Babies on the Brain

Waiting Room Wednesday- March 29

***General TW that this thread might contain discussions mentioning MC and loss.***

Welcome to Waiting Room Wednesday!
You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on not TTC and connect with others who are in the same boat. TTC can be a long journey, and having to wait makes it feel even longer -- even if it is for a good reason. I invite you to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say. Treat this like an ongoing conversation.

Benched = involuntarily not NTNP/TTC and "out of the game," usually due to medical reasons
TTA = avoiding pregnancy by using protection or FAM, usually for non-health-related reasons __________________________________________________________________ 

Are you benched or TTA? 

What brings you here? 

How long do you think you'll be here? 

How have things been going?

Any R/R?

GTKY: If money didn't matter, where would you live?

Re: Waiting Room Wednesday- March 29

  • Hey @AllyTheKid! I started hanging around more recently but saw your name in some older post. Glad you decided to come back! I'm sorry about the Nexplanon! That sounds pretty terrible. I stay on continuous hormones for endometriosis so I never get periods. If I miss a pill or have pregnancy symptoms I always think I'm pregnant and don't know it because I don't have periods to miss. It's a total mind game. I bought some cheap pregnancy tests to have in the house for those moments and it helps keep me sane. Regardless, hope you are able to find some clarity for what is best for your family. 

    On our way to baby #2!
    BabyFetus Ticker
    EDD March 12, 2018

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  • Are you benched or TTA? TTA  

    What brings you here? Waiting for my husband to be ready for another baby.

    How long do you think you'll be here? Hopefully just a couple months.

    How have things been going? All is good here. I will probably broach the TTC subject again tonight since our daughter won't be home and we can talk without interruption. It's been a month since I brought up another baby. At that time we had only been back in our house a couple weeks, he was thinking of making a job change, and his father was really ill. He said he just needed more time to get settled back in to a routine and for life to calm down some. With everything we have had go on the last 6 months, I completely understood and appreciated his feelings. Things have settled down, he plans to stay at his current school for the next year, and his father is back at home from a LTAC facility. I think it's appropriate to discuss again.

    It's hard to balance not wanting to pressure him and being honest with him about my own feelings. We talk about timing and his job (he coaches football and is rarely home July-November) but I don't think he's considered timing for my job. My busiest time at work is March-July so shooting for an early 2018 baby would be perfect for both our schedules. In short, I really need to be more open about how I feel with the whole situation. It's just hard.

    Any R/R? Ha! I think the novel above fills this in. Other than that, I've actually had a pretty good week so far. Still no cabinets!

    GTKY: If money didn't matter, where would you live? I actually love where we are and I love our house (especially with all of the updates our insurance gave us!). I wouldn't mind having a vacation home on the beach though.

    On our way to baby #2!
    BabyFetus Ticker
    EDD March 12, 2018

  • Are you benched or TTA?  TTA

    What brings you here? Waiting for DH to be ready. 

    How long do you think you'll be here?  Originally I said May/June, but I'm thinking more June/July now. See below

    How have things been going? My most recent endocrinologist left the practice and I'm struggling to find a doctor who I trust. I need closer monitoring during pregnancy, and I'm still being regulated from my last pregnancy. I think I finally found somebody (through the recommendation of an old Endo who I LOVED and I called about seeing out-of-network) and she was able to get me an appointment at the beginning of June. Just want to make sure they are on board with the previous monitoring plans I've had during pregnancy if I get pregnant again, and my old Endo ensured me she will. This ain't my first rodeo and I know what I need and what to expect during pregnancy, but since that isn't what is normal any new doctor I see just kind of pats my head and smiles then does something opposite of what I know is the case, hence why I'm still battling to get my levels and dosage correct a year and a half after delivery. 

    Any R/R? Happy to finally have found a good doctor. It's been a long frustrating battle. 

    GTKY: If money didn't matter, where would you live? Probably where I do know just travel a lot. 
  • ChloandCocoChloandCoco member
    edited March 2017
    @AllyTheKid - Welcome back!

    @notthefather - It's definitely hard having a talk without pressuring your DH. Sometimes it helps if you tell him right at the beginning of the talk that you just need to get some things off your chest and that the conversation is not to pressure him. It does sound like it's a good time to bring up TTC again.

    @LivingTheDream - I'm sorry you have to push back your TTC timeline, but at least you found a good doctor after such a long time!

    Are you benched or TTA? TTA

    What brings you here? Just waiting until the agreed time to TTC.

    How long do you think you'll be here? Mid-April! 

    How have things been going? Things have been going pretty well, my cold is almost over! 

    Any R/R? Rant - DH freaked out when I mentioned that I was going to order some preseed last night. Apparently, he thought we were going to NTNP while still using sperm killing lube. I explained to him that NTNP meant I wasn't going to temp (for the first 2 months). I don't think I'm going to get KU the first month anyway because we are travelling and I don't know if we will be able to HIO during my fertile week.

    GTKY: If money didn't matter, where would you live? I would probably live in the same city, but in a different part of town and I would have a cabin on a lake that is a 2-3 hour drive away from town. 

    *Edit - Formatting*
  • @ChloandCoco Almost time!!! Excited for you :) 
  • @LivingTheDream: How frustrating! It's so frustrating when a doctor seems to go through motions and not actually listen. So glad to hear that you were able to get a recommendation from the doctor you trust. Fingers crossed it goes well. Sorry to hear it will set you back a little bit.
    @ChloandCoco: Getting so excited for you! Glad to hear you are on the mend. It seems to be a pattern that partners get freaked out about things like preseed or temping, etc.  

    On our way to baby #2!
    BabyFetus Ticker
    EDD March 12, 2018

  • Are you benched or TTA? TTA

    What brings you here? waiting until the decided time to begin TTC #2 (sometime between Nov and Jan)

    How long do you think you'll be here? Probably about a year

    How have things been going? Actually pretty good! I seem to have caught the cold my son had last week so that's a bit of a bummer, but other than that I can't complain.

    Any R/R? Nope

    GTKY: If money didn't matter, where would you live?  I would live where I am now, but I would definitely buy/start a Christmas tree farm (random I know, but I really love agriculture and Christmas is my favorite holiday!). 
  • @notthefather - It's a good thing I didn't mention OPKs. Haha! 
  • Thanks for the warm welcome-backs =)

    @notthefather I am in a similar boat as you in regards to the baby talk, and @ChloandCoco gave some pretty great advice about it that I will be using!
  • @AllyTheKid welcome back!
    @notthefather good luck talking with DH. It sounds like now is a pretty good time to bring up baby talk again. Agree with @ChloandCoco, tell him it's not to pressure him, but more to get your feelings out there.
    @acdc1109 sorry about the cold :/ 
    @LivingTheDream sorry your timeline changed, but hopefully this doctor works for you!
    @ChloandCoco so excited it's almost time!!


    DH isn't ready yet

    At least until the end of summer, maybe longer apparently :/

    R/R: Apparently DH thought our agreement was to discuss another kid when DS is 1.5, not start trying. So it may be longer for me than I thought :(
    Also, went to my dr today to work on getting some warts removed from my fingers. They're all dried and cracked, and there's one real bad one on my right thumb. So today he numbed that spot, then cut most of it off, then hit it with cryo. It bled pretty good, too. Ugh it hurts so bad!!!! But, I want these damn things gone. I've had them for years now and just never did anything about them. He only did 3 out of about 9. I'm so glad he gave me pain killers, it hurts. 

    GTKY: I have no idea!! We'd probably stay in the same city and build our dream house. Then probably travel more with any leftover money, haha.
    DS1 born 2/28/16
    DS2 due 12/12/18

  • @AllyTheKid I was on Nexplanon and had no issues with it, but of course everyone is different. Can you talk to your doctor to see if you can have it removed and use something else? Those kinds of side effects aren't really tolerable, in my opinion :-/
    @notthefather I hope the conversation goes well tonight! I totally understand not wanting to make your DH feel pressured. It's a hard thing to discuss stuff like this without that happening.
    @LivingTheDream I'm glad you found a new doctor that you're happy with! That's always hard to do.
    @ChloandCoco Yay for you, you're almost there!
    @acdc1109 I hope your cold gets better soon :( And that's an awesome idea about the Christmas tree farm!
    @CecilB93 I'm sorry you and your DH got your wires crossed :( Hopefully you guys can find a middle ground and you won't have to wait that long. Good luck with the warts! I've never had any removed, but my mom has and I remember how miserable she was. They were on her feet, though.

    Are you benched or TTA? Benched for now. Between my back issues and my medications and our current financial situation, it's just not possible until everything gets sorted (i.e., I'm back at work and my pain is under control). We're hoping to get started within a couple of months of that.

    What brings you here? I needed someone to talk to besides my DH and the friends I have who are currently pregnant.

    How long do you think you'll be here? Hopefully not longer than the end of the year! Ideally, by the end of summer, but we'll see how everything goes.

    How have things been going? They're... difficult to say the least. We found out that there's a hiccup in my short term disability paperwork (my doctor apparently didn't fill a form out correctly, or forgot to include my restrictions in it, or something), so we're really stressed about making rent. I haven't had a paycheck in a month and haven't been at work in over a month. We found out that we don't qualify for ANY assistance from the state, and all of the groups in the area that could offer help no longer do this kind of thing. I dropped off a form at my doctor's office this morning so that they can send over my restrictions, and I also forwarded them the email I have from my HR department regarding my leave of absence and everything, so... Hopefully everything will get fixed before the 5th, because that's when our rent is due.

    Any R/R? I'm not sure what this acronym is, but judging by what everyone else has written, it's rants? Just... See above.

    GTKY: If money didn't matter, where would you live? Probably in a nice house with a pool and a big backyard close enough to Magic Kingdom that we can see the fireworks, but far enough that the noise isn't an issue. We love living close to Disney, but would prefer to be a little closer. Oh, and with a great kitchen and a huge soaking tub in the master bath.

    Me: 36 | DH: 35 | Married: 9.17.16
    Diminished ovarian reserve
    BFP: 4/14/2020 EDD: 12/20/2020
  • @AllyTheKid - Yay! Welcome back! Missed having you around here :)
    @notthefather - Good luck with having the talk tonight. Whenever DH and I discuss it I refer to it as 'the project' so the kids don't know what we are talking about lol
    @livingthedream - Ugh! That has got to be so frustrating :( I'm glad you found a good dr. I hope everything gets worked out soon  
    @ChloandCoco - Yay! You are getting so close! I am so excited that we will have our first member graduate to TTC :)
    @acdc1109 - Moms can't get sick! Ain't nobody got time for that! I hope you feel better soon!
    @CecilB93 - I am sorry that your time line got pushed back :( I hope your hand feels better soon. How many times is it going to take to get rid of them? 
    @dreamscapes_ I am so sorry you are having so much trouble with the paper work. FX that everything comes through in time to make rent. I know how stressful that can be. R/R means Rants or Raves :)

    What a crazy day! I just now have gotten a moment to myself!
    Are you benched or TTA? TTA 

    What brings you here? Waiting on DH to be ready mainly but also I really need a due date after December because that is when I finish grad school

    How long do you think you'll be here? May maybe June

    How have things been going? OK I have been so busy this week has been flying by. I am so happy it is almost April :)

    Any R/R? None really today

    GTKY: If money didn't matter, where would you live? I really like where I live - all my family is close by. But I would love a nice condo on the beach and a cabin in the mountains for extended vacations :)
  • @glitzandglitter My doctor made it sound like just one treatment per wart. But...I'm not that hopeful. Some aren't too bad, but the one on my thumb is horrible, so I wouldn't be surprised if it takes a few treatments. He didn't have me schedule a follow-up idk. I guess I'll see what these three are like after the (supposed) blisters are gone and make another appointment from there. 

    @dreamscapes_ Ugh, sorry that your paperwork is all messed up. I hope they get things figured out quickly for you guys!
    DS1 born 2/28/16
    DS2 due 12/12/18

  • @AllyTheKid Welcome back!!
    @notthefather You will have to let us know how the talk goes!!
    @ChloandCoco You're so close!! At least you got the air cleared on what it means to NTNP NOW rather than in a few weeks!
    @CecilB93 I'm sorry your timeline is pushed back! That would be frustrating.
    @dreamscapes_ fingers crossed for you! I hope they get stuff sorted out quickly! You know, bc HR always moves quickly...except for never.
    @glitzandglitter "The Project" lol that's cracking me up. 

    Are you benched or TTA? TTA

    What brings you here? Waiting to hit some financial goals and just waiting for our agreed upon timeline.

    How long do you think you'll be here? May

    How have things been going? Really well! It's getting close enough that I'll probably start to stress! Haha. More and more plans are coming up for the summer and fall that make me think, "Oh, well if I'm pregnant then..."

    Any R/R? Nahhh. Boring.

    GTKY: If money didn't matter, where would you live? EVERYWHERE! New Zealand, Ireland, a fancy loft in Chicago with a rooftop patio (with green space for the dog), any Caribbean island...I could go on, but I won't.  ;)
  • @CecilB93 I'm sorry you and your DH are not on the same page, hopefully he'll come around. I also struggle with warts on my hands (actually also my thumb). I've tried a few times for the doctors to freeze with no luck. It's been about 5/6 years and I keep hoping they go away. Good luck!
  • @CecilB93 @dreamscapes_ @glitzandglitter

    Thanks, feeling sick and stuffy is no fun, but the good new is that I think it's just allergies!  I started using a nasal allergy spray last night and today I am loads better!

    P.S. dreamscapes, I love that you and you DH work at Disney! That's one of my all time favorite places (my DH and I went there on our honeymoon and it was fantastic!). It sounds like my family may be going back next February!  I'd really like to run the Princess 5k and based on the timing next year is a perfect time to do it :smile:
  • @LivingTheDream I had one of the ladies at DSs daycare tell me this morning that someone in her family had warts and did a drop of oil of oregano (essential oil) either two or three times a day for a while and eventually the warts went away! I'm gonna try it, a gal at work is going to bring me a sample of some. Apparently it tastes bad, but I'll suffer through it if it means getting rid of these!! 
    DS1 born 2/28/16
    DS2 due 12/12/18

  • Yay! Congratulations @dreamscapes_! That is such a huge relief. I hope now you can focus on recovery without so much of the stress
    @acdc1109: Hope you feel better! It's tough taking care of others when you're sick. Also, I LOVE the idea of a Christmas tree farm! Picking out and cutting a tree with my family is my favorite childhood Christmas memory.
    @CecilB93: I'm so sorry about the situation with your husband and timing. I went through something similar and it was crushing. Creepy internet hugs to you!
    @UterusesBeforeDuderuses: I would love to go to New Zealand! It's definitely on my long-term goal list.
    @glitzandglitter: Hahaha at "The Project." That's pretty funny.

    ps. We ended up dealing with the house contractor last night so there was no discussion of babies. I saw him looking at the Bump app on my phone. Haha! The irony of it with my recent question about your SO knowing you're on BOTB. Maybe I should just ask him read what I wrote about it yesterday. That would be a lot easier for me!

    On our way to baby #2!
    BabyFetus Ticker
    EDD March 12, 2018

  • @dreamscapes_ What a relief! I am so glad all of it worked out!

    @notthefather - I'm sorry that you didn't get to have the talk last night. Did you at least get the contractor to get a move on and get your projects finished?
  • @notthefather Did you guys at least get things sorted with the contractor? Because that would be good!
    @glitzandglitter We still need to get it approved for the rest of my leave, but yeah, it's definitely a relief!
    Me: 36 | DH: 35 | Married: 9.17.16
    Diminished ovarian reserve
    BFP: 4/14/2020 EDD: 12/20/2020
  • @dreamscapes_: Hopefully, although I'm not so happy about the timeline. He said our new playset will be started Saturday and that cabinets will go in no later than Wednesday. From there he said it will take just a few days until the granite is installed. The only problem is that we are having about 60 people over on Saturday for our daughter's birthday party. It's going to be tight and I'm a tad bit stressed about it. 

    On our way to baby #2!
    BabyFetus Ticker
    EDD March 12, 2018

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