@LaceyBee522 I mean, I'm sure they all have some gaps here and there so plenty of opportunity to get lucky with timing, I guess. But also v v expensive here. Like, so much more reasonable in LA and SF... Def start looking now tho!
@doxiemoxie212 maybe if you look for just a family photographer that you like as far as their style/aesthetic goes and you just happen to also be pregnant.
As far as new born pictures, I'm no help. MH's good friend is a photographer and actually really good, not one of "friend who is a photographer" that everyone knows, so he will do our NB photos. He does live 4+ hours away but since photography is his only job he will be able to travel during the week to come do the photos at our house, even though he is booked solid because of summer weddings. I really want a lifestyle shoot just in our house. Like we will go about our day with our new baby and he will capture all the moments.
Also, if anyone is interested in Bradley method classes, we had our first class last night, you definitely still have time to find a class, maybe not @doxiemoxie212 in NYC lol. It does kind of suck that the two other couples are two months ahead of me but not that big of a deal as far as the class goes. One of the husbands is so annoying and interjects with meaningless banter all the time and I might punch him. Lord help me for the next 10 weeks. So far the actual class is good. We went over some pain management things and did a relaxation exercise where the husbands helped us relax. Our "homework" for the week is to do a food log/diary to help us see how much protein were getting and I am realizing that I thought I was doing ok with just my regular diet but I most certainly am not.
*TW LC*
Me & MH: 32 DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU) TTC #2: 12/2019 Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18
@doxiemoxie212@krashke I'm now searching newborn photographers frantically. I'm also crying like an idiot. No idea why stranger babies are hitting me so hard today.
@krashke You inspired me and I sat down to book the classes offered at my hospital. They are one-offs and I booked them all in 3rd tri... breastfeeding, childcare basics newborn thru 1st year, and Marathon Saturday class that goes 9-430pm. We have to bring a doll? I'm going to have to ask around to borrow one lol.
On the photog topic... I read that our hospital birth center contracts with a photographer and a complimentary newborn shoot is done on babys first full day at the hospital. Purchasing photos is optional but the pics go up on a password protected site that you can share with family far away. That will be nice because our family is spread out over 3 continents! Maybe other hospitals do that too?
Where is everyone looking into/doing classes? They have some at the hospital, but they are at crappy times- like 5-830p on a Wednesday. Ok....so maybe if I try to get out of work early I could make it, but when am I going to eat? I feel like some of them aren't necessary, as well. I'd like to do a childbirth class, and some basic newborn care classes maybe, and breastfeeding. I have delivered babies, so I know what happens on that end, but the provider isn't in the room the entire time you're in labor, so I have no experience with that.
I need to look more into childcare. It's stressing me out so much. I'm so nervous about leaving my 3 month old with someone or somewhere. I'm hoping I can go back to 4 10s (or even better, 3 12s!!) And be home a day, and maybe MH's parents can help sometimes (they are retired, but I hate to suck up their retirement with babysitting). But most daycares around here are $1500-2k/mo or $95-150/day...so me being home one day and paying for 4 days won't necessarily save money. I need to figure out how to find in home care around me as well.
Guys I stopped bumping while traveling over the holiday and oh man have I missed it. Thank you ladies for giving me the kick in the pants I need. In the course of reading this thread I've opened no less than 18 tabs in 2 windows... can't decide whether I feel more behind on daycare, childbirth classes or maternity photography (which I never knew was a thing but now WANT).
Anyway... I'm 16+1 today, still relatively symptom free but definitely starting to show. I finally told my boss and others at work yesterday, and it was crazy the flood of excitement I felt about this baby once the news was out. I only started this job last summer, and I guess didn't fully appreciate the amount of stress I was carrying around about their reaction. In other news, MH has almost convinced me to abandon Team Green and find out the baby's sex when the time comes We have until our anatomy scan on Feb. 13 to decide, so the negotiations continue. Stay tuned!
Guys we still have plenty of time. I would say I'm a little precocious in the birth classes. I am doing Bradley Method which is usually 10-12 weeks of classes so I wanted to get started sooner rather than later, and it's what fit with the instructors class schedule. I would say it is important to figure out the general feel of your birth plan and then find a class that fits with that. I chose Bradley because we are shooting for a med-free, intervention-free birth. Like @ramblebee I wanted to learn about the whole process, labor/delivery, breastfeeding and newborn care. The classes I found through the hospital covered all of those topics individually and each one cost $150-200. Bradley classes will cover all of those things and the total cost was $375.
As far as day care, we are not having a ton of luck at the moment, we are in the Minneapolis metro. We have found a number of centers with availability but in-home is harder because they are only allowed one infant under 12 months and most of them will reserve a spot for the families of kids they already have for future planned pregnancies. But all hope is not lost, we have decided that if we do not find an in-home in time for my return to work we are going to send them to a center for a few months and keep trying to get a spot for Nov or later. We will be spending more up front but once we get into a cheaper in-home we will be back on budget.
If you're wondering how to find an in-home provider, we went onto the state Department of Human Services page and they will have a list of licensed family care providers. The one for MN is awful to search through but MH found a link to a site called parentaware.org it is a MN site but I imagine other states have something similar. On that site you can find centers and family care providers and search by a map. We then favorited the ones in the areas we wanted and copied them into a google sheet that we both have been calling and updating from.
sorry for the novel
*TW LC*
Me & MH: 32 DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU) TTC #2: 12/2019 Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18
@krashke - I was actually just about to comment about how to find in home daycare providers, buy it looks like you covered it. Any state licensed provider has to be registered with your state, so that's definitely the place to start.
At least here in Ohio licensed providers are required to take state subsidized rates for childcare. I found that the ones here (rural area) essentially charge the same rate for private pay as they get for their subsidized kids (it was $140 a week for full time when we first started looking for DS1 5 years ago). Perhaps one reason you guys may not be hearing rates from providers over the phone is because they want to know if you're private pay or not. There may be different rates depending on who is footing the bill.
First Son - born 2013
Second Son - born 2014 - Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome (HLHS) and Double Outlet Right Ventricle (DORV). First open heart surgery at 5 days old. He's had 3 open heart surgeries and several other procedures and is currently doing amazing. Third Son - due June 9, 2018
Feeling ok, super congested with pretty consistent nose bleeds. I haven’t had any morning sickness this entire time...so I feel like the extra symptoms now are helping balance things out haha.
Advice...man, I have had some advice! I work in domestic violence prevention and my job is to engage community partners and fundraisers and manage the agencies many volunteers. This is a fairly small community so work and life overlaps a lot. I’m good at my job because I’m vey congenial, people like to talk to me and I encourage people to be really honest and give me feedback which I receive well...this approach has served me very well...but it’s suddenly backfiring enormously! I’ve been asked about birth, am I scared because XYZ could happen, am I going to “mutilate” my baby boys penis with circumcision, my bump is so small, I should eat more. Why am I still coming to our local brewery with my husband because “you know you can’t drink beer” I have a great team and friends who I can laugh about this with and very little bothers me, but it’s bizarre all the same. I’ve started just saying “yknow, I appreciate your views but i’d rather not discuss that much further right now” or I laugh if something makes me and say “that’s an odd thing to ask/say”
Best advice I've gotten...is to trust my body, do my research and make my own decisions about what’s right for my baby.
Also, I can bring baby to work with me for the first 9months - year and hubby is on a 5am-1pm shift starting February so ge can pick up baby from my work after lunch I was nervous about the reality of that plan but looking forward to it because it’ll save us a LOT of money...but now he’s looking at other jobs out of state. If we decide to move, I’ll be looking for a new job and I’m sure that will involve finding day care. Reading these posts about that process just gave me anxiety
A little late to the party! I haven't done one of these in a few weeks because I never feel I have anything exciting happening, lol.
How far along are you? 19+1
How are things going? Great so far! Feeling lots of little nudges and twitches! I actually had more congestion during my first tri, but I find that it can still get funky now and then. I really don't have any other complaints except shortness of breath sometimes. Oh, and an intense episode of dry heaves over the toilet. Like, no MS for the first tri and now you're gonna pull that on me? Cheeky baby. Other than, I really haven't had anything else that I can recall. No food aversions/cravings that I can think of, other than a desire for Caesar salad, which have now been axed due to the PSA. Womp womp. I did have a very compelling desire for fried chicken and grapes for a week in my early pregnancy, but since then I'm pretty much okay to eat anything! It's kind of weird, it's more if I imagine I smell something I'll obsessively think about it until I get to eat it rather than random cravings!
Has anyone given you and good, useful, funny or just ridiculous advice? Nope. My family lives in the UK, Sweden and New Zealand so there's a lot of distance between us and it can make having regular discussions a challenge with the time difference. I'm the first of three kids to be expecting in my immediate family so no siblings to offer advice either. In-laws are always away too (west coast) so I rarely see them. Have yet to tell my best friend who lives in a totally different state; figured I'd wait until my AS next week. With my last pregnancy (loss) that I mentioned to her she started imagining her own pregnancy symptoms and got her BF to run out and buy some tests, so I found that a little weird. She has a tendency to get envious of seeing others getting engaged/married/have babies so I've kept the news to myself for now!
I'm by no means a professional photographer (although I studied it as my major). I did a pregnancy portrait for my SIL. She didn't want to do a maternity shoot either, but we decided to see if we could get at least one shot for fun since I was visiting. No special equipment; not a super fancy camera and for lighting I just used diffused light coming from a window. I got her to wear black and used her hands to contrast and accentuate the shape of her bump. Her eyes are closed and it created a very serene vibe. Might be cheesy, but I enjoy the intimacy of the shot. I personally find that this angle to be the best for exaggerating the bump's size (you'll notice a similar angle I did of my own in HDBD). For reference, she was a FTM at about 6.5 months here.
How are things going? Pretty well. Lately I have been dealing with super itchy stomach and boobs. Also I feel like the boob pain has increased since 1st tri. I had my first bout of constipation a few weeks ago, that was super painful and now I do everything to avoid that occurring again.
Has anyone given you and good, useful, funny or just ridiculous advice? A few people told me that it's okay to drink a glass of wine or 2 because they did it while they were pregnant and baby was just fine. Sorry, not drinking at all during this pregnancy and I didn't think it was appropriate for that to be suggested. It was first brought up by my DH's aunt at Xmas, she thought I would have a glass of wine with her right after we announced. Another thing that annoyed me, was family members who wanted to announce our pregnancy on social media to their friends before my DH and I announced. We obviously put a stop to that before any of them could do it, but really? Do people have no common sense/decency? It's not their place to announce our pregnancy before we do, IMO.
I have also been looking into daycares and I am pretty sure we have one picked out. We prefer in home and found a lady in our neighborhood who is not overpriced. She charges $3.25 an hour for a newborn and we would only need maybe 30 hours a week. I thought that was affordable, especially when I hear people pay $5 or more per hour in our area...no thanks. We had in home daycare and a daycare center with our DS and we liked in home better overall. On a plus side, it seems that rates are much cheaper at in home daycares.
26 y/o FTM (biologically)
1 Child - Son - 9 y/o Married - DH 27 y/o BFP: 10/13/17 EDD: 6/22/18
@srb1028 Seriously? What's up with people thinking it's acceptable to announce such a major life event on behalf of others? If someone even asked me that I'd be like...
@srb1028 - You reminded me. The only advice I've gotten so far was the same as yours! H's step-aunt told me that she drank 2+ wine coolers a night during her pregnancies, and was trying to get me to drink a whole glass of my own wine with that reasoning. Like, yeah, okay. I see how your kids turned out. They may not have fetal alcohol syndrome, but they sure aren't the brightest lights in the house, and they have horrible behaviour. No thanks.
@silvergreen yes! This has been my face for many many conversations during my pregnancy!! I have also had people ask me repeatedly if I know I can drink if I want to, and one friend tell me he’d make sure I got some champagne on NYE even when I said I was good.
It mostly seems to me that non parents have the strongest opinions.
@srb1028@izza2@helenbz Wow. I'd heard of pregnant women getting stranger input on their decision to drink, but such forceful opinions on a choice not to are just bizarre. I'd like to think they come from a good place of trying to remove any stigma around your having a glass of wine if that's what you actually, secretly want, but I dunno. That's a lot of insisting.
I put the occasional glass of wine question in the same category as the breastfeeding conversation. Know the research that's out there, make a personal decision about what you're comfortable with and then, by God, please let other women do the same when it comes to their bodies and their children. My doctor gets to advise, my husband gets a vote and everyone else needs to shut the hell up.
How are you feeling? Good, just wish she'd stop jumping on my cervix.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy? Nothing really. My friends are so clueless about babies. A few have asked if I'm going to get an elective c-section at like 36-weeks, but they mean it genuinely. I just explain that most OBs won't do scheduled c-sections that early, especially not for FTMs with no risks. lol And also that I'm really hoping I don't have to have a c-section...
@doxiemoxie212 That's interesting that your friends know to ask about an elective c-section. I only knew it was an opiton because one friend had gone through it.
I should probably save this for a FFFC, but I'm totally team elective c-section. I'm not afraid of the pain of labor. However, I am afraid of laboring for 24 or 30 hours and then being told I have to go in for major surgery.
How far along are you?? 18+3
How are you feeling? Feeling good. My appetitie is back which is both a blessing and a curse. I know I need to get food in and eat protein, but I'm so happy with my 10 pound loss and my doc is so happy that I've maintained that, I just don't want to dissaoint her.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy? I don't know if this annoying/strange, but so many people ask about the sex of the babies when I tell them I'm pregnant. Then, they seem genuinely annoyed that we aren't finding out. First of all, most of the people asking aren't close friends (maybe they are just feigning interest?) because our close friends/family know we aren't finding out. Secondly, why are YOU annoyed?? My grandma keeps asking about names. She's really pushing for Christine (which is a hard no from me because of Christines in my past) or Christopher (which we're considering for a middle).
@LaceyBee522 I think it's just from TV/movies or something? None of them really know anyone who has had kids. Re: team green annoyance, I think it's probably that they imagine their partner wanting to be team green and take out their annoyance on you instead lol. I hate surprises, and I am so so so curious, so I would've been so mad if DH wanted to be team green. But I think it's fun when people who like surprises can stick with it. I wish I liked surprises!
@doxiemoxie212 Lol! Everyone thinks it is like the movies/tv! When I tell friends I'm delivering on the upper east side, they're all shocked that I would be willing to travel the 20/30 minutes by car to get to my hospital. I'm like, guys, calm down, this isn't like the movies. When I go into labor, there will be A LOT of waiting for things to happen.
How are you feeling? I have been having horrible low back/hip pain on my left side that googles says could be my sciatic nerve. I went to yoga the other day hoping that would help stretch it out but no such luck. It gets really bad at night and when I wake up I can barely get out of bed. I have been sleeping with a pillow between my knees or under my leg but it is freaking annoying. I'm hoping my dr can give me better exercises to do or help me figure out what it is.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy? Not really questions but everyone is surprised by how far along I am because I still don't have much of a bump. Most conversations go like this Friend/coworker/stranger: "How far long are you?" Me: "19 weeks. Almost half-way there!" Them: "WOW! You don't look pregnant at all." Thanks that makes me feel great. Would you like to see the ultrasound? On top of that I'm a little concerned I haven't gain enough weight so you making a point of saying I don't look pregnant doesn't help.
@LaceyBee522 yay team green! I have mentioned to a couple coworkers that our a/s is on Thursday and they immediately start getting excited and talking about the gender and asking if we're excited to start planning the nursery and then I tell them were not finding out and they're just like "oh that's fun" I think a lot of the older generation is a little jealous that we have the technology to find out and think if you can then why not.
@doxiemoxie212 it seems like it might also be more common in NYC to have an elective c-section. I am also hoping to avoid one at all costs. It just seems like it would eff up your abdominals forever.
*TW LC*
Me & MH: 32 DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU) TTC #2: 12/2019 Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18
@krashke yeah, every woman in my family has had a c-section (not by choice), and DH's mom had 4 c-sections (DH was not by choice, but the other 3 were scheduled). So I know they're manageable and not the end of the world, but it just seems like recovery is so much more difficult. I want to be able to walk around and pick up the baby, etc., without being in excruciating pain for a couple weeks. RE: sciatic pain, I had that non-baby-related a couple years ago and it is THE WORST. I was lucky that it just sort of randomly went away on its own, but I have seen those ads on TV that say there are knee things you can buy? I don't really know how it works, but something about compressing the nerve a bit right below your knee can help?? Maybe look into it...? I had a coworker who had it for her entire pregnancy, though, and literally nothing helped. FX that is not the case for you.
So I completely missed this thread the last couple weeks.
How far along are you?? 20 weeks today (YAY!)
How are you feeling? Good. A/S was this morning and everything was normal. So I'm feeling GREAT. Things are starting to feel a bit heavy especially when I first stand up so I'm thinking I need to order a belly support band thing soon/ now.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy? In the beginning I was asked was it planned, or people just assumed it wasn't planned. We hadn't told any of our friends (except one for me) that we were ttgp, and in the past I'd said I wanted to start trying after 2 years of marriage (we'd only been married 13 months when we started trying and got pg right away). But I didn't like being asked that. It was also annoying to get that response from friends bc I felt like I was expected to tell them everything thing, when I don't and I'm not.
We are team green and everyone who has asked if we are finding out has responded affirming our decision to be surprised. "Yes, that is the way to do it" "That's exactly what we did" blah blah People are really all over the place.
How far along are you?? 19weeks today
How are you feeling? Still getting over a cold. Again. Vaporizer, saline sprays, Vicks, Chapstick, breathe right strips, Benadryl, hot showers, sleep. Otherwise ok. Nothing exciting.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy? I was also asked if baby was planned, which was a little weird and felt too personal. I know we surprised almost everyone because we have been married almost 10 years and I'm still finishing my degree... but to know me is to know I'm a planner and there is no mistake this baby is coming 3 weeks after my graduation date (fingers crossed baby stays put that long!)
I have friends who said they were annoyed when people asked how they or the baby were feeling and I don't feel annoyed about that at all. At least they care enough to ask.
How far along are you?? 19+4 How are you feeling? Better....but still getting sick. Not nearly as often. For example I threw up Friday and then not again until today. Other than that, I did join the park district gym and have been going and walking on the track for a few miles a few times per week, and I swam some laps last night. I was a collegiate swimmer back in the day, so swimming is actually an more relaxed exercise for me. It felt pretty good, I'm just so buoyant, lol. What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy? What's the name? We have chosen not to share the name. For some reason some people get so upset by this. I even have some co-workers begging. No, it's not going to be a secret between me, MH, and YOU. Geez.
I have also had an equal number of people tell me I look WAAAAAAAY too big for almost 20 weeks, and then others tell me I look too little. Thanks. I think my body knows what it's doing, I've gained about 6-7 pounds, and so far everything checks out with the babe.
Found this, thought you might all find it interesting. It states the probability of going into labor on any given day given your due date. Obviously statistics mean nothing when you're an outlier, but I like to plan for the most likely scenarios, so I found this helpful.
I'm still suffering from morning sickness. Diclegis isn't working for me at all. I'm calling my doctor this morning and telling them I need Zofran or I'm going to go crazy. I'm lucky if I keep food down, and prenatals are a joke. I bought gummies because I figured they'd at least start to digest quicker, but they usually just come right back up anyway. *sigh*
We didn't announce until last night, so no real questions yet. The most I've gotten is whether I wanted a boy or girl, and people just don't want to accept the fact I didn't really care as long as he's healthy.
How are you feeling? Good, although yesterday felt crappy due to a headache that kept coming back. Still dealing with congestion but it's not terrible. Oh and constipation.... ugh. I miss being "regular" lol
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy? I haven't really been asked anything too annoying yet. I also got the "do you want a boy or a girl" and I always just say I don't care I just want to know (2 more weeks ahhhh). I get asked about names too which we don't plan to share either so I just say "we have a few ideas but we're not sure yet" which is true at this point.
How are you feeling? Fine. I have been feeling some more stretching pains lately, plus her little kicks. Also, I still fit into my regular clothes as of right now, so even though I really want that cute baby bump, I guess I'm happy that I get to wait a while longer before things get uncomfortable.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy? Not much really. Same as the others about names but we're not 100%. I'm sure they will come though!
@doxiemoxie212 this is cool/interesting. I'm team first week of June all the way so I'm hoping he's 5-10 days early anyway. School (here and where I'm from) always ends the first week in June. Seems like the perfect time to have a birthday party for a kid.
@ramblebee I feel the same way, I'd imagine our attitudes would change as it gets closer, we get bigger and pregnancy gets miserable. I read this pregnancy book that includes stories from all sorts of celebrities and even the fittest, prettiest, well taken care of super models report being absolutely miserable the last month of pregnancy.
@doxiemoxie212 Those are interesting stats - I didn't realize there's a less than 3% chance of giving birth on any given day. I'd think they'd be higher than that around the due date!
How far along are you?? 20+4
How are you feeling? Pretty good! I felt some definite movement last night that MH could feel too, so that was pretty cool and weird.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy?
I have a coworker that asks me how I'm feeling every day. It's getting so old. I figure she asks because it's an easy way to start the conversation, but I don't know what to tell her besides "fine". And I've been asked a couple times if the pregnancy was planned, which to me is just so personal!
Me: 32 | DH: 36
Married June 2005
1/2016 - TTC#1
4/2017 - Initial RE visit, Dx: Severe MFI (Varicocele, 14% motility, 3% progression, but normal count)
7/2017 - Stage 3 endometriosis discovered during laparoscopic removal of ovarian cyst
9/27/2017 - BFP at 10dpo (cycle 22), baby boy due June 9, 2018
Re: FTM Check-in {January}
As far as new born pictures, I'm no help. MH's good friend is a photographer and actually really good, not one of "friend who is a photographer" that everyone knows, so he will do our NB photos. He does live 4+ hours away but since photography is his only job he will be able to travel during the week to come do the photos at our house, even though he is booked solid because of summer weddings. I really want a lifestyle shoot just in our house. Like we will go about our day with our new baby and he will capture all the moments.
Also, if anyone is interested in Bradley method classes, we had our first class last night, you definitely still have time to find a class, maybe not @doxiemoxie212 in NYC lol. It does kind of suck that the two other couples are two months ahead of me but not that big of a deal as far as the class goes. One of the husbands is so annoying and interjects with meaningless banter all the time and I might punch him. Lord help me for the next 10 weeks. So far the actual class is good. We went over some pain management things and did a relaxation exercise where the husbands helped us relax. Our "homework" for the week is to do a food log/diary to help us see how much protein were getting and I am realizing that I thought I was doing ok with just my regular diet but I most certainly am not.
DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
TTC #2: 12/2019
Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18
DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
TTC #2: 12/2019
Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18
On the photog topic... I read that our hospital birth center contracts with a photographer and a complimentary newborn shoot is done on babys first full day at the hospital. Purchasing photos is optional but the pics go up on a password protected site that you can share with family far away. That will be nice because our family is spread out over 3 continents! Maybe other hospitals do that too?
I need to look more into childcare. It's stressing me out so much. I'm so nervous about leaving my 3 month old with someone or somewhere. I'm hoping I can go back to 4 10s (or even better, 3 12s!!) And be home a day, and maybe MH's parents can help sometimes (they are retired, but I hate to suck up their retirement with babysitting). But most daycares around here are $1500-2k/mo or $95-150/day...so me being home one day and paying for 4 days won't necessarily save money. I need to figure out how to find in home care around me as well.
Anyway... I'm 16+1 today, still relatively symptom free but definitely starting to show. I finally told my boss and others at work yesterday, and it was crazy the flood of excitement I felt about this baby once the news was out. I only started this job last summer, and I guess didn't fully appreciate the amount of stress I was carrying around about their reaction. In other news, MH has almost convinced me to abandon Team Green and find out the baby's sex when the time comes
Guys we still have plenty of time. I would say I'm a little precocious in the birth classes. I am doing Bradley Method which is usually 10-12 weeks of classes so I wanted to get started sooner rather than later, and it's what fit with the instructors class schedule. I would say it is important to figure out the general feel of your birth plan and then find a class that fits with that. I chose Bradley because we are shooting for a med-free, intervention-free birth. Like @ramblebee I wanted to learn about the whole process, labor/delivery, breastfeeding and newborn care. The classes I found through the hospital covered all of those topics individually and each one cost $150-200. Bradley classes will cover all of those things and the total cost was $375.
As far as day care, we are not having a ton of luck at the moment, we are in the Minneapolis metro. We have found a number of centers with availability but in-home is harder because they are only allowed one infant under 12 months and most of them will reserve a spot for the families of kids they already have for future planned pregnancies. But all hope is not lost, we have decided that if we do not find an in-home in time for my return to work we are going to send them to a center for a few months and keep trying to get a spot for Nov or later. We will be spending more up front but once we get into a cheaper in-home we will be back on budget.
If you're wondering how to find an in-home provider, we went onto the state Department of Human Services page and they will have a list of licensed family care providers. The one for MN is awful to search through but MH found a link to a site called parentaware.org it is a MN site but I imagine other states have something similar. On that site you can find centers and family care providers and search by a map. We then favorited the ones in the areas we wanted and copied them into a google sheet that we both have been calling and updating from.
sorry for the novel
DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
TTC #2: 12/2019
Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18
At least here in Ohio licensed providers are required to take state subsidized rates for childcare. I found that the ones here (rural area) essentially charge the same rate for private pay as they get for their subsidized kids (it was $140 a week for full time when we first started looking for DS1 5 years ago). Perhaps one reason you guys may not be hearing rates from providers over the phone is because they want to know if you're private pay or not. There may be different rates depending on who is footing the bill.
First Son - born 2013
Third Son - due June 9, 2018
Feeling ok, super congested with pretty consistent nose bleeds. I haven’t had any morning sickness this entire time...so I feel like the extra symptoms now are helping balance things out haha.
Advice...man, I have had some advice! I work in domestic violence prevention and my job is to engage community partners and fundraisers and manage the agencies many volunteers. This is a fairly small community so work and life overlaps a lot. I’m good at my job because I’m vey congenial, people like to talk to me and I encourage people to be really honest and give me feedback which I receive well...this approach has served me very well...but it’s suddenly backfiring enormously! I’ve been asked about birth, am I scared because XYZ could happen, am I going to “mutilate” my baby boys penis with circumcision, my bump is so small, I should eat more. Why am I still coming to our local brewery with my husband because “you know you can’t drink beer” I have a great team and friends who I can laugh about this with and very little bothers me, but it’s bizarre all the same. I’ve started just saying “yknow, I appreciate your views but i’d rather not discuss that much further right now” or I laugh if something makes me and say “that’s an odd thing to ask/say”
Best advice I've gotten...is to trust my body, do my research and make my own decisions about what’s right for my baby.
How far along are you?
19+1
How are things going?
Great so far! Feeling lots of little nudges and twitches! I actually had more congestion during my first tri, but I find that it can still get funky now and then. I really don't have any other complaints except shortness of breath sometimes. Oh, and an intense episode of dry heaves over the toilet. Like, no MS for the first tri and now you're gonna pull that on me? Cheeky baby. Other than, I really haven't had anything else that I can recall. No food aversions/cravings that I can think of, other than a desire for Caesar salad, which have now been axed due to the PSA. Womp womp.
Has anyone given you and good, useful, funny or just ridiculous advice?
Nope. My family lives in the UK, Sweden and New Zealand so there's a lot of distance between us and it can make having regular discussions a challenge with the time difference. I'm the first of three kids to be expecting in my immediate family so no siblings to offer advice either. In-laws are always away too (west coast) so I rarely see them. Have yet to tell my best friend who lives in a totally different state; figured I'd wait until my AS next week. With my last pregnancy (loss) that I mentioned to her she started imagining her own pregnancy symptoms and got her BF to run out and buy some tests, so I found that a little weird. She has a tendency to get envious of seeing others getting engaged/married/have babies so I've kept the news to myself for now!
DS born 9/24/2020
ETA: I blurred her face for privacy!
How are things going? Pretty well. Lately I have been dealing with super itchy stomach and boobs. Also I feel like the boob pain has increased since 1st tri. I had my first bout of constipation a few weeks ago, that was super painful and now I do everything to avoid that occurring again.
Has anyone given you and good, useful, funny or just ridiculous advice? A few people told me that it's okay to drink a glass of wine or 2 because they did it while they were pregnant and baby was just fine. Sorry, not drinking at all during this pregnancy and I didn't think it was appropriate for that to be suggested. It was first brought up by my DH's aunt at Xmas, she thought I would have a glass of wine with her right after we announced. Another thing that annoyed me, was family members who wanted to announce our pregnancy on social media to their friends before my DH and I announced. We obviously put a stop to that before any of them could do it, but really? Do people have no common sense/decency? It's not their place to announce our pregnancy before we do, IMO.
I have also been looking into daycares and I am pretty sure we have one picked out. We prefer in home and found a lady in our neighborhood who is not overpriced. She charges $3.25 an hour for a newborn and we would only need maybe 30 hours a week. I thought that was affordable, especially when I hear people pay $5 or more per hour in our area...no thanks. We had in home daycare and a daycare center with our DS and we liked in home better overall. On a plus side, it seems that rates are much cheaper at in home daycares.
Married - DH 27 y/o
BFP: 10/13/17
EDD: 6/22/18
Like, yeah, okay. I see how your kids turned out. They may not have fetal alcohol syndrome, but they sure aren't the brightest lights in the house, and they have horrible behaviour. No thanks.
Me: 30 | DH: 34 | DSS: 14 | DS: 4
PG #2, EDD 10/12/2023
It mostly seems to me that non parents have the strongest opinions.
I put the occasional glass of wine question in the same category as the breastfeeding conversation. Know the research that's out there, make a personal decision about what you're comfortable with and then, by God, please let other women do the same when it comes to their bodies and their children. My doctor gets to advise, my husband gets a vote and everyone else needs to shut the hell up.
How far along are you??
How are you feeling?
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy?
How are you feeling? Good, just wish she'd stop jumping on my cervix.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy? Nothing really. My friends are so clueless about babies. A few have asked if I'm going to get an elective c-section at like 36-weeks, but they mean it genuinely. I just explain that most OBs won't do scheduled c-sections that early, especially not for FTMs with no risks. lol And also that I'm really hoping I don't have to have a c-section...
I should probably save this for a FFFC, but I'm totally team elective c-section. I'm not afraid of the pain of labor. However, I am afraid of laboring for 24 or 30 hours and then being told I have to go in for major surgery.
How far along are you?? 18+3
How are you feeling? Feeling good. My appetitie is back which is both a blessing and a curse. I know I need to get food in and eat protein, but I'm so happy with my 10 pound loss and my doc is so happy that I've maintained that, I just don't want to dissaoint her.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy? I don't know if this annoying/strange, but so many people ask about the sex of the babies when I tell them I'm pregnant. Then, they seem genuinely annoyed that we aren't finding out. First of all, most of the people asking aren't close friends (maybe they are just feigning interest?) because our close friends/family know we aren't finding out. Secondly, why are YOU annoyed?? My grandma keeps asking about names. She's really pushing for Christine (which is a hard no from me because of Christines in my past) or Christopher (which we're considering for a middle).
How are you feeling? I have been having horrible low back/hip pain on my left side that googles says could be my sciatic nerve. I went to yoga the other day hoping that would help stretch it out but no such luck. It gets really bad at night and when I wake up I can barely get out of bed. I have been sleeping with a pillow between my knees or under my leg but it is freaking annoying. I'm hoping my dr can give me better exercises to do or help me figure out what it is.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy? Not really questions but everyone is surprised by how far along I am because I still don't have much of a bump. Most conversations go like this Friend/coworker/stranger: "How far long are you?" Me: "19 weeks. Almost half-way there!" Them: "WOW! You don't look pregnant at all." Thanks that makes me feel great. Would you like to see the ultrasound? On top of that I'm a little concerned I haven't gain enough weight so you making a point of saying I don't look pregnant doesn't help.
@LaceyBee522 yay team green! I have mentioned to a couple coworkers that our a/s is on Thursday and they immediately start getting excited and talking about the gender and asking if we're excited to start planning the nursery and then I tell them were not finding out and they're just like "oh that's fun" I think a lot of the older generation is a little jealous that we have the technology to find out and think if you can then why not.
@doxiemoxie212 it seems like it might also be more common in NYC to have an elective c-section. I am also hoping to avoid one at all costs. It just seems like it would eff up your abdominals forever.
DS: 6/1/18 (Pre-E; IUGR; seizures; NICU)
TTC #2: 12/2019
Sept 2020: HSG possible blocked right tube
Nov 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFN
Dec 2020: Letrozole + TI - BFP!!! EDD 9/18
So I completely missed this thread the last couple weeks.
How far along are you?? 20 weeks today (YAY!)
How are you feeling? Good. A/S was this morning and everything was normal. So I'm feeling GREAT. Things are starting to feel a bit heavy especially when I first stand up so I'm thinking I need to order a belly support band thing soon/ now.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy? In the beginning I was asked was it planned, or people just assumed it wasn't planned. We hadn't told any of our friends (except one for me) that we were ttgp, and in the past I'd said I wanted to start trying after 2 years of marriage (we'd only been married 13 months when we started trying and got pg right away). But I didn't like being asked that. It was also annoying to get that response from friends bc I felt like I was expected to tell them everything thing, when I don't and I'm not.
TTC: 08/2017 EDD: 6/11/2018 FTM
How far along are you??
19weeks today
How are you feeling?
Still getting over a cold. Again. Vaporizer, saline sprays, Vicks, Chapstick, breathe right strips, Benadryl, hot showers, sleep. Otherwise ok. Nothing exciting.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy?
I was also asked if baby was planned, which was a little weird and felt too personal. I know we surprised almost everyone because we have been married almost 10 years and I'm still finishing my degree... but to know me is to know I'm a planner and there is no mistake this baby is coming 3 weeks after my graduation date (fingers crossed baby stays put that long!)
I have friends who said they were annoyed when people asked how they or the baby were feeling and I don't feel annoyed about that at all. At least they care enough to ask.
How far along are you??
19+4
How are you feeling?
Better....but still getting sick. Not nearly as often. For example I threw up Friday and then not again until today. Other than that, I did join the park district gym and have been going and walking on the track for a few miles a few times per week, and I swam some laps last night. I was a collegiate swimmer back in the day, so swimming is actually an more relaxed exercise for me. It felt pretty good, I'm just so buoyant, lol.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy?
What's the name? We have chosen not to share the name. For some reason some people get so upset by this. I even have some co-workers begging. No, it's not going to be a secret between me, MH, and YOU. Geez.
I have also had an equal number of people tell me I look WAAAAAAAY too big for almost 20 weeks, and then others tell me I look too little. Thanks. I think my body knows what it's doing, I've gained about 6-7 pounds, and so far everything checks out with the babe.
https://datayze.com/labor-probability-calculator.php
18+4
I'm still suffering from morning sickness. Diclegis isn't working for me at all. I'm calling my doctor this morning and telling them I need Zofran or I'm going to go crazy. I'm lucky if I keep food down, and prenatals are a joke. I bought gummies because I figured they'd at least start to digest quicker, but they usually just come right back up anyway. *sigh*
We didn't announce until last night, so no real questions yet. The most I've gotten is whether I wanted a boy or girl, and people just don't want to accept the fact I didn't really care as long as he's healthy.
Me: 30 | DH: 34 | DSS: 14 | DS: 4
PG #2, EDD 10/12/2023
18+1 today
How are you feeling?
Good, although yesterday felt crappy due to a headache that kept coming back. Still dealing with congestion but it's not terrible. Oh and constipation.... ugh. I miss being "regular" lol
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy?
I haven't really been asked anything too annoying yet. I also got the "do you want a boy or a girl" and I always just say I don't care I just want to know (2 more weeks ahhhh). I get asked about names too which we don't plan to share either so I just say "we have a few ideas but we're not sure yet" which is true at this point.
DS born 9/24/2020
20+6
How are you feeling?
Fine. I have been feeling some more stretching pains lately, plus her little kicks. Also, I still fit into my regular clothes as of right now, so even though I really want that cute baby bump, I guess I'm happy that I get to wait a while longer before things get uncomfortable.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy?
Not much really. Same as the others about names but we're not 100%. I'm sure they will come though!
@ramblebee I feel the same way, I'd imagine our attitudes would change as it gets closer, we get bigger and pregnancy gets miserable. I read this pregnancy book that includes stories from all sorts of celebrities and even the fittest, prettiest, well taken care of super models report being absolutely miserable the last month of pregnancy.
TTC: 08/2017 EDD: 6/11/2018 FTM
@doxiemoxie212 Those are interesting stats - I didn't realize there's a less than 3% chance of giving birth on any given day. I'd think they'd be higher than that around the due date!
How far along are you??
20+4
How are you feeling?
Pretty good! I felt some definite movement last night that MH could feel too, so that was pretty cool and weird.
What are the most annoying questions you've been asked so far about your pregnancy?
I have a coworker that asks me how I'm feeling every day. It's getting so old. I figure she asks because it's an easy way to start the conversation, but I don't know what to tell her besides "fine". And I've been asked a couple times if the pregnancy was planned, which to me is just so personal!
Me: 32 | DH: 36
Married June 2005
1/2016 - TTC#1
4/2017 - Initial RE visit, Dx: Severe MFI (Varicocele, 14% motility, 3% progression, but normal count)
7/2017 - Stage 3 endometriosis discovered during laparoscopic removal of ovarian cyst
9/27/2017 - BFP at 10dpo (cycle 22), baby boy due June 9, 2018