PGAL Check-in w/o 9/24

doxiemoxie212

I know our board is still new and small, but from the intros it sounds like a fair number of us are suffering from PGAL brain, so perhaps a check-in would be nice to get the ball rolling for June.  

How far along are you?

Any appointments coming up?

Questions?

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)

GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child? 

bkrahn

How far along are you?
4 weeks 2 day
 
Any appointments coming up?
waiting to hear back from my doctor on possibly having another beta test. Other than that, ultrasound around 8 weeks. 

Questions?
none.

How are you doing? 
TMI, but DH and I DTD Tuesday evening and I guess it got a little rougher than usual and *TW* afterwards a had light bleeding for a few minutes, and very light spotting through the night. It stopped by morning, and I didn't have any cramping, which makes me feel a bit better.. but it still scared the shit out of me and I have felt very uneasy ever since. Has this happened to anyone else? I never had any sort of spotting with DD, so the sight of blood gave me the worst flashbacks.

GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child? 
Honestly, Dirty Dancing & Grease 

sorry, for some reason I can't figure out how to un-bold everything *face palm*

doxiemoxie212

How far along are you? 4+5

Any appointments coming up? No, just waiting on my beta results from Monday and Wednesday

Questions? not right now

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) I'm doing okay. I'm actually a little worried that I'm getting too accepting of this pregnancy being real. I feel like I should keep my guard up in case something bad happens again (I had an early loss in Sept last year), but I also want to try to enjoy being pregnant! 

GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child? I was obsessed with the movie Beethoven! The one with the dog lol I'd make my parents watch it with me over and over and over.  I also loved Clueless a lot. 

@bkrahn and that's why I refuse to have sex with DH! Lol. We haven't banged since I ovulated, and I'm not sure when I'll feel comfortable doing it again. I have some small benign cysts on my cervix that sometimes cause me to spot a little after sex, and even though intellectually I know it's completely fine, I also know it would freak me the eff out lol. Poor DH. 

lilyaster

How far along are you? 

3w 5d

Any appointments coming up? 

I go for a beta either tomorrow or Monday, not sure after that.

Questions?

Not really

How are you doing?

Nervous   I've had 4 consecutive losses and one before that, so...  I'm hopeful though, this is the first time I'll be on progesterone and lovenox.  3 losses were at the end of 1st tri so it's going to be a difficult few months one way or another.  I don't know if you ever stop worrying after loss.

GTKY- favorite childhood movie: I don't know why but we repeatedly watched the Ernest movies when I was a kid- Ernest goes to jail, Ernest goes to camp, etc. 

catlady1215

Good call! Does seem like we got a good bit already

How far along are you? 5 wks today

Any appointments coming up? ultrasound on tues, and another dr apt on wed

Questions? arrrgh I don't think

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
this is awful. I almost feel like I'm just waiting for the bad news. Telling myself those back to back losses had a reason.. so how would this one even work?? I'm scared shitless for the ultrasound on tues. Chances of a heartbeat are slim at that point. And even though I know that, it'll upset me. And I'm also just expecting bad news anyway.

GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child? 
I was big on the 'tgif' shows. Full house, step by step, family matters, home improvement
movies, grease and dirty dancing

catlady1215

@bkrahn I'm the same as doxiemoxie212 we still haven't done it since we conceived! I do this every time cause I'm just scared. I apologized the other day and he completely understood lol.

bkrahn

@doxiemoxie212 ugh, I don't blame you! I've had bleeding after sex before (when I wasn't pregnant) and I'm trying to remind myself that it's normal, but man, scary shit. DH was like "we definitely aren't doing that again for a few days.." and I'm like oh, honey, it'll be a bit longer than a few days  don't know when I'll be ready for that again. 

@catlady1215
I hear ya! I am trying to hard to enjoy this pregnancy, and I really want to be able to do that, but part of me is just preparing for that bad news again. I had back to back losses 3 months apart, and I don't know if this fear will ever go away. 

catlady1215

@bkrahn I've been telling myself that losses seriously take all the joy out of this. -TW- I know I'm beyond blessed that we had 1 yrs ago with no losses before hand. -END TW-
But I look back and can't believe how easy going I felt in the beginning. I miss that. I don't think I'll get to that till a third of this pregnancy is over (if I get there) and that just sucks.
my losses were close also. Sept 2016 and dec2016.

jsl82

Hi Ladies- super excited about this weekly discussion.  I pretty much only participated on the PGAL board from my Jan17 board and didn't follow the group over when everyone left for facebook.  I really miss my PGAL ladies, so I'm excited to get to know all of you too.  Does everyone like these questions?  We had different questions on my last board, I liked them better- a little more geared towards the PGAL brain.    

1. Tell us about yourself (if your first participating)
2. how far along are you? EDD? Team green pink or blue?
3. How are you feeling (pregnancy symptoms)

4. How are you feeling (anxiety wise) 
5. When is your next appointment? 
6. Rants/raves/whatever 

7. GTKY -

Just a suggestion.  And @doxiemoxie212 let me know if you would like me or anyone else to start this post every week- since you have been single handedly running the June board so far (and thank you for that).

@bkrahn I've never experienced the bleeding after sex- but I did have some spotting during my 2nd pregnancy and everything was fine, except my placenta was a little low.  FX that everything is fine for you.  

How far along are you?
6w2d

Any appointments coming up?
My first OB appointment is 10/26.  It's with a new different OB than I had with DD and I'm nervous that she doesn't know my history- or anything about me since I've never met her.  

Questions?
nope

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
I'm anxious.  As some of you have mentioned it's really hard to enjoy pregnancy after a loss (or more than 1 loss).  I felt like I never enjoyed my pregnancy with my DD and I would really like to be able to enjoy this pregnancy.  

GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child? 
I know when I was really little I loved She-Ra and My Little Pony.  I liked Saved by the Bell and TGIF when I was older.  My favorite movie was Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.

doxiemoxie212

@jsl82 good suggestions for Qs! I like! I just stole the questions from the first PGAL check in I could find on another BMB 

I think whoever gets to it first should start the weekly check-ins, if that works? Unless you've found in the past it's easier if there's a designated person? On TTGP we just had whoever thought of it first post it, but admittedly that did mean sometimes certain threads were forgotten until late in the week...  

And yeah, a little over excited over here for this board to get up and running. I'm v happy this is no longer an empty shell and hoping to soon not be the only person who has started threads haha.

bkrahn

@catlady1215 I was literally just saying the same thing to my husband - I miss being so blissfully unaware of everything that could go wrong, like I was with my first pregnancy before experiencing both losses.

SpencerSimental

How far along are you?
4 weeks

Any appointments coming up?

October 30th first appointment

Questions?
 not at the moment 

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
excited but nervous, this pregnancy is nothing like my last. Hoping all is well and trying to stay positive 


GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child? 
I was obsessed with the little mermaid 

jsl82

@doxiemoxie212 I think my last board had designed members on the boards, but in general one person tends to take over each of the post.  My PGAL brain makes me hesitant to officially sign up to start a weekly post, but I'm sure most of the weekly post will eventually fall into a rhythm. The biggest difference between the BMB and TTC board is that we are all suppose to be here for 9 months so there isn't a constant influx of members joining and leaving- it makes for more routine of the weekly post. We can address it in a few weeks if we start seeing multiple people start the same post weekly or certain posts are skipped/delayed.    

And stay excited- hoping your enthusiasm is contagious enough to ward off some of my own anxiety.   

doxiemoxie212

@jsl82 sounds good.

And lol, my enthusiasm stems entirely from boredom. I freelance and July-October are my slowest months typically, so I'd been posting a lot on TTGP to keep the boredom at bay. At first I was like, okay, I'm not going to jinx this with excitement. But now I'm like eff it I'm so bored, are jinxes real? Let's find out! I am typically not this enthusiastic about anything, but if it helps your anxiety I'll try to keep it going  

BurlapandLace

How far along are you? 3w3d

Any appointments coming up? Not at this time. My doctor likes to do pee (and potentially blood tests - especially AL) to confirm pregnancy before scheduling initial appointments and ultrasounds. I really didn’t like the way she handled by CP (I actually have an upcoming appointment with a new doctor in November, but I am stuck with this one until then) so I plan to wait until I’ve at least made it passed my loss mark before I call in and get the ball rolling with her. I probably should go in earlier, but I really don’t want to deal with her at this point. Maybe that’s the wrong call. I don’t know 

Questions? Not at this time 

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) I’m feeling very “cautiously optimistic” at this point. I don’t generally use expensive tests until I’ve gotten some sort of a line on an IC. Last time I was getting stark whites on the ICs, so I thought we were out. Then I missed my period, tested with an IC again but it was still stark white. FRERs and digi’s (and later a blood test) were all positive though before the loss. This time I tested on an FRER first only because it was our anniversary and it was only 9dpo - I knew if I had any chance of seeing a line I would have to use one of those. After getting a line on a FRER yesterday I tested on an IC and got a crazy super squinty line that I honestly thought was probably just my eyes playing tricks. Today I got what is still a SUPER light squinty line, but it’s more obvious than yesterday. So that gives me hope, since I am at least seeing something on ICs this time and I saw nothing last time. The lines are still super duper light, but at 10dpo it’s still really early. I’m glad it’s more obvious today than it was yesterday and I’m hoping to see them continue to get darker  

GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child? Matilda! 

doxiemoxie212

Just got my beta results back.

Monday 17dpo: 444 / Wednesday 19dpo: 964. Progesterone at 37.3. I feel a lot more relaxed!

BurlapandLace

@doxiemoxie212 - yay!! 

napqueen

How far along are you?
  4 weeks & 5 days 

Any appointments coming up? 
I have a viability scan scheduled for October 12th! I have Factor V and will have to do daily Lovenox injections once viability is confirmed. 

Questions?
None at this time

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
I think I’m doing pretty well, I’m still trying to keep my excitement under control. So is my husband, which so he basically hasn’t acknowledged that I’m pregnant. I think he was pretty crushed last time, he’ll be excited after the first appointment  

GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child? 
I absolutely loved the Nickelodeon game shows and the old All That. 

bkrahn

@doxiemoxie212 yay!! I go back for another round next week! 

BurlapandLace

Tested on another IC this morning (hoping to see a good progression of lines getting darker) and today’s is even more squinty than yesterday’s was. DH is trying to convince me not to freak out but PGAL brain is in full swing. Im 11dpo and the ICs line yesterday was super light and I’m not liking it one bit that today is lighter. 

doxiemoxie212

@BurlapandLace are you using FMU or midday?

BurlapandLace

@doxiemoxie212 ~ FMU 

doxiemoxie212

@BurlapandLace so that's what I was doing at first too but try afternoon urine. Even though mine was more diluted then, my lines were darker. I have no idea why but if you google it apparently that's often the case. 

catlady1215

@BurlapandLace I agree!! I had better progression with SMU. I stopped testing first thing.

BurlapandLace

Thanks @doxiemoxie212 and @catlady1215 ~ I just held for 4 hours and tested with SMU and got a line that was darker than yesterday. It’s still light, now it’s not what I would call a squinter anymore. It’s a pretty obvious, but light line. FX!! Man, this ish is stressful! 

WaitingMay14

How far along are you? 4 + 6 

Any appointments coming up? Us Monday at 330 
monday -105 hcg 14 dpo 
wed- 168 16 dpo 
Saturday morning (today)- 301 19 dpo. 

Questions? My levels are quite doubling should I be nervous  Drs office is always quite pessimistic said they needed to see the US to confirm. 

How are you doing? Nervous nelly !! Being a loss Mom sucks 

GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child?  Rainbow brite 

silvergreen

How far along are you?
4+2

Any appointments coming up?
Not yet.

Questions?
What kind of symptoms are you ladies experiencing? I am feeling this unusual fullness that I don't remember during my first pregnancy/loss.

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)
Struggling. As mentioned above (and in my intro post) I've been experiencing a very full feeling in my uterus/cervix area that makes me feel like something is going to come out. Ugh, so weird and difficult to explain, but I'm trying not to let me PGAL brain panic but kind of failing!!

GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child? 
Probably Xena: Warrior Princess! #princessgoals

bkrahn

@silvergreen I had a bit of nausea between 3&4 weeks, but nothing over the past few days. My morning sickness didn't kick in until 6-7 weeks with DD, so I'm not worried. Other than that just insane bloating and tingly nipples at times. Also a feeling a fullness/ stretching in my pelvic area.

kbrown2385

How far along are you?

4 weeks 1 day

Any appointments coming up?

I will be going in for a blood draw on Monday. I have to "prove I'm pregnant" with my pcp before I can get referred to my ob

silvergreen

Thanks! @bkrahn

I think I just need to relax about it. It's just been a little uncomfortable, so PGAL brain kicks in and tries to say there's something wrong. I have read that each individual pregnancy is different, which seems to be true for me. I don't really have sore boobs this time!

bkrahn

@silvergreen I hear ya! My first loss was a MMC and up until the very end I had strong morning sickness.. so I try to remind myself of that whenever I freak out over not having symptoms..having symptoms doesn't always mean that everything is going well either. That being said, I've been experiencing a lot of symptoms I had with DD, and I didn't have them with my last two losses, so I'm taking that as a good sign. That PGAL brain is a real bitch. 

twelvetwosomeonenew

bkrahn said:

That PGAL brain is a real bitch. 

So.so. true. 

twelvetwosomeonenew

How far along are you? 4 + 2

Any appointments coming up? just betas. 

Questions? nope. 

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)  I am pretty much scared out of my mind. We had actually decided that our hearts really couldn't handle another loss (2 consecutive after 2 successful healthy pregnancies) & I was planning to have an IUD put in later this month to put TTC on an indefinite hold..... but, plans have changed.  and I am just feverishly trying not to get attached to a poppy seed sized baby I might not get to meet.  

GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child? Rescue Rangers!

PatientlyWaiting10

How far along are you? 4 weeks 6 days

Any appointments coming up? BW today for Beta and Progesterone Levels, First OB appt and US 10/19

Questions? none

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here) It seems to come in waves.  At times I am super excited and feeling great and other times (like this morning) I am super nervous.  I am crampy, no spotting, which I know it normal, but still scared.  Warning TMI: I may look at the toilet paper and in the toilet.  Every. Time.    I hate those feelings.  

GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child? I LOVED Full House!  I think it was on every night at like 5:00 pm and we would always make it a priority to watch it.  Movie, I loved Pippy Longstocking.

catlady1215

@patientlywaiting10 I absolutely check tp and toilet every time. then I examine my underwear for even the tiniest spot. annnd I'm making random bathroom trips JUST to check without even going. its disgusting that we have to feel this way, I hate it so much.

catlady1215

I'm starting to panic for my ultrasound today. I don't expect to be one of the few that actually see a heartbeat this early. But I'm so scared they wont see anything... empty sac. doesn't help that my boobs don't hurt today. even though the slight yuck feeling is around still.

if i lose this baby, I'll be dealing with it the same time as I'm expected to help with and be at a baby shower for someone that had an oops, one time, dad not involved, pregnancy... who is in nooooo position to be having a baby. I had a similar, but kinda different, situation with my last pregnancy. that was tough, really don't want to be doing it again.

BurlapandLace

@catlady1215 ~ FX for your ultrasound!

doxiemoxie212

@catlady1215 aw, girl   **hugs** All I can say is try to take your mind off it for now. What will be will be. And if it's bad news, just effing quit that baby shower nonsense. 

I have all my fingers and toes crossed for good news at your ultrasound though. I so so so so so hope everything looks perfect! 

eloquinn

How far along are you?

4w4 days 

Any appointments coming up?

Nope. Going to phone for a blood test on Monday and will get seen when the OBGyn finally has space (we have a shortage of medical staff here) 

Questions?

How are you doing? (Dear diary posts and venting are welcome and encouraged here)

Scared. In denial. Full of gas.

GTKY:  What was your favorite TV show or movie when you were a child?

Tough one! The Simpsons most likely.