PGAL Check In ((13 December))

mdfarmchick

Sorry this is late!

This is a safe space for those who are pregnant after a loss. General TW for this thread.

How far along are you?

Any appointments coming up?

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)

GTKY: How are you celebrating the holidays?


Also, PSA, some of us have moved to the Facebook group and would love for you to join us on the check in there. Feel free to discuss here and hopefully we will see you on Facebook soon. 

mdfarmchick

How far along are you?
29 weeks tomorrow 

Any appointments coming up?
My next appointment is 28 December and then I go to appointments every 2 weeks. 

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
I'm trying to do better about my lack of motivation and making good and healthy choices. I’ve been using the yoga ball and doing yoga and stretches as much as possible since the weekend. I also realized I need some time for myself too, so I’ve been trying to rest or get a warm bath most nights while MH bathes DS. I’ve also started back up with my bullet journal as a little mental check in. It is so easy to get caught up in taking care of everything and everyone else and to forget to take care of me. 

GTKY: How are you celebrating the holidays?
MH and I decided after DS’s first Christmas that we would spend the holidays at home. We do the candlelight service together every Christmas Eve and just have a family Christmas at our house. Honestly as much as I miss my family at Christmas, it is so much less stressful to not have to travel at the holidays with a toddler. I’m really looking forward to our last Christmas as just the three of us this year. 

senora76

How far along are you? 24+5

Any appointments coming up? Monday

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) Spain did me a lot of good... my MIL just booked a ticket from Spain - she will be staying with us 3/26-4/16. I would feel super weird about that if we didn't go through what we did with Mars, but I'm glad she will be here to meet her grandchild. I am nervous we have plans in place before Nova arrives... but trying to stay hopeful.  

GTKY: How are you celebrating the holidays? Laying low... heavy time of year for us... will do my traditional Christmas on 12/24 with my older sons... but for the most part, I have no expectations will feel joy when I can...looking forward to the new year.

@mdfarmchick thanks for the heads up about FB - is that where everyone has gone???  shoot... I'm still not ready to return to social media...maybe at some point...need some more time but will find you ladies to connect if the time is right.

ashtuesday

How far along are you? 28 weeks today - so excited to be starting the third trimester!

Any appointments coming up? A routine ob/gyn visit next Tuesday.

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)  I've been doing pretty well!  I'm pumped on hitting the third trimester.  I also hit the back-pain-and-discomfort-no-matter-what-I-do stage recently, so I just started doing the Spinning Babies activities: yesterday was my first go at it, and surprisingly, I felt noticeably more comfortable in bed last night!  Might be psychosomatic, but I'm going to keep at it anyway.

GTKY: How are you celebrating the holidays?  There are two and a half hours between our families, so my husband and I usually have a crazy holiday time: this year will be the worst yet.  On the 22nd, we're driving down to his family because my baby shower with that side is on the 23rd.  On the 24th, we're driving out to my family, who is hyper Italian, so missing Christmas Eve with them is unacceptable.  We'll open presents and have breakfast with my family on Christmas morning, and then it's back to his family for Christmas day and dinner.  As painful as all that driving will be, we are very happy because we know it's our last year doing all this: next year, we start hosting Christmas!  We're considering baby our ticket out of all the traveling we do to see our families (which no one ever reciprocates).

justkeeptrying

Thanks for starting this @mdfarmchick. My apologies ladies. I'm having a hard time finding time to come on the bump lately with my toddler and the busyness of Christmas! Please forgive me! I've felt such guilt about this.

How far along are you? 25+3

Any appointments coming up? Not until Jan. 2

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here): I'm doing really well. Now that I can feel movement more consistently (morning, early afternoon, and bedtime for sure), I feel like my PGAL brain has relaxed significantly. It's obviously still a thing that crosses my mind, but not like it was in first and early second trimester.

GTKY: How are you celebrating the holidays? 24th with my in laws and then we get 2 glorious days of just me, DH, and DS relaxing at home. We might go to my parents for supper on the 25th though. And then we are hosting my extended family on the 27th

@senora76, yes a bunch of us have gone over to facebook world. But we are definitely missing some of the familiar faces over there and would love more members. I hope that you are one of them but I understand the difficulty in getting back into social media.

@ashtuesday, are there specific spinning babies exercises that you're doing? Or are you doing them all? I've tried looking at this and I just feel so overwhelmed. But I know that I should be doing them. DS was in a horrible position during labour and delivery, and my doula is really encouraging me to use spinning babies to make this delivery much smoother.

ashtuesday

@justkeeptrying - I've been doing the daily essentials video, which is about 30 minutes of super gentle stretching. I tried to go through what was actually written out on the site, but I found that to be overwhelming myself. After Christmas, I'm going to add in the prenatal yoga sequence video.  You can get those two videos plus a daily motion video (which is basically how to do normal things comfortably while pregnant) for like $16 on Vimeo.

justkeeptrying

@ashtuesday, thanks! I'll have to check those out! I hadn't seen a video when I went on last time, but I need to peruse the site some more.

chasingroygbiv

How far along are you?

30+3

Any appointments coming up?

Tomorrow! 

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
As of like yesterday it hit me just how quickly February will be here. I’m starting to feel the fullness, aches, discomfort and exhaustion of third tri. I’m overwhelmed that we have nothing— NOTHING ready, not even a thing started. I keep saying maybe if I get her name on something and her bedding picked out that’ll kick me into high gear. If she came at 37 weeks that’s only 6 weeks and some change away. Whoa. Whoaaaaa. I also feel like I may be getting a cold, ughhh. Tis the season.... 

GTKY: How are you celebrating the holidays?
Mostly at home aside from presents at MIL’s House whenever she tells us what works with her work schedule. Our holidays are pretty relaxed ever since we kind of stopped going to things due to crazy family drama we didn’t want to be a part of. I feel bad for the kids, but honestly, it’s not worth the stress of dealing with such insanity. We have fun family traditions Eve and Day that we all look forward to! 

mdfarmchick

@senora76 I completely understand but hope you will be able to join us eventually. I plan on checking both for a while. 

@justkeeptrying I do the activities listed on the daily part of the site. It’s easy for me to just knock out different stretches at different times throughout the day. I noticed a difference just from my first day too @ashtuesday. 

@chasingroygbiv you still have plenty of time! And remember, babies don’t need much so I’m sure you’ll be fine. 

bb3vj3n

How far along are you?

27+1

Any appointments coming up?
Saw my OB Monday... had an ultrasound today and my second glucose test this Saturday... then nothing unto Jan 2

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)

its official - I'm being scheduled for a C- Section. My placenta has not nicer at all since 20 weeks and unless it move atleast 2-3 for centimeters before 38 weeks (unlikely) they are not going to let me have this baby on my own. 

GTKY: How are you celebrating the holidays? family family family 

mdfarmchick

@bb3vj3n well at least you know and it won’t be a surprise? 

BrittnieMariee

How far along are you?
29+1 today!

Any appointments coming up?
I had one on the 12th, I got my flu and TDAP shots, and had blood taken. Apparently I’m anemic again (ugh). And I have an appointment next week for an ultrasound! 

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
I’m feeling pretty good. Emma moves around so much when she’s awake so I always try to sit down and enjoy it when it happens. We went earlier this week and ordered her nursery furniture and it’s already arrived at the store. So we’re hopefully going to pick it up this weekend. Then I can actually get started decorating her room 

GTKY: How are you celebrating the holidays?
We plan on taking it kind of easy this year. For the past few years we’ve had several different Christmases to attend but now that we have our own house we plan on hosting all the grandparents! We did that with Thanksgiving this year and it was so much less stress for me and for DS!

@mdfarmchick how do we go about joining the fb group?? I’m on there way more often than I am here lol mostly because the app is terrible!

senora76

@bb3vj3n I've been teetering the c-section line myself... first with the placenta previa (which moved up but is still low lying and "transverse") and now my baby went from head down at the level II ultrasound to feet first breech.  I am scared to get a c-section, but more scared of losing Nova so I'll do whatever they suggest... If we had never lost Mars I know I'd be one of the moms doing everything in my power to avoid a c-section... including going for a vag birth with a breech... but I don't want to go a road with ANY risks...in fact I am debating on not doing the external version if it comes to that because of the risks involved.  Is this your first c-section? How close is your placenta to your cervix?  I need to ask the MFM when I see him again in 6 weeks how far mine is... curious what the protocols are. I know mine is very close.

To those moms who have had c-sections, when can you hold your baby skin to skin?  I get even with vaginal births there could be complications that do not allow immediate contact, like when I had Vance 5 weeks early they whisked him away so fast I didn't even get to see what he looked like. I know this is a small detail when all I really want is a healthy baby... but I am curious what its really like to go through a c-section.

mdfarmchick

@BrittnieMariee just check out the Facebook post on here and PM one of the mods @becausescience @heatherdubrow @bettyvonsomethingstein

@senora76 I haven’t had a C section, so I can’t help you there but remember that a c section is also a risk. I’d compare the risks between the the options and pick the one with the least amount of risk. Also, I know you mainly stick here, but you might get more experience if you post this in the questions thread? Just a suggestion for both. Nova has plenty of time to turn still!

ashtuesday

@senora76 - I'm a FTM, but at the orientation at my hospital, they said they will make every effort to start skin-to-skin immediately, even following a C-section. So it might vary based on where you're delivering?

chasingroygbiv

I had my u/s today to check baby’s growth and bones and they saw hair!  DS only had peach fuzz, but DD had a head FULL! Wondering how much this baby will have. Also discovered why I’m feeling such a weird sensation down low, baby is laying so strange. Head down, but chest/bum to one side and legs up in my ribs on the other side. 

senora76

@mdfarmchick Thanks for the tip - I have such social anxiety since losing Mars, I don't even feel comforable posting in any other place but this PGAL board!  I'm in a lot of therapy for this right now... and its really a shame because I really loved the person I was before I lost him. I was a social butterfly, team soccer mom, involved at the kids schools, etc... I know there isn't a huge population here but I take comfort that you'll be gentle with me

@chasingroygbiv that's amazing!!!  My first two boys had so much hair also!  Mars had less, but what he had was unquestionably red We have our ultrasound boutique re-do scheduled tomorrow since Nova has not been cooperative... Hope we get as good of a look as you got...!

mdfarmchick

@senora76, do you want me to ask some of your questions and let you know what they say? I wish I could be more of a help but I have no experience with c sections. I can also ask in my BMB from DS if that would help. I know a bunch of the ladies there had to have c sections.

BrittnieMariee

@senora76 I had a cesarean with my first. I was actually put under which changed the whole scenario. DH wasn’t allowed in the room and I had to be in recovery for an hour, so DS was about 2 hours old before I even got to see or hear him. They had already fed him formula, even though they knew I wanted to breastfeed. My experience was not great. I actually stopped breathing on the table and only found out because DH told me about it later on. I know other people have way better experiences. But most of this is why I’m hoping to have a VBAC this time, but if my doctor does recommend a RCS then I will listen to their advice. So far everyone is being supportive. 

bb3vj3n

@senora76 currently my placenta is only 0.1 or 0.2 mm from my cervix and they said an absolute 2cm clearance is the inky way they would consider allowing me to have Lily vaginally. I go back for one more internal ultrasound for exact measurements at around 35-36 weeks.  it could still clear... but they are not optimistic.  To add to it, she is also breech and has been since day 1. now this actually could still change... but it just add to their conclusion to do a Csec for now. 

MY OB insists this is the safest way to proceed given the current circumstances.  He says we can always cancel if my placenta clears later on

senora76

@mdfarmchick thanks- i just mainly wanted to hear about the skin to skin contact- but I will talk to my dr on Monday... I know every hospital and every dr and every birth is different... I’m really hoping i dont need one!  

@BrittnieMariee Thank you for sharing your scary story!  That is exactly what Im scared of, but I’m glad you are okay! 
I hope you get your VBAC!

Happy Friday everyone

BrittnieMariee

@senora76 it was fairly traumatic. I honestly don’t even remember most of our stay in the hospital. It’s just a blur. However, I am lucky that DS was perfectly healthy and we were able to go home after 2 days. Most people I know that had a cesarean had MUCH better experiences with no complications. If I do end up with a RCS then I hope it’s much easier on me! Thank you! I’m reallyyy hoping my VBAC pans out lol

leilaquinn

How far along are you?

28 weeks 6 days

Any appointments coming up?

I have been in the hospital since yesterday at 1, came in due to very high at Home blood pressure readings and vision disturbances.

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)

It’s been a rough couple of days, in the hospital, maybe preeclampsia or just very out of control gestational hypertension, I had some protein in my urine but not quite a conclusive amount. I am hoping I get to go home tonight, but yesterday they were talking about delivery this week which was really scary. I did get steroid shots to get his lungs a bit more ready if things go south again, but for the moment my blood pressure is fairly controlled on a whole lot of drugs.

GTKY: How are you celebrating the holidays?

as quietly and calmly as possible, with loooooooow blood pressure numbers! My husband is the youngest of 5 and the only boy. He and his oldest sister do not at all get along, when their dad died they agreed to be civil at holidays for their mom, but I don’t handle conflict well and the tension is so unpleasant for me. We will go there for Christmas Eve dinner and Christmas morning, but I have to be selfish this year and say it’s time to go when I need to. Then we will go to my mom’s which should be relaxing and not as likely to turn into a real housewives of New Jersey table flipping episode. (That has not happened at my husband’s family dinners that I know of, but there has been yelling that included Italian curse words I don’t understand !)

senora76

@BrittnieMariee All births are different ao I have faith you can have your VBAC or at the very least a gentle c/s. I had a traumatic vag birth with my second plus he was preterm, and had all sorts of issues... the epidural administered by a student didnt work, I had cholestasis and was at a teaching hospital so delivered screaming and crying (me not the baby) in a room with about 25 students taking notes- i thought i could nurse him
right away like my oldest so i had my boob ready and reached out to hold him and he was blue with bubbles in his mouth and they ran away with him... and i was left alone as everyone ran off with the baby- my ex-DH called me a few min later saying something about formula and i was like i want to nurse him- dont give him a bottle- he said - im not asking you I’m telling you hes in shock, getting formula and its not thru a bottle he has a tube down his throat... I was expecting a calm birth just like my first but it was totally different... I had to leave the hospital without him - he had a rough start but all things considered - it doesnt even matter now- healthy baby is all that matters... I am happy to say my birth with Mars was absolutely beautiful- hardest and longest but proof that all babies write their own stories

@leilaquinn omg how scary... I am glad you are getting the steroids- I hope your health holds out for several more weeks so you can keep baking that baby!!! 

ashtuesday

@leilaquinn - I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through!  I hope you're out of the hospital and feeling good soon.

BrittnieMariee

@senora76 that is so true that each birth is a totally different experience!! I hope we all have good birth experiences this go around. I didn’t get to breastfeed DS for a while and we didn’t even make it very long. Hoping things go way better with Emma! I definitely learned a lot from DS! He had the most beautiful latch too 

@leilaquinn so sorry to hear you’ve had such a scare!! I saw your comments on another thread. Hope everything continues to improve!!

senora76

@BrittnieMariee worth noting- Although Vance had a rough start, had formula tube fed, followed by having to learn how to eat on a bottle before breast, he had a very successful breastfeeding rub - I never had to give him formula and he nursed until he was 3!  years old!  His traumatic birth was harder on me than it was on him.

BrittnieMariee

@senora76 that is so reassuring!! With my son we got sent back to the hospital when he was 6 days old due to jaundice. When we arrived the doctors told me I had to stop bfing and pump. I think that was the beginning of the end for us. I had no idea what my rights were as a parent and I was so clueless about bfing anyway since no one in my family had done it before. I’ve learned so much since then!!

senora76

@BrittnieMariee yep- its all pretty much live and learn with this parenting thing haha... 

BrittnieMariee

@senora76 you are completely right there!! Poor first borns lol

mintea

How far along are you? 25+1

Any appointments coming up? Jan 2

How are you doing? Pretty bleh. PGAL stress is a lot better but I am having a really, really hard time finding the motivation to stay on top of my GD. I am also starting a new job soon that I am theoretically super excited about but just feel so wiped out and pregnant that I am really stressed I won't make a good impression.

GTKY: How are you celebrating the holidays? My parents' house for the weekend