Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

How long?

I miscarried my first pregnancy january 5th 2017. I have been having a really hard time coping since but a couple months ago I thought I might have been doing better. (Making it a whole week without tears.) The past two weeks though I have been a complete train wreck. My due date is in a week and 2 days and I'm sure that is sending me off the deep end. Does anybody else have input on how long it took them to heal?

Re: How long?

  • Options
    Sources say that it can take up until 1 year after the birth of a live child to recover from a previous MC. Unfortunately I can't speak for the happier side of things since I'm 4 MC in without a live child, and I'm the mayor of depression city. Take care of yourself, and if you need to look into therapy or antidepressants or anything, please don't hesitate to do so. Grief takes time to work and process through and dealing with an estimated due date arrival, holidays, etc. can be very hard and trigger sad thoughts. Good luck!

    MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
    MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
    MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
    RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
    MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
    RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
    MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)

    RE #3: More testing 2023. 
    Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
    Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
    Lupron Depo March 2024.  Benched 3 months.  Hopefully FET after that.


  • Options
    I'm so sorry for your loss. I don't think there is any specific time-frame whereby we will automatically feel back to normal. You said you were doing better - and that is great. As you have identified - your due date is coming and of course that's going to bring it all back to the front of your mind - how could it not?! I had a m/c at 9 weeks, due next February and I'm already dreading that. I guess just know that this time will come and will pass - if you can, try do something nice for yourself around that time? Or at least take some time to yourself and be kind to yourself. You are doing great - and it's ok to feel bad at this time. Maybe if you could get counselling/therapy, or just talk it all through with a good friend that will listen. You will naturally be very sensitive to dates - but others around you may not have remembered that this was to be your special time. Take care and good luck
    **History in Spoiler**
    Me 39, DH 40
    Married Oct 2010, TTC ~7yrs
    Seeing RE since Spring 2013
    Clomid - no response
    Letrozole (6 months) 2015 
    Laperoscopy/Hysteroscopy in 2015
    Puregon injectibles + trigger x5 in 2016 - all BFN
    Started IVF March 2017 - 25 follies, 9 eggs, 3 fertilised, 1 survived-> frozen due to hyper stimulation of ovaries
    FET May 16th 2017, BFP May 27th 2017, m/c @ 9wks
    IVF #2 February 2018 - 16 eggs, 8 fertilised, 3 frozen embabies
    Awaiting FET April 2018 - cancelled (cyst)
    FET May 2018, BFP June 2nd 2018, m/c @ 8wks
    FET October 2018 - BFN
    Final FET - late November 2018

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