Adoption

March - I am adopting/fostering or I want to adopt/foster

Are you thinking about adopting / fostering? Are you in the process of adopting/fostering? If so, please tell us more about yourself and your experiences so far.
 
-What route (Foster Care adoption, domestic, international)?

-Where are you in the process right now (just thinking, home study, waiting for match, etc.)

-How are you feeling about the process right now?

-Any questions?

-Any tips for the steps you’ve passed?

-Anything else to add?
Me: 25   H: 24
TTC #1: September 2015 - October 2016
NTNP: November 2016 - present
TSH levels brought down from 4.56 to 1.69!

Foster Care process
Finished licensing requirements: June 2017
Waiting for our first placement!
techie74SaphireSweetie88

Re: March - I am adopting/fostering or I want to adopt/foster

  • The board was pretty dead last month - I really hope everyone comes back this month!

    -What route (Foster Care adoption, domestic, international)? Foster Care

    -Where are you in the process right now (just thinking, home study, waiting for match, etc.) Waiting for our training session in May

    -How are you feeling about the process right now? Just getting impatient, though it is our own scheduling issues that is causing the delay. Since we live in a big city, there were actually plenty of training dates to choose from and we could have been licensed by now.

    -Any questions? Same as last month - just wondering if anyone else is having a shower and how you are doing it.

    -Any tips for the steps you’ve passed? Nothing that I haven't already said in past posts.

    -Anything else to add? Nope - it's not really much of an update for me since I'm in limbo.
    Me: 25   H: 24
    TTC #1: September 2015 - October 2016
    NTNP: November 2016 - present
    TSH levels brought down from 4.56 to 1.69!

    Foster Care process
    Finished licensing requirements: June 2017
    Waiting for our first placement!
    SaphireSweetie88BusinessWife
  • -What route (Foster Care adoption, domestic, international)? Public adoption

    -Where are you in the process right now (just thinking, home study, waiting for match, etc.) have an information session on Monday night. We will learn more about the process, etc. From there i believe we send in the appropriate paperwork, we attend training sessions, find a match, home study etc.

    -How are you feeling about the process right now? I feel like we have been waiting forever to go to an information session. I live in Canada so every province has its own regulations on how public adoption process goes. The info sessions must be attended before anything further continues. They only run twice a month.

    -Any questions? None at the moment!

    -Any tips for the steps you’ve passed? Nothing yet! I haven't gotten too far in the process yet.

    -Anything else to add? Nope. Just waiting for now.

    Me (26) + DH (26) Together since 10.18.13 - Finally married to the love of my life 02.27.16
    TTC #1 since 12.2014
    *Suspected PCOS*
    12.2015 - MFI Dx (Low count, motility & morph)
    05.2016 - HSG completed (Tubes clear) 
    06.2016 - Clomid + TI = BFN
    10.27.16 - 5mg Letrozole + donor sperm IUI #1 = BFN
    11.29.16 - 5mg Letrozole + donor sperm IUI #2 = BFN
    08.22.17 - 5mg Letrozole + Pregnyl 10,000 USP + donor sperm IUI #3 = BFN
    Stalk my chart


    SaphireSweetie88BusinessWife
  • @WitandWhimsy  Are you trying to adopt a baby or an older child? I know in the US it's almost impossible to adopt a baby via public adoption because it can take a few years for a child to be available for adoption. Is it the same in Canada?
    Me: 25   H: 24
    TTC #1: September 2015 - October 2016
    NTNP: November 2016 - present
    TSH levels brought down from 4.56 to 1.69!

    Foster Care process
    Finished licensing requirements: June 2017
    Waiting for our first placement!
    SaphireSweetie88
  • WitandWhimsyWitandWhimsy member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary First Answer
    edited March 5
    @WitandWhimsy  Are you trying to adopt a baby or an older child? I know in the US it's almost impossible to adopt a baby via public adoption because it can take a few years for a child to be available for adoption. Is it the same in Canada?
    Yeah it is the same here. We are hoping for a child 5 years of age and under. Almost all the children have special needs of some sort, but it could be something as being part of a sibling group or even older.  We are okay with it though, as we just want a child nurture and raise.  We are willing to accept two siblings. I'm afraid we can't have anymore siblings than that because we just don't have the room for 3+ children.

    Basically there is certain criteria that needs to be met before you are approved. The biggest one is a lot of the children may have been exposed to alcohol or drugs during pregnancy so you have to be ready for that. There were a few conditions if you accept you can get a home study assessment done right away, but it's not something DH and I can handle.

    I guess we will learn more about it tomorrow night. 

    Me (26) + DH (26) Together since 10.18.13 - Finally married to the love of my life 02.27.16
    TTC #1 since 12.2014
    *Suspected PCOS*
    12.2015 - MFI Dx (Low count, motility & morph)
    05.2016 - HSG completed (Tubes clear) 
    06.2016 - Clomid + TI = BFN
    10.27.16 - 5mg Letrozole + donor sperm IUI #1 = BFN
    11.29.16 - 5mg Letrozole + donor sperm IUI #2 = BFN
    08.22.17 - 5mg Letrozole + Pregnyl 10,000 USP + donor sperm IUI #3 = BFN
    Stalk my chart


    SaphireSweetie88BusinessWife
  • Axl2Axl2 member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper Photogenic
    edited March 9


     
    -What route (Foster Care adoption, domestic, international)? Domestic Adoption

    -Where are you in the process right now (just thinking, home study, waiting for match, etc.) - Waiting

    -How are you feeling about the process right now? - Really frustrated with the wait and the social worker

    -Any tips for the steps you’ve passed? -  Be patient

    BusinessWife
  • @Axl2  You've been on the waiting list for a year, right? How long does your agency say it typically takes to get a match? What has your social worker done to frustrate you?
    Me: 25   H: 24
    TTC #1: September 2015 - October 2016
    NTNP: November 2016 - present
    TSH levels brought down from 4.56 to 1.69!

    Foster Care process
    Finished licensing requirements: June 2017
    Waiting for our first placement!
    BusinessWife
  • Axl2Axl2 member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper Photogenic

    @britters314 Yes. The agency said it typically will take between 3-4 years. Really hoping sooner. I know a few people who have been placed under a year. Last year they placed 40 babies. 

    In our report she put that my husband has no interpersonal skills which to me you met him twice. And this is a really tough thing to talk about. Then she told us that we need to read this book about infertility and ivf we never did ivf so not sure why that was suggested to us. Then told us we need to deal with the fact we can't have kids, but we have dealt with it just because we never locked ourselves into a closet and cried doesn't mean we haven't dealt with it. The other thing is when I email her, she takes forever to get back to us. Maybe I'm just frustrated with the process. The other weird thing they have on their site is to buy a car seat but we could be on the waiting list for 8 years and depending on the expiry date the car seat will no longer be any good.

    BusinessWife
  • @Axl2  That all does sound really frustrating. Are there any other agencies in your area that you could switch to or is that your only option? Though, I suppose if you do switch you might lose any money that you already spent at your current agency..
    Me: 25   H: 24
    TTC #1: September 2015 - October 2016
    NTNP: November 2016 - present
    TSH levels brought down from 4.56 to 1.69!

    Foster Care process
    Finished licensing requirements: June 2017
    Waiting for our first placement!
    BusinessWife
  • Axl2Axl2 member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper Photogenic
    @britters314 Yeah that is true and we would have to start all over again. Each agency has their own seminar and homestudy. We have spent $8,000 already. I'm just hoping now that we have been on the waiting list for a year they will start showing our profile. I just feel like they are not trying their hardest for the adopting family. We spend a lot of money and don't get a whole lot for that money. And you don't want to say anything because they hold all the power.
  • @Axl2  They haven't even started showing your profile yet?! That's crazy. I'm sorry you have to deal with this.
    Me: 25   H: 24
    TTC #1: September 2015 - October 2016
    NTNP: November 2016 - present
    TSH levels brought down from 4.56 to 1.69!

    Foster Care process
    Finished licensing requirements: June 2017
    Waiting for our first placement!
  • Axl2Axl2 member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper Photogenic

    @britters314 Yeah its a little frustrating but a lot of the times they don't show your profile the first year. There is so many couples waiting ahead of us to be placed so they show their profile first. Well it depends on the birth mom and what she looking for in adopting couple. I'm hoping that the wait isn't much longer. I need to get a list of baby items for when we are placed. We are doing the instant placement so we could get call we will have a short time to get things together. I have few things already I'm kind of clueless on some things lol.

    britters314BusinessWife
  • blackrose-3blackrose-3 member
    100 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper Photogenic
    edited March 16

    -What route (Foster Care adoption, domestic, international)?  Not sure?

    -Where are you in the process right now (just thinking, home study, waiting for match, etc.) Thinking

    -How are you feeling about the process right now? It's all very new and I'm very hopeful.

    -Any questions? Does anyone know how to adopt directly from the parent and not an agency? The little girl I was told about is 4 months old and the mother is just looking for someone to adopt her, no agency.  I found that they need to have a consent form and can put me as the designated adoptive parent, but I'm not sure if you still have to go through the whole process (home study, back ground check, etc). Does anyone know how that process works?

    -Any tips for the steps you’ve passed?

    -Anything else to add? I'm very new to this so any tips would be appreciated.


    BusinessWife
  • Delta04Delta04 member
    2500 Comments Sixth Anniversary Photogenic
    -What route (Foster Care adoption, domestic, international)?  Domestic

    -Where are you in the process right now (just thinking, home study, waiting for match, etc.) 
    Finished home study and getting "profile" ready for match process.

    -How are you feeling about the process right now? Excited and nervous.

    -Any questions? None at this time.

    -Any tips for the steps you’ve passed? The home study can be along process.  Be patient.

    -Anything else to add? I was very active on TB when DH and I were going through fertility treatments from 2010-2012.  I needed to step away for my sanity and to determine our next steps.  We our now adopting and I look forward to connecting with other moms (especially first-time moms) through adoption.
    TTC since 3/07. IVF#1 = canceled. IVF#2 = 0% fertilization. IVF#3 = BFN. IVF#4 = c/p.  
    Moving forward with Adoption 2017!
    BusinessWife
  • @BlackRose  I would contact a lawyer who specializes in adoption to make sure it's all official and legal. I would think that you would only need a home study if the family requests it, but I'm not 100% sure. That's definitely something to ask a lawyer.
    Me: 25   H: 24
    TTC #1: September 2015 - October 2016
    NTNP: November 2016 - present
    TSH levels brought down from 4.56 to 1.69!

    Foster Care process
    Finished licensing requirements: June 2017
    Waiting for our first placement!
    BusinessWife
  • @britters314 I am. I've also been reading the adoptions laws for our state and its possible I just can't figure out what the process is after the parents sign the consent form.


    BusinessWife
  • Hi everybody.  We've started to consider adoption but are in the very, very first steps of thought...We have five kids by birth and I wonder if that is too many for us to be eligible?

    -What route (Foster Care adoption, domestic, international)?  Not sure.  Maybe fost-adopt through Los Angeles County; maybe international?

    -Where are you in the process right now (just thinking, home study, waiting for match, etc.)  Just starting to think.

    -How are you feeling about the process right now?  Kind of excited at the possibilities but concerned that no one would let us adopt because we're already blessed with so many.

    -Any questions?  Does anybody know a family with five children who was able to adopt at least one more?  Does fostering devastate everyone involved if/when a child is reunified with previous family members?  Is a foster child allowed to share a room in a household with other kids?

    -Any tips for the steps you’ve passed?  N/A

    -Anything else to add?
    Laura, mom of:
    James (13)
    William (12)
    Elise (10)
    Zachary (4)
    George (2)

    www.letterstoauntkay.com [making the blog private.  PM me if you want to subscribe]
  • @BlackRose  It is surprisingly difficult to find information on adoption laws, unfortunately...

    @mill1020  It depends on the state, but foster kids can usually share a room with other kids of the same sex. As for being eligible even though you have 5 kids, it also probably varies state to state. In my state, I think the maximum amount of kids in the household they allow is 8. You can probably find that information for California online. If you do a private adoption, I doubt any agency would say you are ineligible, but I could see birth parents choosing childless couples instead (unless they really want their child adopted into a large family).
    Me: 25   H: 24
    TTC #1: September 2015 - October 2016
    NTNP: November 2016 - present
    TSH levels brought down from 4.56 to 1.69!

    Foster Care process
    Finished licensing requirements: June 2017
    Waiting for our first placement!
    BusinessWife
  • @britters314 thank you!  I will do some searching.
    Laura, mom of:
    James (13)
    William (12)
    Elise (10)
    Zachary (4)
    George (2)

    www.letterstoauntkay.com [making the blog private.  PM me if you want to subscribe]
    britters314BusinessWife
  • Axl2Axl2 member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper Photogenic

    @Blackrose I would think you would have to do homestudy. I know in Canada you do.

    @mill1020 I know a couple who have adopted 2 kids when they had 4 bio kids. They will look at do you have the space and money for one more child.


    BusinessWife
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