Weekly questions 7/30

bb3vj3n

Hey all,

Nobody created this thread this week so I thought I'd go ahead and get it started. Post your questions below!

bb3vj3n

so I'll kick this off..

Q1 - is it too early for one of those pregnancy pillows? I find it very difficult to get comfortable at night and I know so many people that swear by these ...I just feel like it might be a little strange to get one before I'm even showing?

Q2 - Any mom's to be under 30 that are opting in for pre natal testing? my OB was telling me today that ultimately it is my choice but that he recommends it....I just don't really think it's necessary as I'm healthy and have no history of any genetic conditions on my side of the family (and neither does my husband).

historeliza

My OBGYN wants me to completely take myself off of Celexa.  My GP agreed as well.  I went from 40mg to 20mg, and am in the process of weaning myself off.  Has anyone else been advised the same?

chasingroygbiv

@bb3vj3n Yes, just under 30 and we are doing Mat21. My MFM recommends it, not because I have a higher risk (I'm high risk, but due to a blood clotting disorder) but just to be able to be informed should there be a diagnosis. At this point I don't think it's a bad idea *TW since we've just dealt with 3 consecutive losses with no reasoning behind them that we could find. 

becausescience

@bb3vj3n
1) I say it is time for a pregnancy pillow whenever you think it will help.  You could try putting a pillow between your legs if you don't want to go full pillow.  I also used two under my head to help with heartburn - but that was later on.
2) I'm exactly 30 and will do the NT scan.  Those results will inform any further testing decisions.

babybluu

@bb3vj3n
i think the right time to use a pregnancy pillow is whenever you feel like it  

bb3vj3n

@chasingroygbiv
 
from what I understand about testing options, the mat21 is non invasive right? my doc recommended this as well... I'm more concerned about if it actually came back positive. He asked if I'd be willing to do further (potentially invasive like an amnio) and I said I wasn't sure. he then said there is no point doing the preliminary tests if I have no intention of following up if the results are unfavorable.  


I didn't know how to answer that? so for now I believe we agreed on doing the mat21 and seeing where we go based on those results...I just wasn't expecting the conversation at my age (29) and wasn't prepared to give an answer. 

becausescience

@bb3vj3n I'm of the mindset knowledge is power.  If one of the tests indicated a high chance of something - you'll be better prepared for anything special needed during birth, right after birth, extra monitoring, etc.

bb3vj3n

@becausescience yes I agree. I just feel it's to early to commit to invasive testing considering I'm not high risk. he didn't push it to hard - but I felt like that was what he was asking me. Who knows, I'm super hormonal and seem to be blowing everything out of proportion these days. Perhaps I just read too far into something that was just a normal recommendation from an Ob. lol

runsoncoffee

@bb3vj3n I just pulled out my body pillow! I have the snoogle and it's great! Definitely not too early!

LiveNLove44

bb3vj3n said:

so I'll kick this off..

Q1 - is it too early for one of those pregnancy pillows? I find it very difficult to get comfortable at night and I know so many people that swear by these ...I just feel like it might be a little strange to get one before I'm even showing?

Q2 - Any mom's to be under 30 that are opting in for pre natal testing? my OB was telling me today that ultimately it is my choice but that he recommends it....I just don't really think it's necessary as I'm healthy and have no history of any genetic conditions on my side of the family (and neither does my husband).

I LOVE my snoogle. I don't think it's ever too early for a pregnancy pillow. Thinking about getting pregnant? Get a pregnancy pillow. TWW? Get a pregnancy pillow. Wife's pregnant? Get a pregnancy pillow. Friend is pregnant? Get her a pregnancy pillow and buy one for you, too. These things are life changers I'm all about a good body pillow, but the snoogle levels it up!

chasingroygbiv

@bb3vj3n It's blood work. Only thing is you want to find out what kind of coverage you'll have (if any) or it can be spendy. 

mamaloba816

@bb3vj3n, I agree with the others. It's never too early to use your maternity pillows. Last pregnancy, I never got a snoogle because they're massive. I used a body pillow and and a wedge. That worked well for me, but some of you ladies are making me want to go get a Snoogle anyway now.

We opted to do non-invasive genetic testing with our first. We did Harmony. For us, we just did it for piece of mind and we felt like we would rather know early. I suggest calling your insurance to verify cost before moving forward. We didn't do this and we were a little sticker shocked when we got the bill. 

JamieK1882

@vaewelch not on celebs, but I take Zoloft. I tried to cut it out cold turkey and the withdrawal was horrendous so I went back on. My usual dose was 75mg a day, but now I'm doing 25mg every other day. I'm a pharmacist, so I should know better. How are you handling the tapering of celexa?

JamieK1882

So I guess my question is if anyone else is currently taking Zoloft (sertraline)? It is supposedly one of the safest SSRIs in pregnancy, and my OB is leaving it up to me whether I want to take or not. I don't want to, but feel so awful without it.

runsoncoffee

@JamieK1882 I am not taking medication but I do have a friend who is pregnant that is staying on her medication. I believe it's also Zoloft. The hormones during and after pregnancy are so crazy that if it helps you and your doctor thinks it's safe, I'd highly recommend staying on it! It doesn't make you a bad mom to stay on it, in fact I think  it makes you a good mom because you value taking care of yourself!  Perhaps if it would make you feel better you could talk to your doctor about a lower dosage?

wisewitch222

@bb3vj3n Personally, I wouldn't commit to any invasive screening absent any risk factors (and didn't during my last pregnancy when I was 26), but the practice I was at offered the completely non-invasive First Tri screening (ultrasound to check nuchal translucency and finger poke test), so I had it.  It carried no risk, and was covered, so why not? 

historeliza

@JamieK1882 The jump to 20mg sucked but I've balanced out.  I'll see my OBGYN on Friday and see what she says.  It is a class C drug. 

Kristi4938

@JamieK1882 I am on Zoloft and my OB actually just increased my dose from 50mg to 100. He is very confident that it's safe and I trust him so have no issues at all staying on it (or increasing). My last pregnancy I weened off the first trimester and it was soooo hard. I stayed on it the rest of my pregnancy and my little girl is perfect in every way. Trust yourself and your doc. A happy momma is so important. 

mdfarmchick

@JamieK1882 I am on Zoloft as well but have been on the minimum dose since I started it in April--25 mg. My PCM prescribed it knowing we were TTC and said it was safe to take during pregnancy. I am seeing a new OB today and we will see what he says. 

ETA: Would anyone be interested in started a mental health check in for those of us dealing with anxiety or depression, etc. ??

isntthatspeshul

Is anyone on diclegis? How is it working for you and are you crazy tired to the point of not being able to function? I'm desperate for some relief from this constant nausea that keeps me from eating and sleeping, but the side effects I'm reading are scaring me.

KristinUM12

*TW* loss mentioned in question.

I am part of a close knit mom's bible study that meets regularly. We talk about a ton of personal stuff, including next baby plans (all of us new moms in the past year) during our get together's. The day after I had my BFP, one of them sent out an email to the group sharing that she had just had a miscarriage...she would have been due within a week of when I am due. Because we share so much personal stuff, there's not way I can keep this pregnancy from the group for much longer. Between the morning sickness and needing my friends to be able to help watch DS for appointments, and the fact that I would feel much worse if I straight out lied that my periods are gone, they would figure it out. I just don't know how to go about it...I'd like to tell my friend first, obviously, but how do i do that? Has anyone had this experience before from either side and could share some wisdom with me? I want to be as sensitive to what she's experiencing as possible, but I also really can't not share with my closest friends much longer. Telling the other ladies but not her is not an option, I feel like that would probably be much worse.

runsoncoffee

@KristinUM12 I am in a similar situation in that I have a close friend struggling with infertility that I need to share the news with sooner than later. After seeking advice from others and hearing other things she has said I have decided I will be sharing with her via text message. I know this might sound funny but most of our communication is texting and we see each other about once a month along with a third friend. I felt it was more appropriate to give her the space to react on her own without feeling badly. I plan to leave further conversation up to her and won't be talking about my pregnancy unless she asks or brings it up. (If other ladies on here think I should be doing something differently I am open to hearing input). It's a tough spot for you especially since your due date will be a reminder of her loss. Good luck! 

amylonghorn

Ok ladies - trying to get back into the BMB and I feel like there are 84729294 new acronyms since I was in the O15 group!! I've done a search for acronyms and a chart was referenced...if someone could point me to that, it would be much appreciated!! Then maybe I'll sound like I know what I'm talking about when I post!

heatherdubrow

@KristinUM12 as someone who has struggled with infertility and MC I really appreciated when my friends sent me a text or email ahead of time. Like 'just wanted to give you a heads up, I'm pregnant and may announce it at the next get together. I wanted you to know first'. It allowed me time to cry and grieve for myself while saving face and texting back 'congrats!' Then the next time I saw them I could express genuine happiness for them.

chasingroygbiv

@KristinUM12 I went through this exact thing with my first loss, but with a very close friend. She knew I had miscarried and was waiting for my D&C and she sent out a mass group text with her positive pregnancy test. Just don't be that guy. I would tell her and only her at first to let her feel how she's going to feel. Explain that you wanted her to know, but you wanted to be careful of her feelings during such a difficult time. 

mintea

Q1 - Girrrl I've used mine even when not pg.

Q2 - I am >30 but with my prev pgs I was <30 and didn't get it.

Q3 - I just got out of kindergarten orientation for older DD and I am feeling annoyed already at the teacher. Her one handout with instructions to parents has 5 bullets and one of them is that girls need to wear shorts under any skirts or dresses. We do that anyway but something about that being what the teacher chose to put on the handout is really ticking me off. Maybe I'm just hormonal. Would that bug you? 

heatherdubrow

@mintea I think that's a pretty standard thing for kindergarteners since they're sitting cross cross apple sauce and probably climbing at recess. If she had said 'so as not to distract the boys' I would be annoyed! 

missydallas

chasingroygbiv said:

@KristinUM12 I went through this exact thing with my first loss, but with a very close friend. She knew I had miscarried and was waiting for my D&C and she sent out a mass group text with her positive pregnancy test. Just don't be that guy. I would tell her and only her at first to let her feel how she's going to feel. Explain that you wanted her to know, but you wanted to be careful of her feelings during such a difficult time. 

Really? As someone who has been there, that breaks my heart for you. What a jerk.

@kristinum12 - I think @heatherdubrow and @chasingroygbiv put it perfectly - letting her know ahead of time in a private setting (text, email, etc) is the best way to handle. You can't stop your life because someone suffered a loss, but you can try your hardest to be as gentle as you can with your exciting news. 

pbtoast

JamieK1882 said:

So I guess my question is if anyone else is currently taking Zoloft (sertraline)? It is supposedly one of the safest SSRIs in pregnancy, and my OB is leaving it up to me whether I want to take or not. I don't want to, but feel so awful without it.

I'm on zoloft and will continue through my pregnancy. Both my OB and my psychiatrist ok-ed it so I feel generally comfortable with it. 

garnetmama

@isntthatspeshul I am using unisom/b6 which is basically the same as diclegis. My OB prescribed diclegis but it was $$$ with my insurance so she recommended this first and it's working. I was never too tired to function although I was definitely tired the first week. Now I don't feel that it's affecting me so you will probably find you adjust!

pbtoast

isntthatspeshul said:

Is anyone on diclegis? How is it working for you and are you crazy tired to the point of not being able to function? I'm desperate for some relief from this constant nausea that keeps me from eating and sleeping, but the side effects I'm reading are scaring me.

I took it for a short time with my last pregnancy. I was tired but able to function. I was actually working FT at that time and able to manage. 

justkeeptrying

@KristinUM12, what the other ladies have already said is exactly what I would say. A good friend of mine announced her pregnancy at MY party in MY house. Although I was happy for her, I had to go cry in the bathroom as I was still grieving my own MMC. 

Telling them ahead of time will give them the space and time they need to grieve privately. They WILL be happy for you. They just might not be able to show it in the same way. 

Also, acknowledging that this is hard for them. You mentioned this is someone in your bible study group. So you could add that you are continuing to pray for her as well. It's hard when the rest of the world has moved on from your MC, and you haven't. It's nice to know others are still grieving with you. 

KristinUM12

@scoogy19  @heatherdubrow @chasingroygbiv @missydallas @justkeeptrying

Thank you ladies for your advice. I will keep this in mind...it's such a hard situation to be in, I'm so excited to share my pregnancy but know I need to be gentle and thoughtful with how I do it. 

Also, @chasingroygbiv  @justkeeptrying  I seriously cannot believe your friends did that to you!!!! I'm so sorry. I promise you that I will not be "that person".

mdfarmchick

@mintea @heatherdubrow not this again!! Jk. Yeah. What @heatherdubrow said. My sister is a K teacher and I know she just reminds parents because they don't always think about the criss cross applesauce and other things that K kids do all the time.

bookishbaker

@KristinUM12 One thing I'll add- my SIL and I were pregnant together until I had a MC. Afterwards, everyone pretty much avoided talking about her pregnancy around me, I'm sure intending to be sensitive but in reality it hurt a little because I still wanted to be part of her life. 

Of course, people handle loss differently and your friend may need to distance herself from your pregnancy, but I'd suggest that you keep in mind that's not always the case! I absolutely agree with the heads up text to let her know, though. 

KristinUM12

@bookishbaker Thank you. Since she's part of the group I know it will be impossible to avoid talking about my pregnancy around her, so that's very helpful to know. Knowing her, I'm pretty certain that she will be very gracious and very excited...and will want to be kept in the loop. I just feel bad, it's so tough to really know.

GG620

@KristinUM12 mirroring what @heatherdubrow @chasingroygbiv @missydallas @justkeeptrying @scoogy19  have said about a nice heads up text message. I also think the idea of adding in that you are praying for her is a nice sentiment and I'm sure would be greatly appreciated. As someone who struggled with losses and infertility I wish that people woukd have given me a heads up text so I could be prepared when they announced it in person in a group setting.

KristinUM12 said:

I just feel bad, it's so tough to really know.

I think its important here to highlight that the best thing might just be to ask her. Loss is a very tough thing, and I know for many people they are unsure how to approach others who are dealing with a loss. Being that you are in a prayer group with her it might actually be nice to be that person who she can talk to. Ask her if she wants to hear about your pregnancy updates or would it help her heal if you keep it minimal. Of course you should be happy and excited for your pregnancy and I am sure she will be too, but communication can be a wonderful, healing thing. 

PS - thank you for taking the time to consider your friend's feelings in this tough time and congrats on your pregnancy ☺

babybluu

@KristinUM12 I just recently went through this with a friend who is struggling to get pregnant. It's been a few years off and on and I'm not entirely sure if she's been Diagnosed with IF yet, but I was so nervous to tell her. I ended up messaging her (we live far away and don't talk on the phone) and she was actually really excited. Either that or she did well at faking it. I realize not everyone will be genuinely excited but I just tried to tell her gently, and not be over the top. 

babybluu

Can any STM+ tell me when your morning sickness got better? I feel like it was 15 weeks with DD but I'm just so desperate for any positive answers 

mdfarmchick

@babybluu it was between 17-18 weeks with DS. Sorry.