WTF Wednesday - 9/13

curiousfool1

Advance warning - needing to vent.  This probably could also be posted on the baby shower thread, but I didn't want to bring the spirit of that thread down by shower drama negativity (seeing as my shower hasn't even happened yet).

I've alluded on other threads that there is serious family drama going on with my mother at the moment.  I won't rehash everything.  The shower is raising whole new levels of melodrama.  The elder of my two sisters is not presently on speaking terms with my mother because of all the ongoing family drama, but the two of them are planning the shower together.  6 weeks ago my mother has also started seeing a new beau.  The relationship is getting very very serious, very rapidly.  Needless to say we all have concerns.  My sister's concerns about this relationship, combined with her overall concerns over my mother's health and behavior, and my mother's particular personality are proving to be combustible.  The one and only request I had for this baby shower was no- drama; family drama really ruined my bridal shower and I did not want a repeat.  Instead, the two of them are in complete cat-fight meltdown mode over the new beau; both have their hackles up; and both are turning this weekend into from something I was really looking forward to into something I'm rather dreading.

The shower drama is carrying over into baby-arrival drama.  My mother wants to come out to meet the baby right away, but has agreed to give me a week to get settled back home and make sure the baby-dog introduction is smooth before coming.  Due to her financial limitations, however, buying a plane ticket to get here is prohibitively expensive.  She informed me that the new beau would be driving her out to meet the baby and staying with her while she is here.  Staying with her in my house.  New beau is a smoker.  I still haven't met new beau, and my husband will never have met the guy before the baby's arrival.  I am barely comfortable with the idea of trying to sort out how to breastfeed in front of my immediate family members I've known my whole life! I am definitely not comfortable having a complete stranger in my house that whole time.  My husband is not comfortable with it, and really does not want to be in the position of trying to entertain the guy all day.  When we informed my mom that visitors would be limited to immediate family only - and that the new beau is not considered immediate family - she turned it all into a melodramatic judgment on her relationship.  Maybe I am over-reacting? I don't know.  The guy is probably a really nice, good person.  But in my mind, whether or not he is a good person is rather beside the point.  My house, my comfort, my baby ... my rules.  

Thanks for listening.

littlemissc17

@curiousfool1 I don't think you're overreacting at all. Bringing home your baby is such a crazy, wonderful, stressful time and your comfort is so important. That's awesome that you stood up to your mom. Regardless of the relationship with your mom, this guy is a stranger to you and your feelings on the matter should be respected. 

I have a crazy mom too, so I understand how it can be frustrating, especially when you're trying to set boundaries and they try to find a way to make it about them and make you feel bad about it. Stand your ground and don't let it drive you too crazy!

NYTino24

@curiousfool1 will you be upset if she doesn't come at all if she can't come with him? Why would he be alone with your husband? You can definitely have him smoke outside only. You are right that you get to make decisions about who is in your home, but be prepared if she doesn't come.

NYTino24

WTF to the bruise from my terbutaline shot 15 days ago still hanging around?!?

MaximumEffort

WTF to husband coming home at 2 freaking AM when at 1022 he said he was leaving work soon. I don't give a crap that it was a benefit at work, you don't come home at 2 AM and just be "my bad".  So now, on my last day off in a row I'm sleep deprived and so pissed off at him cause he just snored all night while I tried to get comfortable with this kid kicking me in the rib and opposite hip. No sleep was had by me but by all means keep sleeping, I haven't been up with you and DD every morning this week. Even if he was just at work I don't feel like talking to him. 

kaitlinliz

WTF to DH for arguing with me about baby's name. We've come to a semi consensus about it but I hate the original spelling. I offered a suggestion on changing it and having it so people can pronounce it (or at least have a chance of pronouncing it) and he complains that it'll change its meaning and then I should just pick a name because I don't like what he comes up with....what? Who's the pregnant one with hormones? But he's the one acting so irrational. 

kdl89

WTF to my dog getting sprayed by a skunk tonight. We have bathed her 5 times with random things we have found online to help remove the smell and she still stinks .... so she is in our entry way for the night with the windows open so the smell doesn't go through the house.

curiousfool1

@kdw89- Nature's Miracle Skunk Remover. Only thing that has worked for us and it is quite literally a miracle worker. So worth buying. 

kdl89

@curiousfool1 I just bought it today the girl at the store said it was good and she has only heard good things. Also got home and tried it and it seems to be helping I figure another wash with it and we will be good.