UO Thursday 5/25

vflux33

@doxiemoxie212 I think there's a HUGE difference between kids who use screens for creativity, and kids who are given screens to placate them when they're acting up. The thing is, like @lulu1180 and @izza2, my experience seeing my nephew has been parents shoving a screen at him when he acts up (and he knows he will get it and is being little kid type manipulative in order to get it). He's not being creative on it--he's playing games made by corporations who want to sell kids more games. If he was using it for anything remotely related to enrichment/creativity, I wouldn't be so concerned. Unfortunately, although I do think that type of enrichment is absolutely possible, from what I've seen, most (but NOT ALL) of the time screens are used to shut kids up and they are losing not only conversational skills, but as izza2 said, the ability to learn patience through occasional boredom. I've seen several parents, my sister included, who admit to and occasionally celebrate or have a laugh about using it for this purpose. That said, if the screen time is targeted for enrichment, learning, etc. I do think that's cool and I see how it could become more useful in our admittedly screen-centric world. 

garnetandgoldgrace

@pebbledam - I don't keep cards. I don't even really like them. I think they are a waste of money and I rather have something hand written like a letter. 

@grnmtnmama -- LOL. That's me. I have an annual pass to WDW and constantly theme my outsits. I "disney bound" and even have ears to match different rides. And personalized buttons. Whatever. Disney is my happy place.

pebbledam

@shortstack930 - FWIW, I think you're doing screen time the right way. No judgment. Like what @vflux33 said, I just seriously hate giving a kid a tablet or phone to placate them in public (or at home, really).

izza2

vflux33 said:

@doxiemoxie212 I think there's a HUGE difference between kids who use screens for creativity, and kids who are given screens to placate them when they're acting up. The thing is, like @lulu1180 and @izza2, my experience seeing my nephew has been parents shoving a screen at him when he acts up (and he knows he will get it and is being little kid type manipulative in order to get it). He's not being creative on it--he's playing games made by corporations who want to sell kids more games. If he was using it for anything remotely related to enrichment/creativity, I wouldn't be so concerned. Unfortunately, although I do think that type of enrichment is absolutely possible, from what I've seen, most (but NOT ALL) of the time screens are used to shut kids up and they are losing not only conversational skills, but as izza2 said, the ability to learn patience through occasional boredom. I've seen several parents, my sister included, who admit to and occasionally celebrate or have a laugh about using it for this purpose. That said, if the screen time is targeted for enrichment, learning, etc. I do think that's cool and I see how it could become more useful in our admittedly screen-centric world. 

^wss

I agree that there is a difference between using a tablet to placate a child and using it for educational purposes. I'm fully aware they use computers and tablets to help teach in school. I'm fully supportive of that. For me the distinction is when a parent uses it as a soothing mechanism, or to distract a kid who's throwing a tantrum, or just let's their kids sit on the games every waking moment.
@shortstack930 You monitor screen time and don't let your LO sit on the tablet all day every day. DSS has a leap pad, he's allowed to use it during car rides for long trips, and up to half an hour a day, after homework, reading, and playing with interactive toys first. He doesn't even touch it 99% of the time.
What you're doing is great, and I wish more parents were like that.


DSS's bio mother, on the other hand, wants to buy him a tablet and give him Internet access and let him free roam to do whatever he wants. She's very hands off and would rather they watch TV than bother her for anything.

pebbledam

@izza2 - I think that last tag is supposed to be for shortstack930? 

Also, we just found out that my DSS's mom has been giving him her phone to play on. I'm not sure how much time he spends on it or what sort of apps he's using, but he's 16 months old and we aren't thrilled about it. 

izza2

pebbledam said:

@izza2 - I think that last tag is supposed to be for shortstack930? 

Also, we just found out that my DSS's mom has been giving him her phone to play on. I'm not sure how much time he spends on it or what sort of apps he's using, but he's 16 months old and we aren't thrilled about it. 

Thanks, girl. I obviously need more coffee this morning.
 Ugh, 16 months is definitely too young to start placating with a screen.

grnmtnmama

For the record no judgment on screen time! My kid gets plenty of it but I agree that using it to placate or giving hours and hours of it can be more harmful than helpful. 

Also re: joint Facebook accounts I have seen it and I do unfriend when it is a situation where I'm only really friends with the wife. DNW random husband I don't really know also having access to my page. 

grnmtnmama

@garnetandgoldgrace I think being able to have an annual pass is so cool! I haven't been able to go since I was 12. Every time I try to plan a trip
it just seems so expensive!!! You are probably an expert at doing in affordably though. I know my friend with a pass is!

doxiemoxie212

@izza2 @vflux33 totally agree - we're on the same page. I was just trying to balance the "screens are always terrible" message I thought I was hearing, but you're right, screens aren't then "awesome" - they just have potential. I think parents need to find the middle ground of not accepting as is but also not entirely rejecting screens to get more of the educational/enrichment/creative options from developers. 

vflux33

@doxiemoxie212 Totally. I think as a society right now we're not making a great distinction between the possible uses of this technology: there is a lot of binary thinking going on and I agree screens are neither 100% good or bad and I wouldn't want any potential kid of mine to be "behind" other kids in school in terms of understanding how to use technology.  

In general I love the idea of producing something with new mediums, and that should definitely be celebrated through screens and otherwise. I just wish my nephew hadn't played hours and hours of Angry Birds before learning how to talk and seeing that made me want to be more protective with screens (as opposed to a full ban--though at 2 I say full ban personally). 

doxiemoxie212

@vflux33 yeah, totally, if a skill like language is lagging, playing Angry Birds, or any game like that, is not going to help. But I could totally see a really cool game that might actually improve language! It's a shame that kind of thing isn't what kids are actually using screens for 9 times out of 10. 

shortstack930

@izza2 @pebbledam I 100% agree! I can't stand when people give their kids screens to placate them. Absolutely teaching them the wrong thing. At that point they're just rewarding bad behavior. 

jsnakehole

My principal is obsessed with technology, but honestly, I don't feel like its benefiting my students. Sure, we have educational apps, and robots, and Booflix, and God knows what else, but my kids spend their whole day at home attached to screens. They need to be read books, and have conversations with each other and the adults, and to play make believe. Especially my English language learners

DH's first wife used to just pop her daughter in front of the TV or iPad instead of talking to her, so he's super anti-screens. I'm not totally against letting kids have some time with technology, but I feel like people forget there was a world before Apple took over... I say, typing on my iPhone.