have ticks pretty bad around here so I buy separate tick spray but can't remember what it is, I usually pick it up at the co-op. ETA: Green Mountain Tick Repellent! 
    purplepelicannoideawhatshesdoingowl_momma
  • @beanship I was in TN twice this past year and they have some gnarly mosquito issues. I used these mosquito repellent wristbands and did not get bit once. They say safe for children...



    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker

    purplepelican
  • Maternity Leave question:
    My OB recommended I go on leave at least 3-4 weeks before my due date. I am planning on going on leave 3 weeks before. Should I give my manager the heads up now or just wait until a month before? I'm also wanting to ask to wfh come June. How would you go about this?

    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker

  • Anyone else finding themselves having major bladder issues? I do kegals religiously I feel like but honestly if I'm not in the bathroom immediately after I feel the urge to pee I don't make it. The baby prefers to hang out very low in the womb and I feel like she may be on my bladder but idk forsure. Should I bring it up to my Dr or is it just another part of pregnancy? This is my 3rd pregnancy but will be my second living child if that makes a difference. Please say I'm not alone lol
    gingerbride26
  • wildtotwildtot member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    @zombiehoohaa i plan on taking the week before my scheduled c section and i already gave my boss and benefits team a heads up since i have to use PTO.
    zombiehoohaa
  • @kbernal2021 I am a FTM, do my kegals religiously and still find myself running to the bathroom so I do not pee my pants. You are not alone. 

    @wildtot Thank you! I think Im going to email my supervisor and let him know then email hr. Just so they have a tentative time frame.  

    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker

    kbernal2021
  • wildtotwildtot member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    @zombiehoohaa i wish i could do 3-4 weeks like your doc says. Are you eligible for disability during that time or is all your pto/sick time? I could do more time but after talking to my benefits lady i saw that i can use most of it to extend my part time leave through the end of the year and maybe even longer depending on how i break it down. 
    zombiehoohaa
  • @kbernal2021 FTM here, and I also have bladder issues. I pee myself every time I cough or sneeze, too. My OBGYN said it was totally normal. 

    kbernal2021zombiehoohaagingerbride26
  • @zombiehoohaa @SmashjamThank you so much for the recommendations! I'll check those out! 

  • @zombiehoohaa look into your state's laws on reasonable accommodations for pregnancy. In my state employers must provide reasonable accommodations, similar to those with a disability, and one example explicitly given is allowing employees to work from home. It also depends on the nature of your job of course, but I fully intend to work from home full time from 36 weeks until I deliver, and I don't expect my boss to give me a problem, but if she does I will remind her that it's a reasonable accommodation for pregnancy. If you're working from home, would you still need to start your leave 3 weeks early? 
    zombiehoohaa
  • wildtotwildtot member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    @zande2016 that’s a great point! I usually move between two offices but once I’m bigger i will strictly stick to only going to the one my husband works at. My boss is ok with that. I can’t imagine driving that big lol, i got short legs to begin with. 
  • @zombiehoohaa might I ask why your OB recommended that? I mean, if you can swing it 100% do it because it was nice knowing if I went into labor (HA!) that I would be able to leave from home, have things ready, etc. However I hated my job so I said deuces as soon as possible (2 weeks and 4 weeks before due date)for that reason only...I totally could have worked longer. 
  • @kbernal2021 You are not alone. I had a sneeze pee today ten minutes after I used the facility. The ultrasound tech measured 2 cm between my bladder and the where the baby was bouncing.

    @zombiehoohaa I worked until the day I went into labor because I wanted more time with the baby. I think if you talk to your HR and see what they require. I had to submit a doctor’s note saying either that I couldn’t work anymore or that I had the baby. My company is large enough that we fall under FMLA and I get 12 weeks (unpaid) off. 
  • @zombiehoohaa i took a week and a half off before my due date I was so uncomfortable and hurting and it helped to not be at a desk or with clients. I started the conversation of when I would initially be done a month or two before but just kept open communication with them.

  • zombiehoohaazombiehoohaa member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper Photogenic
    edited March 13
    Thanks ladies for the feedback! I live in CA, so state disability for pregnancy allows up to 4 weeks prior to due date, which would take from my 12 weeks. I have pto and sick time saved up, which I planned on using for those 3 weeks to avoid using the fmla until needed. I also have additional short term disability ive been paying for. My Ob recommended I go on leave early because it will give me time to prep for baby (not sure there is such a thing). Her biggest concern was my mental state and not feeling overwhelmed by things. I do have a sedentary job (dev/it). I do have to walk up steep stairs to get to my cubicle. So hopefully, my supervisor will be okay with it. I ended up emailing my supervisor and he letting them know my tentative time frame for leave. Hr responded right away. My boss...well...He has yet to respond, which is typical (he's a month behind on emails as it is).

    @lindsayleigh1989 I've been experiencing that lately. Even the smallest things such as moving laundry from the washer to the dryer or taking a shower...

    Edit: words are not my friend...

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    lindsayleigh1989
  • @zombiehoohaa totally makes sense. There can definitely be some anticipatory anxiety ince you get in the final stretch, nesting chaos not to mention feeling all around uncomfortable from movement and some difficulty sleeping. I wish I had been able to have that myself both these go rounds 
    zombiehoohaa
  • @zombiehoohaa My work gives you off 3 weeks before due date automatically so I can’t help there but while discussing our plans for my leave I just asked if I could work remotely full time starting in April and my bosses were totally fine with it. I’d just ask! 
    zombiehoohaa
  • @lindsayleigh1989 yes! Sometimes even just rolling in bed makes me feel short of breath lol. 

    lindsayleigh1989babybakie
  • @lindsayleigh1989 ALWAYS. The smallest tasks make me feel so unreasonably out of shape. 

    Personally, I worked until me due date with DS- although I did cut my hours, and I worked as a waitress so lots of time on my feet. I think I would have gone crazy waiting around for him to come. I’ll probably do the same with this LO but I only work PT in a pretty sedentary job this time around. 
    zombiehoohaalindsayleigh1989
  • @moguippy I think we should do it other boards also have it!
  •  I live in CA, so state disability for pregnancy allows up to 4 weeks prior to due date, which would take from my 12 weeks. I
    I'm in CA as well and I think the above is incorrect. The 4 weeks prior to your due date is a take it or leave it thing and has no impact on your recovery and bonding leave after birth. In CA we get 4 weeks leave prior to the due date, 6 weeks recovery for vaginal or 8 for C section after birth then 6 weeks bonding leave. 

    My last day of work is Friday June 15, I cannot wait. I'm hoping and praying my leave gets approved to not return till Monday January 14  :#
    BabyFruit Ticker
    Katm89
  • Just got back from seeing my endochronologist, who said my blood pressure was higher than he'd like it and given that I'm only 22 weeks, he's concerned. Last pregnancy I struggled with it and was induced a week early because of it. I know this recent increase might be at least partially caused by the incredible amount of stress I've been under this last month. Between the GD diagnosis, having a difficult time controlling my fasting number, threat of going on insulin, not getting to have the type of birth I really so badly wanted, my husband losing his job, losing all of our insurance, HSA, and FSA benefits, traveling across the country, financial stress, etc, I think it's no wonder my BP is going up. So my question is...does anyone have advice on what I can try to implement in my life to reduce the stress? I already got a used elliptical from a neighbor to start exercising more (but we haven't been able to get it into our basement yet so it's still sitting in the garage unused and honestly trying to get this stupid machine in place has probably added to my stress), and I'd like to also see about adding some yoga and meditation into my days. Maybe a really good but free prenatal yoga app or video, or a meditation app of some sort? Any other ideas of free or really cheap ways of destressing? 
    gingerbride26
  • @zande2016 the program I teach and follow is amazing but it's $18/month. With that said I think they have a 2 week trial for $1 so you could just do that ;) it's just a different kind of prenatal yoga and the meditations are sooo good! After that, yoga with Adrienne is what I would lol for on YouTube. So sorry to hear about all the stress! I'm sure you'll be able to manage the BP, I agree that with everything you've gone through it only makes sense that it went up.
    zande2016acunamatada
  • @zande2016 cut out salt. like literally any salt you can get rid of it. Since you are probably already looking at nutrition facts of your food take a look at the salt content too.  Hopefully that will help a little
    zande2016acunamatada
  • @runsomewhere You may just be right...I was going off of my employee manual, which provides the CA disability for pregnancy. I will look it up further...either way, being off before baby is due is something that sounds really good right now. 

    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker

  • @kissableviv what's the name of your program? (You can PM me if you prefer). 

    @moguippy that's probably a good idea, would also help with swelling. I don't think I'm getting too much sodium right now since I've cut out most processed foods, but cheese is one source of protein I've been relying on and that's probably not great for sodium content. 
  • @zande2016 luckily my BP has been good (not great) but I know if it gets bad I will have to cut out cheese. and that makes me sad. cheese is so good
  • Ugh seriously! Cheese is like the one good thing I can still eat with GD! I've had enough almonds to last me a lifetime at this point. 
  • @lindsayleigh1989 I'm with you on being out if breath! It's so annoying but apparently it's common. I read it could be due to your lungs being crowded but my Dr. said the other day it is from hormones.  That's his answer for everything. Lol

    While I was at the Dr the other day I mentioned i think I feel the baby, it feels like soft little muscle spasms. I was so disappointed that he said it's probably not and most FTMs don't feel anything until 24 weeks. I'm 21 weeks. He said I'm dehydrated, and that that could cause muscle spasms or Braxton Hicks. At my 20 week scan a different Dr said not to be surprised if i dont feel kicks for a few more weeks because of my anterior placenta. Does anyone know how to tell the difference between little kicks and muscle spasms? I looked up Braxton Hicks and I don't think that's what I feel because my entire belly is not tensing. 




  • @babybakie while BH doesn’t have to be the whole ute tensing up, it usually does for me.. but either way early baby movements totally felt like little muscle twitches, I guess you’ll know either way in a couple weeks- they’ll either get stronger or you’ll feel them differently. But my bets on baby! 

    @zande2016  yoga yoga yoga!  Even doing 30 minutes at home puts me in a better mindset for the day. I do free videos on youtube, mostly Yoga With Adrienne and I’ll cast them to my tv. I haven’t used this in a while so I’m not sure if it’s still free but headspace was a good mindfulness/meditation app that literally saved my sanity when I was getting through school. 
    zande2016babybakieSmashJamKatm89
  • @babybakie I guess every OB is different?  mine asked me yesterday if i could feel baby (21w4d FTM), but she asked it like she was expecting me to say yes. I don't have an anterior placenta though, but I have been feeling kicks (what feels like little muscle spasms as well) for like 2 weeks.
    babybakie
  • @babybakie I have an anterior placenta and have most definitely Been feeling kicks for a few weeks now, currently 22 weeks. Id say in the last week or so I started feeling them on the outside. The lighter ones are easy to question, but then you'll get a big jab and know for sure that's what it is. Also, no offense to your OB, but he's never been pregnant (I assume lol) and it's not exactly a feeling you can learn about in a text book. I say it very well could be baby you're feeling, but you'll know for sure soon. 
    babybakiezombiehoohaaacunamatada
  • Thank you guys !! I think you are right! I do think, and well, hope it's baby!

    @acunamatada @moguippy I'm very glad to hear tiny muscle spasms could describe the feeling of baby and thats what you describe too. I can't wait for them to be stronger!

    @zande2016 lol! Right?! That's what I thought too. How the heck would he know!? How exciting that you can actually feel them on the outside now! 
  • Agreed with @zande2016:) I've been feeling little flutters at 19 weeks and since then they have become more obvious kicks, plus he has his active times ;) DH could feel them and of I look closely I can see them from the outside. But I know because of the placenta I'm not going to freak out until 25ish weeks in case he goes quiet for a few hours.
    babybakie
  • @babybakie like others have said, I too have been feeling lots of movement for the past few weeks and I am 21+2 today.  I just visited my doc this morning and she said it's totally 'normal' to be feeling baby now, she said they are likely light movements and random, and that they will get stronger and more predictable as baby grows.
    BabyFruit Ticker
    Me: 27 │DH: 29
    Married: 7/16/2016
    BFP #1 11/12/2017
    babybakie
  • @babybakie +1 for it to be totally possible to be baby! I have an anterior placenta and have been feeling them for a couple weeks for sure. Babe is head down right now all my feeling is directly above the pubic bone, so maybe its less padded there? who knows! But they do feel muscle spasm-y and I feel like a good way to guess if its baby or not is where they are.


    babybakie
  • Wow so much jealousy here for good companies and states :( @zombiehoohaa - catching up but completely agree you need to talk to HR and your boss to determine your company and state rules.  As a manager, I would appreciate as much heads up as possible for work load planning purposes.  With DD i went out starting on my actual due date - I'm still partially convinced that I went late because of stress - which ended up being a week before induction/delivery.  It was very nice having that break of just me and the fur baby to breath, last min pampering, and wrap my brain around becoming a mom.
    @zande2016 not sure about cost with your health benefit concerns, but honestly, seeing a therapist to just talk about the crap giving me anxiety has been HUGE for me.  In hindsight, I've always had high functioning anxiety and had some PPA after DD, wish I started seeing someone earlier.  For me it's $20 per session with health insurance - I've done the Employee Assistance Program thing before where work will fund X sessions, and I know my college used to offer free/discounted sessions at the school of Psychology to help students get experience hours for certifications and graduation.  Stress and anxiety are killers with hormones and life changes coming on you - it could take some trial and error to find what works for you.  I read or craft/paint to de-stress, some of my friends do repetitive activity with their hands like knitting. I find i just need to get out of my head for a little bit and break the stress cycle so it doesn't just keep spiraling. Don't get discouraged if the first few things you try don't cut it, takes a while to find the right fit.
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