I knew better.... {Mother's Day}

toesinthesand-2

Y'all I knew better. I told myself I was going to avoid social media today. I had wedding last night and always try to get a preview of images up for my clients the next day. I intentionally got up early to post their preview so I could avoid all the Mother's Day posts.

I would have been just a couple days shy of 12 weeks and today was the day we were going to announce to our families with Mother's Day gifts. I had cute mugs in my Etsy shopping cart for them, and couldn't bring myself to check out. I'm so glad I didn't because it was just a couple days later I went into the ER for my Ectopic. I'd be even worse if those things were sitting around my house.

I went out and helped DH in the yard this morning which kept my mind off things some. He went to run a couple of errands and when I checked my phone a friend had sent me a text to tell me she was thinking about me. The sentiment was sweet....but it was basically game over after that. I must be a glutton for punishment because I scrolled Facebook and Instagram anyway. Now I'm in bed crying. I knew this day would be hard, but it's so freaking miserable.

40momma

I'm right there with you @toesinthesand-2 I almost feel like I could have written that post myself. We planned to tell both of our mother's today as well, I would have been almost 11 weeks today. I also had a good friend (who knows all too well what I'm going  through, she had a still birth at 36 weeks) send me a similar text and it threw me over the edge, gasping for air and uncontrollable sobbing. I feel like I've cried harder today than I did when I found out. I sort of feel like before it was so many hormones and now this is just raw emotion, and it sucks. Curl up in bed, cry, have a warm cup of tea, take care of yourself and know that I am thinking of you, and all of the other women who have suffered through this as well

toesinthesand-2

@40momma - Yes I was holding it together until I got that text. That basically sent me over the edge. The icing on the cake is that I started my first period since the EP the day before yesterday. I was happy since it started, because I'd been waiting 5 dang weeks....but then reality hit and it just kept going downhill.

jackiesmom324

@40momma and @toesinthesand-2 sending you hugs.. Mother's day is soo tough when you've had a loss.. I can relate. Just trying to trudge through