I currently have 2. 1) I seriously need to prepare for a trial that I have to testify at next month. I can only think about baby. ugghhhh. 2) I hate it when things say "studies show" but don't reference the studies. You need to reference. You can't just say that. It's irresponsible.
#1 - It's Monday, and I'm still pregnant, which means I'm still working. I totally put off something all weekend that is due Tues, knowing that if I didn't have the baby I could work on it today, but now I actually have to work on it, which is annoying.
#2 - DH had apparently mentally planned on me having the baby early (or at least on time), and now that I'm late he has several things scheduled at work during what should be his paternity leave that he's not sure he can reschedule. Good thinking, DH.
One more - maternity clothes designers are cruel. I swear they are all like... "let's make these shirts just an inch and a half too short for mom to be comfortable that she won't have belly hanging out." "Oooo should we stick annoying tags that can't be removed down in the middle of a seam that is way bigger than it needs to be?! OF COURSE WE SHOULD!" "I can't remember if there are other types of neck lines other than scoop necks that make your bra stick out as you pull the shirt that's slightly too short down for the 100th time that day. I think that's the only way to make a shirt" "These buttons should pop themselves out of the their holes, right?" "Let's make this panel end in the most awkward space. Also, let's make the panels dark and all the shirts light so they show through."
We switched from Verizon to Sprint last week because it would be saving us nearly $50 a month and Sprint pays your cancellation fees when you switch to them. Got the first bill yesterday, it was $24 MORE than our Verizon bill ever was. When we were in Sprint with the salesman (assistant manager of branch), he told us that for the unlimited it was $100/month, but since we had previously had an employer discount, he'd put it at $90, then we did the BOGO on the Samsung S7. Well, on the bill, our unlimited was $110, and no BOGO. When I called Sprint, they said that to get to the $90/month we would have to do auto pay (never mentioned), and sign up for the employer discount (was never informed of this either) AND that the BOGO promotion had ended at the beginning of November and they weren't sure why it was offered to up since we signed up at the end of November.
Called the store we did our business with, and of course the salesman we worked with isn't in today, so I spoke to his manager. Now the manager is making calls to figure out what he can do for us. But I am also about to call Verizon and see what we need to do to come back and see what we have to do since we cannot trade in our Sprint phones (need to return for full refund), we no longer have our Verizon phones (had to turn in for the specials), and since we would be leaving Sprint, we still owe on our old phones.
1) I miss when they had discounted phones for signing a 2 year contract 2) I did not want to spend my Monday dealing with cell phones. Knowing my luck, we'll go return our cell phones to Sprint, then walk to the car and my water will break, thus leaving us cellphone less.
Today is the first day of my maternity leave and Dh isn't scheduled anywhere today so he's still here and hasn't left for any goodwill work. I love the man dearly but I have so much I want to do as far as cleaning and he ends up not helping and hiding in his office and playing computer games. He promised to help today so we'll see.
My other one is I brought home grading tat needs to happen like asap. Thankfully I can input grades from home.
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@slartybartfast I had the belly exposed situation yesterday without realizing it! I went for a walk and wore a maternity work out tank with my husband's sweatshirt over top of it. Now granted, I had accidentally shrunk his sweatshirt the day before, but it still should have been plenty large enough to cover me. When I got back from my walk, I noticed that the bottom of my belly was exposed and very very cold. I feel like all maternity tops should just be tunic length to ensure full coverage! I bought some non-maternity tunic length tank tops for sleeping tops, well, they also now expose my belly. Augh.
@slartybartfast - yes, especially to the too short shirts. I would also add that, there may be no way around this, but having a nice line where my pants panel ends when I try to wear a form fitting shirt is especially fantastic. Also, it's a good thing this pregnancy is almost over, because I'm pretty sure 90% of my maternity clothes somehow have gotten stains on the belly that I can't see unless I look in the mirror. So I apparently walk around most of the time with stains on my clothes that I am unaware of. Or, at this point, aware of, but I can't get them out in the wash and I'm not buying new clothes.
@AbriannaO the new cell phone contracts are ridiculous! DH and I are due for an upgrade on phones, but after looking into the new lease your phone or buy it outright we decided to keep what we have until they no longer work. I smashed my screen last week and thought maybe I'd be able to get a new phone but nope, too difficult, easier and cheaper to just replace the glass. We also had issues with AT&T when we signed up, the bill was never what they quoted us. I don't know how they can get away with it. So, I feel for you! Good luck!
Am I the only one intentionally walking around in belly shirts because of how damned sexy I look? @penelope4612 Consider the stained-shirt treatment as good training for parenthood. So many stains. @slartybartfast I knew you couldn't make 9 months without ending up on the wrong side of the law and in a courtroom. I'm glad to hear they've finally caught you!
On my lunch break, I bought panty liners, a heating pad, and hemorrhoid ointment - all to be used immediately. Then I had to figure out how to stealthily sneak the panty liners and ointment into my work bathroom without drawing the attention of coworkers to all of my hiney needs. Need anymore be said about my Monday BF? It's just one of those days.
Three of us have thrush. I don't normally do the poor me thing but... can something just be easy... anything? The boys feedings are taking forever since their mouths are sore, my nipples are killing me and it's my first full week in my own. Oh and I'm still not having regular poops, so that's not helping my mood. My pediatricians office is a bunch of morons today and I'm negotiating with my OB about calling in Diflucan for my thrush. No, you don't need to see me... I just saw a LC who confirmed it and said she'd call if they needed her to, and two of my babies have thrush. I will literally jack up someone's day if they call back insisting to see me. The world needs to stop testing me today... I'm about to go bitch mode.
Ugh @DiFazette that sounds pretty awful... you deserve a poor me moment for sure. I hope the thrush clears up for all of you soon and that your nips can get some relief!
I'm going to bitch about this in several places because I'm just that mad. I had my 40 week appointment today, just happened to be on my due date, and the only doc in the practice I dislike was the one to see me today. She immediately said she wanted to schedule my induction for next Monday at exactly 41 weeks. I was like, lady, I am not even technically late yet, slow your effing roll. And I'm FTM so I'm really not late statistically. Then she tried to guilt me by saying the risk of stillborn goes up the longer I wait. I'm totally low risk and not AMA so I'm pretty sure she's actually wrong based on the study she's referring to. Argh. So she pressured me hard into doing the membrane strip today. I was going to put it off to 41 weeks but she said the sooner the better. So I let her do the strip, under pressure, then was mad the whole way home. But the hell if I'm getting induced at exactly 41 weeks.
@SaraRose83 I would totally put in a complaint and request to not be seen by that dr any more. I think it's ridiculous that they would pressure you into decisions like that. I feel like there are certain Drs who treat FTMs like complete idiots and assume the right to bully them into decisions under the guise of just being an uninformed, inexperienced, FTM. I'm sorry you are still reeling.. I'd have a hard time not calling back to go about issuing a formal complaint.
@SaraRose83 Sorry you feel like you were pressured into something you didn't want to do. My OB liked to throw around the still birth risks weeks ago when we were just taking about post-term protocol. It definitely feels like fear mongering some times.
@SaraRose83 I agree with @Christinaruth74 - I would speak to someone about her bedside manner. It's ridiculous to feel that kind of pressure unnecessarily when you're already under so much pressure. I changed practices last pregnancy because I had issues with a couple of the providers there. Now we're in a wonderful practice where they TRULY put the patient's preferences first, whatever they may be. Definitely advocate for you because I wouldn't want her to be the one delivering my baby, if I could help it.
@SaraRose83 my doula calls it playing the "dead baby" card. Once you're aware of it, you'll notice it's used QUITE often!!! There is a lot of bullying in obstetrics and it's not okay. This is all aside from the obvious fact that nothing magical happens to your body at 40 weeks (and quite frankly, maybe you aren't even 40 weeks yet! depending on when/if you ovulated, etc!)
My RCS is on Wednesday, DH will be with me, but my mom was planning on being a big help in recovery room and generally helping after Lucas is born. She just called me this morning and told me she caught a cold, but that the worst was yesterday (said she felt feverish) and she is already feeling better. I'm told her that if she is sick, I don't want her at the hospital, because there are a gazillion newborns there- including mine! They shouldn't be exposed to her germs. DH was sitting next to me while I was talking to her, and he doesn't want her there if showing any symptoms. And I agree. But she was already acting like it's no biggie, and she is already feeling so much better. In reality, I think she is just playing it off. I don't want her germs, and I don't want her to be upset. I might have to be a jerk and tell her not to help or visit.
So yesterday my mother who I haven't had any contact with in almost a year except for when she came to my house in October begging for forgiveness and to be in mine and LOs life(I gave her a chance, she chose drugs over us) & The night before Thanksgiving where she once again popped up at my house uninvited and unannounced and I ignored the door and let her leave and texted her later that night and said I didn't appreciate her just popping up at my house and bringing other people with her, she caught ab attitude with me when she tried to give me a sob story to try to wiggle her way back into my life and I told her I don't care I don't have any sympathy or forgiveness or compassion in my heart for someone that chose drugs over their child and grandchild, she got pissed with me and proceeded to tell me that i chose my husband over my family and I had to correct her and say no I just keep my distance because they're all a bunch of drug addicts and alcoholics and backstabbers and nothing but drama and I don't have time for it. She texted last night begging once again saying that she's sorry for everything she's done that's made me feel the way I feel about her and that she loves me and my son more than we'll ever know and he means more to her than anyone will ever understand and that she hoped I can find it in my heart to forgive her and let her be in my son's life and she won't let me down this time around and I just ignored the message because I've given her too many chances all my life and it's gotten us nowhere but where we are now and I just want to be happy and im very happy with where I am in life. I love her and would love nothing more than to have her around but I know it'll just end in heartbreak again.
Thank you so much for your support! I think I will put in a complaint and tell them I don't want to see her again. I scheduled my next appointment with another doc and I'll tell her too that I felt pushed into the membrane sweep and that I felt under pressure to induce. My fear is her being the one on call to deliver my baby. I'm going to try to request that another doc is called in if that happens. Thank goodness I'll have my doula in the room with me, but that doc is just not respectful of my preferences at all.
I agree, it's totally fear-mongering and trying to create guilty feelings. It's so inappropriate that some docs use their authority to try to push people around.
@wynterwaddell ugh I'm so sorry you're dealing with this right now. Navigating healthy boundaries with family can be tough even in the best case scenarios, but when you add elements of dysfunction involving addicition and substance abuse... it's just plain painful. Hugs❤️
@wynterwaddell I am so sorry you are going through that. I have family members with addiction issues too, and it's really hard because it just seems like a never ending roller coaster of forgiveness and betrayal and that can make you hard so you can protect yourself. But it sounds like you are setting boundaries, so you're standing up for yourself and your family.
3 weeks after our baby shower I asked the person who self-appointed themselves to take photos how the photos turned out. Turns out she forgot to put a memory card in her camera. Seriously?! No one else took pics bc she was walking around with her camera
@Christinaruth74 Yeah it's definitely complicated but over time I've just learned to deal with it. I don't worry about it anymore. k guess I've mostly been a doormat for my family most of my life because I never really spoke up about anything because I just didn't feel like arguing and there was already enough conflict around all the time so I think they're just not used to me speaking up and saying how I feel and setting boundaries but I have to say I definitely feel much better now that I'm not the doormat anymore. In time they'll get over it if not ohwell. I'm an adult and I don't need anyone to try to force themselves into my life unwelcomed. That's one of my grandmother's biggest problems with me now is the fact that she's got serious control problems. I lived with her on and off throughout my life and she has always controlled everything her kids done, her youngest daughter is 23 with 3 kids and she doesn't have a licence and can't drive either and can't cook if it doesn't come out of a box with instructions because my grandmother is such a control freak she would never teach her to drive or to cook and she has just now gotten her very first job at a waffle House because she's lived with my grandmother her whole life and my grandmother always said either she didn't need to get a job or drive or anything or she wouldn't be able to get one because she never finished school. All of my aunt's and uncles have always lived with her and she's always basically controlled Everything they done. My mother has only held down one or two jobs because she's never wanted to work anyways and my grandmother always done the same thing with her and always lived with her and let her be in control so she doesn't like the fact that I'm not letting her control my life. Even after I moved out and got married she still tried it and then when I found out I was pregnant she called me raising hell because she's not gonna be in control and be in control of how my children are raised. When I lived there before I got nsrried I didn't have a job and couldn't drive or anything because she wouldn't take Me to work and she wouldn't teach me but after I moved out ad got marriedvi got a job ad can drive and all if the things I should have been able to before and now I have a baby coming and a nice house and a nice car and s good loving husband that works everyday to take care of us and I get to be a stay at home mom and wife and I'm happy with that. A lot has changed for Me. I'm past all of te bad things and I'm just looking forward to a happy healthy life and family.
@SaraRose83 I've had to learn to set boundaries and everything for the sake of my family and our happiness and so far it's worked out well and it will continue to work. But it's just hard sometimes because a part of you loves them and wants to forgive them and let them in but you can't because you know it'll end the way it always does.
DH made dinner (chicken, mushroom, pasta thing) and he put a whole bunch of crushed red pepper flakes. Wtf. I can't eat that right now. My mouth is on fire from the small amount I ate, can only imagine how my stomach acts later.
@wynterwaddell Exactly. I've seen some family members recover for a few years and I try to cherish those, knowing I can lose them again at any time, but I've learned to set my expectations to their addictions being cyclical.
It's obviously not Monday anymore, but when has that ever stopped a rant? My doctor appointment got me down this morning. First, I was scheduled at 8:30 and didn't see my doctor until 9:30. I sat buck naked from the waist down in the most boring cold room for 45 minutes Next, she had a small conversation with me about all of my numbers, including my immense weight gain. I've very consistently gained a chunk of weight every single time I've gone in - never in spurts, but it never slows down. I've gained (gulp) 75 pounds. I'm trying not to stress about it because I truly don't understand it as I am a pretty healthy individual with good habits. Sure I'm not a rabbit eater and am by no means perfect, but I have walked a lot throughout my pregnancy and eat a lot of fruits & veggies. Next, she went over all of the possibilities of what is to come in the next week and a half if little man doesn't make his grand appearance... which I am not dilated at all and his head isn't engaged so soon isn't looking promising. It was a lot harder than I thought hearing about the chances of a long labor/delivery/possible c-section. I know shes' just trying to prepare me for the worst, but I didn't take it in stride as well as I normally do. I'm a religious person and definitely am trying to just give it to God and know it's His way, not mine, but am struggling. I feel like these hormones got me all over the place - I am handling some things way better than I expected, then others not well at all. There's no point in stressing over a voluntary labor that I cannot control, but I'm starting to see where the anxiety really starts to creep in for those overdue.
@temmetime Have you tried a birth ball/peanut ball? I was able to get E from -3 to 0 in 4 hours of bouncing, and hip circling on a peanut ball. It might help or it might just make a decent chair once LO is here.
Formerly known as Kate08young August '18 Siggy April Showers:
Me: 28 H: 24 Married: 7/22/14 Baby L: 8/4/2015 August 2015 Moms Baby E: 11/18/2016 December 2016 Moms TTC #3 08/2017 BFP 11/27/2017. Twin B lost 11/22/2017, Twin A doing well.
@temmetime eff your ob. if you have gained 75 lbs, it's for a good reason, I have seen your HDBD photos, you look fine and screw them for making you feel stressed about it. pants down on a cold table for 45 min, been there, and didn't go back, that's absurd to make someone wait half naked for a check that is probably wholly unnecessary anyhow. and try not to get worked up about the lack of dilation or engagement. it absolutely infuriates me when docs make things out to be issues when it can be completely normal- sometimes baby doesn't engage until labor starts, even in FTM. you can do some lunges or deep squats to try to open the pelvis, might help bring him down especially if baby isn't in a good position, but no guarantee.
@temmetime - having your OB prepare you for the worst case is definitely something that can feel frustrating. Three different doctors told me my LO was breech from weeks 30-36 but that they "didn't worry about it" until week 36 and got me pretty worked up and concerned about a version or an C-section and then at 36 weeks, LO was right where he needed to be. I feel like I wasted a lot of energy worrying but then if he had been breech and no one had warned me I would have felt frustrated as well. But my anyway it seems like there is still time for baby to drop and some babies won't do it until your in labor. Agree that walking and bouncing on a ball should help.
Just chiming in to say screw that @temmetime! I fully agree with the other comments and think the whole "worst case scenario " prep is a ridiculous approach unless there are clear red flags. Babies can go from unengaged to locked and loaded and born in weeks, days, or hours. It was about 1 day for my DS. Your body is not broken.
@temmetime I second not getting down on yourself with the weight gain. Sometimes our bodies do crazy things during pregnancy. So long as you and the baby are healthy right now, please don't stress the weight. My first pregnancy my Dr bullied me on weight gain once I hit 10 pounds. I was so stressed I'd cry before every appointment just knowing there would be rude comments. I gained about 45 by the end of it and had a 6 pounds baby. I ate healthy and walked every day. But the weight kept adding on.
This time I wasn't as healthy with food or exercise and gained 26. No explanation for the difference except my body handled this pregnancy different. Bodies are crazy.
Your weight is not a reflection of you, your commitment to a healthy baby, or a measure of being a good mom. So please don't be so hard on yourself. I know it's tough. I'm crying just writing this...darn hormones!
i'm late to the BF but....don't freaking ask me "no baby yet?" while you are staring at my obviously pregnant body..baby is obviously still in there! I should have replied "yeah I left her at home for the day" *eyeroll*
and WHILE I'm trying to keep busy...everyday that goes by and me not going into labor on my own and getting one day closer to my induction date has me stressed out
Late BF here too. MIL wants to come stay with us for two weeks after the holidays to "help" us... and she keeps telling DH that the way we are going about certain things is wrong. Like we should add cereal to her milk, she should be sleeping thru the night by now (3 wks), and on and on and on. She asked my husband if he was reading Dr. Spock and when he said he was taking advice of our doctors, she said they must be reading Dr. Spock who "knows nothing" about taking care of a baby.
I know if she stays here i *will* lose my shit and do irreparable damage to our relationship. (She is the type to never forget a perceived slight and is always super negative. The first thing she said when we told her LOs name was "that is [BIL]'s ex-wife's name")
I really appreciate the offer for help but i know it will drive me nuts having her here to comment on everything. I have to call her tomorrow and i am absolutely dreading it. Is it wrong to say that we dont need the help?
@ea301 - why are you calling MIL and not your DH? I would probably make him do it. If I had to I'd probably say I appreciate the offer but am not feeling up for visitors and leave it at that. If you elaborate on being tired or overwhelmed she'll use it as a reason to support her case of coming to stay.
Re: Monday BF 12-5
1) I seriously need to prepare for a trial that I have to testify at next month. I can only think about baby. ugghhhh.
2) I hate it when things say "studies show" but don't reference the studies. You need to reference. You can't just say that. It's irresponsible.
#2 - DH had apparently mentally planned on me having the baby early (or at least on time), and now that I'm late he has several things scheduled at work during what should be his paternity leave that he's not sure he can reschedule. Good thinking, DH.
I swear they are all like... "let's make these shirts just an inch and a half too short for mom to be comfortable that she won't have belly hanging out."
"Oooo should we stick annoying tags that can't be removed down in the middle of a seam that is way bigger than it needs to be?! OF COURSE WE SHOULD!"
"I can't remember if there are other types of neck lines other than scoop necks that make your bra stick out as you pull the shirt that's slightly too short down for the 100th time that day. I think that's the only way to make a shirt"
"These buttons should pop themselves out of the their holes, right?"
"Let's make this panel end in the most awkward space. Also, let's make the panels dark and all the shirts light so they show through."
Called the store we did our business with, and of course the salesman we worked with isn't in today, so I spoke to his manager. Now the manager is making calls to figure out what he can do for us. But I am also about to call Verizon and see what we need to do to come back and see what we have to do since we cannot trade in our Sprint phones (need to return for full refund), we no longer have our Verizon phones (had to turn in for the specials), and since we would be leaving Sprint, we still owe on our old phones.
1) I miss when they had discounted phones for signing a 2 year contract
2) I did not want to spend my Monday dealing with cell phones. Knowing my luck, we'll go return our cell phones to Sprint, then walk to the car and my water will break, thus leaving us cellphone less.
My other one is I brought home grading tat needs to happen like asap. Thankfully I can input grades from home.
@penelope4612 Consider the stained-shirt treatment as good training for parenthood. So many stains.
@slartybartfast I knew you couldn't make 9 months without ending up on the wrong side of the law and in a courtroom. I'm glad to hear they've finally caught you!
On my lunch break, I bought panty liners, a heating pad, and hemorrhoid ointment - all to be used immediately. Then I had to figure out how to stealthily sneak the panty liners and ointment into my work bathroom without drawing the attention of coworkers to all of my hiney needs. Need anymore be said about my Monday BF? It's just one of those days.
Baby #1
Baby #2
~04/19/16 EDD 12/26/16~
SaveSaveSaveSave
Formerly known as Kate08young
August '18 Siggy April Showers:
Married: 7/22/14
Baby L: 8/4/2015 August 2015 Moms
Baby E: 11/18/2016 December 2016 Moms
TTC #3 08/2017 BFP 11/27/2017.
Twin B lost 11/22/2017, Twin A doing well.
Baby #1
Baby #2
~04/19/16 EDD 12/26/16~
SaveSaveSaveSave
Follow your instincts and stick to your guns!
She texted last night begging once again saying that she's sorry for everything she's done that's made me feel the way I feel about her and that she loves me and my son more than we'll ever know and he means more to her than anyone will ever understand and that she hoped I can find it in my heart to forgive her and let her be in my son's life and she won't let me down this time around and I just ignored the message because I've given her too many chances all my life and it's gotten us nowhere but where we are now and I just want to be happy and im very happy with where I am in life. I love her and would love nothing more than to have her around but I know it'll just end in heartbreak again.
I agree, it's totally fear-mongering and trying to create guilty feelings. It's so inappropriate that some docs use their authority to try to push people around.
My doctor appointment got me down this morning. First, I was scheduled at 8:30 and didn't see my doctor until 9:30. I sat buck naked from the waist down in the most boring cold room for 45 minutes
Next, she went over all of the possibilities of what is to come in the next week and a half if little man doesn't make his grand appearance... which I am not dilated at all and his head isn't engaged so soon isn't looking promising. It was a lot harder than I thought hearing about the chances of a long labor/delivery/possible c-section. I know shes' just trying to prepare me for the worst, but I didn't take it in stride as well as I normally do. I'm a religious person and definitely am trying to just give it to God and know it's His way, not mine, but am struggling.
I feel like these hormones got me all over the place - I am handling some things way better than I expected, then others not well at all. There's no point in stressing over a voluntary labor that I cannot control, but I'm starting to see where the anxiety really starts to creep in for those overdue.
DS: 12/20/16
EDD: 11/29/18
Formerly known as Kate08young
August '18 Siggy April Showers:
Married: 7/22/14
Baby L: 8/4/2015 August 2015 Moms
Baby E: 11/18/2016 December 2016 Moms
TTC #3 08/2017 BFP 11/27/2017.
Twin B lost 11/22/2017, Twin A doing well.
DS: 12/20/16
EDD: 11/29/18
My Wedding Bio!
DS: 12/20/16
EDD: 11/29/18
This time I wasn't as healthy with food or exercise and gained 26. No explanation for the difference except my body handled this pregnancy different. Bodies are crazy.
Your weight is not a reflection of you, your commitment to a healthy baby, or a measure of being a good mom. So please don't be so hard on yourself. I know it's tough. I'm crying just writing this...darn hormones!
and WHILE I'm trying to keep busy...everyday that goes by and me not going into labor on my own and getting one day closer to my induction date has me stressed out
BFP#1 & MC:August 2015 BFP: #2 10/01/2015 MC: 10/09/2015 BFP #3: 12/22/2015 @ 5 weeks MC/CP: 12-23-2015
Fertility Appointment: Feb 23/16, Hysteroscopy 03/02/2016,
BFP #4: 03/31/16 EDD 12/01/2016
I know if she stays here i *will* lose my shit and do irreparable damage to our relationship. (She is the type to never forget a perceived slight and is always super negative. The first thing she said when we told her LOs name was "that is [BIL]'s ex-wife's name")
I really appreciate the offer for help but i know it will drive me nuts having her here to comment on everything. I have to call her tomorrow and i am absolutely dreading it. Is it wrong to say that we dont need the help?
DS: 12/20/16
EDD: 11/29/18