October 2017 Moms

How to tell the teenagers....

So I don't know if anyone has any experience with this or not but going to try anyway... I am not married and this was not a planned pregnancy and we will both be 40 when October comes around. How in the world do we tell our teenage children who we are trying to teach about safe sex that there is a baby coming, we have not told anyone in our families at all and I have only told a few coworkers and my bff. I know we won't be able to hide it much longer but it is so stressful trying to figure out the best way to tell them... I also have a 8 and 10 year old that will be surprised but it's the teenagers that I am most concerned about.... 

Re: How to tell the teenagers....

  • GenTKGenTK member
    Our situation isn't the same but Munich SO just turned 40 and has sons who are 19 and 17 yo. The 17 isn't on the best of terms with everyone. He has some issues and attacked the 19 to the point of police being involved and has sense chosen not to live with us. The 19 is with us full time, and my SO works out of area so I needed him on board asap so I had some adult support in the house. He's very wise for his age, so his dad took him out for a guys evening and just told him. No big fan fair or anything. Just a "Hey, so Gen is pregnant so she needs a little more help here and there and you're in charge of the cat box when I'm not home." 
    It was very low key, no pressure, just a statement of where life is for us and what we need from him. He took it really well. He's been a little more helpful around. I can tell he thinks it's a little weird but he's a good kid. 
    I guess my biggest advice is just to treat them more like adults and don't tip toe around it. Be direct with them and respect that they might fee a little weird but let them know that you need them still and hope for their support. 
  • @nursejennie76 one of my coworker's is in a similar situation as you. I said the same thing to her: don't bring attention and focus on the fact that you two are not married.  Safe sex at 18 is very different than when in your 30s and 40s. It's not the important thing here and the kids will make their own choices when they're grown. My colleagues parents are Irish Catholics and raised 4 daughters with 'Family values' but stuff happens! Instead I would focus on how they will be important to be big brother or sister and how much you love them. I agree with @GenTK that they will eventually come around if you approach them in the right way. 
    Me: 30 DH: 32
    BFP#1: 9/9/2014 DS born 4/7/15
    BFP#2: 6/16/2016 MC/D&C: 7/29/2016
    BFP#3: 10/14/2016 (fingers crossed for a sticky bean)
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