Randoms - MAY! — The Bump
March 2017 Moms

Randoms - MAY!

Happy May, March Mamas!!!! 

Pregnancy Ticker
IloveAlbertkjd291MsTurney
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Re: Randoms - MAY!

  • So I finally experienced the blowouts you ladies have talked about and it was so random because there was hardly any in the diaper itself more so up his bum and back. I remember reading someone saying they rinsed LO out in the sink well that's what I did this morning. 

    BabyFruit Ticker
    MrsBinPA
  • I complained before about DH threatening to get a vasectomy and me not being sure about being done having babies, but last night we were watching a show and one the characters gave birth and I said "wow, glad I never have to go through that again!" And DH said "well, you never know".

    He also got upset when I threw away some soothie pacifiers because DD only likes the Mam brand. 

    Maybe he's starting to come around?
    datalover13ashley14598longliveregina
  • CbeanzCbeanz member
    250 Answers Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited May 2017
    @Ivorytower2 Stop at 2. Lol I'm not even kidding.

    We are seriously drowning over here. And that's even with preschool AND I haven't gone back to work yet! I'm not confident we will all survive the next 18 years.
    Ivorytower2datalover13LoboandSuperNinja
  • kjd291kjd291 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    Cbeanz said:
    @Ivorytower2 Stop at 2. Lol I'm not even kidding.

    We are seriously drowning over here. And that's even with preschool AND I haven't gone back to work yet! I'm not confident we will all survive the next 18 years.
    Shhhh. You'll be okay. This season is gonna pass. hugs.


    ashley14598
  • @Cbeanz sorry that you are having a hard time but like kjd291 it will get better. 
    @Ivorytower2 it took DH a while to come around for DS #4 but he did. He doesn't particularly like the newborn phase so that didn't help. 


    BabyFruit Ticker
  • I admit I'm not a fan of the newborn phase. Like at all. DH feels the same...I used to want 3 kids, now we're not even sure if we want a second....I know we both do actually want another one & will eventually try for a sibling for LO, but honestly some days (like today...it's been a very rough one) make me think hell no. Especially realizing just how much I actually hated being pregnant...it's not something I want to repeat anytime soon unfortunately. 
    Pregnancy Ticker
    datalover13
  • I'm not a big fan of the newborn stage either.  In some ways I'm struggling more with it the second time around.  I mean it was hard with my son too but I guess in a different way.   Looking back he was an "easier" baby after the first few weeks and I didn't know to appreciate it!  I'm feeling a little trapped...she hates the car seat and carrier so it's really hard to go anywhere.  Even to go on a walk is tough because she cries in the car seat when it's on the stroller.  I have several friends that had babies within a few weeks of me and they are always posting pictures on FB of their babies happily sitting in the car seat at restaurants, parties, church...I have to time my outings perfectly so that DD will fall asleep then I know I only have a certain window of time to hurry up and do something.  I keep repeating this line from a John Mayer song in my head "It's just a phase, it's not forever"  I'll just be happy when she's a little older and can be distracted and entertained by going places.  Moral of the story? We are definitely "two and through" so DH wins this one.  I thought I wanted three but no way!  I am going to get Mirena until DH gets snipped this summer. I will get my tiny baby fix by borrowing someone else's newborn and then getting to leave it with the parents and go home! Haha

    P.S. speaking of Mirena...I have read that it is safe for breastfeeding and that in very few cases women have reported it affecting milk supply but that's not medically proven.  Anyone have experience? 
  • kjd291kjd291 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    I'm not a big fan of the newborn stage either.  In some ways I'm struggling more with it the second time around.  I mean it was hard with my son too but I guess in a different way.   Looking back he was an "easier" baby after the first few weeks and I didn't know to appreciate it!  I'm feeling a little trapped...she hates the car seat and carrier so it's really hard to go anywhere.  Even to go on a walk is tough because she cries in the car seat when it's on the stroller.  I have several friends that had babies within a few weeks of me and they are always posting pictures on FB of their babies happily sitting in the car seat at restaurants, parties, church...I have to time my outings perfectly so that DD will fall asleep then I know I only have a certain window of time to hurry up and do something.  I keep repeating this line from a John Mayer song in my head "It's just a phase, it's not forever"  I'll just be happy when she's a little older and can be distracted and entertained by going places.  Moral of the story? We are definitely "two and through" so DH wins this one.  I thought I wanted three but no way!  I am going to get Mirena until DH gets snipped this summer. I will get my tiny baby fix by borrowing someone else's newborn and then getting to leave it with the parents and go home! Haha

    P.S. speaking of Mirena...I have read that it is safe for breastfeeding and that in very few cases women have reported it affecting milk supply but that's not medically proven.  Anyone have experience? 
    No experience with that one-but you can ask for the Paraguard.?
    that one is hormone free
  • Lol @Cbeanz! I'm sure it would be a hot mess with three. I'm thinking we'd only do it if we can swing an investment in a good live in nanny/housekeeper for a few years. What are you guys doing about child care with three so little?

    I feel like we're gonna be millionaires once these kids finally start kindergarden and we no longer have to pay for childcare.
    Cbeanzdatalover13
  • @IloveAlbert I had Mirena put in about 12 weeks post partum with DD, and we breastfed for 2 years with now issues at all. I'm sure it varies depending on the woman, but I maintained a very healthy milk supply, and at times after a growth spurt I would have a bit of an over supply. 
    IloveAlbert
  • CbeanzCbeanz member
    250 Answers Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its
    OMG the cost of 3 in daycare is insane. In my area it's about 40k/yr. Plus getting 3 out the door every morning is so hard, and the drop off and pickup take so long. You are right in getting in home care with a nanny.
    We are lucky that my mom is able to move in temporarily so we'll have 2 in daycare part time and keep the baby at home until she's a year old. So we'll only have 3 in daycare for about 6 months before DD1 starts kindergarten.

    Will you have 2 in daycare or are you thinking about a nanny with 2? @Ivorytower2
  • @IloveAlbert your baby sounds exactly like my first daughter. It was hell. She did love the ergo though- she'd fuss for maybe 5/10 mins but if I kept moving and bouncing she'd go to sleep and be calm and we could go anywhere/do anything with that carrier.  But then it would suck transferring her back to car seat to go home cuz she'd scream. Probably did this for the first 9/10 months and I really wanted to flip every time I saw parents with babies happily sleeping in their strollers or car seats. 

    At the the time I totally thought it was something I was doing wrong but now I realize it was 100% her personality. She was extremely pissed off as a baby, but now she's a very intelligent toddler.

    hang in there!!
  • @kjd291 I was thinking about asking about Paragaurd.  When I was at my 6 week PP appointment my OB mentioned it but then said he usually does the  Mirena.  Maybe I will ask again before I do it.

    Thanks @catybug820 ;
  • @IloveAlbert
    My son hates being in his car seat during walks for the most part (though he loves car rides). I found that if I pull out my phone and put on some soothing music for him (he absolutely loves Bob Dylan just like me), and then put my phone by his feet in the car seat he will relax and enjoy. He won't always fall asleep, but he will be quiet and content. This is the baby that normally wants to be held and walked around with. For some reason holding him and sitting isn't acceptable most of the time.
  • So good news: took a pregnancy test this morning and it came up negative. Looks like I'm, nauseated, tired, and my boobs are swollen and sore for absolutely no reason.  :D

    I'm going in soon to have an IUD put in, and they'll do a pregnancy test then. If my doctor's test comes up positive, I'm going to cry.
    kjd291
  • @Cbeanz your mom sounds like a gem! My mom lives nearby but she can barely take care of herself let alone my kids lol! DD1 is preeety high maintenence, so we decided it would be best to keep her in daycare full time. She needs the socialization and stimulation. We got a good hook up on a reasonable nanny for the baby for the hours we need. It's still like $2500/month for both, so if we did have a third this current baby would have to stay home with the nanny too for a while to make it affordable. It's like a second mortgage :(
  • Anyone know the generally accepted guidelines for being outside with baby? It's no longer chilly here and I'd love to spend more time outside but I'm not sure how long we can be out when it's in the 80s. 
    About us:
    Me - 28, Lean PCOS
    DH - 31
    Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
    Blog: ourbinarystar.com

    FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!

  • kjd291kjd291 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    Anyone know the generally accepted guidelines for being outside with baby? It's no longer chilly here and I'd love to spend more time outside but I'm not sure how long we can be out when it's in the 80s. 
    As long as baby is dressed light clothes, and in the shade-stay out for as long as you'd like!  General rule-if you're feeling fine temp wise, babies probably fine! 
    AandDM2014longliveregina
  • At the the time I totally thought it was something I was doing wrong but now I realize it was 100% her personality. She was extremely pissed off as a baby, but now she's a very intelligent toddler.


    I SO hope this is true for my little guy, haha. He's SO PISSED half of the day lately. At first I thought he seemed really relaxed, laid back. But that was just because he was so brand new. Now that he's waking up a little more to his life, he's pissed at any number of things and he's VERY willful. 

    serenity13
  • @jenny0228 my guy is the same!!! He's so angry half the time & constantly throws his little arms around & punches the air/himself/me if I'm holding him... hoping he'll grow into a calm boy eventually haha
    Pregnancy Ticker
    MsTurneyAandDM2014MrsBinPAjenny0228
  • DS also has his angry moments and oh does he get angry and he is very fussy and particular. DH likes to say that LO is swimming when h is throwing his arms around. 

    Daycare is ridiculous in price where I live as well and I only use it partime two days a week so I can't imagine how much it is for full time. My daycare for LO fell through so I am hoping that I can change my shift to a night time shift and or swap with people to work theirs nights and I'll just stay him as I have no desire or mental energy to try and find another daycare. 

    I've used the paraguard before and aside from heavier bleeding and sometimes painful cramps ( which I normally have ) it worked well. I did research the mirena and some people did states that it made their hormones wacky and their periods as well.  I have teonforends that had it and then had it taken it out for this reason but then on the other hand I've had friends who totally love it and feel nothing.  Since this was my fourth baby and fourth csection I got my tubes tied this time around (which I am still bummed about and mourning the fact that I won't be able to have more kids) 

    DS #3 is sick and is passing it around to everyone luckily LO has only had a runny nose and congested but it sounds terrible. 

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • @serenity13 @jenny0228 hugs guys. I'm sure that temperament isn't directly correlated to level of intelligence in all cases, but for my tough daughter, I think she was just smart beyond her baby abilities and was frustrated that she couldn't talk, walk, roll over or express herself. If you follow Wonder Weeks, the leaps were intensely difficult for us, but after each leap when she'd learn new skills she always seemed content for a while and you could see a tremendous change in her level of abilities. She's now 2.5 and speaks two languages, speaks in full paragraphs and is an extremely sensitive and empathetic little thing. She's still super strong willed though. I once read that the worst qualities in kids make the best qualities in adults, I I can definitely now see some of the positives in having such a strong-willed, curious and determined little girl.

    I know it doesn't make it easier during sleepless nights or hours of fussing, but just know there is a reason for this and some amazing things to come.
  • I also had a super fussy baby. He literally didn't smile until he was 6 months old. He was miserable and I cried a lot thinking he hated me. He started to get happier around six months but wasn't actually happy happy until we hit 1 year. He was also delayed on a lot of milestones. Wasn't rolling until he was 8 months, didn't crawl till 10 months, the smiling thing. He didn't start talking until he was 3. We found out he has autism but is high functioning. 

    Regardless some babies are fussy. I don't think it correlates to anything being wrong. But some babies definitely have that more strong willed personality in them. I think that's a trait that usually sticks around with them.

    Once they get to school I actually think it's a blessing. Other kids can be a bad influence and be mean or persuade your child into bad habits. The strong willed ones don't really take anyone else's crap and are usually more likely to keep the manners you taught them over the other kids. I've seen it a lot as I volunteer at my sons school for functions - the strong willed ones you rarely have to worry about. 
    Me: 32 DH: 34
    Baby #1 - January 2010
    Baby #2 - March 2017

     
    MrsBinPA
  • Thanks @ShannonJ96 I'll have to try that!

    @Ivorytower2  I hope someday she'll get used to the carrier.  Yes, everytime I see one of those posts I'm like, "What am I doing wrong!" Just tonight a girl who had her baby like a week before me posted a picture of her and the baby at the Yankees game!!! I can barely go to Target and she's at the Yankees game with her 9 week old and 19 month old! 

    Oh well, you know what they say "Well behaved women seldom make history" lets go with that!
  • I think my husband and I are separating. It's been a long time coming but it hurts my mama heart to have my son exposed to this madness. I have to do what is right for him. 

    I just can't believe I am having to make this decision with a 4 week old. 
  • @thisisallyson I'm so sorry to hear that your marriage is on the rocks right now. Do whatever feels right for your son. He needs two happy parents and that doesn't always mean together.
    Team Green turned Pink!
    Samantha - 4/5/2017

  • @thisisallyson I'm so sorry to hear you're going through that! 
  • @thisisallyson Sorry you are going through this at an already stressful time.  Creepy internet hugs! 
  • Thank you @RunBooRun @ashley14598 and @IloveAlbert. He and I have been struggling for some time and I am still trying to figure out what is best for all of us. But it seems more and more likely that we might need to separate for a while to figure out what we want to do. Not ideal, but it might be what is best for our family. If we end up back together, great. If we decide that we would be better off apart, then we will do what we need to do. 

    Heres to hoping for positive outcomes, whatever they may be. 
    RunBooRunAandDM2014serenity13ashley14598
  • @thisisallyson all the creepy internet stranger hugs to you.  I think your outlook on a very difficult situation seems really great.  Stay strong for your family and I hope things work out for the best,  whatever that may be.
    ****TW****

    Me: 39 DH: 40
    Married: 12/6/2014

    BFP#1: 1/20/15      MC: 2/14/15
    BFP#2: 10/28/15    MC: 11/24/15
    BFP#3:  3/20/16     MC: 4/26/16
    BFP#4:  7/15/16     DD: 3/18/17
    BFP#5:  5/1/18     EDD: 1/12/19
    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker


  • I'm guilty of not being on here nearly as much since joining the FB group but have to echo what others have said @thisisallyson - I'm so sorry you're going through such a difficult situation on top of an already exhausting & hard time....hope that you'll get some clarity during the period of separation & whatever the outcome is I hope things will work out for the best for you & your LO!! Sending lots of hugs!!❤
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • Thank you @MrsBinPA and @serenity13. This is why I loved the March mamas so much. You all are so supportive and it honestly brings tears to my eyes. 

    As for an update, I'm still here and we are still struggling. My husband has anxiety and OCD and it leads to a lot of paranoia at times. Then he pops a bunch of pills to calm down and sleeps all day. I honestly feel like a single mom who also has to take care of her husband because he demands so much. And it is getting so very overwhelming. Also, it worries me that he has such a low threshold for the baby when he cries. So then his tone changes and becomes very stern and of course the baby feeds off of that and cries harder. I'm worried that our plan of having DH watch the baby on his days off/the days I work isn't going to work out because he really doesn't know how to handle the baby when he's upset. 

    *sigh* I don't have a lot of people I can talk to. My family all lives out west so this would just stress them out because they can't really do anything to help. I feel so alone. 
    MrsBinPA
  • kjd291kjd291 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    @thisisallyson big hugs, mama. I'm sorry you feel so alone. Please keep sharing on here-even though it's not quite as nice as in real life friends/we're here!  

    I don't know exactly what it's like to be in your situation, but I do know from
    my own challenges how hard it is to feel like a single mama who's taking care of an extra kid with DH. And a husband who gets easily tense and frustrated with not knowing how to handle baby/but he has gotten sooooo much better with time. DD1 is now 1 1/2 and he's a million times a better dad then the first months. 

    Only advice I would give is give the situation time /things are especially hard these first months with a newborn, things get better, things get easier. Promise! 
  • npaulienpaulie member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    Whats everyone up to today?! It's soooo quiet!
    Pregnancy Ticker
  • Do you think it's so quiet because of the Facebook group aside from our busy lives taking care of LO'S ?

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • I personally find Facebook easier to use. 
    About us:
    Me - 28, Lean PCOS
    DH - 31
    Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
    Blog: ourbinarystar.com

    FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!

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