GTKY: Working or SAHM

KMD1106

Just because I'm curious: Are you (or will you be) a working or stay at home mom?

KMD1106

With teaching, I feel like I get a taste of both worlds. I wish I could be 50% working and 50% sah, but I feel lucky that I get a solid salary and summers with kids. 

CherryBananas

One my maternity leave is over (12 months in Canada) I will go back for three days a week. No one in my office works full time as everyone has kids at home. It will be a nice balance for me, and I'll still be able to contribute financially to our family. 

hp_momma

I continued to teach the first year I had DD1 but switched to a SAHM after the school year was over. I'll continue to be a SAHM with baby #3 and the plan is until all the kids are back in full day school. I still work on continuing education classes to keep my certificate valid. 

MrsFreeman2010

I'm a full time nurse, so I work three nights a week. It's the best of both worlds...I'm home for 7 days at a time and then get to enjoy my time at work. 

pshaortao

I used to work in human resources back in CA full time until I delivered. I enjoyed my job but it didn't make sense financially to stay because most, if not all my income would have gone toward daycare. I was fortunate enough to be able to come in a few hours every Sunday to take care of payroll while DH watched DD. It was really nice to be able to get away just for a bit. Since we moved, I'm 100% a SAHM and will continue to be with this LO in the picture.

achays11

Working mom here, but I have every Tuesday off. It's nice because I get time with DD and time to do errands/chores. 

chickyclg

I quit my full time job when I started my first IVF cycle then I worked as a substitute teacher 3 days a week until I was 20 weeks with the twins.  I've been a SAHM ever since. 

This fall I did go back to school full time to finish my teaching degree in SPED.

mrsrep123

Working as a Registered Nurse. I was able to manipulate my schedule to only work 2 days in a row and have at least 2 days off in a row... 4 days on one week and 3 days on the other week. It works for us as MH is with our son when I'm at work. When I worked 4 in a row, it was too much for him... so we have a nice balance now. Also, when I ask for vacation days, I can ask for 1 day off every other week and have 5 days off in a row! 

kns1988

DH will be a stay at home dad, hopefully. He still has to do some work from home in the off season, but we think he'll be able to watch the baby too. 

heath313

Teaching now, but taking a year's leave for the 2017-2018 school year.

diann21

I have a non-traditional teaching job. I teach middle school classes once a week and elementary enrichment classes two mornings a week. Most of the rest of my job is online, monitoring online classes for middle & high school students, which I can do from home. So after summer break, I'll likely continue with my job as it is, working from home while watching LO and sending her to be with MIL on the days I physically need to be at work. 

ShadeofGreen816

I'm currently part time (2 12-hr days/week) as an RN and I will finish grad school for NP May 3rd. After baby comes, I'll take my 12-week leave and then will probably stay part time and pick up extra days as I want them. That way we only have to figure out childcare 2 days/week at first. Once I'm certified an an NP, I'll start looking for a job and hopefully take a full time position starting around the 1st of the year? That timeline is totally made up and just my dream but it seems right. Once I'm working as an NP we will be using daycare full time, I think. 

BeachMommy2B

I'm a Sr. Financial Analsyt for a large publicly traded company. I will be going back after my maternity leave, which is 12 weeks. BUT I quickly realized with DD 3 years ago I could not be a SAHM. I was so ready to go back to work and be around adults when my leave was over. There are times I wish I could have an extra day with her a week, but I like working. 

MrsFox2008

I will officially be a SAHM in two weeks! I went back full time for three months after maternity leave with DD then stepped down to part time and have gradually have worked less and less. Now that our second is on her way we've decided that I'll be a SAHM. I'm excited about the change. 

Hansolosparka

DH is a stay at home dad and I work. I really love my
job so I feel like I get the best of both worlds and it works great for us. I'm with @BeachMommy2B  the stay at home life is not for me. My job allows me to work from
home quite a bit so I don't feel like I'm missing out on time with DS. 

nda_roxybabe

I think I'd love to be a SAHM, but I enjoy my new job and I don't want to give up my awesome benefits. I currently work M-F 8-5, but am hoping to change to 7-3:30.

museic-2

I would love go be a SATM but expect to go back to work after maternity leave. DH will be starting grad school though and the school I teach at is very demanding, I usually work 6:30-5 or even past 7pm, take home work, and go in on Sundays. Because of this I will be looking for a different school or job once baby is born and am excited about finding a better work/life balance!

NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot

I work full time 40-50 hrs a week. DD is in daycare 5 days a week. Both DH and I have great jobs and wouldn't want to go SAH. I love my job and I love my time with my kid. I always say that I look forward to going home every night and I look forward to going to work every morning. 

starphish18

I currently work full time, but I'll be making the transition to SAHM once the baby comes. I don't make a lot with my job, so there's not a massive financial benefit to me going back to work. Most of my pay would be going to child care. I enjoy working with dogs, but I think I'll really enjoy being a SAHM, too. We'll play it by ear, though. Who knows, it might not end up being for me, in which case I'd go back to part time work, at least.

clebl24

I'm a partner in a law firm. I enjoy my work and my current job. I feel that I worked way too hard in school and to advance my career to leave work for more than 12 weeks of maternity leave.  

nda_roxybabe

Meant to add, I have the advantage of having my Mom local and she will watch baby during the day. If we had to pay for childcare it may be a different story. H also works from home, so I feel like we have a great arrangement prepared.

livin541

I'm the "breadwinner" in the family at the moment, and I've been at my job for 14 years. I went back after 16 weeks of maternity leave with DS1, but with the retail schedule I feel like I miss out on so much working nights, weekends and holidays! I will take another 16 weeks this time, then probably not go back. The plan is to have the holidays off (for the first time ever as an adult!!) and then look for something more flexible in addition to my WAH business. So many changes coming, but I am excited for them. 

MTB16

I'm a lawyer also, and like @clebl24 feel that I worked way to hard for it to take more than my already generous maternity leave!

NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot

I didn't know we had a few other lawyers around here.  I agree with @MTB16 and @clebl24.  I worked hard in school and my job to get here.  I know some moms in the legal profession take a few years off to raise kids, but I can't imagine coming back from that. 

WombThereItIs

BeachMommy2B said:

I'm a Sr. Financial Analsyt for a large publicly traded company. I will be going back after my maternity leave, which is 12 weeks. BUT I quickly realized with DD 3 years ago I could not be a SAHM. I was so ready to go back to work and be around adults when my leave was over. There are times I wish I could have an extra day with her a week, but I like working. 

Word. I am so happy to be a working mom. I work because I want to and I enjoy it. SAHM is just not for me. I remember at the end of my 12 weeks of FMLA I was so happy to go back even though I was exhausted. It's fulfilling in a very different way. 

Jens_Hoes

I work full time, and will continue to after baby.  I work 35 hours a week, but only M-Th.  My mother has graciously agreed to take care of the baby for as long as she wants to.  We feel lucky because otherwise we'd have to do in home day care, which is obviously not our first choice. 
I wish that I could raise my child (ren) but also enjoy being a working woman.  I'm a child & adolescent therapist, and the work that I do is very hard, and important.  Although I definitely dream of winning the lottery and never working again.


eta: apparently I cannot type

BreadPoetsSociety

Jen_Shoes said:

I work full time, and will continue to after baby.  I work 35 hours a week, but only M-Th.  My mother has graciously agreed to take care of the baby for as long as she wants to.  We feel lucky because otherwise we'd have to do in home day care, which is obviously not our first choice. 
I wish that I could raise my child (ren) but also enjoy being a working woman.  I'm a child & adolescent therapist, and the work that I do is very hard, and important.  Although I definitely dream of winning the lottery and never working again.


eta: apparently I cannot type

To the bolded, I work full-time and I consider myself to be raising my children.  Just pointing out that you may want to tread lightly with statements such as these.  

newmamaro

I currently work Mon-Fri and DS is in daycare. Starting the beginning of February I am taking another position with a lower pay, and will be working 7a-6p 4 days a week. I am still trying to figure out what to do about childcare. Luckily my mom and MIL are able to each help one day a week (and will continue to do so once baby boy arrives), so I just need to figure out the other two days. I'd love to be a SAHM, but can't afford to. It's hard because we won't be able to afford full time childcare for DS, let alone two kids, yet DH still doesn't make enough to cover our debt/bills with me not working a full time job. 

hp_momma

BreadPoetsSociety said:

Jen_Shoes said:

I work full time, and will continue to after baby.  I work 35 hours a week, but only M-Th.  My mother has graciously agreed to take care of the baby for as long as she wants to.  We feel lucky because otherwise we'd have to do in home day care, which is obviously not our first choice. 
I wish that I could raise my child (ren) but also enjoy being a working woman.  I'm a child & adolescent therapist, and the work that I do is very hard, and important.  Although I definitely dream of winning the lottery and never working again.


eta: apparently I cannot type

To the bolded, I work full-time and I consider myself to be raising my children.  Just pointing out that you may want to tread lightly with statements such as these.  

I think the same can be said to those who say "they enjoy their job" or "worked hard for their degree" and choose not be a SAHM. I loved teaching and definitely worked hard for my degree and continue to work towards additional advanced degrees.

My point is that EVERYTHING regarding choosing to be a SAHM or working mom can be taken offensively. Being a parent today is hard, everyone is constantly criticizing your choices for everything. In the end, you do what works for YOU and your family! 

BreadPoetsSociety

h&pmomma said:

BreadPoetsSociety said:

Jen_Shoes said:

I work full time, and will continue to after baby.  I work 35 hours a week, but only M-Th.  My mother has graciously agreed to take care of the baby for as long as she wants to.  We feel lucky because otherwise we'd have to do in home day care, which is obviously not our first choice. 
I wish that I could raise my child (ren) but also enjoy being a working woman.  I'm a child & adolescent therapist, and the work that I do is very hard, and important.  Although I definitely dream of winning the lottery and never working again.


eta: apparently I cannot type

To the bolded, I work full-time and I consider myself to be raising my children.  Just pointing out that you may want to tread lightly with statements such as these.  

I think the same can be said to those who say "they enjoy their job" or "worked hard for their degree" and choose not be a SAHM. I loved teaching and definitely worked hard for my degree and continue to work towards additional advanced degrees.

EVERYTHING regarding choosing to be a SAHM or working mom can be taken offensively. Being a parent today is hard, everyone is constantly criticizing your choices for everything. In the end, you do what works for YOU and your family! 

Oh, I totally agree, whatever works for you and your family!  

I didn't take offense to what she said but I can absolutely see how others could because it gives the impression that if you're working then you're not raising your kids.  

Just wanted to nicely point it out!

cclaineDC

I'll be a FTM and I plan to keep working. I really like my job, and I think they'll allow me to work flexible hours if needed.

Jens_Hoes

@BreadPoetsSociety I should have added "full time" - meaning being with them practically 24/7 (and not having my mother raise them during the day as I currently plan) I mean nothing against working mothers who have to or choose to work.  I wrote my post quickly as I was eating my lunch at work, and even had to edit what I wrote initially. It is not a choice for me, but no shade against anyone who chooses anything for their children.
And I agree with what @h&pmomma said that depends on how you read some of the above statements that they can come across as snarky for whichever side you are on. But again, no shade was intended in my post.

NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot

I also didn't mean to throw shade on other degrees or SAHMs.  I originally was going to include something in my original post about the legal field still stuck in its male-dominated ways. I'm not longer at a firm.  But when I had DD, it was difficult to take my 12 weeks leave, which is generous in the legal profession.  I took it, but I can't imagine taking much more or even taking a few years off in this profession.

I now work in-house at a large company with generous leave and benefits and I don't have the same concerns about leave.  That said, I still don't think I could take a few years off at my current job and then easily find a new in-house job.  It's really fast paced and resume gaps are hard to justify.

I'm not a great parent when I spend all day with my kid and I definitely wouldn't be great at teaching her all the awesome things she learns in a center.  I'm completely fine with her spending every weekday learning age-appropriate skills.  I also know plenty of SAHMs who are great at working with their kids on said skills. I'm just not.   

jayandaplus

I am a full time nurse in an emergency department but pick up extra shifts in multiple locations. I technically have no maternity leave (I'm incredibly jealous of those who have any time, let alone 12 weeks!) FMLA covers my job for 8 weeks but I only get paid what I have accrued in PTO, which will be about 5 weeks for me. DH gets 6 weeks paid!

Our plan is to have me work every other weekend so we get family time weekday evenings and every other weekend. I was a nanny before becoming a nurse so I love the idea of being able to do any SAH time. At the same time, I'd like to work to maintain my skills, get out of the house and make some play money. We're fortunate that it's what we want and that we can do it. 

JCWhitey

Full time employed. I'll work PT and stay home through the summer and go back into the office in the fall.  I love my job and have no desire to be SAH.  I'm just not cut out for it.  DH is a teacher so he's home for the summers.  

nursemom-2

I'm an RN at a hospital so I work three days a week and will continue to do so after my 12 weeks of maternity leave

BabyMC517

I currently work FT at a college and plan to go back FT after baby arrives. We simply can't afford for me not to. I have FMLA for 12 weeks, but have to use sick and vacation time if I want to be paid, which is about 7 weeks, maybe a little longer. The good part is I can still use the rest of the time throughout the year, so take a day off here and there and it will fall under FMLA. H doesn't get anything, except the birth day, but he has a ton of vacation and sick, so we're planning on having him use that at some point. Maybe some at the beginning and some when I go back to work. Mom and MIL will help for awhile, which is awesome! Child care is so expensive! 

Cubslove12

As a teacher due in May I'm feeling blessed that I'll have an extended maternity leave! I'll be going back the next school year full time. I'm lucky my husband works 24on/48 off, so we are hoping we can use family (2-3 days a week) for the first few years before she starts school. I think it will be awesome that she'll get a mixture of mom and dad! 

hp_momma

@NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot  I definitely didn't take offense to your post, I just wanted to point out that either side could take offense depending on how they read it! 

I totally think teaching is probably one of the easier professions to leave and come back to. It's definitely more family oriented as well. 

And I also 100% believe that being a SAHM is not for everyone! Certain personalities thrive in certain situations. My SIL recently decided to leave her corporate job to stay home with her three kids and she is already regretting it and looking for a way back into work! 

march2008

I'm sort of half and half as I only work per diem and average around 4-6 days per month. I'll be unavailable for 12 weeks after baby is born, but will continue to be available for some weekend shifts after that.