I definitely second @jlemons-2 and would encourage you to participate here as much as you feel like. Everyone here was new once and we can all learn from each other and share experiences. I also think that the certain level of relative anonymity here can help people be more open.
On a side note, there seems to be kind of a mean girls vibe about this whole Facebook page thing and I wouldn't worry about hitting some magical number of posts to qualify.
There’s no ‘mean girls thing’ with the Facebook group. If members don’t feel like they have a sense of who you are, there become concerns related to safety. There have been lots of catfish situations which make members uneasy, as you can imagine. A lot more information is shared on Facebook. I’m not open to joining a group where I don’t feel safe. If all members of this BMB were able to join the Facebook group, I can guarantee I would not request to join out of safety concerns.
About me: TTC#1: October 2015 dx: PCOS & MFI IUI #1 w/Femara + Ovidrel June 2016 ~ BFP July 2016: Blighted Ovum IUI #2 w/Femara + Ovidrel September 2016 ~BFN IUI #3 w/Femara + Ovidrel October 2016 ~BFN IUI #4 w/Femara + Ovidrel November 2016 ~BFN IVF with ICSI January 2017 ~BFN FET February 2017 ~BFN IVF with ICSI March 2017 ~BFP--Twins Due 12/8/17 Team Blue X 2!
While I agree that Facebook presents more opportunities for creepy people to exploit others, and I agree that it's not unfair to want an established history before adding someone, the whole "post like crazy and maybe we'll add you" thing sounds a lot like "you can't sit with us."
We've said it before and we'll say it again - it was the general, popular opinion of the entire BMB to have a certain level of name recognition to join the FB group. An analogy if you will: not every person agrees with board organization in the beginning, but the board still takes on some form of organization that is favored by the majority. This is the same way. Not everyone agrees with having minimum requirements to move to FB, understandably. But majority rules and this is something that has been discussed extensively since the beginning.
The admins have all truly done our due diligence and talked with each other about every single person that may not have been recognized. We have read post history, discussed people that largely participate on threads the messaged admin may not frequent, etc, etc. None of us are making snap decisions.
I am honestly sorry if anyone thinks this has a "mean girl" vibe - that's not anyone's intention, but it's the nature of the beast when you slap minimum requirements on something and people start realizing they don't meet those. Which, by the way, is about as impersonal as it gets so I am kind of at a loss at the mean girl label, but you're all allowed your own opinions and I do respect that.
There are no exceptions. That makes it fair and equal and prevents any kind of personal bias, etc.
I just sent this privately to someone and I am going to repeat it: I am not saying this to be snotty at all but there are quite a few private December baby Facebook groups that do NOT require any kind of prelim participation that may be something you want to look into if that's something in which you're interested.
It is not that anyone is not "allowed" into the FB group. It is that some do not meet the criteria YET as established by the general consensus of this group when we all (meaning all who participate on this board) discussed forming the FB group together at the beginning of last month. There have been other people who were also told to please step up their participation on this board before joining the FB Group. They did and now they are a part of the FB group without question. Some who were told same thing chose to continue to not participate meaningfully on this board and therefore do not meet the minimal criteria to be a part of the FB group where people's real names, photos and other private information is available. I do not believe asking for a little effort is a lot to ask when people's privacy is at stake. I am sorry to those who disagree.
@KayLee77 thank you very much I appreciate it alot. If I'm allowed on the group that you are a part of please do add me as I have no hidden agendas and even use my real name here in this group. My email address is r.f.evrka@gmail.com and Facebook name is Eva louw. As I use my Nick name on Facebook as I have a difficult name for some.
@evreka I wasn’t going to comment on this, but t seems like you just are not letting this go, so here’s my 2 cents... Once again, the Facebook group is for people who have been participating in this Bump birth month board since the beginning of their pregnancies. No disrespect, but I have never seen you involved in anything on this board until now, asking to be in this private Facebook group. I don’t really know why you’d want to be in a Facebook group with a bunch of strangers, TBH. I personally don’t feel comfortable having my private information easily accessible for some random person to see. Stranger danger is real. Please continue to participate on the bump as much as you’d like. We love having people to add to all conversations and debates! But this late in the game, I really don’t know why you’d want to be in a private Facebook group with a bunch of women who you’ve had virtually no interaction with until this week.
Also wanted to add that I would be happy with @rebeckyjoy joining the group. I’m actually surprised that she isn’t! Again, just my 2 cents
@evreka sounds like they all grew a bond during their 9 months. It also sounds like it's a Facebook group for friends. I personally don't have a facebook and after my LO is born I'll be looking for a blog group of moms who babies share the same date of birth.
Re: D'17 Official Facebook Group
TTC#1: October 2015
dx: PCOS & MFI
IUI #1 w/Femara + Ovidrel June 2016 ~ BFP
July 2016: Blighted Ovum
IUI #2 w/Femara + Ovidrel September 2016 ~BFN
IUI #3 w/Femara + Ovidrel October 2016 ~BFN
IUI #4 w/Femara + Ovidrel November 2016 ~BFN
IVF with ICSI January 2017 ~BFN
FET February 2017 ~BFN
IVF with ICSI March 2017 ~BFP--Twins Due 12/8/17
Team Blue X 2!
The admins have all truly done our due diligence and talked with each other about every single person that may not have been recognized. We have read post history, discussed people that largely participate on threads the messaged admin may not frequent, etc, etc. None of us are making snap decisions.
I am honestly sorry if anyone thinks this has a "mean girl" vibe - that's not anyone's intention, but it's the nature of the beast when you slap minimum requirements on something and people start realizing they don't meet those. Which, by the way, is about as impersonal as it gets so I am kind of at a loss at the mean girl label, but you're all allowed your own opinions and I do respect that.
There are no exceptions. That makes it fair and equal and prevents any kind of personal bias, etc.
I just sent this privately to someone and I am going to repeat it: I am not saying this to be snotty at all but there are quite a few private December baby Facebook groups that do NOT require any kind of prelim participation that may be something you want to look into if that's something in which you're interested.
ETA:
Signed,
@flowerpower5838 @MJDsquared @ktcakes87 @failuretofly @Marley629
Me: 29 DH: 31
Married 10/13/12
TTC Since 8/2016
@evreka don't totally give up on this board, we will still be here to support you and answer any questions you may have.
DX Diminished Ovarian Reserve, Factor V Leiden Mutation, Secondary Infertility
MFI (SA #1Count 11mill, Motility: 18%, Morphology: 1%)
AMH .328 | FSH 13.2
Once again, the Facebook group is for people who have been participating in this Bump birth month board since the beginning of their pregnancies. No disrespect, but I have never seen you involved in anything on this board until now, asking to be in this private Facebook group. I don’t really know why you’d want to be in a Facebook group with a bunch of strangers, TBH. I personally don’t feel comfortable having my private information easily accessible for some random person to see. Stranger danger is real.
Please continue to participate on the bump as much as you’d like. We love having people to add to all conversations and debates! But this late in the game, I really don’t know why you’d want to be in a private Facebook group with a bunch of women who you’ve had virtually no interaction with until this week.
Also wanted to add that I would be happy with @rebeckyjoy joining the group. I’m actually surprised that she isn’t! Again, just my 2 cents
TODAY is the LAST DAY to submit requests to join the Facebook group!!
If you are a REGULAR POSTER and are interested in joining, please send a PM to myself or one of the other admins @ktcakes87 @MJDsquared @flowerpower5838 @Marley629
Thanks everyone!