Am I the only one who hates the "new" Bump?

nattn

I've been a bump member for years and been a part of many of the community boards. I'm not trying to offend anyone. I don't know who changed it, but it is so annoying and boring now. I hate that there aren't constant personal threads. I hate that so many threads that do get started quickly get responses of "do a search to find your answer." I really don't care if multiple people ask similar questions all in a row. I can scroll past if I don't want to read it. I'm not about to open and read a thread with 50+ comments in hopes that whatever is on my mind has been talked about and I can be a week late to the discussion. I don't have time for that. There use to be such a community feel and now it feels like "if you dare start a new thread, you are breaking our rules!"

lap018

You don't have to search through 50+ comments if you use the search function it takes you right to highlighted comments with your searched term directly in them. There is still a community feeling especially when those of us with common problems and experiences (second time moms thread, pregnant after a loss thread, plus size mom thread, etc) but all of those close community threads get shoved down and no one can find them when 400 people want to speshul snowflake themselves a brand new thread every 10 min. I don't like not being able to find my PGAL or STM thread because there are 35 new posts about HCG or "who has morning sickness?" Or "anyone else not finding a heartbeat on a home Doppler?" Etc. 

wyomama0427

mrs_tacos

I've been around The Bump for a long time too. It's definitely different, but there's still a great community here. A lot of people start new threads and aren't jumped on, but it get's frustrating for those who are regular contributors here to wade through umpteen doppler/progesterone/I don't feel pregnant/whatever else threads to find the threads where community and friendships are build. (I'd also like to remind you that on the "old Bump" people might post more personal threads, but they also got flamed by much worse things than "try the search function/you're clogging up the board.") If you dislike it that much here, there are numerous other pregnancy message boards and Facebook groups you can join that might be more to your tastes.   

nattn

I realize how to use the search function, but it's a lot like using google to me. Looking up an old conversation where that person probably isn't going through the same thing they were at the time the comment was made isn't the same at all as having a new conversation with people who are actually dealing with whatever it is right then. 

I didn't mind the flaming that use to happen. It was what is was. This is just boring and I'm bummed because I've been here so long. 

nattn

daniellelynette said:

I've yet to actually see anything on this board worthy of popcorn

mrs_tacos

nattn said:

-snip-

I didn't mind the flaming that use to happen. It was what is was. This is just boring and I'm bummed because I've been here so long. 

Ok. I'm sorry? Poor you? I don't know what kind of responses you're expecting to get here. 

Sprite2012

I agree, OP. It's really hard to get used to. There is a community, but it's different and harder to "get". There are lots of rules, you must conform. Im trying, but it's pretty hard. 

earthtomom

I like it but it is different. I use two other boards as well, to get that really personal feel without so many guidelines. Totally get what you're saying 

kelseyrayay

I get where you are coming from but I think things will pick up more the further we get. I didn't join my last bmb this early so I don't remember it really starting off this slow. 

wyomama0427

nattn said:

daniellelynette said:

I've yet to actually see anything on this board worthy of popcorn

You must have missed it all then. There have been a few popcorn worthy moments. The consensus around here is we actually kind of like the organization and being boring.

BookitBoo

I understand what you mean I do miss the community feeling I had with my last BMB. I expect it will develop the further along we get. I've had a loss in the first Tri before (as many other people here have) and I expect people are subdued because they are holding their breath and praying for sticky babies. 

Becky012016

I don't honestly understand why you crave seeing others get flamed. In my last BMB women would get flamed for days for asking a question that could have been responded to with "use the search function". I've never found it fun to gang up on others for the sole purpose of tearing them down to make myself feel good. You can always find a new board that fits your taste better. 

ColoradoHiker

I agree with the OP, to an extent.  It is pretty boring now, and I don't mind having the weekly threads, but I have started coming less bc I barely see any new ones when I do stop by.

  On the other hand, the overall environment here a few years ago was pretty vicious, and the bump gods started banning a lot of people who got reported, whether they actually deserved it or not.  I don't mind the occasional drive-by, and sometimes the search function is pretty worthless.  I don't mind answering a question multiple times, either.

msashley2010-2

I've been on other message boards. This is my first time being on TB but so far I like TB the best because there is a lack of meanness and drama that a lot of other boards have plenty of. I was on the baby Gaga forum for my first pregnancy and some of those girls were so mean. They'd just tell other members to go kill themselves over a disagreement and it was just way too much. I'm happy for the lack of drama. 

mcdoug211

I agree op I don't care if there's multiple boards on a topic! We all know at 37iish weeks and there will be 47 boards asking if they lost their mucus plug that's just the way it is lol. Comments get lost and even when you make a search and make a comment on a topic it gets lost and not answered. 

RedBreast35

There is never going to be a board culture that pleases everyone. So it seems to me that if you're (general "you" not anyone specific) bored with the way it is, you can participate more and try to create more of the atmosphere you're longing for. Or you can bail. You can't really expect other people to be provocative solely for your entertainment, especially if that's not the kind of women they are. 
The ladies on this board have proven themselves kind and welcoming time and again, and, though that may not be much in the way of "entertainment," it is probably like that because that's the kind of environment we need at this point in our pregnancies. I'm sure things will change and develop as time goes on. 

Texafornian

Well said @RedBreast35...

OP I think if you want to post a new thread on a topic that's already been touched on weeks ago...you should go ahead and do so! I mean, just like you said...if you have a question and need advice from others that are say 11wks now versus those who had that question at 5wks...it's warranted. People might have a different experience with something at different points in their pregnancies. But I'd probably try searching for it first as your specific question might have already been addressed.

Sprite2012

I think I disagree with a lot of these comments that TB used to be mean and vicious. There were some boards that were known to be frequented by these kinds of women. They flamed everyone, corrected them, made them feel terrible, etc. But not every board was like that. My BMB was wonderful until around 30ish weeks, then it got kind of weird. 

FWIW, there are still plenty of mean women on TB who go out of their way to make women feel like idiots. We've had a few on this board. They're not regulars, but they went out of their way to insert themselves and make someone feel stupid for saying something. So, that meanness is still here. It's just handled a lot differently because there aren't mods. 

What I find different that is not fun is this requirement to use certain threads for certain things. Post certain topics on certain days. And the immediate hesitation I feel when I want to start a discussion or do a "S/O" of something else. That ridigity of the "new" Bump is what I feel OP is really talking about. It changes the atmosphere, the community. Mean girls will always be mean girls, and they'll be here until they get banned. 

HollyGolightly09

I wasn't around before, so I guess I shouldn't even comment. 

But... I am OCD enough that I like the organized structure. I also like that if I'm wondering "is anyone else so constipated they want to die?" I know to go to the symptoms thread. 

I'm also an anxious enough person that all this "flaming" I hear of would have probably made me nervous and I would have either left, or not participated and lurked. 

So, I guess what I'm saying is- perhaps new bump is made for slightly neurotic people like me? 

wyomama0427

Well said @Sprite2012

DPandMB

I agree that it's a little boring at this point, but I've kinda chalked it up to the newness of this BMB and the fact that people are getting used to everything still. Also I think some women are so nervous about the first trimester, that they are hesitant to become too active yet.

That being said, I think there is a growing community. There are some regulars who try to post and respond frequently. Also FWIW, I don't think people are going to jump on someone who "doesn't do it correctly", searching for answers to simple questions is considered reasonable, jointing a thread that is still on the 1st page about your questions is reasonable, and posting a duplicate issue, that is more complex and a little while later is also acceptable in my book. This BMB is sooooo much nicer than my last BMB. 

MySallyGirl

It has been an adjustment.  It's different & I can relate to that.  It's a bit slower.

sableeg

Personally, while I love reading a bit of drama I like this new organized and calm feel much better.  I never posted before in the old Bump because I was so afraid of getting jumped on.  This is a much more collaborative and supportive environment!