Rant/update

atthemoment · March 2017

Can i use this space to clear my chest? I am like an over inflated balloon about to pop and i need to vent a little. The past 3 days have had my head spinning.

i feel like everyone the drs ultrasound tech nurses have all been looking at me like im a dead man walking with almost pity. I try and find any positive or hope and they shoot it down. Like ok i get you dont want to give ppl false hope but dont take it away from them!

Ex: my nt was 5.2 on monday. It was 4.3 to 4.5 today. I met with a genetic counselor after my scan who told me my overall risk of defects was 30% ( hooray better than what the ob said of 50% monday). I ask if thats a good sign.. "maybe yes maybe no weve seen it go either way with reducing numbers"..drat. ok but 30% chance bad..that means 70% chance good so the odds are in my favor? " Well yes but...the risk is still significant. And even if the chromosomes are normal it could be a heart defect or other issue" They wont give me an inch of hope. I get it they have to be cautious.... whats worse is i rushed back to my ob after with the results and she saw the reduction in nt as a "margin of error ". ? So what the original scan was wrong or this one? Im like beyond done with doctors man this sucks lol choosing/ trying to stay positive is not easy but ill give my best for the next few days/weeks.

@Texafornian i know i dont know you but i have been thinking of and praying for you through all of this. I know it is rough..

Sugargirl1019 · March 2017

So many hugs to you.

Are you on progesterone? Texafornian said progesterone can increase fluid there...

I think it's a great sign the number decreased (idk what's normal? I'll go google). I think the doctor is being a Debbie downer because they have to prepare you for the worst.. I wonder if there is a big liability with patients trying to sue because the doctor made them feel too relieved.

Regardless, one day at a time, one hour at a time. All the hugs, and deep breaths.

mrs_tacos · March 2017

I have no advice to give, other than that I'm sorry you're dealing with this. Lots of hugs to you, and vent here anytime- the women on this board are really great on the hard days. Keep us updated. Lots of prayers for you and your LO, and FX that everything is normal! (hugs)

Carebella · March 2017

Definitely vent here. Miracles happen and even 30-50% chance means you still have a lot of room for a healthy baby. Big hugs to you

Texafornian · March 2017

Since your doctors are being asshats I'm going to be the positive shiny person for you...
1) margin of error or not...your NT measurement is LOWER than it was!! Yay!! It may not mean jack diddly like they said but I'd say that's a DAMN good sign compared to mine going from 5mm to 7mm. Decrease = positive!
2) you haven't gotten your genetics results back yet...that elevated NT can be caused by soooo many things. Could be worst case like they so readily point out because again, they're asshats! It could be something structural which will be able to be FIXED... or...it could just be a random elevated number. I have a few friends who had 7mm measurements, great genetics results and they're kiddos are healthy and wonderful. So do NOT give up hope darlin'...it could just be that your LO is on the high end of a bell curve...
3) you are so not alone with shitty doctor-patient relationships...I feel ya! It took me, no joke, like ten calls to the high risk doc and my doc on Monday to get a damn appointment this week. My doc didn't even call me with my genetics results...her nurse did...AND it wasn't even the test they were supposed to do. Then said nurse told me they were transferring me to high risk and that office would call me "in a few days." Um no...you will book me NOW and I want a damn cvs THIS week and not an amnio 3.5 weeks from now. I think doctors offices and hospitals are getting so big and desensitized that we often eat shuffled and treated like a number instead of the stressed out, freaked out mommas-to-be that we are...they forget it's a sensitive subject and for many, it's their first time having a child so they have no idea wtf is going on and need extra compassion.
4) 30% chance of a crappy outcome does mean 70% chance of a stellar outcome! Odds are in your favor and they're just trying to play advocate.

know you're not alone...know that there IS hope...know that you're a badass, strong mommy and go get what you need. There's no stupid questions...if you need answers, call and bug them to get em. And for sure, don't let them steal your hope. Xo

HollyGolightly09 · March 2017

Everything she ^ said.

you have plenty of reasons to still be hopeful! I'm sorry the Drs are being so negative. I'm sure they think that's their job, but still... rude!!

Hoping and praying that everything is fine. And, of course you can vent here!

ShreyaR · March 2017

Prayers and thoughts and all the positive vibes to you @atthemoment and @Texafornian

lilpoots · March 2017

I'm so sorry that your doctors are being jerks. My first high risk MFM with my first pregnancy was like that too, so I fired his ass and he ended up being totally wrong. I'm crossing every thing that I can that your genetic testing comes back with good results.

sarahufl · March 2017

Sending good vibes your way. I am a big fan of realistic expectations being set, but it is important for medical professionals to stay positive as well. I hope you get good news!

Jamiern01 · March 2017

Sending postitive vibes your way. Sorry your doctors are being so negative.

atthemoment · March 2017

Thank u everyone so much it really does help so much knowing there is safe place with listening ears. For now i just look at LOs picture and replay in my mind the heartbeat i heard for reassurance.
@Texafornian you made me smile just by using the word "asshats" lol. Hoping your CVS goes well.

JNR6510 · March 2017

Hopefully the reduction is a good sign and LO turns out to be happy and healthy! FX for good news!

Texafornian · March 2017

@atthemoment
ASSHATS
ASSHATS
ASSHATS
ASSHATS
ASSHATS

atthemoment · March 2017

Thanks to everyone for the support. I just got my results from M21 back. After the scariest 9 days and worrying..It was negative of chromosome abnormalities and we are having another boy! To say im relieved is an understatement!