Randoms - Week of November 28th

dragonfaerie

Have any thoughts, questions, feelings, fears, etc.? Spill them here!

This is a good place to ask questions to a broader audience than the weekly check-ins, so ladies in other trimesters with experience may chime in and help you out!

kdanjou

Now that my bloating isn't as bad it's hard to believe there is a baby in there.  My nausea has subsided somewhat as well so now I'm sort of just waiting for a real baby bump.  It's making me nervous and I can't wait to hear the heartbeat again at my next appointment in nine days.

wifeinraleigh28

@kdanjou I get so nervous too waiting for each appointment. I know that all is probably going just fine but I can't help but worry. My next one is Wednesday and I just keep thinking of the relief I will feel when we hear that strong heart beat again. I don't think these nerves will ever go away! I'm thinking of buying a doppler to keep at home but I wonder if that will just cause me more anxiety.

dragonfaerie

I have heard from many sources that having a doppler at home can cause more issues than solve. For starters, sometimes you can't find the heartbeat, so it makes your anxiety worse. And some babies don't like the echo from the doppler, so they move around a lot, causing you to not be able to find it and giving baby some stress. Then I've heard that it can actually hurt their ears if used too often (mixed reviews there.)
Check in with your doc about how they feel about at-home machines before you spend the money.  My OB would just sneak me in between appointments if I was stressed and needed to hear Wee Boy.

AandDM2014

@kdanjou That was me every single day, even though I still had symptoms! I still get a little worried every now and then and have to take out my doppler to soothe my worried brain.

@wifeinraleigh28 I've found mine to be helpful. I tired using it a few times before 12 weeks, and I couldn't find anything once, and only found one once, but after that when I started doing abdominal ultrasounds and knew approximately where they were hanging out, it's become easy to find them all quickly. I can start and finish in less than a minute (since I know you aren't supposed to hold the doppler over the baby for too long) and hear three lovely hearts.

wifeinraleigh28

Thanks for the input @dragonfaerie and @AandDM2014. I will ask my OB what she thinks at my appt on Wednesday. I know that after Wednesday I won't be seen again for 4 weeks and that is just too long for me!

AandDM2014

@wifeinraleigh28 I can almost guarantee she will tell you to not get one. It is never recommended to use a doppler at home as you are not a trained professional (unless you are of course).

mskeenan

I'm glad I have the Doppler but I really had to tell myself not to use it often so I really didn't use it much at all .  It was nice to have as a back up just in case but I have also read that it can be bad to expose the lil babes to it . It has definitely come in handy on the few instances that movement decreased or I had some bleeding (which I went to the doc for anyway - but it was good instant reassurance )  . My doc is aware that I have one and didn't seem to mind . It was difficult for me to reliably find the heart beat earlier on which did stress me out a bit ! 

MelD17011

The last couple nights I've woken up several times to my hands asleep. anyone else experience this? I have an ob appt today so going to ask about it - not a symptom I've heard of

ale9687

@meld17011 it happens to me often. I usually find one of my arms was pinned down under my body pillow causing my entire arm to fall asleep. Try elevating yourself a little bit while you sleep to help the blood flow. 

Griffin5413

@meld17011 - I've started waking up with my hands in pain like it hurts to open and close them. Are you finding that the hand falling asleep is the side you sleep on? I know pregnancy induced carpel tunnel can be a problem. I think I clench my fists when I sleep when I'm stressed though. Doesn't ever hurt to ask your OB though. 

dragonfaerie

@meld17011 I think I have  started curling up and sleeping on my hands, but carpal tunnel could also be the culprit

dragonfaerie

Ugh, I am super short of breath and snuffly this morning, it's making me lethargic. I have errands to run but all I want to do is zone out. not sure if it's weather change, Wee Boy squishing my lungs, or both,  but talk about a motivation killer!

MelD17011

thanks Ladies- she said it is probably carpal tunnel and normal. but she did say it might get worse since I'm experiencing it already - ugh..... but on a positive note, we got o hear the heartbeat for the first time today!!

Tulips29

@Griffin5413 I totally wake up feeling the same in my hands, like it hurts to open and close them but not really painful...it's more like my fingers feel super swollen. Feet too, I feel like I have bear paws when I get out of bed. I think it might be all that water retention too. I'll ask my OB today. 

@MelD17011 so excited you got to hear the heartbeat today, it's such a special moment for sure

ADRIANAC1982

Update: 

Good afternoon ladies, 

Today's appointment went in my opinion better. We had the original u/s tech from our first visit who spoke to us, and really went that extra mile.  The dr we saw who is partners with our regular MFM specialist was a little odd, she came into the u/s room and spoke to us there instead of taking us to an office. 

They were able to see 3 small pockets of fluid but because they are small they dont really consider them, but I do. I feel like its at least something. Some is better than none. 

Babys heart rate was 148, and then 150ish when they checked it again so that has been consistent. We also saw baby move, so that was reassuring and im convinced he waved at us, just to let us know hes hanging on... 

We have all our appointments schedule through the month of December and if we make it until then i will be admitted at the start of the New Year. So fingers crossed we get through the holidays and make it to the hospital staycation! That is all I'm asking Santa for this Christmas

babylonghorn16

@ADRIANAC1982 so good to hear from you!!! I've been checking here daily! All sounds like good news to me. Glad LO is holding on - y'all have a fighter!! Praying HARD for you and your family. Stay strong, Mama!

dragonfaerie

@ADRIANAC1982 So glad to hear your updates! You really have quite a fighter in there.   Praying for you all

tvh1982

Thank you for giving us an update @adrianac1982. 
What a strong little fighter you have!
Ill ask the same from Santa and as we celebrate Sinterklaas on the 5th I'll ask him too!
Sending tons of good vibes and prayers!

Griffin5413

Tulips29 - that sounds exactly like the pain I feel in my hands! I bet you are right about all of the water retention. My hands aren't that swollen but the pain sounds spot on. Let me know what your OB says. 
@ADRIANAC1982- what a little fighter you have! glad to hear updates from you. 

Tulips29

@Griffin5413 he said it sounds like water retention which is normal. Just stay hydrated and drink more during the day. I feel like I already drink a lot but will up my water intake.

@ADRIANAC1982 so happy for your update. Stay strong, you've got this! Will be praying for your family

wifeinraleigh28

@MelD17011 I get numb hands too and I'm pretty sure it's just from sleeping on them funny. I move around a little and it helps but yeah, this happens to me every night. Congrats on hearing your baby's heart beat!

@ADRIANAC1982 Thank you for updating us and I'm so glad your little guy is holding on and doing well. Praying for you to make it to your hospital staycation!!

cato99

@ADRIANAC1982 so glad to hear your update! I've been thinking about you! 

2legbaby

Good news @ADRIANAC1982 ! Thank you for keeping us updated-thinking of you and your little fighter!!!

flanners1

@ADRIANAC1982 thanks for the update, was just thinking of you. Glad you and bubs are fighting on! 

Afm i am writing this from my hospital bed. Some of you ladies from second trimester check-in might remember I was complaining about pressure on my lower abdomen last week, and I was worried it was a symptom of incompetent cervix, given I had surgery on my cervix a few years back. I had it checked on Sunday with my regular Ob and cervix was at 3.5cm, which I was told is still ok. But when I described how the pressure becomes more in evenings, or when walking and when stressed at work, and how it goes away when I relax on weekends on the couch, my OB got me an appointment with a specialist.
I went to see her yesterday and was at 2.5cm after just 5 days. Shocking how quickly it thinned! 
The specialist immediately booked me for a Cerclage surgery this morning at 8am. I got a spinal blockage instead of full anestesia because I'm only 18 weeks and it's less invasive for the baby. All went well, baby is well and kicking, and i have little to no pain. I am on bed rest for a few days and then we see how the cervix is doing. I was told no activity, no walking, standing etc.  Of course I worry what happens in say 6-8 weeks when baby is heavier, but was told to take it one step at a time... 
Long story short- listen to your body ladies. If you feel something is wrong, it generally is and you should insist on getting it checked. 

dragonfaerie

@flanners1 I'm sorry to hear you had to have surgery, but glad that it went smoothly. rest and recover! Prayers for quick healing for you!

AandDM2014

@flanners1 I'm glad you went with your gut! I hope your LO stays put for quite a while longer, and that the stitch helps!

alaaronson

@flanners1- gee. Sorry that happened. Out of curiosity, what was the nature of the pain? Was it constant? Was it severe? I'm wondering if the brief pelvic pains I've been having, that I've been attributing to round ligament pain, could be similar. I guess if they don't go away I'll try to get seen next week. I'm glad everything is working out.

2legbaby

@flanners1 so glad your ob referred you and that you and baby are on the mend. great advice for all about listening to our bodies and if concerned getting it checked out

wifeinraleigh28

@flanners1 So glad to hear your surgery went well and that you listened to your body! Not sure what I would do without the advice of you ladies on here.

flanners1

Thanks everyone, I'm glad we are on the mend and hoping I won't be put on strict bedrest. I also really want to go home for Xmas (it's a 10 hour flight from Asia to Europe). We have a follow-up on Thursday and will see then. Fingers crossed. 

@alaaronson it wasn't really pain and definitely not spams, it was more of a constant pressure, like a heavy weight pushing down on my vagina from inside. It would last for hours or even the whole day and even carry on when I went to bed. I would still mention the pain spasms at your next visit if you worry. You're the patient, you can ask anything you want. 

tvh1982

Oh @flanners1 you don't get a break do you!
Glad to read you are doing ok now. Keeping my fingers crossed they let you fly home for Xmas.
Keep your LO inside as long as possible!

rmarble23

i have had a headache off and on now (mostly on) for 4 days now.  i finally broke down and took some tylenol which helped for half a day and then woke up with it again this morning.  i am miserable, making me almost nauseous.  i am trying to drink water which is hard feeling this crappy, i tried a coffee this morning for a little caffeine, and then finally broke down and took more tylenol.  i feel like an absolute horrible person right now, i struggled for so long to get pregnant and always said i would appreciate everything given to me.  i have been so lucky as to not have any "morning sickness" but this is killing me, i already have no motivation and now i feel i am down for the count due to a stupid headache. its going to be a long 9 months if this is just the beginning

mskeenan

Hang in there @rmarble23 I struggled with the same thing . It was absolutely horrific and my headaches were so bad I was missing work and felt like I couldn't function . You are not a bad person - I know how painful headaches can be . You can still be grateful for your pregnancy but admit that being pregnant can also be very very hard . I was going to suggest the caffeine thing but sounds like that didn't really help . My OB said I was fine to have even a couple of cups of coffee on a day that was really bad headache wise . She's very relaxed , though . 

You may also try heat/cold compresses ? I bought a lavender eye mask and neck wrap on Amazon that could be heated up in the microwave . The heat provided some good temporary relief - didn't solve the problem but did help . Also - try taking a shower and letting the warm water go on your neck . 

What solved my headache problem was chiropractic care . I had never had an adjustment before but my headaches were almost completely gone after a few adjustments . I kept going through my entire pregnancy to make sure they didn't come back . 

I hope you feel better soon ! Take good care and hope you find something that gives you better relied than Tylenol does soon ! Sometimes it can only touch the pain . 

wifeinraleigh28

Sorry about the headaches @rmarble23 I've been getting them too. My OB said I can take magnesium supplements and that those are great for headaches so I'm planning to pick some up. An ice pack on my head helps too. You are definitely not a bad person, pregnancy headaches are horrible!

AandDM2014

@rmarble23 Oh girl I feel ya! Headaches are the worst, and mine have occasionally turned into migraines. When I asked my MFM about what I could do to help, he said it was okay to take 200mg of ibuprofen every now and then before the third tri. I took that with 500 mg of quick release tylenol and used a cold pack and it seemed to help a lot. Staying hydrated is key too. If you can stand plain water, maybe try some hot tea. If you want to go a more natural route, peppermint essential oil has also helped a bit. I rub it on the place that has pain, and then dab a bit under my nose and breathe through my nose to smell it. I felt hesitant at first about taking ibuprofen because everything you read says not to, but I trust my doc and so far babies are doing great.

rmarble23

Thanks ladies I appreciate all the advice. I just don't want to be a Kim Kardashian type and these headaches are making me feel like that. Just me being stupid with these stupid hormones bc I know DH would tell me to cut the crap if I was getting out of hand lol. 

clt2pwm11

@rmarble23 I'm so sorry you are having such terrible headaches. I've had a few over the past weeks, but they haven't been debilitating as yours sound like they have. I do feel you on the Tylenol though. My back pain has been excruciating at times, and I've resorted to Tylenol. Usually it's enough to at least dull the pain so I can sleep. For the past few nights I've used a heating pad and have been sleeping with a pillow to support my belly and that seems to be helping. I hope you find a solution for your pain too!

tvh1982

I think we are way to hard on ourselves.
Its not that because pregnancy doesn't come natural and we worked damm hard on getting pregnant that we have to absolutely love every bit. And feel like a horrible person when we don't appreciate all.
I have felt horrible throughout my whole pregnancy and felt horrible on top as I felt I should be happy I finally was pregnant. I also didn't go to the doctors on time, cause I thought I had to tough it up!

Well ladies, we are allowed not to like all symptoms that come along. We are allowed to complain. We are allowed to have an off day/week/mint/trimester/pregnancy!
It doesn't mean we aren't more than thrilled that we finally are pregnant.
It took me a whole pregnancy to realise that I was way to tough on me, and it took my midwife to convince me of that. 

So it is ok to feel pissed off because of that headache or anything else!

nellin-2

@tvh1982 Yes!
The other thing we need to remember with taking medication is that if we are stressed out and in pain that's also not good for the baby. If you take approved medication so you can sleep/relax then baby will also be happier.

Question - has anyone else been told they won't let you go over term with an IVF singleton?
I'm only 9 weeks but my nurse-midwife will refer me to a specialist at week 20 as standard practice for IVF pregnancies and apparently they won't let IVF babies go over term because they are higher risk. I really want a natural birth if possible and I'd like to avoid being induced if possible as it increases the chance of extra medical intervention including emergency c-section.

I know this is all in the very distant future for me but has anyone else heard of this? I was aware of slightly higher chances of chromosomal abnormalities with IVF but do people know what the issue with going over term would be?

tvh1982

With me they would let me go over estimated due date, but induce at exactly 42 weeks as they don't want me to cook baby longer @nellin.
They never said it was due to risks, but because they know exactly which date she is conceived and my placenta would be working less every week.
I never made it passed 38+4...