PGAL Weekly Check In- 12/20

jsl82

Hi Ladies!  How is everyone feeling this week?  I know a few people have expressed anxiety around Christmas announcements- has anyone found a good anxiety reducer?  Besides the PGAL anxiety is everyone anxious for Christmas?  Any upcoming appointments this week? 

jsl82

So my office is closed next week- yay- but that means we are all stressed out this week trying to wrap everything up for the end of the year- start of next year.  I still have a million things to do for xmas and my husband works in retail- so is working until Christmas and basically no help to me. 

PGAL anxiety is pretty good right now- I had a horrible dream that I had a late miscarriage, but when to the doctor today for my 16 week appointment and heart the heartbeat.  I can also feel him- not so much his movements (though I'm pretty sure I'm starting to feel that) but just that there is something inside my body.  I gained 10 lbs since my last appointment.  To be far I had lost weight during the 1st trimester when I couldn't stomach to eat- so my body is probably hoarding calories and fat in case I stop eating again.  The doctor didn't say anything about it- but it has me worried for gestational diabetes.  I guess I'm gonna have to be really careful about not having too many sugary snacks during the holiday parties- which is hard since I want the wine sooo bad. 

bkrahn

Ugh @jsl82 those dreams are the worst  glad you were able to hear the heartbeat to ease some uneasy feelings! also regarding weight gain, I have the opposite problem.. I’ve lost weight since my last appt. I can’t seem to eat much these days due to hearatburn and reflux, so it’s discouraging. I guess this just gives me permission to load up on Christmas baking this weekend.

anxiety has been basically non-existent lately, thankfully. I find I’m finally starting to allow myself to look at nursery furniture and ideas and just be like “I’m having a baby!!” DH thinks I’m suddenly going nuts and keeps saying “we still have 5 months” and I’m just like “don’t steal my thunder!” It feels nice to finally feel excited! Also, On Friday we find out if this little one is a boy or girl and I cannot wait!!

jsl82

@bkrahn that sucks about the heartburn- I am eating tums like candy and spoke with my doctor about it today.  She said I can keep taking the prilosec if it works, I just have to remember to take it.  Also eat more frequent but smaller meals.  

As for the nursery- I remember with DD my MIL was upset that we were buying all the furniture and decor, but it was the one thing that made the pregnancy feel real for me.  I've been on pintrest like a mad woman since we found out it's a boy- nursery decorating it so fun- I just wish our budget was bigger.

profmcgonagall

It’s been a rough week here. 
Had some spotting start up on Monday and it’s still going on. Baby was checked and everything looks good and cervix is closed. But it just about caused me a mental breakdown. 
This is my second Christmas without my daughter and I’m just really missing her. We live overseas so we don’t have any family around to spend Christmas with. 

@bkrahn, that’s so exciting you will find out the sex tomorrow! 
I always feel so behind everyone since my DD is July 1. We are also waiting until the anatomy scan so it will be even longer 

catlady1215

@jsl82 ugh those dreams! glad you got the reassurance though!

@bkrahn eat all the baked goods! in my book, its def not to early to plan the nursery. I wish I could but the room we're using needs emptied. then needs some work done. and then carpet.. which means we'll do the rest of our steps and hallways at the same time. ugh. so I'm actually not looking forward to all that lol.

@profmcgonagall hope the spotting calms down. I can't imagine how anxious you must feel. But as long as everything looks good, that's the important part! hugs!

AFM, I felt some anxiety last week. and was really nervous for my apt this week. but then I had the elective ultrasound this weekend and he was fine. And she found the heartbeat yesterday with no issues. so now I'm good!
But today is actually a tough day... but at the same time, i feel so blessed. This day last year is when I went for my OB apt for my 9-10wk apt and my dr couldn't get that first heartbeat and her shitty ultrasound machine didn't show good results. I drove the whole way home hysterical. then had to wait till after Christmas to get, what I already knew, confirmed. and here we are, one year later on that same day with another special little boy in my belly again.

jsl82

@profmcgonagall I'm so sorry you are spotting- hopefully it has already stopped and everything continues to progress normally.  Also sorry about your Christmas being so rough- will you do anything to celebrate Christmas or just cancel it and have a nice day off?  I remember having my 2nd D&C on the 18th of December 2 years ago- and my doctor telling my DH that we shouldn't do Christmas that year and go away somewhere just the two of us instead.  I wish I had listened, but we had already promised to drive his cousin home and I didn't want to ruin her Christmas just because mine was ruined.  Hopefully you take the Holiday to do something for yourself- even if it's just vegging out in your pajamas all day watching crappy TV/Movies.  We can all use a day off from the outside world sometimes.  Sending creepy internet hugs.

@catlady1215 anniversaries are super hard- but I'm so glad you have the reassurance of finding the heartbeat and the elective u/s.  

lisa2589

@profmcgonagall I’m sorry that you are dealing with that. Spotting is never an easy thing to deal with. Hopefully you can take it easy for a few days.
@catlady1215 Those days are hard. The holidays were a really hard time for me last year because our first MC was diagnosed the day before thanksgiving. I remember several friends announcing on social media around Christmas and I was still so devastated. I cried all day. Hugs to you and I’m hoping you're finding more peace this year as well. 

AFM, I feel like now that our holiday cards are sent out so the rest of our family knows, my anxiety is near 0. I think we will wait a few more weeks for social media to find out. I’m feeling lots of baby flipping and rolling around, not so many little kicks but since I found out yesterday I have an anterior placenta I guess this makes sense. @jsl82 like you said with feeling something is in there- I bent over funny to pull on some boots and was like woops! There’s something there! 

@bkrahn I hope you enjoy your ultrasound! After my epic ultrasound fail yesterday I’m wishing we had somewhere nearby to go for an elective one, but I just can’t bite the bullet to drive an hour and a half for one. Good luck!

bkrahn

@catlady1215 oh girl, creepy internet hugs to you on this day!! Two weeks ago would’ve been our second baby’s due date, and I felt allll the anxiety leading up to it. Treated myself to a spa day the day of and tried to look at it like I was “treating my body for all that it IS doing & HAS done, rather than holding a grudge against it for what it couldn’t do.” It made me feel better holding that perspective, but I know it’s still so so hard passing these milestones. 

@profmcgonagall so sorry to hear youre experiencing spotting, that’s never an easy thing! Good vibes being sent your way this holiday! 

@lisa2589 ah, little baby rolls are the best feeling! I started feeling legitimate kicks a few days ago (last night I actually felt a few strong ones from the outside) and they make my heart SO happy! 

Edit: words 

torileea

@profmcgonagall I’m sorry your spotting. I hope it quits soon. Always scary 
@jsl82 I’m in a similar boat...
*previous loss mentioned*
I’d be lying if I said I wasnt scared hahah
we found out we were expecting, last year Christmas Eve so that has my Pgal brain rolling. And then we lost the baby in February.
*end*
I’m almost 13 weeks, so hoping I can feel this wiggly bean soon. Almost already for Christmas. I can’t wait to see my older 2’s faces Christmas morning, just started wrapping the presents today though hahah

katie121209

I forgot to check in last week but I'm still around. 16 weeks today. Had the one hour glucose test yesterday but have to wait for results. Tested myself at 90 minutes when I got home and I was a 120 which makes me thing I either failed or got pretty close:/ I can't imagine having GD for 24 weeks instead of 12 like last time. 

twelvetwosomeonenew

@ProfessorMcGonagall I hope all is well this week. ♡♡

And yesssss, the feeling of something being there -- even though I cannot feel any movement has done spectacular things for my anxiety. I actually FEEL PREGNANT. 

WeLiveInMaine

Howdy! I've been too anxious to keep up with PGAL but I'm feeling confident enough to jump in now.  15 weeks, feeling movement, but still get lots of anxiety when my midwives look for a heartbeat at appointments. (TW: all of my losses have been noticed with Doppler or ultrasound,  always a surprise.)

I hope everyone's holidays went well,  its a tough time of year for a lot of folks.  We actually told MIL at Christmas which I had really been putting off,  she's very emotional and overwhelms me.  I still am finding myself not wanting to tell anyone,  I'm excited but still having a hard time believing and connecting.  It's still really surreal. 

How do y'all deal with that?

I have two daughters,  I feel like I should really be more in touch.