Family Bed/Cosleeping — The Bump
March 2017 Moms

Family Bed/Cosleeping

I know we have some cosleeping mamas in this group, and lately I've noticed that this new baby sleeps much better when she's in bed with me.
Im pretty familiar with the "best practices" for co-sleeping, but had a few questions:

1) If you have a toddler or older child who still wants to sleep with you occasionally, how do you keep the baby safe? How do all four people fit in the bed?

2) Does co-sleeping make it more difficult to eventually transition baby to a crib? At what point would it become harder to do that? I'm happy to co-sleep now if she's comforted by if, but would like her to at least start her night in her own bed at some point.

Thanks wise ladies!

Re: Family Bed/Cosleeping

  • So glad you posted this!  My LO sleeps right now in her swing or on us on the couch (not the safest but I sleep so lightly when she's on me so I feel ok about it).  I know she won't sleep in her bassinet/crib anytime soon but I am starting to bring her into the bed sometimes in the morning or when no one else is there (DS is at school). We didn't start out bedsharing because she is so loud with her grunting and such since she's so gassy.  Also, she had trouble with nursing side lying and that's really one of the best things about co-sleeping!  We co-slept with DS from about 6 months to 4 and a half when he got his "big boy room".  Now he falls asleep in his bed then comes to the "big bed" at some point in the night most nights.  I figure if he stays next to my husband and I have baby on the other side of me that's safest.  The only problem with that is switching sides to nurse in the middle of the night.  I always just switched DS from one side of me to the other.  I never mastered the leaning the boob over to get the other side ...always felt like DS would suffocate on my boob! We have a kind size so I think we'd fit ok.  Just also wondering if anyone has experience with older sibling in bed with baby as well. 
  • @IloveAlbert so your toddler would be next to the wall, then baby between you and DH? 
  •  No...I think DS between me and DH and baby on the other side of me...away from DH and DS.
    Ivorytower2
  • 1) you keep yourself between toddler and baby-never letting them sleep next to eachother.  We haven't had it work--DD1 will come into bed to calm down and then we bring her back to her own room because she gets too excited about having baby in bed too.

    2) DD1 co-slept with me till about 6mo?? (I think) maybe a bit sooner or later. Then we started putting her down with a routine for bed in her crib and when she woke to nurse at night for the first time I'd bring her in to bed with me again. ((More for my comfort and convenience cuz side lying nursing is the Bomb! Hah). and whenever she had regressions or issues sleeping DH and I agreed it was fine for her to be in with us--at some point  around her 1st birthday, she just started sleeping better in her crib. If we tried to bring her in with us, she would play instead of sleep and want to sleep in her own room. 
    sooo-for us that gradual process really worked! She's 20mo now and sleeps through the night and naps in her own room, and maybe once a week at most will wake up crying but can be comforted and put back in her own bed.  We now still have a "family bed" in the sense that if she wants in and will sleep, we won't say no. 
    Ivorytower2
  • @kjd291 that's helpful, thanks. So you would have maybe husband then toddler then you then baby next to wall? We can push our bed up against the wall, but the other edge would still be open so Id be scared for my toddler to be up against the edge. I guess that would work but also means me and DH don't get to sleep next to each other argh
  • @kjd291 that's helpful, thanks. So you would have maybe husband then toddler then you then baby next to wall? We can push our bed up against the wall, but the other edge would still be open so Id be scared for my toddler to be up against the edge. I guess that would work but also means me and DH don't get to sleep next to each other argh
    Yep!! That's the set up we currently have. Bed pushed against wall and baby on the edge.
  • I know we have some cosleeping mamas in this group, and lately I've noticed that this new baby sleeps much better when she's in bed with me.
    Im pretty familiar with the "best practices" for co-sleeping, but had a few questions:

    1) If you have a toddler or older child who still wants to sleep with you occasionally, how do you keep the baby safe? How do all four people fit in the bed?

    Toddler between parents, baby outside of mom. We don't anymore :( We need a king sized bed!

    2) Does co-sleeping make it more difficult to eventually transition baby to a crib? At what point would it become harder to do that? I'm happy to co-sleep now if she's comforted by if, but would like her to at least start her night in her own bed at some point.

    My son napped in his crib...that kept it a familiar place. But at about 9 months I moved him to a double mattress on the floor because he was beating us up with his brace. This allowed me to cosleep part Of the night and sleep with my husband the rest. Instead of him coming to My bed, I just went to his. Again, this might be because if his brace--hes not really mobile at night. My husband still cosleeps if he wakes up in the motn or at the end of the night (like 4ish to 6) to keep him in bed longer. So yes....once you commit to cosleeping at first, it becomes your way of nighttime parenting. 

    Thanks wise ladies!

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • I'll add baby next to walk works for lots of families but I get freaked out by the idea of them being wedged between mattress and wall. I've never actually heard of it happening to a real person, but I can picture it in my head. My ideal situation would be a king mattress on a platform in the floor. 
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Ivorytower2Ivorytower2 member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Third Anniversary Photogenic
    edited April 2017
    Thanks @longliveregina. We gave in and bought a king size. It arrived last week, but on the foundation and bed frame it's terrifyingly high and of course the safety rail now doesn't fit the bigger bed. So far it's been wall, baby, me with DH and DD sleeping in the guest room.
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