I need help with saying no to MY step-grandmother...
Back story - She babysat my DS for the past 2 years and there was a lot that went on that we didn't appreciate or feel comfortable with (she had bats in her house, their house was always a mess, she gave our son pop when he was 1, wouldn't put him down for naps - the worst of it was that they woukd take DS out on errands and my 82 yo grandpa would drive.) We have a pretty rocky history, she and I didn't speak for 2 years and initially when she offered to watch my 2 YO I didn't want her to but I was put on the spot and felt like I had to say yes and I've regretted that decision ever since.... I'm not comfortable with her watching my kids, my husband is even more uncomfortable with it. It's time to tell her no. But How?
Now our 2nd is here and IF I go back to work in Jan - she's already implied that she's watching both boys and we DON'T want her to.
Additionally she wants to take my oldest son 1 day next week for a few hours and even asked for "play dates" with him since im home on leave and they aren't watching him currently. I don't want them to take him at all any more and i really just want to cut all ties with them (theres a LONG history leading me to this decision...)