@acunamatada i feel bad for going all hairy to my USs lol but ow well. To be honest i have been super low sex drive since DS was conceived two years ago. See we conceived them no sex allowed till 37 wks due to complications. We tried but was way too huge by then. After birth i got ppd. In the last 20 months we’ve only had sex maybe 4-5 times (two of those were to convince this pregnancy). I am wanting to wait till after I’m off progesterone and in second tri before we go for it. I am really surprised at how long DH can wait. Makes me feel like the worst wife ever.
Yeah my husband was on cymbalta for a while and completely lost his sex drive. It was about 2 years after coming off of it before he could even physically have sex. Tbh we have both had a really low drive since then... this was a FET baby, so we didn't even have sex the month it was implanted
I’m usually the one who does the obsessive cleaning and scrubbing, especially when I’m pregnant. But this time around I have been really really lazy. My husband finally wiped down the kitchen yesterday after I hadn’t done it in a couple weeks, and our bathroom hasn’t been cleaned since I got pregnant. I’m still doing the basics like laundry and dishes, but our bathtub is looking pretty gross and I’ll probably ask hubby to clean that too
@acunamatada@wildtot I don’t shave my legs ever! Lol. Or anything else for that matter, besides underarms! Since we conceived the baby we have had sex a few times but usually every time he brings it up, I pretend I want to and then just opt for making him feel good in a different way (if you catch my drift) so that I can get out of it lol... I feel bad but I don’t think he cares. I’m just too tired and that’s the last thing on my mind.
@wildtot yeah the only time we have regular sex is when we're TTC, and even then that's only when I'm ovulating . Pregnant sex gets too weird for him once he can feel the baby moving, and first tri sex is too draining so we're pretty much doomed. You're soo not a bad wife, babies screw up our hormones so bad, and really, sex isn't everything.
@emsnedds I have 4 baskets of clean, folded laundry sitting in our room that hasn't moved in weeks. I just don't have the energy or motivation to put it away on top of the rest of the house to clean so we're just living like this
@acunamatada girl at least they are folded lol i have that one chair stacked with clean unfolded clothes until we have guests then it gets put away and of course i have to fold it because i don’t like how DH does it but he at least tries.
@wildtot we've been living out of the baskets so long really only the bottom untouched half is still folded . I have to fold them as soon as they get out of the drier, I can't stand wrinkles lol
DH and DD are going away for the weekend I have to stay home to work. once i know they are there safe and sound I am not sure I will miss them much and just enjoy a weekend to myself
@wildtot my leg hair is light, so I get away with it longer than I should
@acunamatada laundry is for the devil. DH has asked me not to do the laundry if I can't finish it and fold it at the same time. Usually it sits in baskets for a few days. lol
@emsneddsWe're so terrible with deep cleaning. I usually have the living room and kitchen clean and I make the bed. But dusting, baseboards, bathrooms, and cleaning the large amount of dog hair never gets done. I was typically lazy, but pregnancy is NOT helping. You're not alone!
Yes @emsnedds this is me too!! My husband isn't a slob but usually I do the deeper cleaning!! The other day my hubby cleaned the toilet because it hadn't been done since I got pregnant! I'll go home thinking I'm going to do it& end up taking a nap instead!
Sometimes when I'm in a long boring meeting or on a crowded train commuting home I play this game in my head called "who here would I most like to see naked."
@gspmom21 I'm sooooooooo the same way with deep cleaning. We have a Roomba and a mopping robot. That's how lazy I am. And when we have $ to spare we have someone coming to clean.
A related confession is that I wish I could put cleaning services on my baby registry! That's truly how undomestic I am.
@kissableviv my robot vacuum is my second husband! I couldn't survive without it and all of our pets! I like the idea of a housekeeper but I couldn't justify the price plus I'm weird about strangers touching my stuff, especially my dirty house lol.
We have a roomba and i love, love love it. It actually picked up so much crap after I vacuumed with my regular vacuum. I thought I was actually doing a good job until I saw how much stuff it was picking up
ETA - I got the mopping robot for my downstairs (all tile) for christmas... I can't wait to test it out
@beanship@Crystal321@acunamatada@gspmom21 the mopping robot is the same brand as the Roomba. It is small, so if you have a big home it may not be worth it but I still think it's great even just for the kitchen which is where we spend a lot of time and the floor is always gross! I grew up with my mom always having someone over to clean the home, I know as a working mom she saved a lot just to have that because she just never had the time, hence why I'm not really weirded out. I work from home so I'm always supervising when they come in
I have had my house cleaned every Thursday for about 15 months now because... I just can’t / don’t anymore. I have soooo many other things I would rather spend my time doing.
ETF words.
Lab Mom (x2): Sept/Oct 2014 Married: August 2015 DS: Nov 2016 (36w) Baby H #2: July2018 (Team Pink!)
Thank you ladies for not making me feel alone! I say we let our husbands do a little more cleaning and we do a little more relaxing
One more confession. My daughter is 20 months old, and I made the mistake of always rocking her to sleep. Naps, bedtime, you name it. I would rock her to sleep and then lay her down in her crib. Well now that we’re pregnant again, I am trying to teach her to sleep on her own. She did so well at transitioning at night for bedtime, but now she refuses to take naps. I’ve never really liked the “cry it out” method, but I’ve run out of other options at this point. She crawls into my lap to take a nap and I put her in her crib and she just screams until I go get her. So she’s in her room right now, crying it out, as we speak. If she doesn’t start falling asleep on her own, then I guess she’s just not going to take naps anymore
Thank you ladies for not making me feel alone! I say we let our husbands do a little more cleaning and we do a little more relaxing
One more confession. My daughter is 20 months old, and I made the mistake of always rocking her to sleep. Naps, bedtime, you name it. I would rock her to sleep and then lay her down in her crib. Well now that we’re pregnant again, I am trying to teach her to sleep on her own. She did so well at transitioning at night for bedtime, but now she refuses to take naps. I’ve never really liked the “cry it out” method, but I’ve run out of other options at this point. She crawls into my lap to take a nap and I put her in her crib and she just screams until I go get her. So she’s in her room right now, crying it out, as we speak. If she doesn’t start falling asleep on her own, then I guess she’s just not going to take naps anymore
All my kids stopped taking naps at two.
Mom of 3 (Ginny 4 yrs old), (Miles 2 yrs old), and (Mason due June 15th)
Sometimes when I'm in a long boring meeting or on a crowded train commuting home I play this game in my head called "who here would I most like to see naked."
I swear I'm not a weirdo or pervent
I am so stealing this
Meagan Married 6.12.10 DS 11.8.12 Baby GIRL! due 7.4.18
@thediarywithin please don’t tell me that’s normal?! I can’t imagine a day without a nap. @emsnedds DS usually cry’s a bit at almost every nap even though he typically doesn’t for bedtime. I rock but not to sleep just to whine down. We did the Ferber Method and i still hate letting him cry but he needs to learn. He will start to catch on and if i break the habit just once we start all over for a few days. I hope it gets better!
@emsnedds I'm not against CIO, I did it with DS when he was younger, but getting close to 2 I feel like CIO does more harm than good. Your daughter could be phasing out of a nap. Would she possibly sleep in your bed, where you could lay with her until she goes down? I had to do that for a while with DS after I started transitioning him to a big boy bed. That did set us up for a different set of problems down the line, but I'm about the path of least resistance
@acunamatada yes, I’ve tried putting her in our bed for the same reason: I just want her to find some kind of solution even if it’s a different bad habit I’m creating, but it’s the same thing. She starts to fall asleep but as soon as I move or I’m not holding her anymore, she just wakes up and cries and cries and cries. And she is so tired. I think that’s why she doesn’t fight me on it during bed time, but she is just so cranky and upset without a nap. And like you said, if I keep holding her or laying with her then I may just be setting myself up for another fight in the future. Which will be more difficult when we have another baby.
Bless all of you! I feel so much better about my mountain of laundry! I’m generally a lazy person but it has gotten so much worse! I just never feel like doing housework. Especially when I could be sitting down and munching on pizza!
So many good confessions today @runsomewhere after you pick whoever you’d like to see naked do you do your kegal magic in the conference room?? Lol
DH and I have sex a lot. We have about and hour in between when we put my son on the bus and when my daughter wakes up/husband has to leave so we try to take advantage of that most mornings.
@emsnedds how frustrating, I used to have to lay with DS until he was DEAD asleep otherwise he'd erupt and it would all be for nothing. Now I leave when he's about 80% asleep (he's in a twin bed now so it's easier). My goal before #2 is to be able to leave him and have him fall asleep on his own again because I can't do this forever!
@emsnedds my daughter stopped napping around 20 months for the same reason. She was eventually able to climb out of the crib so CIO was no longer an option. No naps since then at all, but she sleeps well at night
I just ate almost an entire big bag of salt n vinegar chips and almost a full jar of pickles... I regret nothing.
@wildtot Not having nap time SUCKS. DS just went there these last couple weeks (just turned 2 in October). I'm only surviving because he has a very long attention span and lots of hotwheels.
On the subject of cleaning robots, DS dumped half a bottle of dish soap on the kitchen floor while I was in the bathroom. I turned the mopping robot on and walked away. We will see if the little guy is up for this challenge.
While I hate that people have to go through a miscarriage I am so glad this a supportive community where people feel they can share openly and recieve support and love. I was lurking WTE and there were several threads of people complaining about loss posts blaming them for their anxiety and basically saying they should not post them for their own sake! Ugh that level of selfishness makes me so angry. so thank you for being a loving and supporting community! To our loss and struggling mamas you are important, you are loved and you should know you are always free to come abd update us and share if you want to and wish!
Yes @emsnedds this is me too!! My husband isn't a slob but usually I do the deeper cleaning!! The other day my hubby cleaned the toilet because it hadn't been done since I got pregnant! I'll go home thinking I'm going to do it& end up taking a nap instead!
This is so me. My internal list making on the drive home from work is always so ambitious. Then I get home and I’m lucky if I do one thing off it!
Though I will say I’m going to have to step it up. Our house is a disaster and it’s starting to get to me. DH is good at helping if I’m up and doing something. But if I’m laying down, there’s a 100% chance he will be sitting on the couch.
Re: FFFC
His low sex drive and my low energy are a giant libido suck
@wildtot my leg hair is light, so I get away with it longer than I should
@acunamatada laundry is for the devil. DH has asked me not to do the laundry if I can't finish it and fold it at the same time. Usually it sits in baskets for a few days. lol
@emsneddsWe're so terrible with deep cleaning. I usually have the living room and kitchen clean and I make the bed. But dusting, baseboards, bathrooms, and cleaning the large amount of dog hair never gets done. I was typically lazy, but pregnancy is NOT helping. You're not alone!
I swear I'm not a weirdo or pervent
A related confession is that I wish I could put cleaning services on my baby registry! That's truly how undomestic I am.
@kissableviv we have a Roomba too, it's a lifesaver! We definitely need to look into a mopping robot, that NEVER gets done.
ETA - I got the mopping robot for my downstairs (all tile) for christmas... I can't wait to test it out
I grew up with my mom always having someone over to clean the home, I know as a working mom she saved a lot just to have that because she just never had the time, hence why I'm not really weirded out. I work from home so I'm always supervising when they come in
ETF words.
Lab Mom (x2): Sept/Oct 2014
Married: August 2015
DS: Nov 2016 (36w)
Baby H #2: July2018 (Team Pink!)
One more confession. My daughter is 20 months old, and I made the mistake of always rocking her to sleep. Naps, bedtime, you name it. I would rock her to sleep and then lay her down in her crib. Well now that we’re pregnant again, I am trying to teach her to sleep on her own. She did so well at transitioning at night for bedtime, but now she refuses to take naps. I’ve never really liked the “cry it out” method, but I’ve run out of other options at this point. She crawls into my lap to take a nap and I put her in her crib and she just screams until I go get her. So she’s in her room right now, crying it out, as we speak. If she doesn’t start falling asleep on her own, then I guess she’s just not going to take naps anymore
DS 11.8.12
Baby GIRL! due 7.4.18
@emsnedds DS usually cry’s a bit at almost every nap even though he typically doesn’t for bedtime. I rock but not to sleep just to whine down. We did the Ferber Method and i still hate letting him cry but he needs to learn. He will start to catch on and if i break the habit just once we start all over for a few days. I hope it gets better!
Would she possibly sleep in your bed, where you could lay with her until she goes down? I had to do that for a while with DS after I started transitioning him to a big boy bed. That did set us up for a different set of problems down the line, but I'm about the path of least resistance
DH and I have sex a lot. We have about and hour in between when we put my son on the bus and when my daughter wakes up/husband has to leave so we try to take advantage of that most mornings.
@wildtot Not having nap time SUCKS. DS just went there these last couple weeks (just turned 2 in October). I'm only surviving because he has a very long attention span and lots of hotwheels.
My roomba is my bestie.
Also, get it girl!
Though I will say I’m going to have to step it up. Our house is a disaster and it’s starting to get to me. DH is good at helping if I’m up and doing something. But if I’m laying down, there’s a 100% chance he will be sitting on the couch.