Weekly Random Aug 13 - 20

kdl89

Time to share your random happenings! 

kdl89

I feel like I have started nesting this week. We painted babies room Wednesday and ever since then I have been cleaning things out and doing random little things around the house I wanted to get done. We moved in to out house in Dec so we had some boxes that we didn't unpack in our spare room well today I started to go though them. I have 1 big box and 2 little ones left to go through hoping to get that room looking usable before the end of August. 

kaitlinliz

I have the anxiety to start nesting without the energy. All I want to do is clean and get the nursery together. We moved here in Jan - got our shipped stuff in Feb. So we're in the same boat @kdw89 but I have 0 motivation to do it when the day comes. I had plans this weekend to clean out the spare room and it didn't happen. I watched netflix all day instead 

NYTino24

+1 to nesting... I even went to my mother's house and cleaned / organized.

ames011

Wish I could nest/set up nursery but we are moving in with my parents in early September while work is done on our new house (aka serious fixer upper). Will hopefully move in January and get some belated nesting then. 

In other less than optimal things. I am currently at the airport waiting for my 2 hr flight which is followed by a 2 hr layover and then an 11 HOUR flight home (all alone). Super nervous about the long day and flight, wish me luck. 

dragonfly87-2

I feel bummed a lot of regulars haven't been on these boards much and it seems really slow...and my guess are just doing the Facebook group now (or not really sure). 

I haven't seen or heard from @DuchessOfCambridge  @jess0211 @bcashaw @QTAmum3 @cmessamore @mississippicatfish @bklynchica  in a long time

MaximumEffort

I can't even get on the Facebook. The email associated with my FB was closed a couple years ago and FB isn't adding my new email address. 

Abby7

I have not been invited to the FB group...maybe someday

cmessamore

Thanks for thinking of us! I can only speak for myself, but it's been hard to juggle the Facebook group and TB. I do come here a lot and try keep up with everyone's lives, but I feel weird posting the same things on TB as FB, so I don't post often. Honestly, the FB group has been great. We've all really gotten to know each other better that way, plus it's less glitchy than TB. I'd love to see the rest of the regs come to FB when you're ready! No catfishes in sight yet! Lol 

kaitlinliz

@cmessamore what's the facebook group?

DungeonTrollMel

Will late comers be invited?

Abby7

Yes, I don't think we know how to get there.

lancomechica2

Good morning!!! Crazy day already. Glucose test and my thyroid blood draws. So much going on this week. Husband is gone in Seattle all week. Single parenting 

cwalker042

@dragonfly87-2 I'm bummed too. I came here to share my pregnancy and hear advice and experiences from others who are due the same month as I am. Those who moved over to FB said they'd also still post here but unfortunately that did not happen. 

I felt like I was in total nest mode this weekend. We went to IKEA Saturday and bought our son a big boy bed and a new dresser. We also got LO's dresser as well. We were not planning to buy any of that when we went there but I just loved them and was surprised at how solid the furniture is. It's not Stickley but it's better than Target. When we got home I got right to work on painting son's bedroom while hubby started to put LO's dresser together. Sunday I was able to get the second coat of paint on son's room and hubby was able to get his bed put together. I was also able to wash all of LO's newborn and 0-3 month clothing now that I have a dresser to put them in. I still have the desire to keep going but I'm sick and on the couch today. 

curiousfool1

I'm disappointed as well by the lack of regular discussion around here!  (It's partly why I've decided to just start reintroducing some of the older weekly threads, in hopes to reinvigorate some of that discussion.)  My husband and I have decided to take a very quite approach to announcements with this pregnancy - as in, we didn't do one, and we have not said anything on social media.  I know the FB group is a closed group, but I don't even want the fact that I liked or followed the group itself to show up in the FB feeds of my friends and give my pregnancy away.  Tech-warts aside, I came to TB to find a community of women all due in November with whom I could share thoughts/comments/issues/etc. about this pregnancy while still retaining a little shred of anonymity away from the FB world.  I've really found these discussions helpful!

I had a moment two weeks ago or so when I thought about asking to join the FB group for this month.  Not only is it private (as in, can't search for it on FB), the people who formed that group who still are on this board have very regularly asked TB to delete and remove any and all posts about the FB group.  I guess part of me understands they wanted that FB group to really be made up of women who would interact regularly and respectfully, but learning that they wanted even information about how to join the group deleted from this page rubbed me the wrong way.  

kdl89

I agree it suck the discussions have gone down in numbers. I know I didn't feel comfortable joining a  Facebook group as people could see way to much of my personal life. It took a lot for me to come out of my shell just on the bump to add comments and take part in conversations. 

dragonfly87-2

Hopefully we can start to revive the discussion board!

On a separate note, need some advice ladies. I have a co-worker who very generously gave me about 15 pieces of nice maternity clothing (jeans, dresses, shirts, skirts, etc). I am going to write her a thank you note. But I am wondering, is that enough? Or should I include a gift card or something?

kaitlinliz

I'm glad I'm not the only one who felt that way. I have enough info on fb..I like the bump cuz it is anonymous. @dragonfly87-2 I think a card is good enough. She did it to be kind and cuz she doesn't need them anymore, to help another mom out. I don't think she'd want/expect anything in return. 

bcashaw

@dragonfly87-2 i miss you too! 
I also find it hard/ annoying to keep up with FB and TB  and unfortunately Facebook has a better layout and works with less glitches for me. I also feel a lot safer with facebook, there are no drive bys or lurkers  
That being said , i do try to come here and i find myself lurking here more than participating.  

elmich3

Hello! My doctor just gave me a tetanus shot (ouch) forgot how much those hurt! And recommended I get a flu shot. I've never got a flu shot before. I'm not anti vaccines or anything but just weary of which ones to get. Are you all getting one?

elmich3

@dragonfly87-2. That is so nice! I'm sure she gave without expecting anything in return. With how expensive those clothes are, I'm sure it makes her happy just to know they are getting good use! A thank you card is very polite and appropriate. Going above & beyond with a gift card is obviously very nice but either way I think you're good.

DungeonTrollMel

@Lpyper33 I have to get a flu shot for work every year since I work in healthcare. I haven't gotten the flu in a while and never have issues with it. Sorry to tell you that tetanus will be sore for a few days. It's one of the worst

elmich3

@DungeonTrollMel Good to know, thanks!

And yeah, I have a big knot under my arm and sore.. as if I wasn't uncomfortable enough lol!

kaitlinliz

I've honestly only ever gotten the flu shot once and that was work related. My mom got it once and had the flu so she never got it again and never had us get it lol. It's the only one that she was never adamant about. I'm pro vaccine but couldn't get the HPV one due to health issues. I haven't decided if I'm gonna get the flu one or not. I feel like I should just cuz our babies will be born in Nov and I'm gonna make everyone get the tdap and recommend they get the flu as well especially since I'm having people stay with me n help out while DH is away ...I can't risk that.

DungeonTrollMel

Is anyone getting thank you gifts for shower hostesses? My MIL and SIL are throwing a shower when we are back in Canada in 2 weeks and I would like to do something for them. I got them each and Alex and ani bracelet but feel like I need to do more. SIL is breastfeeding still so she isn't drinking wine or anything. Any other good ideas?

mymulligan

@Lpyper33 I've never had the flu and never had the flu shot. I am pro-vaccine but that's one I just never felt was necessary. My dr didn't make me get one last pregnancy because I was so sick with hG. I'm on the fence about getting one this year just due to timing of due date and to protect baby. I am expecting the clinic to push it on me.  
@DungeonTrollMel I would definitely do a hostess gift, but I think the bracelets, along with a tboughful card, are more than enough! That is so kind of you!

DuchessOfCambridge

The reason we asked TB to remove FB group info was because we got randos coming out of the woodwork asking to join and it was getting to be too much. The group is secret on FB so it will never show up on your news feed. No one in the FB world will know you're in the group unless you tell them, aside from the group members. 

Flu shot - you cannot get the flu from the flu shot, it is inactive. If you get the flu, it means you would have gotten it anyway/you got a strain the flu shot does not protect against. Pregnant women are advised against the nasal spray flu vaccine because that IS made with a live (but weakened) virus. Every year the flu shot is designed to protect against the strains perceived to be highest threat, not all strains, which is why you could still get sick.  Infants and the elderly getting the flu can be extremely dangerous, so it's important for everyone else to get the shot to protect the more vulnerable groups through herd immunity. Women who get the flu shot while pregnant pass on immunity to their babies for at least a couple weeks after birth. Anyone meeting our baby before he's 6 months old will be required to have tdap as well as the flu shot. Because my kid's not the one I'm going to take chances on. 

NYTino24

Most offices will discuss the flu shot with you at 28 weeks. It is STRONGLY suggested. I'd never gotten the flu until a couple of years ago, and it knocked me down so badly until I was crying in the shower because I could not function. And I had a mild case! It can be deadly to your child. Even if this year's vaccine is only 1% effective, that's better than nothing.

NYTino24

@DungeonTrollMel I got my sister a makeup pallet that came with a free brush set (crazy good deal considering the free set was valued at $88 and I spent $25 on the pallet) at Ulta Beauty. She is spending a lot of time and money on our shower and she always plays with my products when she's at my house, so I thought it would be perfect.

NYTino24

@dragonfly87-2 Maybe a small Dunkin Donuts gift card would be nice...

NYTino24

I don't know why people are worrying about the FB group. We've gotten some newer members who have started to become more active. Now all we need to do is interact and create interesting opportunities for discussion. I don't want to sound mean, but I know I personally am putting a lot of effort into keeping things going and seeing people mourn the loss of members who have gone elsewhere isn't helping. I do interact with other members elsewhere and I'm still active here. It is possible to do both if someone wants to. That being said, I don't blame anyone for not posting here and have noticed the absence of some members. But if they don't want to be here, please don't keep begging them to come back.

jess0211

@dragonfly87-2 I am trying to check in on both when I can! I miss you ladies! For some reason TB app stopped working on my phone about a week ago and I haven't had a chance to figure out how to fix it. I will try to get better about popping in over here more though!

jess0211

Regarding the flu shot, both DH and I have to get it every year for work anyway. But I know it's highly recommended for pregnant women and anyone who will be around baby early on.

MaximumEffort

For the flu shot, the flu season has ended. Yay for me at work because the stupid reminder stops popping up every time I open a patients chart who hasn't gotten the flu shot.  

mymulligan

@NYTino24 you've done an awesome job keeping this board going! Thank you!

littlemissc17

@cwalker042 Go girl! Look at you getting stuff done! 

@NYTino24 I agree with @mymulligan that you've done great at getting things moving on TB again. I think it's picked up in the last couple of weeks. I understand what people mean when they talk about missing some of the people who moved over, just because we were starting to get to know them, enjoyed their perspectives and funny banter and now we don't interact with them anymore. I'm personally totally fine with it and respect people's decisions to do whatever they want. I am enjoying getting to know some of the newer people and if some of the lurkers (you know who you are!) would start posting and participating, I think it would add to the discussions even more. 

DungeonTrollMel

@NYTino24 I have lurked this board since it openned and you are Doing a great job keeping things going. I am glad there are people here still interacting. It's actually nice to have an intimate group and not a giant drama llama like some other BMBs full of drive bys and randoms. 

mariposa_767s

NYTino24 said:

I don't know why people are worrying about the FB group. We've gotten some newer members who have started to become more active. Now all we need to do is interact and create interesting opportunities for discussion. I don't want to sound mean, but I know I personally am putting a lot of effort into keeping things going and seeing people mourn the loss of members who have gone elsewhere isn't helping. I do interact with other members elsewhere and I'm still active here. It is possible to do both if someone wants to. That being said, I don't blame anyone for not posting here and have noticed the absence of some members. But if they don't want to be here, please don't keep begging them to come back.

You've done a great job keeping the board active.  I can only speak for myself, but I've been exhausted so I lurk more than I comment.  I'd say I even do that in the FB group.  The only difference is that the FB app works better on my phone and I'm typically on there anyway.  I love seeing the new people in the group over here, so it's almost like two totally separate groups.  At this point, people here shouldn't worry about the FB group since this group is building with newer members.  This could be (and is) a good group.  I personally get frustrated by the public platform here.  I know some prefer the anonymity but that causes me anxiety sometimes which is probably why I lurk more than I post.  Plus the long running scripts and glithiness of this site can really do my head in when trying to post something.  That could be why some don't post as well.  Nonetheless, this is a good group, so keep it up.

NYTino24

I'm not trying to take credit or to upset anyone. I just can't sustain it much longer, especially since I go back to work soon, and want people to realize that some members don't intend on coming back (like deleted themselves from the spreadsheet and all) and that should just be accepted. It's like when your bf breaks up with you and says you can still be friends. He doesn't mean it and isn't coming back!!! He's probably laughing at thinking that he is! (And really not the same situation / no ill will towards anyone, but accept it and move on.)

I was on another BMB a few months before this one and they just had their babies or are having them now and they are still active on TB, even though some are juggling both the BMB and FB group. My first baby was due in 6 days from now and I bonded more with some of them in 4 weeks than some people here in 7 months. I'm also in a private group with less members than here, but we truly know each other and have supported each other through the loss of a spouse and several babies including my own, surgeries, dealt with traumatic births and problems breast feeding, bad family members, the loss of jobs, etc. I know that some of my reaction is personal. But it's not about quantity of members, it's about quality. It's just tiring when people dump their info in check ins and don't seem to interact much with others and then complain about others, especially when this is a really emotional time for me.

dragonfly87-2

@NYTino24 I wasn't trying to say the board wasn't still going or wasn't happy other people haven't joined. I was just commenting that posters that were regulars seemed to disappear and it was a bit of a bummer. I understand everyone has their preferred places and I don't plan to beg anyone to come back, but I also think it's ok to recognize it's sad to see some go since I knew some before being pregnant.

ETA: I should add, definitely noticing an uptick in activity thanks to the posts you are doing and the new members joining. It slowed down for a few weeks, but nice to see new threads and discussions picking up.

NYTino24

@dragonfly87-2 Trust me when I'm not mad or directing this at anyone. This topic has come up several times on several threads over the last few weeks. I've also tagged some people I used to interact with in posts recently, specifically some PGAL ladies, because I'm generally concerned and hope everything is okay. That's different, though, because they disappeared without saying where they were going or why. Either way, I'm just saying it's pushing me away personally. Plus, like I said, I can't keep this up when school starts. Sometimes you'll notice me start a thread and disappear because I'm busy, but I try to come back to it, even if it's a few days later.