@lovelongdog06 it crashes whenever I open a thread with a lot of pictures.. (like HDBD, Ultrasounds and announcement threads) I usually have to use the browser version if I want to view those. Regular text threads don't usually give me a problem
@lovelongdog06 I have issues with the app too. It doesn't let me start posts, and most of the time it cuts off my posts halfway though when I post from the app. So, I just use it to lurk, and if I'm actually posting I use the website. I don't have issues with the website at work, because our network has an adblocker on it, but at home there's always this stupid video ad that pops up in the bottom corner and makes my page reload randomly.
Also, whenever I see your username I read it as "love long dong" because I'm apparently still a 5 year old, haha.
For those with budgeting woes with your DH, I cannot recommend You Need A Budget enough. It's a program you do together and unlike any other budgeting software. It helped us go from pay check to paycheck to 2months ahead and 6 months of living in savings. I was good at money, he wasn't. We used to have tension about it but now we seriously enjoy our weekly budget meetings. It's such a freedom to not feel that stress.
Me: 31 DH: 36 Married 5 years DD born 8/30/13 #2 expected 4/25/17
@cafedisco I LOVE You Need A Budget. It is so much better than Mint, IMHO. It helped us save $7,000 in 2016 alone (for daycare...) But I'm scared to finish uploading our December spending...I just have to do it, though. I know it's going to be bad. I started using it when it was the desktop version and I haven't switched to the SAAS one. I don't do the whole live off last month's money thing, but I do give every dollar a job.
DD #1: April 2017 DD #2: May 2020 Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
@Nolegirl1185, in terms of being upside down or continuing to invest, can you take a look at what you've spent on your vehicle over the last 2 years to estimate your costs until the loan is paid off? If you keep having to invest in the car, you may spend more on repairs than you would being upside down on the trade in.
@cafedisco@catem07 Another big fan of You Need a Budget (YNAB)! It's been so helpful for us...DH is way better with budgeting than I am, and it helps keep us on the same page. Plus, we're able to stash away money for different savings goals into their own category (DH is saving up for a new bike, for example), so we don't get hit super hard when we make those big purchases. I also have a fund for my maternity leave, since about 4 weeks of it will be unpaid, and it's helpful to see that we have that money stored away now and it will be available when I need it in the spring.
These little kid swear word stories are making me giggle! My oldest niece used to say "big t*ts" instead of "pictures" when she was younger and wanted to look at a picture someone had just taken on their phone. I still laugh thinking about it.
@SnarkasaurusRex@cafedisco@catem07 Thanks for the suggestion. I'll have to check that out. I've just been budgeting on my own (which hasn't turned out horribly, other than the fact that DH has access to the money in our accounts!). Every dollar has a place. We put money in savings. I budget for food, gas, and even budget some for an "extras" category for eating out or birthday gifts, etc. We have enough money to make a LARGE payment to our credit card. The issue is that some months, our charges on that credit card are just as much as the payment. THAT'S what needs to stop. I do all my budgeting on Excel and I've tried to show DH, but he just doesn't seem interested. I think he feels like showing him a budget is constricting him. Plus, my income is always stable (paid 1x per month, exact same dollar amount) whereas DH is paid weekly, but he works in the construction field and if he doesn't work a day or two, then he doesn't get paid, so sometimes his income will greatly affect our budget...
Whew....sorry guys. This was probably way more information than you even cared about.
DH and I use the Every Dollar app together and we love it. I have heard great things about YNAB though too. I'm proud of you ladies for taking finances in hand. I did all my own before marriage and now I let DH handle the bills and I handle the every day purchases. It works well. Either way, using the app allows us both to log in and see how much in each category has been used up during the month so we have no excuses for going over budget. And it's right on my phone. I love it. Though we still disagree over some things. I go over budget in groceries almost every month and I keep telling him we need to talk about how it's not working and we need to pull funds from some other, less needed category. I dread the budget change discussion for baby also. It won't change a whole lot when I become SAHM because we've been living on his paycheck and saving mine anyway. But babies still cost more than two people alone! Good luck y'all with those conversations. Money conversations are never fun.
@KirstinH88 and @nolegirl1185, add my husband to your club. I do the budgeting/bill paying and he always seems to think there is plenty to go around. Um no, especially not when we are prepping for another child. He admits as well that if I didn't keep track of things and it were up to him that we'd be in major trouble. Well ok, sometimes he thinks he could do just fine and then I so "kindly" remind him of how much debt and bills in collection he had before he met me haha!
@KirstinH88 We also live on last month's money and budget it out for the next (so the money we earn in January is what we will budget for February), so that might be helpful with your H's fluctuating paychecks. We have categories for everything...monthly bills like the mortgage and daycare, everyday expenses like groceries, eating out, "fun money" for me and DH, things for the kiddos...it's been really helpful. And since it has an app, you and DH can log your purchases in real time, so you know where your money is (like, I can see that DH went to Starbucks this morning, haha). We can plan in advance for bigger purchases (we've been putting a lot more money into the Kids category lately because we know we have things we need to get for baby girl), so it helps us stay balanced. We're really fortunate in that we scrimped and saved for a while before we got married to pay off all of our credit card debt, and now with budgeting we've been able to keep it so that we don't carry any credit card balance from month to month. We've also got a pretty sizable emergency budget built up at this point, too, which came in handy when DS was hospitalized over the summer because it didn't impact our day-to-day stuff.
DH would be laughing his butt off if he knew that I was giving budgeting advice to someone on the internet, haha. He had to do a lot of training with me to get me to appreciate budgeting, and YNAB was what really helped me get (and stay) on board.
How does using last months money work out? Do you have to really scrimp and save to get to that point? I mean, you can't just not pay a months worth of bills...how long did it take you to get to that point? As soon as I get to work, I'm digging into all of this YNAB stuff.
@KirstinH88 DH set it all up, but if I remember correctly, we planned our initial budget a ways out. So, if it was January, I think the first month we budgeted was March, using the paychecks we got in February. I'm pretty sure that we did have to dip into our savings a bit to make February work, so that month was tight, but once we got on the budget things were a lot easier. There are a lot of good resources online and forums for getting setup that I know he used.
@HappyAnjel YNAB (can't say for the other ones) syncs through all of your devices. DH and I both have the apps on our phone as well as on our home computer.
@kirstinh88 one nice thing about YNAB too is that current credit card charges are treated like money you already spent. I put nearly everything on my amex (earned $400 in rewards this year! which I'm saving for a nice nursery chair once we move) but when it comes to pay the $2,000+ bill on it on the end of the month, I know I have the money because those items were already classified in YNAB. I don't rely on my bank balance to tell me how much money I have, I rely on what YNAB tells me I have. This sounds really confusing but it's not I promise.
I don't think YNAB likes it if you carry a balance on your CC though. I don't do that so I'm not sure how it works... But if you have CC debt you're paying off now it will create something called "Pre-YNAB Debt" you budget for.
DD #1: April 2017 DD #2: May 2020 Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
@kirstinh88one nice thing about YNAB too is that current credit card charges are treated like money you already spent. I put nearly everything on my amex (earned $400 in rewards this year! which I'm saving for a nice nursery chair once we move) but when it comes to pay the $2,000+ bill on it on the end of the month, I know I have the money because those items were already classified in YNAB. I don't rely on my bank balance to tell me how much money I have, I rely on what YNAB tells me I have. This sounds really confusing but it's not I promise.
I don't think YNAB likes it if you carry a balance on your CC though. I don't do that so I'm not sure how it works... But if you have CC debt you're paying off now it will create something called "Pre-YNAB Debt" you budget for.
Yes to the bolded! I was trying to figure out how to say just that but I couldn't get it out in a way that made sense, haha.
I also forgot about the Pre-YNAB Debt category...that's where you would put your existing credit card balances, and then you would budget to pay those off while also budgeting your usual purchases.
Another budget fan here! We use EveryDollar and love how easy it is to use. @HGRich Do you do the premium version? I've been toying with upgrading because it would be nice to have the transactions automatically loaded.
I also like the idea of living off last months income! I'm going to look into that more.
@belocin yes--DH and I think the convenience is totally worth it. It's awesome to just drag and drop already loaded transactions into each budget category. It's also easy to split transactions when I buy something from more than one category in the same place.
@pammasu0909 So far there isn't any major things wrong with the car. We have replaced the motor in both the driver and passenger windows at 450$ each, which apparently is a common problem in our car. We have replaced all 4 tires, which is to be expected at some point (and replaced one two days ago for having 2 nails somehow get in it - luckily it was free since we replaced them under a year ago). The brakes have been done, cabin filter, etc etc. I think it's all maintenance stuff other than the window motors. But it's very possibly with it being a 7 year old car that it's going to start needing more and more. I spoke with my dad this evening and he agrees it would be best to just keep our car and pay it off. With DH getting a car, adding that insurance, a baby, and daycare we probably wouldn't be able to afford a higher payment. Sigh...
DH and I were talking about how much our monthly baby related expenses would be every month. He, oh so naively, said that the LO would not make much of a difference. Imagine his shock when I told him that just daycare and additional insurance would add an extra $1,000/month! I mean really buddy, did you think daycare was going to take care of our kiddo out of the kindness of their hearts?
This might be something all of you car buying family's already know but winter is actually the best time to buy a new rig! Since its the off season at least for most u.s. northern states being its winter a dealer is more likely to work with you just to get a sale. And also if there's a certain brand (our family is ford) try to get to know a dealer. Our close family has been buying from the same dealer for quite a few years now so he does his best to give us a great deal. We just got a new pickup for 0% interest and just short of 12k msrp, it doesn't get much better than that buying new.
DH and I were talking about how much our monthly baby related expenses would be every month. He, oh so naively, said that the LO would not make much of a difference. Imagine his shock when I told him that just daycare and additional insurance would add an extra $1,000/month! I mean really buddy, did you think daycare was going to take care of our kiddo out of the kindness of their hearts?
Outside of the biggies (daycare and insurance), we don't budget that much differently for LO on a monthly basis. She has a $75/month budget for supplies. I don't know if that's helpful for anyone, but I know we were stabbing in the dark during pregnancy....
That covers diapers once we stopped using cloth, lotions/shampoos, new clothes, shoes, gifts, etc.
It does NOT cover classes, but we can't afford to budget for that on a regular basis.
So far, our grocery budget hasn't really changed much, even though she only eats solids. We just feed her what we eat and she only consumes very little. The only thing we have to get specially for her is milk.
I'm sure everyone has a different number, but this has worked for us through the stages of the last 3.5 years!
Me: 31 DH: 36 Married 5 years DD born 8/30/13 #2 expected 4/25/17
DH and I were talking about how much our monthly baby related expenses would be every month. He, oh so naively, said that the LO would not make much of a difference. Imagine his shock when I told him that just daycare and additional insurance would add an extra $1,000/month! I mean really buddy, did you think daycare was going to take care of our kiddo out of the kindness of their hearts?
Outside of the biggies (daycare and insurance), we don't budget that much differently for LO on a monthly basis. She has a $75/month budget for supplies. I don't know if that's helpful for anyone, but I know we were stabbing in the dark during pregnancy....
That covers diapers once we stopped using cloth, lotions/shampoos, new clothes, shoes, gifts, etc.
It does NOT cover classes, but we can't afford to budget for that on a regular basis.
So far, our grocery budget hasn't really changed much, even though she only eats solids. We just feed her what we eat and she only consumes very little. The only thing we have to get specially for her is milk.
I'm sure everyone has a different number, but this has worked for us through the stages of the last 3.5 years!
I will add that if you are not breastfeeding or can not breastfeed. Formula will be about an extra $20-40/week! (Depending on how much LO eats)
@thecavfamily Whenever I talk to DH about daycare costs (we've already wait listed), he is so amazed. We aren't paying your mom anymore, we won't be getting the family discount! Of course it's going to cost more money! Luckily, we are under DH's insurance and already on the family plan, so adding one more doesn't affect our insurance premiums at all.
Our insurance costs will go up about $115/mo. Right now DH and I are both on individual plans but we'll go on a family plan through my job. I'm hoping to be able to breastfeed so won't have formula costs (FX). We're figuring $2,000/mo for daycare (woo-hoo Boston...), which we've been saving for for a while. We will probably try to come up with $1,000/mo for daycare from our income and pull the other $1,000 from savings, which will last us for a bit.
Don't forget that your taxes will go down for adding a dependent (save about $1,000 if you're in the 25% bracket), and if you have a dependent care FSA you can shield $5,000 of your income from taxes (if your childcare expenses meet or exceed $5,000). There's also the $1,000 childcare tax credit (which starts to phase out over $110,000 for married filing jointly).
@KirstinH88 yes, absolutely to formula! We did have to buy some but during that phase, we still used CDs so I guess we saved on diapers initially so it balanced out.
And to add, breastfeeding is definitely not free for most. Lotions, rubs, pump parts if you pump, nursing bras, nursing covers, milk tea, etc. It adds up. And if you have any problems, seeing lactation consultants adds up too. There are ways to do all of the above more cheaply and then more extravagantly, of course, but I think we were a little surprised by how much we spent when breastfeeding problems cropped up.
Me: 31 DH: 36 Married 5 years DD born 8/30/13 #2 expected 4/25/17
@cafedisco Just to add... even if you breastfeed, if you let someone else feed the baby there's bottles and nipples and bags and all the little stuff. So definitely not free! I spent at least $100 on my last kid just trying to find a bottle she wouldn't refuse!
Agree on the breastfeeding can get expensive comment. I had a lot of issues and wound up seeing 4 different lactation consultants (and every time I had an appointment I had to pay my specialist copay of $45), pump parts, and renting a hospital grade pump for 4 months. That got craaaazy expensive. And then we wound up having to buy formula anyway.
We budget $150 a month for DS. $80 of that is for his swim classes, and the rest goes to clothes, shoes, toys, etc. If we can swing it, we plan on upping the budget to $250 once DD is here. We pay for diapers and wipes out of our "groceries" fund because that's where we usually buy them, and now that DS eats solids all the time the only things we buy special for him is his milk and the squeezey veggie pouches because they're good on-the-go snacks, haha.
Daycare is its own budget category. We don't budget for insurance because it comes straight out of DH's paycheck, so we never see the money in our accounts anyway.
18 hours into new meds and I'm starting to feel human! This doctor told me if I don't see drastic results to call them Saturday morning and they would give me priority treatment. I'm so grateful someone is not only taking me seriously, but offering solutions as well.
@cafedisco Just to add... even if you breastfeed, if you let someone else feed the baby there's bottles and nipples and bags and all the little stuff. So definitely not free! I spent at least $100 on my last kid just trying to find a bottle she wouldn't refuse!
^YES. DS would not eat from the bottles we first bought and had to try 2 others before we found ones he would. I think the same can be said for diapers as well. DS leaks through everything except Pampers and we only use Pampers wipes bc the Huggies brand made him break out in rash each time we used it (they seem to be more saturated than Pampers, plus DS has sensitive skin). However, that being said we've been stocking up on diaper sizes 1-3 before this one is born. I'd like to not have to buy that many during maternity and we will hopefully be transitioning DS out of diapers and having him potty trained before or soon after LO is here. Every other week I buy a small package of one of those sizes just to get a head start. Plus I can always exchange them if LO is the opposite of DS with Pampers, we never had an issue exchanging different brands we got from his baby shower w/o a receipt.
Jumping on the budget discussion here.... @Nolegirl1185@KirstinH88 My DH is the same way about budgeting. Anytime I tell him we need to sit down and go over our bank statements, he always puts me off. However, he does have excellent credit, and hates spending money. I would say he almost "hordes" money- like tax returns and any bonuses he receives, but what he does spend a little bit on makes me so frustrated! He probably spends anywhere from $10-$25 everyday he works on going out to eat, and vending machine snacks. I have offered to pack his lunch for him everyday, and he refuses, making up all kinds of excuses. After reading this thread, it sounds like the YNAB app might be the one for us, so he can actually see how much he is spending on junk.
@rachelmiller03 I am definitely spending time this weekend looking into YNAB. The only thing we ever attempted was some Quicken thingymabob and I hated it so much. Complete waste of money.
@KirstinH88 that's crazy! Seems like yesterday I found out I was pregnant.
Maybe I'm super late to the show here, but have any of you downloaded the app Shell? I'm not sure if it's only for iPhone, but you can put the microphone up to your belly and hear the babies heartbeat! I just sent a recording of it to DH.
@KirstinH88 nice. I'll have to try it. I looked at heartbeat apps early on but most cost something or required some other device. So of course I wanted a real Doppler when baby was tiny. But now that she's big enough for a phone to pick it up I'll give it a shot.
Re: Randoms 1/2
Baby Boy due 04/07/17
Also, whenever I see your username I read it as "love long dong" because I'm apparently still a 5 year old, haha.
DH: 36
Married 5 years
DD born 8/30/13
#2 expected 4/25/17
DD #2: May 2020
Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
DD #2: May 2020
Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
This was the first year we set uparainy day for both Thanksgiving and Christmas! It felt really great.
DH: 36
Married 5 years
DD born 8/30/13
#2 expected 4/25/17
Whew....sorry guys. This was probably way more information than you even cared about.
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
DH would be laughing his butt off if he knew that I was giving budgeting advice to someone on the internet, haha. He had to do a lot of training with me to get me to appreciate budgeting, and YNAB was what really helped me get (and stay) on board.
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
Baby Boy due 04/07/17
I don't think YNAB likes it if you carry a balance on your CC though. I don't do that so I'm not sure how it works... But if you have CC debt you're paying off now it will create something called "Pre-YNAB Debt" you budget for.
DD #2: May 2020
Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
I also forgot about the Pre-YNAB Debt category...that's where you would put your existing credit card balances, and then you would budget to pay those off while also budgeting your usual purchases.
I also like the idea of living off last months income! I'm going to look into that more.
Baby #2 due April 2017
That covers diapers once we stopped using cloth, lotions/shampoos, new clothes, shoes, gifts, etc.
It does NOT cover classes, but we can't afford to budget for that on a regular basis.
So far, our grocery budget hasn't really changed much, even though she only eats solids. We just feed her what we eat and she only consumes very little. The only thing we have to get specially for her is milk.
I'm sure everyone has a different number, but this has worked for us through the stages of the last 3.5 years!
DH: 36
Married 5 years
DD born 8/30/13
#2 expected 4/25/17
@thecavfamily Whenever I talk to DH about daycare costs (we've already wait listed), he is so amazed. We aren't paying your mom anymore, we won't be getting the family discount! Of course it's going to cost more money! Luckily, we are under DH's insurance and already on the family plan, so adding one more doesn't affect our insurance premiums at all.
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
Don't forget that your taxes will go down for adding a dependent (save about $1,000 if you're in the 25% bracket), and if you have a dependent care FSA you can shield $5,000 of your income from taxes (if your childcare expenses meet or exceed $5,000). There's also the $1,000 childcare tax credit (which starts to phase out over $110,000 for married filing jointly).
https://blog.turbotax.intuit.com/tax-deductions-and-credits-2/family/tax-benefits-for-having-dependents-12835/
DD #2: May 2020
Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
And to add, breastfeeding is definitely not free for most. Lotions, rubs, pump parts if you pump, nursing bras, nursing covers, milk tea, etc. It adds up. And if you have any problems, seeing lactation consultants adds up too. There are ways to do all of the above more cheaply and then more extravagantly, of course, but I think we were a little surprised by how much we spent when breastfeeding problems cropped up.
DH: 36
Married 5 years
DD born 8/30/13
#2 expected 4/25/17
We budget $150 a month for DS. $80 of that is for his swim classes, and the rest goes to clothes, shoes, toys, etc. If we can swing it, we plan on upping the budget to $250 once DD is here. We pay for diapers and wipes out of our "groceries" fund because that's where we usually buy them, and now that DS eats solids all the time the only things we buy special for him is his milk and the squeezey veggie pouches because they're good on-the-go snacks, haha.
Daycare is its own budget category. We don't budget for insurance because it comes straight out of DH's paycheck, so we never see the money in our accounts anyway.
DS--N14
Baby #2 EDD--4/16/17
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
@KirstinH88 that's crazy! Seems like yesterday I found out I was pregnant.
Baby Boy due 04/07/17
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17
Married: 5/30/2013
DSS #1: 5/25/2007
DSS #2: 1/22/2011
DS #3: 7/8/2012
BFP: 3/14/2016 ~ MC: 3/19/2016
DS #4: 4/21/17