Hi Ladies (introduction... TW recent late term loss)

harleyquinn0621

hello ... My name is Cyndie I am 35 years old... DH & I spent many years NTNP and finally got serious about TTC April 2016....

**TW**
we got our BFP 01/01/2017  and were so excited... unfortunately at our Anatomy Scan last week we found my cervix had opened 3 cm and and after performing an amnio found an infection had set in the amniotic fluid.... due to the infection my high risk OB would not place a cerclage. My options were to either induce (we were 19 weeks 1 day along) knowing my son would not make it, or let it go knowing it would happen on it's own eventually however he advised the infection was severe and doing this would most likely lead to me losing my uterus. We induced that night, the most painful experience mentally, emotionally and physically I have ever been through. Our son Alexander was born, we spent some time with him and we will be having him cremated 

DH immediately said he wanted to try again as soon as it is safe for me to physically... this is all just happened 04/13 so of course we aren't actively trying yet (probably won't be cleared for sex for a few more weeks) but i'm trying to do as much as i can to preplan now. 

when we got our BFP we had actually been taking a break from TTC- we had done an HSG 3 months prior and were planning on starting IUI's with injectables, 

I plan on going back to the same RE i was seeing because I loved her, asking her to repeat the HSG to make sure nothing during all this has damaged my tubes and then moving forward with the IUIs w/ injectables .... I do worry about my age... i'm 35 and will be 36 in November but i'm hoping we can be successful again and this time carry to term

KLake42

I'm so sorry for your loss-- I can't imagine how difficult that experience must have been for you.

vlagrl29

Ugh I'm so sorry about your loss. I had a CP in December. Don't worry about your age. I'm 36 and have a 6 year old and I'm sure we will conceive again. You were able to get pregnant and you will again. Check out the TTCAL board if you haven't already.

SP128

So sorry for your loss. I'm 36. Fx that everything gets back to "normal" quick

harleyquinn0621

Thank you ladies. My hope is that because I was able to become pregnant we know my body can..... and the baby was healthy my cervix  failed..... now that we know this is a problem we can hopefully get pregnant again and just take the proper precautions 

i know now it seems soon to be planning to ttc again but it gives me something hopeful to look at instead of just the intense grief I feel....I can never replace Alexander, nor would i want to... it's a really weird place emotionally to be 

amberruka

I'm so sorry @harleyquinn0621. I also hold on to the fact that I was able to get PG at 37, hopefully I will again. Be kind to yourself, and join us on TTCAL if you like (we have a benched thread if not actively TTC....but the TTC35+ is pretty cool, too! :-))

harleyquinn0621

Thank you @amberruka I'll pop in over there

vlagrl29

@harleyquinn0621 - you can totally get pregnant again. You have to keep the hope going. I have a friend that had to have her cervix sewn closed for most of her pregnancy and bed rest. Then it was opened back up near her due date.

katekate628

@harleyquinn0621 I am so sorry for your loss, how difficult that must have been. Hoping for success for you in your TTCAL journey. 

Momifbysea

@harleyquinn0621 I can't imagine going through that loss, I am so very sorry for that. You are incredibly strong and I welcome you here with open arms! It's a wonderful group, truly. I look forward to seeing your updates on our weekly thread.