Trying to locate help, running into dead ends

burnsmommy27

Hi ladies,

I am 8 Month's PP. I have been feeling crazy lately, I don't even know how to describe it all. I am sad for no reason, I have a healthy happy baby girl, a great husband and a good job. But no matter what I do I am not happy. I have really bad anxiety attacks. 3 now this month. When I started feeling sad and angry I attributed it to not being happy with my job (2 months ago) and went out and got a new job. It's better, pays more and I like it. But I'm still not happy to the point of dreading even thinking about working. 

After deciding that something was wrong that I couldn't tough out or fix it took me another 2 Weeks to talk to DH. And when I did I had a complete breakdown. 

I have called my OB office and they said they would not see me or treat me for anything Post Partum because my "PP window is closed". I am in the process of establishing a new PCP with my new insurance for work but still have a 6 week wait. 

I am at a loss and called my husband bawling before work today. I am out of ideas of where to go or look for help short of showing up at an ER. Do any of you have any suggestions for me? Thanks so much, sorry I know it was a long read.

WeddingNotes13

I am so sorry to hear that you are having this difficulty. You deserve so much credit for reaching out!  Is there a counselor's office in your town that you could call? I also would wonder about calling the mother/baby unit at the hospital where you delivered to ask for suggestions.

You have possibly already seen the websites listed below, but there are also a few phone numbers. Try them for immediate support or ideas for resources. There are also post-partum groups on FB. You might search for and check them out for support as you try to get into a provider. 

Sorry if these are things that you have already seen. I had a difficult time finding resources when I was having more difficulty and didn't have time or energy to find these things at that point. 

More information

• Depression during and after pregnancy: A resource for women, their families and friends from the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Health Resources and Services Administration, Office of Maternal and Child Health
• Mental Health America, 800-273-TALK (8255)
• National Alliance on Mental Illness, 800-950-NAMI (6264)
• Postpartum Progress
• Postpartum Support International, 800-944-4PPD (4773)

burnsmommy27

Thanks so much for the reply. It means a lot to me. I ended up going to the Crisis Response Center in my town because I felt like I was about to loose it. They have been very helpful getting me where I need to go. I have an appointment tomorrow morning with a doctor and an appointment tomorrow evening to speak with a counselor. 

I am going to look into the Facebook groups as you suggested. It is so hard because my husband doesn't quite understand how I feel or what is happening.  

WeddingNotes13

I am so glad to hear that you found the Crises Response Center to start with and that they were so helpful! It is great that you will be able to see a doc and therapist today!  I will b thinking of you. I had a lot of trouble speaking up about the level of difficulty that I was having. You are strong for making these appointments. Keep that strength with you as you move forward in seeking help.

I was lucky in that my DH was understanding, but I still found it so helpful to connect with other moms that shared the struggle. It is like nothing else that I had ever experienced. 

Let me know how things go today! 

burnsmommy27

Thanks for the support. I am sitting here waiting to start my intake with the psychiatrist. I'm nervous... 

I'm VERY independent and telling my husband something was wrong was one of the hardest things I've done. I feel so crazy and not myself

WeddingNotes13

Yes, I can relate so much to not feeling like yourself and the struggle to express the depth of it.  

How was your appointment? Did the dr seem to hear you and offer some helpful options?

burnsmommy27

The appointment was good I think. She is changing the medicine that the Crisis Center started me on. Which is good because I felt like I didn't need it all. She believes because of family history my PPD may have turned into a form of bipolar. I'm not sure I agree but it is the second psychiatrist to say that in a week. 

I also so a therapist last night and I really liked her. I think she had some insight into what I was feeling and some of the reasons behind it all. 

So I'm just gonna take it day by day and see what happens. I'll be seeing the therapist once a week.

How long has it been for you? What things did you find most helpful to start your journey?

WeddingNotes13

That is wonderful! It is great that you found a good match for a therapist. Hopefully, things regarding a diagnosis and medication will make more sense with time, whether your current meds and diagnosis are the best fit or whether they need changed. 

I struggled significantly for about two months, but continued have difficulty for a while. Finally, around six months PP, I started to feel back to myself. Finding support groups for moms/new moms and seeing a therapist were the most helpful things that I encountered. When I mentioned my difficulty to my OB at 4 weeks, he quickly dismissed it. Because of that, I never pursued further medical treatment and it took me a while to find additional support.