Hello all! I went on vacation last week and brought "What Alice Forgot" by one of my favorite authors, Liane Moriarty. Going into it, I had no idea it even touched on IF. After reading it, it has definitely made me think about things a little differently. While I've just recently started my IF journey, I honestly don't know how far I'll go. But, I do know that I'm not going to stress about it like I have been! I think it's a great read and can apply to anyone, even those not dealing with IF.
Curious if anyone else out here has read it and what you thought!
I read it earlier this year (it's was the summer of Lianne Moriarty) and I too was pleasantly surprised with the IF story line. I think she did a really nice job with the topic. A few months later I was in a small book store and bought another Moriarty book. The store owner asked if I read What Alice Forgot and I told her about how I connected with that part of the story and she shared that she too suffered from IF.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
I read it and I loved it! I usually do not like how woman who are ttc are portrayed in movies and tv, and I found this character to be so much better than what I usually see.
I hadn't read it, but I went ahead and read it yesterday morning after seeing this post.
There were definitely one or two sentences about IF that seemed a little off - at one point she said something about 7 failed IVF cycles, and then at another point she talked about there being 7 embryos - and I thought: "I need more specifics. How many embryos did she get per retrieval cycle?" But a regular reader (without as much IVF exposure) might not have even noticed.
I thought she dealt with the emotional side of it really well, and I actually wept through some of her descriptions. All of the bits about the woman suffering through IF being like a zombie walking really resonated with me - like not wanting to listen to music, not wanting to feel anything, wanting to be distracted to take your mind off of anything other than the pain of it.
Anyway, I really liked it! Thank you for the recommendation!
I just read it on the flight back last night and definitely the best written IF storyline I've read. To be honest if I hadn't seen your recommendations before @jenrn1216@laurad75@morganelizabeth123 I probably would have stopped the book when I came to the storyline - but I'm really glad I read it. Also had me in tears in parts (on the plane, but who cares!) but left me feeling good in the end. @funkykey I was also hoping for a few more details on protocols and number of enmbies per cycle, but eventually made peace that it's a mainstream book and not this forum lol
I had the idea to maybe gift it to my mother and sister for Xmas... as a soft way into the IF/IVF topic if I ever need one...
Me 43 DH 45 Married 12/2016 TTC #1 since 04/2015 AMA, DOR (AMH 0.65, AFC 2-4) and autoimmune issues (RA, APS), low TSH, adenomyosis 7 retrievals, 3 transfers
Jun19 FET BFP, due date 7th March 2020, DD born Feb20
Sep17 IVF1 - 1ER, 1F, 1ET, BFN Nov17 IVF2 - 1ER, 0F Jan18 IVF3 - 3ER, 1F, 1ET, BFN Feb18 - second opinion and additional testing Apr18 IVF4 - cancelled (E2 too high) May/Jun18 IVF4 - 4ER, 0M, 1F, 1 frozen day 3 (not best quality) Jun/Jul18 IVF5 - 5 ER, 3M, 2F, 2 frozen day 3 (not best quality) Jul/Aug18 IVF6 - 4ER, 3M, 2F, 2 frozen day 3 (good quality) Aug/Sep18 IVF7 - cancelled (cyst) Sep/Oct18 IVF7 - 3ER, 3M, 2F, 2 frozen Day 3 (excellent quality) Oct18 IVF8 - Cancelled (cyst and too low TSH) Oct18-Jan19 bringing TSH under control Feb19 ERA and hysteroscopy Mar19 Investigation for fibroid and adenomyosis Apr19 adenomyosis confirmed, polyps removed Jun19 FET after 2 months Lupron, autoimmune protocol, transferred two day 3 frozen embryos
Sep17 - Pergoveris 10-17 Sep, Orgalutran 15-18 Sep, Ovitrelle 18 Sep, ER 20 Sep for 2 follies, 1 mature egg, fertilized, ET 1x 2d 4-cell embryo 22/09, 05/10 BFN Nov17 IVF2 - Pergoveris 2-14 Nov, Orgalutran 5-14 Nov, Ovitrelle 15 Nov, ER 17 Nov for 3 follies, 1 mature egg, did not fertilize Jan18 IVF3 - Pergoveris 30 Dec - 8 Jan, Orgalutran 5-8 Jan, Ovitrelle 9 Jan, ER 11 Jan 3 eggs, 2 mature, 1 fertilized, ET 1x 4d 12-cell embryo 15/01, 24/01 BFN May/Jun18 IVF4 - Rekovelle 25-29 May, Menogon 30May - 2Jun, Zomacton 25 27 29 31 May and 2Jun, Cetrotide 30May - 3Jun, Gonasi 3Jun, ER 5Jun 4 eggs, none mature, two matured overnight, 1 fertilized with ICSI, Frozen day 3 but not good quality Jun/Jul18 IVF5 - Rekovelle 21-24 June, Menogon 25Jun-3Jul, Puregon 4-5Jul, Zomacton 21 23 25 27 29 Jun, Cetrotide 25Jun-5Jul, Gonasi 6Jul, ER 8Jul 5 eggs, 3 mature, 2 fertilized with ICSI, 2 frozen day 3 but not good quality Jul/Aug18 IVF6 - Rekovelle 26-29 Jul, Menogon 30Jul-7Aug, Buserelin 26Jul-7Aug, Zomacton 26 28 30 Jul 1 3 Aug, Gonasi 7Aug, ER 9Aug 4 eggs, 3 mature, 2 fertilized (normal IVF), 2 frozen day 3 good quality Sep/Oct18 IVF7 - Menogon 19-30Sep, Buserelin 19-30Sep, Zomacton 19 21 23 25 27 Sep, Ovitrelle 1 Oct, ER 3 eggs, 3 mature, 2 fertilized with ICSI, 2 frozen day 3 excellent quality
Fav Quote: The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return
I'm now reading Little Fires Everywhere and wouldn't you know it halfway through the book and an IF storyline shows up that I didn't see coming. Ugh. We really can't escape it.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
Read it after seeing this thread - thank you for the recommendation!! I like how it gives a perspective from both ways - those struggling with IF, and those who don’t, and don’t know how to help and how to talk about their own babies.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My story in signature spoiler. Children mentioned.
Me: 37 DH: 45 I don't produce FSH, so no natural menstrual cycle. DH has reduced morphology. Summer 2014 IUI (with first husband): cancelled after almost a month of stims due to too many follicles Time off to divorce, get back on my feet, find a new hubby and get married again 💑 March 2017 IVF#1: ~70 follicles, 13R, 10M, 7F, 3B = 2 PGS Normal (both XY) - no transfer due to ohss Sept 2017 FET#1: BFP, Beta#1 (10dpt) - 253, Beta#2 (12dpt) - 528, DS born 05/31/2018 👨👩👦 Dec 2019 FET#2: BFN Changed clinic, planning March 2020 IVF#2 - postponed due to the pandemic April 2020 IVF #2: ~30 follicles, 24R, 12M, 8F, 4B = 2XY & 2XX, all normal Sept 2020 FET#3: one XX embryo, BFP, Beta#1 (9dpt) - 161, Beta#2 (11dpt) - 519, Beta#3 (19dpt) - 7174, Due date 05/30/2021 DD born 05/23/2021 👨👩👧👦 - My family is now complete
Thanks for the recommendation! I also put it on reserve at the library.
@laurad75 Yeah, that absolutely ruined Little Fires Everywhere for me. I just couldn't deal with it.
I would love to hear if there are other popular novels to stay away from because of their poor/inaccurate treatment of IF or loss... I remember hating a couple novels I read this summer because of how inaccurate and hurtful their infertility plotlines were, namely Wreckage by Emily Bleecker and Mothers & Other Strangers by Gina Sorell.
@adirat I'm almost done with Little Fires and enjoying the book otherwise so I'm going to press on and finish it but I'm looking forward to moving on. I have The Woman in Cabin 10 on deck so I might read that next.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
Re: What Alice Forgot
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
Married 6/18/16 (Me 42, DH 44), TTC #2
***TW***
As of 12/2016: AMH 1.42, FSH 6.1, AFC ~10
Self-benched Nov-Dec 2016 for
IVF #1 Jan-Feb 2017 (OCP, testosterone primed antagonist w/HGH - ER 2/2/17 - 12R, 7M ICSI'd, 3F, 0B)
IVF #2 Mar-Apr 2017 (testosterone primed agonist/luteal lupron w/HGH - ER 4/8/17 - 10R, 8M, 8F, 5B, 1 PGS normal)
IVF #3 May-Jun 2017 (testosterone primed agonist/luteal lupron w/HGH - ER 6/4/17 - 14R, 5F, 3B, 0 normal)
**New RE**
IVF #4 Sept 2017 (natural start microdose lupron flare w/HGH - ER 9/28/17 - 33R, 18F, 10B, 4 PGS normals!)
FET #1 (medicated) of one PGS normal 4AA XX 11/2/17 - Beta #1 11/11/17 (153), Beta #2 11/13/17 (324), mc at 5w1d on 11/19/17
IVF #5 Dec 2017 - Insemination of 9 frozen eggs from 2012 (8F, 1B, 0 normal)
Jan 2018 - Natural cycle ERA (normal/receptive) & stimming for
IVF #6 Jan-Feb 2018 (natural start microdose lupron flare w/HGH - ER 2/3/18 - 17R, 6M, 4F, 0 blasts)
IVF #7 Feb 2018 (natural start microdose lupron flare w/HGH - ER 2/26/18 - 19R, 9M, 9F, 4B, 2 PGS normals)
FET #2 Apr 2018 (natural cycle w/o trigger, w/P4 support) of one PGS normal 4AA- XX 4/5/18 - Beta #1 4/14/18 (67), Beta #2 4/16/18 (231)
Rainbow baby girl born 12/16/2018 (via c-section, induced at 39 weeks)
-----
TFAS!
FET #3 Dec 2019 (natural cycle w/o trigger, w/P4 support) of one PGS normal 3BB XY 12/16/19 - Beta #1 12/24/19 (139), Beta #2 12/27/19 (482)
There were definitely one or two sentences about IF that seemed a little off - at one point she said something about 7 failed IVF cycles, and then at another point she talked about there being 7 embryos - and I thought: "I need more specifics. How many embryos did she get per retrieval cycle?" But a regular reader (without as much IVF exposure) might not have even noticed.
I thought she dealt with the emotional side of it really well, and I actually wept through some of her descriptions. All of the bits about the woman suffering through IF being like a zombie walking really resonated with me - like not wanting to listen to music, not wanting to feel anything, wanting to be distracted to take your mind off of anything other than the pain of it.
Anyway, I really liked it! Thank you for the recommendation!
@funkykey I was also hoping for a few more details on protocols and number of enmbies per cycle, but eventually made peace that it's a mainstream book and not this forum lol
I had the idea to maybe gift it to my mother and sister for Xmas... as a soft way into the IF/IVF topic if I ever need one...
Married 12/2016
TTC #1 since 04/2015
AMA, DOR (AMH 0.65, AFC 2-4) and autoimmune issues (RA, APS), low TSH, adenomyosis
7 retrievals, 3 transfers
Nov17 IVF2 - 1ER, 0F
Jan18 IVF3 - 3ER, 1F, 1ET, BFN
Feb18 - second opinion and additional testing
Apr18 IVF4 - cancelled (E2 too high)
May/Jun18 IVF4 - 4ER, 0M, 1F, 1 frozen day 3 (not best quality)
Jun/Jul18 IVF5 - 5 ER, 3M, 2F, 2 frozen day 3 (not best quality)
Jul/Aug18 IVF6 - 4ER, 3M, 2F, 2 frozen day 3 (good quality)
Aug/Sep18 IVF7 - cancelled (cyst)
Sep/Oct18 IVF7 - 3ER, 3M, 2F, 2 frozen Day 3 (excellent quality)
Oct18 IVF8 - Cancelled (cyst and too low TSH)
Oct18-Jan19 bringing TSH under control
Feb19 ERA and hysteroscopy
Mar19 Investigation for fibroid and adenomyosis
Apr19 adenomyosis confirmed, polyps removed
Jun19 FET after 2 months Lupron, autoimmune protocol, transferred two day 3 frozen embryos
Nov17 IVF2 - Pergoveris 2-14 Nov, Orgalutran 5-14 Nov, Ovitrelle 15 Nov, ER 17 Nov for 3 follies, 1 mature egg, did not fertilize
Jan18 IVF3 - Pergoveris 30 Dec - 8 Jan, Orgalutran 5-8 Jan, Ovitrelle 9 Jan, ER 11 Jan 3 eggs, 2 mature, 1 fertilized, ET 1x 4d 12-cell embryo 15/01, 24/01 BFN
May/Jun18 IVF4 - Rekovelle 25-29 May, Menogon 30May - 2Jun, Zomacton 25 27 29 31 May and 2Jun, Cetrotide 30May - 3Jun, Gonasi 3Jun, ER 5Jun 4 eggs, none mature, two matured overnight, 1 fertilized with ICSI, Frozen day 3 but not good quality
Jun/Jul18 IVF5 - Rekovelle 21-24 June, Menogon 25Jun-3Jul, Puregon 4-5Jul, Zomacton 21 23 25 27 29 Jun, Cetrotide 25Jun-5Jul, Gonasi 6Jul, ER 8Jul 5 eggs, 3 mature, 2 fertilized with ICSI, 2 frozen day 3 but not good quality
Jul/Aug18 IVF6 - Rekovelle 26-29 Jul, Menogon 30Jul-7Aug, Buserelin 26Jul-7Aug, Zomacton 26 28 30 Jul 1 3 Aug, Gonasi 7Aug, ER 9Aug 4 eggs, 3 mature, 2 fertilized (normal IVF), 2 frozen day 3 good quality
Sep/Oct18 IVF7 - Menogon 19-30Sep, Buserelin 19-30Sep, Zomacton 19 21 23 25 27 Sep, Ovitrelle 1 Oct, ER 3 eggs, 3 mature, 2 fertilized with ICSI, 2 frozen day 3 excellent quality
Fav Quote: The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
My story in signature spoiler. Children mentioned.
I don't produce FSH, so no natural menstrual cycle. DH has reduced morphology.
Summer 2014 IUI (with first husband): cancelled after almost a month of stims due to too many follicles
Time off to divorce, get back on my feet, find a new hubby and get married again 💑
March 2017 IVF#1: ~70 follicles, 13R, 10M, 7F, 3B = 2 PGS Normal (both XY) - no transfer due to ohss
Sept 2017 FET#1: BFP, Beta#1 (10dpt) - 253, Beta#2 (12dpt) - 528, DS born 05/31/2018 👨👩👦
Dec 2019 FET#2: BFN
Changed clinic, planning March 2020 IVF#2 - postponed due to the pandemic
April 2020 IVF #2: ~30 follicles, 24R, 12M, 8F, 4B = 2XY & 2XX, all normal
Sept 2020 FET#3: one XX embryo, BFP, Beta#1 (9dpt) - 161, Beta#2 (11dpt) - 519, Beta#3 (19dpt) - 7174, Due date 05/30/2021
DD born 05/23/2021 👨👩👧👦 - My family is now complete
@laurad75 Yeah, that absolutely ruined Little Fires Everywhere for me. I just couldn't deal with it.
I would love to hear if there are other popular novels to stay away from because of their poor/inaccurate treatment of IF or loss... I remember hating a couple novels I read this summer because of how inaccurate and hurtful their infertility plotlines were, namely Wreckage by Emily Bleecker and Mothers & Other Strangers by Gina Sorell.
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog