Met my great nephew for the first time, and probably overstepped a few lines.

SraMitt

So my niece (19 years old) had her son 5 weeks ago.  I finally got to meet him this past weekend.  She mentioned several times how he is a super fussy baby.  He seemed fine, but I hadn't been there long. A little bit later he was hungry so she went to make him a bottle..... with tap water.   Mind you it wasn't her house so not even tap water that the baby was used to..  *We were at my parents house*.  I know i'm a few years out of the loop with my youngest being 5, but I've always believed that tap water was a nono.  So... I asked her if she had ever tried getting distilled or infant water.   She said no.  I also noticed that she was adding rice to his bottles. . 5 weeks old.  I made an excuse to leave and went and bought her 10 gallons of infant water, more formula, and a pack of diapers. (she doesn't work and her BF is kinda flakey on working so I just did it as a gift.    Really hoping that switching to the infant water will result in him having less tummy troubles. She didn't seem upset with me, but I know how I feel with people tell me what to do with my kids..  Oh well.   (Ohh. I should also add that in the 4 hours I was there, I believe she gave him like 5 bottles. All with rice added in*   

natleilynn

I think you did the best thing you could, under the circumstances. You didn't get judge-y on her, you just gifted her some things you thought would help. If she got upset because of that (which it sounds like she didn't) then you'd just know next time to tread more carefully. It's hard to stand by when you see someone handling babies in a way you don't agree with, but if her doctor(s)/family aren't able to better educate her or convince her, it's going to be tough either way.

I mean, I would never complain about someone gifting me all those things

mrs_fogue

I think you did what was best.  Maybe follow up with her and see if it helped him any.  It's hard dealing with new moms who aren't educating themselves on raising their baby, especially when they are relying on their parents for info which is 20+30 year old information.  Dealing with this myself with the SIL. 

jessafishy

I agree with the PPs. It was a very thoughtful thing for you to do and I hope she realizes that maybe she needs to do a little more research outside of what she is getting so far. Hopefully it helps the poor babe's tummy! 

MamaStreeter

These situations are so hard! I think you did what was best. I try my best to not judge other moms, but certain situations I have a *really* hard time ignoring. Particularly car seat safety, and I'd have trouble watching her feed babe rice cereal at that age!! I know everyone is different but I hardly make any big decisions about raising my son without consulting research. I think you did what you could!  

joforyoga

Adding rice cereal into bottles eeeeew. She may be only getting advice from her older generation family members? I think it's fine that you offered some other ideas:)

buttercream_frosting

I think you did well. I would've struggled to not have said anything about the rice cereal part. Hopefully the tap water is clean in those areas and hasn't made the baby sick.

SLCC?

I think it's awesome that you helped out by purchasing supplies! The rice would bother me. My kids both had tap water bottles, from whatever house we were at, and they were both fine with it, so that wouldn't have bothered me as much. 

KDeola

OMG, the rice cereal has me cringing!  I think you handled it as best as you could and actually held your tongue pretty well.  

baker1jm2

I think you have good intentions...we always used tap water in DDs bottles but ours is really good.  Could the baby have reflux? My friend had to add rice cereal to her sons bottles bc he puked up everything