Baby cries so hard during sleep training she stops breathing for a second

eaprice01

We just started the ferber method with my 4 month old and while she has fallen asleep right away with dad with minimal fussing,  she literally screams bloody murder with me. Today I noticed on the monitor she kept on falling asleep then startling herself to wake and when I went in to check on her I realized she was waking up because she had stopped breathing for a second!!


Any advice?? Yes we're setting time limits and yes I'm going in to comfort her periodically.  Also I asked my mom (a veteran mom of 8) and she said she's fine,  it's normal for babies to do that when they're that upset and I should have left her in there and let her learn to comfort herself.  

Also, I'm only interested in CIO or sleep training advice. If you're anti CIO our opinions differ so please don't comment. 

redheeler

CIO doesn't work for every baby or every family. Sleep training is also not recommended before 6 months. 
You say she's waking herself up when she stops breathing? Which means she's not in the middle of screaming (which is normal) 

pick up your baby, rock her to sleep or at least drowsy, they're only little once. It sounds like CIO isn't working for you, or going back in may be making it worse. If you're set on making her scream herself to sleep which it sounds like you are, it may be worth trying a complete elimination method, don't go back in until she's completely asleep

pshaortao

Not anti CIO here, we did it with my daughter but 4 months is still young. There is a lot going on a 4 months: sleep regression, growth spurt, developmental spurt etc. I suggest waiting awhile longer before trying again. 

As for the breathing,  if you're concerned, then I would address it to the pediatrician asap.

Best of luck

psherman42wwsa

Are you noticing this just at bedtime or are you using sleep training for naps as well? When I did sleep training with my older son (not cio)  it was recommended to start in the morning with your methods. Not to wait until bedtime when they are over tired. 


If your baby is so upset that she stops breathing please go get her immediately. She needs you, she's just a baby.

I agree with others that it may be too early. My ds currently wakes up every 1.5 hours at night so I'm desperate for sleep as well but I plan to wait a few more weeks. I don't want to do it now unsuccessfully and then have to do it again. 

psherman42wwsa

If the startle reflex is waking her up you could try the baby Merlin magic sleep suit. 

BeachMommy2B

First of all, if your mom is a veteran mom of 8, she should know that if a baby gets so upset that they literally stop breathing that is NOT OK. I can't think of anything worse then letting your baby cry so hard they get to the point where they stop breathing or hyperventilate!!! 

Be a mom and pick your freaking child up! If you are in May then your baby can't be more then 4 or 5 months old, too young to soothe themselves. And even if your baby was older then 6 months, what you are doing is just WRONG! Go back to the drawing board and find a different method! 

neludelu

Being a veteran mom of 8 doesn't make you a child expert. What you're doing is wrong, I hope things have improved.